CHAPTER NINETEEN
“Fuck.” Beck’s breath rushed out with the curse.
He lifted his arm, hoping Cal would get the hint, and he did, because a second later, without breaking the kiss, Cal circled Beck’s wrists to hold him in place.
Beck let his head drop back against the wall as Cal ground against him. By the time Cal pulled away, Beck was nearly as wet as he was. But no way did he look as good as Cal with his soaked gray T-shirt clinging to every ridge and dip of his chest and abs.
When he looked up, Cal was watching him. “So you really have a thing for wet, dirty farm boys?”
Beck felt heat rush to his cheeks. “You gonna exploit it?”
“Hell yeah.” Cal leaned in for another kiss but pulled back suddenly, shaking his head. “Shit.”
“What’s wrong?”
“No fucking lube out here.”
“Oh.” Beck had really gotten into the idea of fucking in the barn.
Cal chewed his lip for a second and then said, “You trust me?”
Beck’s pulse accelerated. “Yes. I think so.”
“Then turn around.”
“Cal?”
“Turn the fuck around. You wanted me in charge, and that’s what you’re going to get.”
Beck did want that. So very much.
And when he didn’t move fast enough, Cal grabbed his hips and spun him. “Now drop your pants.”
“Cal, I—”
He leaned in close. “If you really want me to stop, say red, okay?”
Beck shivered. “Okay.”
“Good. Now do what I said.”
Beck unfastened his pants with shaky hands and then pushed them and his boxers down.
“Perfect.”
Beck heard a thump. When he looked over his shoulder, Cal was on his knees. He pulled Beck’s ass cheeks apart and blew warm breath over his hole.
“Holy fuck!”
Cal sank his teeth into Beck’s ass cheek, making him gasp. Was he really going to…?
He swiped his tongue over Beck’s hole.
“Oh. My. God.”
Cal chuckled against his sensitive skin, making Beck squirm.
“Please. Don’t stop.” A few months ago, if anyone had told him he’d be begging Cal McMurtry to stick his tongue up his ass, he would’ve thought them crazy.
Cal teased him, circling, stabbing at his hole with the tip of his tongue but never pushing in.
“Caaaaaal!”
“Tell me what you want.”
“I…”
He pulled harder on Beck’s ass cheeks to open him up more, then swiped the flat of his tongue over Beck’s pucker.
“Fuck!” Beck arched his back, trying to give Cal better access.
“Talk to me, Beck. Tell me every dirty thing you want.”
“Cal, I… I want your tongue in my ass.”
“Mmm. Tell me more.”
Beck couldn’t do anything but give in. “I want you to tongue-fuck me, to soak me in your spit, to eat me until I can’t stand it anymore.”
“So fucking hot,” Cal murmured just before he shoved his tongue right up Beck’s ass.
Beck bit down on the fleshy part of his hand below his thumb, stifling a loud cry.
A few moments later, Cal stopped long enough to say, “There’s no one around. You don’t have to be so quiet.”
Cal gave him no mercy. He licked, teased, and then tongue-fucked him with short stabs and then deeper, slower thrusts, and soon Beck was shouting his name, crying out, whining, begging, and trying to push back, needing more, so much more.
Cal reached around and took Beck’s cock in his hand, stroking him faster and faster.
“I’m gonna come, Cal. I can’t hold back. I—”
He sat back and squeezed the base of Beck’s cock.
“Bastard!”
Cal laughed. “I’m making you wait because I want you so fucking worked up, you don’t care that I’m fucking you with nothing but my spit for lube.”
Why did that sound so goddamn hot?
A few moments later, Cal began to stroke his cock again, slowly at first. Then he leaned in close and licked Beck’s ass again before driving his tongue in as far as it would go. In no time Beck was writhing and babbling nonsense.
He was right on the edge again when Cal stopped.
“Fuck me, Cal. I can’t take this.”
“That’s right. You need what I can give you. You don’t care about anything but getting fucked right now, do you?”
“No!” He needed Cal’s cock in him. He’d deal with any pain it took to get it.
He felt the loss of Cal’s heat and turned around. “I’m coming back, don’t worry. I’ve got to get a condom from here.” He held up his wallet.
Beck watched him roll it on, trying to catch his breath, but his cock ached and his ass felt much too empty. Had he ever been this desperate for a man?
Cal moved behind him, his cock sheathed now. “I’ll go slow. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“No.” Beck needed Cal inside him, and he needed it right now. “I don’t care if it hurts.”
Cal growled and pushed in.
Beck sucked in his breath and sank his teeth into his lower lip. Fuck, that burned.
