NZthrillWriter: Sounds like you need a trip half way across the world.
We were taught running from our problems wasn’t the answer from a young age. I followed that rule my whole life, facing the avalanches that crashed into my hopes and desires. Being kicked out of my house before I was legally an adult, living in my boyfriend’s parent’s basement, was the first of my life changing problems. Little did I know, that one decision would cause a domino effect for the next ten years.
AuthorCoraCart: If only I could get away with that.
NZthrillWriter: I’m calling you.
I sighed. It was 3:30 in the morning in my boring state of Illinois, and I had to meet with my publisher in five hours. I hadn’t slept in weeks, and unfortunately it wasn’t because the mangled words in my brain were flowing down my arms and into my fingertips, transferring into sentences of wisdom and passion. No, it was because I’d finally settled a nasty divorce that had sucked the life out of me since I made the stupid decision to disown my family and live with him.
AuthorCoraCart: It’s late, I should try and go to sleep.
Ignoring my request, Jake rang my phone. I grinned, secretly loving his grit at attempting to make me feel better.
Jake didn’t waste his breath on saying hello when I answered. “I personally think you should get away with traveling. The papers have all been signed, you don’t have any children to attend to, and I can almost guarantee your boss would allow it.”
“She wouldn’t care if I took off for a few weeks, but I’m worried it’d look awful,” I said truthfully. My boss might approve of me leaving, but she most definitely would be disgusted if she found out I were shacking up with another man, even if we were only friends.
“How so? You’re not tied to your jackass of a husband anymore.”
Taking my cell into the bathroom, I tapped the speaker phone on, grabbing a washcloth to rinse off the little makeup that remained from court today.
“Ex-husband,” I corrected. “You of all people know I can’t take risks with where I’m at and who I’m with.”
“That’s where you made the mistake of blasting your beautiful face all over the internet, Love.”
I grinned when he called me beautiful and Love. He was good at the pet names, but I doubted he meant more by them. We were friends, and he had never shown a romantic interest in the years we’d known each other.
“Only allowing your back with breathtaking New Zealand scenery will sell male writer’s books, doesn’t work for females.”
“Doubt that, but you’ll only know if you start another pen name. Maybe write something other than that smut you enjoy so much,” he chided.
I dabbed my face with the washcloth. “I haven’t mastered the art of describing an action scene with guns and what not for that to happen.”
“But you’ve mastered the art of capturing a lonely woman's naughty desire?” He laughed into the phone.
I held my hand to my chest as if I were wounded. “Don’t hate on my fan-base. They need love, too.”
“So do newly freed former wives.”
I took a sharp breath. Jake and I had supported each other with new releases and marketing ideas, helping to figure out what worked and what didn’t in the crazy book world when my publisher didn’t seem to do the trick. If I went for an action scene, I’d send him the scraps of ideas, and he’d help me put them together, while if he had a love scene, I’d throw in my two cents. He was a more “fade to black” type of writer, while I put in more detail.
He was a great associate to have, and I cared deeply for him and valued our long-distant friendship.
“Jake, I just don’t know how I’d explain it to Sandra,” I confessed. She was the reason why I’d been so leery my whole life of what I did with my career. She was amazing and brought me into her world, gave me a shot at a true career, but at the same time, she controlled it. Jake was Indie, and seemed to be killing the charts just fine on his own. I hadn’t cracked that kind of magic on my own yet. My publisher was dear to my heart, but what had tied us together was something I didn’t know how to break free from.
“Sandra is your boss and not your mother-in-law. At least, not anymore. If you tell her you’re taking a sabbatical out of the country to get new writing juice, she’ll be fine. Just promise her a new manuscript by the time you’re back.”
I chewed my lip, staring at my green eyes in the mirror. Jake was right, she didn’t own me. If she wanted to drop me, she would have when I told her Martin, her son, had smacked me around for the last time and that I was meeting with a divorce attorney.
“She does love new manuscripts,” I agreed. “It has been three months since my last release, two since I’ve actually written.”
Jake sucked in a breath of air. “That’s a hell of a long time. If that twat of a woman doesn’t understand, then your ass can finally go Indie and make some really good money.”
I laughed. “I’ll let you run my marketing campaign.”
“Maybe if we meet face to face, you’ll actually listen to me and take my advice,” he scolded playfully.
“I listen, it just seems like a lot of work.”
“Well, Love, that’s how you become successful,” he chuckled.
“I know that, I mean taking the hit on splitting royalties was worth not worrying about it to me.”
“I get it, just think about it, okay?” He said sincerely, coming back to me visiting him. “I’ve got a spare bedroom that overlooks the lake. A change of scenery could help you get your groove back. So could spending time with a longtime friend.”
I smiled, warmth filling me. “Thanks, Jake. I appreciate the offer. I’ll think about it. We could even post a selfie together.”
“A backwards selfie. This mug must remain unknown,” he deadpanned.
“I still don’t understand how that works so well for you,” I joked with him.
Although, I did know why leaving himself a mystery worked. He was built from the back, strong and fit. There were a few shots where his jaw-line snuck in the photo, chiseled with a hint of stubble. It left women wondering and wanting. I had never allowed myself to want, because I was faithful to my husband. Keeping true faith to my marriage didn’t stop my mind from wondering about what he’d look like from the front. I’d tried to snoop around his social media accounts, clicking on a few of the other web pages of who had liked his photos or comments. He had so many, it became impossible to know who actually knew him or if they were loyal readers.
“I can’t show my face because of my top secret real life job,” he teased. I imagined him winking. He seemed like the kind of guy who would do silly things like that. Jake was wonderful via email and over the telephone. There was only one problem holding me back.
Like all of his fans, I had never seen his face. “Or because you don’t have eyes and a nose.”
He barked a laugh into the phone. “Glass eyes still count as eyes.”
Jake was the reason for a few of my beatings. Martin had run across some of our harmless email banter. That was the first time. Another time was when he read a steamy portion of a manuscript Jake had sent me. He took it completely the wrong way, leaving me with a black eye and bruised ribs. That was my last straw. I filed for divorce the next day.
I’d never told Jake about the physical abuse. He didn’t need to hear about that horrible part of my life, only the authorities knew. It was how I got away from him so easily, and how his parents didn’t completely blame me for our divorce.
“I’ll give you that,” I teased. “I need to get to bed. I might have to tell Sandra that I’ll be leaving the country.”
“Now that’s the spirit,” he encouraged. “I’ll look up flights for you.”
Holding back a yawn, I shook my head. “I’ll look them up on my phone once I get into bed.”
“Sleep. It’s 7:30 at night here. I’ll check before I hanker in to write.”
“Alright, fine. Screenshot them and send them my way,” I conceded, throwing my caramel hair into a messy bun and hanging up the washcloth. “I’ll talk to you later.”
“Night, love,” he said, his New Zealand accent blending the two words together.
Hitting my sheets, I took a long inhale in and out of my nose. Being done with the courts and paperwork with Martin was a relief and a load off my shoulders. He’d anchored me for so long that I’d lost my way, but now, I was ready to start fresh.