Chapter 28 - Emma
A daugher? I’m dumbstruck. I stand there, mouth hanging open as Elliot’s eyes plead with me.
“I didn’t know,” I say in a hushed voice. I’m embarrassed, ashamed even. I’ve thought the worst of him, and accused him to his face of being a liar and a cheat, and he was talking to his child. The child he had with his wife, who died. If the ground opened up and swallowed me whole right now I wouldn’t complain.
“No one knows,” he responds with a simple shrug. He takes a deep breath and lets it all out, glancing out the doors to the bright sunlight outside.
“I’m sorry,” I finally say. His eyes drift back to mine. They look clear, but I see a deep sadness in him.
“It’s ok,” he responds.
“Not really. I’ve been an ass to you.”
The corner of his lips twitch upwards. “Yeah. For once it wasn’t me.”
I smile. At least we’re on the same page now. I want to move towards him, to wrap my arms around his neck and breathe in his smell and tell him, no, show him how sorry I am. I want to stroke his chest and feel his body against mine but I look at him and I can’t move. We’re both locked in place and all we can do is stare at each other. I’m so embarrassed.
“Do you…” I trail off. “Do you want to grab a coffee or something? We can go to the conference later.” I smile tentatively at him. “I know you probably don’t want to even look at me right now, I’ve been so awful to you.”
He says nothing for a few seconds and then I see his smile creep back towards his face. It starts in his eyes as they crinkle slightly and travels to his lips. It’s the tiniest movement but I can’t help but notice every movement of his face.
“Coffee with you sounds a whole lot better than a conference with a bunch of stuffy doctors.”
I breathe a sigh of relief. “I think I saw a cafe just down the road.”
We head out the sliding glass doors at the front of the hotel and turn down the road. After a few steps I realise that my hand has slipped into his, and we’re walking hand in hand as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. But that’s the thing - it is the most natural thing in the world. It feels right.
We walk in silence for a few moments and I work up the courage to talk again. I use my other hand to brush my unruly hair out of my face.
“So your daughter, how old is she?”
“Ten,” he answers. I glance up and see him grin. “Or ‘almost eleven’ as she always likes to remind me.”
I can’t help but smile.
“Her name is Gracie,” he continues. “She’s so bright sometimes I’m worried she knows too much for her age.” He’s smiling again. It’s like he can’t help himself when he’s thinking about her. My heart melts in my chest and I wait for him to go on. “She’d like you.”
The words make my heart skip a beat. “I’m sure I’d love her,” I reply softly. We get to the corner and see the coffee shop. He opens the glass door for me and I step through. Once we’ve ordered we sit down at a table by the front window. We both stare out at the people walking by. Elliot shifts in his seat and pulls out his phone. He taps on it a few times and then turns it around.
“That’s her.”
I see a picture of Elliot holding a little girl with a huge mane of red hair. Her eyes are sparkling, the same blue eyes as Elliot’s. Her mouth is open wide in a toothy smile, like the picture was snapped in the middle of a laugh. Elliot is looking at her with pure love in his eyes. I glance up from the photo to the man in front of me and smile softly.
“She looks like a firecracker,” I say to him.
“She’s everything to me,” he replies simply and puts his phone in his pocket, going back to looking out the window. We sit like that for a while, looking out the window in silence. I steal a glance his way and realise that it’s one of those natural, comfortable silences. I don’t feel like I need to ask him questions or keep the conversation going. We’re just comfortable being here, together.
“My dad died two months ago,” I blurt out suddenly. Elliot looks towards me, slightly surprised. “It’s been lonely without him. It’s not even like I talked to him every day or anything, but just knowing that he’s gone. Really gone. I don’t know.”
I stop talking and tear my eyes away from his gaze. I don’t know why I told him that. My throat is constricting and I can feel prickling at the corner of my eyes. I will myself not to cry.
“I know what you mean,” he replies. “When Chloe died I thought things would never be right again. For a long time they weren’t.”
I wait for him to go on, to tell me that time heals all or some other platitude but he stops talking. We sip our coffees in silence and I feel like my heart is slowly becoming whole again. It’s scary and exciting, and all I want to do is jump head first into the feeling. I’m sitting with a man that I can talk to. Really talk to. I can be myself and I don’t have to be snarky or sarcastic to be taken seriously.
With him I feel like I can be stripped bare, vulnerable, and he won’t blink an eye. We finish our coffees and stand up together. Walking towards the door, Elliot puts his hand on the small of my back and I lean into his strong body. We step outside and I turn to him, putting my hands on his chest. His muscular arms wrap around me and pull me into him.
Our eyes are locked on each other and nothing else matters. Not the other people on the sidewalk, not the conference we’re supposed to be attending, not the fact that we’re co-workers. We stay like that and the world around us falls away.
His lips dip down and my chip tilts up until his kiss meets mine. Elliot’s lips taste better than they did yesterday, better than any kiss I’ve ever tasted. He pulls me into him and my body fits perfectly into his. My fingers tangle into his hair as our lips interlock. Our bodies fuse together as my lips explore his, crushing together in a passion and intimacy I didn’t know was possible.
My heart is hammering in my chest and I lean into him. He holds me up, supports me, pulls me into his warmth. I never want this to stop, never want to let go of this feeling. This is more than a kiss. With his body pressed up against mine and my arms wrapped around his neck I know for a fact that I’m falling for him.