Chapter Four
Holly
I knew it wasn’t right for me to feel this depressed on a Monday morning. When I was younger, I promised myself that I would never be in a job that made me hate my week and cherish my weekends. I used to find it so sad to hear adults constantly wishing their life away. Yet here I was, doing the same thing. I hadn’t meant for that to happen. I’d gone after the job of my dreams and done my best to fight for what I wanted to do with my life. Pity I’d ended up in a company where everyone hated me. I simply wasn’t cool enough. I used to think it was because I was new. I figured that once they had gotten to know me, they would accept me as one of their own.
But then someone else started about six months after me, and everyone took an immediate liking to her. She became one of them from almost the first day that she started. I’ll never forget that day. I’d been so excited to have someone that was finally newer in the office than me. I pictured taking her under my wing and finally having someone to talk to. By the end of that day, it was clear that I would never fit in with these people, and that my destiny in the company had been set.
I sat in my kitchen now, cradling my coffee and watching as the minutes went by. I’d gotten up far too early, which was never a good thing. I preferred waking up and having just enough time to shower and eat before heading out. The less time I had to think about the upcoming day, the better. The looming day weighed heavily on me now. I decided to call my father. He was always up before the rest of the world so I knew I wouldn’t be waking him up.
“Hello, Rick speaking,” he said. I tried not to laugh. I’d called him on his cell, and I was certain my name would’ve come up on the screen. But for some reason, my father just couldn’t figure out cell phones as well as everyone else. It wasn’t that he wasn’t a modern man or anything. But sometimes technology just got the better of him.
“Hi, Dad.”
“Holly! Wow, this is a nice surprise. First thing on a Monday morning and I get to hear your voice.”
I chuckled. Why couldn’t my work colleagues be as nice as my father? “Well, it’s nice to hear your voice too. I woke up early and figured I’d call to say hi before going in to work. I knew you’d be up too.”
“Of course. I’ve been up for ages already. It’s my favorite time of the day. There’s just something special about the early mornings, don’t you think?”
“I guess so. I like sleeping in too, though.”
He laughed. “You always loved your sleep. Even as a kid. It’s not a bad thing. I read an article about this man who had lived to like two hundred or something.”
I groaned. My father was always finding these articles on the internet, and he couldn’t ever really distinguish which ones were fake and which were real. “Two hundred? Surely not?”
“I’m telling you, Holly. Two hundred. And the reasons were simple ones. He simply didn’t stress. He lived a calm and relaxing life. Stress kills.”
I sighed. “Tell me about it. Well, looks like I won’t be around for much longer than.”
“Holly! Don’t say things like that. What’s going on?”
“No, nothing is going on. I’m just not exactly what you’d call the most relaxed person in the world these days.”
“But why? You should be. You’re so young. There should be no reason for you to stress. Isn’t work going well?”
“Not really. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love the work. I like what I do, and I have no regrets with going into that. But the company is not exactly what I had hoped it to be.”
“How long have you felt this way?”
“Since day one.”
“Since day one? Why didn’t you tell me? Don’t tell me that you just didn’t want to worry me, because you know I’d rather know what’s going on.”
“I know, Dad. It’s not just that. I really hoped it would get better.”
“What’s the problem?”
“Nobody likes me. They all pile on the work so that they can sit back and just relax.”
“But that’s not fair. Have you told your boss? I know you don’t like to tell on people, but it’s not fair that you are doing more work than anyone else.”
I sighed. “The boss doesn’t care. As long as the work gets done, it doesn’t really matter who does it. Anyway, the boss is on their side. Trust me. I just feel like I get bullied there.”
“Bullied? Oh, Holly, you can’t go on, then. You need to learn how to stick up for yourself. You’re a strong woman, and you can’t let them get away with this.”
“I know. But sticking up for myself won’t get me anywhere in a place like that.”
“Then don’t stay there. There are a million jobs out there in the world. Why stick to this one? Don’t let them win. I’m proud of you, Holly. God is proud of you. I pray for you every day, and I know that He is looking out for you. Why don’t you quit and come and live with me for a while? You can use that time to look for another job. The perfect job. It will be nice to have you around anyway.”
I smiled. “I love you, Dad. Thank you. I’ll give about it. I’ll see how this week goes.”
