Chapter 24 - Emma

I wake up gently, still recovering from the orgasm that rocked through my body.  I moan gently as I open my eyes and look over at the clock on the bedside table: nearly 6pm.  I turn around to reach for Elliot and realise I’m alone in bed.  I frown.  I remember his arms wrapped around me, his legs crossed between mine.  Our bodies were completely fused as we fell into a deep sleep after coming together.  

Maybe he’s gone to get some food, or just in the bathroom.  I stretch out on the silky sheets, loving how soft the pillows are.  This is definitely nicer than my apartment at home.  At least there are some perks to working at a prestigious plastic surgery office - business class flights and luxury hotels are definitely something I could get used to.

I sigh, completely content.  I don’t remember the last time I came that hard, or the last time sex felt so… intimate.  It’s crazy, because I hardly know him.  But it was like we knew where to touch each other, where to look, what to say, what not to say.  His eyes devoured me and made me feel like a goddess, his hands were hungry as they roamed all over my body.  And his cock, well.  I sigh again.  

Elliot’s voice drifts through the thin wall separating the bathroom with the bedroom.  I get up lightly and take a few steps towards the door.  His voice filters through a bit more clearly and his words make my heart sink like a rock.

“I love you babygirl, you know that right?”

What did he just say?!

“I’ll be home soon and I promise we’ll go have a fun night out together.  I know how much you like ice cream.”  He chuckles.  He chuckles?!  The ice king, the jerk, the impenetrable fortress of non-emotion… he loves her?!  She’s making him laugh?! Ice cream dates?!

The jealousy rips through me like a freight train.  Melodie’s face pops into my head and I wonder if it’s her on the other end of the line.  I feel dizzy and weak, like my limbs are suddenly full of pins and needles.  My dress is still near the door.  I slip it on quietly and gather the rest of my things.  Thank goodness my room is on this floor, only a few doors down.  I take  a quick look around the room and slip out the door, closing it quietly behind me.  Almost running barefoot down the hallway, I make it to my own room and rush inside.  I drop the shoes and purse and underwear in my hands and let out a massive sigh.

The tears are already welling up inside me.  I knew I shouldn’t trust him!  Of course he would use me, he’s been nothing but rude to me ever since I met him.  And now we’ve gone away together and the first chance he has he tries it on with me.  Like a fool, as soon as he changes his tune I’m all over him.  I feel so much shame, embarrassment, I feel… pathetic.  The new girl who just couldn’t resist spreading her legs at the first opportunity.  Great.

How could I be so stupid.  I actually thought he was different, there was more to him.  I thought the asshole thing was just an act.  My sobs start in the depths of my stomach and erupt through my throat.  I’m not the girl that gets played.  I’m not the girl that gets attached.  How could I put myself in this situation?!  I’m the one who makes guys come to me.

Suddenly I’m on my knees, hands over my face.  I’m crying like I’ve never cried before.  The stress of the past few months is hitting me all at once and wave after wave of despair washes over me.  I did this to myself.  This job was the one chance I had of making my debts legitimate, of taking away the threat of scar-faced Victor coming after me and I’ve ruined it.  I’ve made a fool of myself and if the whole office doesn’t already know, I’m sure they will soon.

I think of Dave, who got me the job.  He vouched for me in front of his boss and now not only will I be the office fool but he will too for bringing me in.  I’m still on my knees and I fall to the side, letting my back rest on the wall as my tears drop down my face to the floor.  

He’s made a fool of me.  Me.  The silly girl who just wanted a bit of attention.  Oh God, I’m so embarrassed.  What a dirty, cheating, lying, son of a bitch!  The minute he leaves New York, leaves his girlfriend or wife or whatever, he’s all over me.  I can’t believe he played me like that.  And I ate it all up, like an idiot.  I loved the attention, loved the way he looked at me and touched me.  As if I was special, as if he cared about me.  

My chest feels like it’s splitting in two and my body feels weaker than it’s ever felt before.  I don’t know if I can even get up off the floor, so I stay there, collapsed.  I’ve been a fool.