“Don’t think about it too much. You deserve better. We choose our own destiny, remember? So make sure you choose one that makes you happy.”
I felt better after talking to my father, but I wasn’t sure that it was going to make much of a difference. I needed that job, and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go back home. It would feel like I had failed and failure was the last thing I needed after already feeling bad about being bullied. Maybe I just needed to stand up for myself more at work, and start taking on less work. If they could do it, then why couldn’t I?
I got to work with a million thoughts running through my head. It was Monday morning, and I was ready to tackle this day head on. I dropped my bag at my desk and made my way to the coffee machine. I always started the day off with a cup at home and then a cup at work. It was necessary with the amount of work that we had to do each day. As I got to the kitchen, I saw a few of my co-workers huddled by the coffee machine. They were laughing and joking around, and giggled when they saw me coming. They moved over so that I could get some coffee but not one of them even bothered to say hello to me. They stood in silence and the moment I walked out, I heard them start talking again. They were having a good time, and I hadn’t felt that sort of inclusion in such a long time that my heart actually ached for it. There was nothing worse than the feeling of being lonely.
I walked back to my desk, sat down, and sighed. I was just about to start on my work when my boss walked in and dumped a whole new pile of paperwork on my desk.
“More work, Holly. This needs to be done by the end of the day. Understood?”
I sat there, staring at him. No thank you for staying late on Friday to finish my work. No conversation about how my weekend was or how I was doing. And, from the look of things, no work given to anyone else but me. What was wrong with me? Was I really such a fool? Was I going to spend my entire life being bullied by people just because I didn’t know how to stand up for myself? I wasn’t the same Holly from school days. I was a strong and independent woman. If I left this place, they would all suffer without me because there would be nobody to do my work. The thought of them all scrambling to get things done made me feel good. I wanted them to know what real work was all about. I wanted them to know just how much they needed me. I wanted them to feel regret for the way that they had treated me. My boss was still standing in front of me, staring curiously at me. I hadn’t said a word. I’d just been staring at the pile of work while all these thoughts ran through my mind.
And then, all of a sudden, everything seemed funny to me, and I started laughing out loud. My boss looked at me as if I actually lost the plot.
“Uh, Holly, did you hear what I said?” he asked.
“That you need these files done by the end of the day? Yeah, I heard you,” I said and chuckled to myself. “Do you know what time I finished on Friday?”
“Friday?”
“Yeah. Do you know what time I finished on Friday?” I said again.
“Uh. No.”
“Of course you don’t. I finished at seven thirty. I was the only one left in here. Have you ever been in the office at that time of the night? It’s kind of eerie. Not something a young woman should have to experience. But I’m such a good worker. I made sure that all the work was done. Even though I’m sure that work shouldn’t have been done by me in the first place. Terry should’ve done it. Isn’t that right?” I said to Terry who had now walked into the room after hearing me talking back to the boss. I noticed a few people had walked in. They weren’t used to me saying so much. I loved the looks on their faces as they took in the scene. “I already had my own pile of work to deal with that day.”
“Well, you should’ve talked to me,” the boss said.
“Oh yeah? And you would’ve told me that I didn’t have to finish the work? That someone should’ve helped me? I honestly doubt that you would’ve said that. No, I’m sorry, but I’m not going to have this work done by the end of the day. I’ve done enough work here. In fact, since I started I’ve done more work than everyone put together. It’s not fair. It’s a pity because I actually enjoyed the work. If you had all been nice to me, I would’ve stayed here for the rest of my working life. But I’m not going to be treated like this any longer.”
“What are you saying?”
I stood up, put my coat on, and handed the pile of work back to my boss. He took it from me and frowned. He seemed at a complete loss for words for the first time in my life.
“I think you know exactly what I am saying. I quit.”
“You quit? You can’t just quit.”
“Well actually, I think you’ll find that I can. I quit.”
I walked out to an office full of shocked faces. Terry was literally standing open-mouthed. I hadn’t raised my voice or made much of a scene. I’d simply stood up for myself. The moment I walked through the doors and breathed in the fresh morning air, I smiled. My dad would’ve been so happy to have witnessed that. For the first time in a long time, I felt proud of myself.