Cal pulled out, and Beck tensed as he thrust again, trying to work himself in a little deeper.
“Shhh. Easy.” Cal nuzzled him and kissed his neck. “Just relax. It’s going to be fine.”
Cal talked to him like he would a skittish horse. Maybe he should be insulted, but he wasn’t. Cal’s voice was low and sexy, and when he started stroking Beck’s cock and toying with his balls, Beck forgot all about the burning pain in his ass.
Eventually, he relaxed, and Cal sank deeper. Working him with slow, careful strokes, Cal got Beck to take his full length.
“Can’t hold back much longer,” Cal said.
Beck’s ass burned, and it was making him so fucking hot, he thought he would combust. He wasn’t usually into pain, but something about that day, the storm, Cal’s aggression, fucking in a barn, it all felt fucking perfect.
“Cal?”
“Yes?”
“Don’t go easy with me anymore. I want you to fuck me like you don’t care, like you don’t know how to be gentle.”
“Beck, I—”
“Do it, Cal. I want you to let go.” Beck pushed back and squeezed Cal’s cock with his ass.
“Jesus, Beck.”
“Fuck. Me. Now.”
Cal broke then. He slid almost all the way out and then slammed back in, jolting Beck against the wall. Fuck. Beck had asked for this; now he hoped to God he could take it.
Cal drove into him over and over. Beck’s hands slipped and he struggled for purchase, so Cal wrapped an arm around his waist and held him tight as he used his other arm to haul Beck against his chest. He kept working himself in and out in shallow strokes, which was all their position would allow.
“You’re mine,” he said. “I’m going to own your ass.”
“Yes, Cal! Fuck yes! Take me!”
Cal stumbled forward until he had Beck pressed flat against the stall door. He braced his hands on either side of him for leverage and then let go, fucking him mercilessly.
Beck’s knees buckled, but Cal’s weight and the force of his thrusts held him up.
“Take it, Beck, take every inch.”
“Yes! Make me yours. No more bullshit. You know you want to own me.”
***
Cal pulled out, grabbed Beck’s arm, and dragged him into an empty stall lined with fresh straw. “Stay there. I’ll be right back.”
Beck sagged against the wall and nodded.
Cal was only gone a few seconds. When he came back, he had a blanket which he spread on the floor. “Hands and knees now.”
“No.”
Cal growled, in no mood for defiance.
Beck stretched out on his back and pulled his legs up, exposing himself. “I want to see you.”
“Fuck yes.” Cal had no problem with that. He dropped to his knees, and as soon as he got into position, he shoved back inside that tight ass. Beck hooked his legs over his shoulders, and Cal went at him hard.
Then Beck surprised him by shoving at his shoulders and rolling them until he was on top. He straddled Cal, working himself up and down, in long, slow strokes.
Cal’s cock almost came free from his body, and he took hold of Beck’s hips. “Stop teasing me.”
“Maybe I want to go slow.”
Cal shook his head. “You’re not in charge here.”
“Oh really? I don’t think either of us is in control right now. I think—”
Cal thrust up, filling him completely. Beck dropped his head back. “Fuck, that’s good.”
“Damn right it is.”
Beck rode him with abandon then, and Cal held on to his hips, driving up as hard as he could so their bodies slammed together.
Beck took his cock in his hands and stroked it. His face was flushed, his pupils dilated.
“That’s it. Come for me. Cover me in it,” Cal demanded.
“Fuck yes, Cal!” Beck came so hard, his seed hit Cal’s chin.
Cal fought to hold back as Beck wrung himself dry. Then he flipped them again. He pushed at Beck’s legs until they were doubled on his chest and went at him with deep, hard strokes.
“So close. So fucking close!” He pulled out, shucked the condom, and fisted his cock. One stroke. Another and then he was coming, spattering Beck’s abs and his still half-hard cock. God, he loved the sight of Beck all come-covered.
Beck’s eyes widened as he looked down at his chest. “Wow.”
“I needed to mark my territory.”
Beck grinned. “Just don’t pee on me next.”
Cal laughed. “I won’t go that far.”
“You’d probably make me like it if you did.”
“Yeah, I’d do just about anything with you.” Anything except admit exactly how much he cared.
As they lay there, trying to catch their breath, Cal realized the storm had stopped. Or at least the one outside had. The one inside of him was still raging. Coming had only slightly diminished its strength. He wanted Beck, not just for a few more months of crazy-hot sex, but for conversation and companionship and all those fucking things a relationship was supposed to give a person. All those things Cal couldn’t have unless he put his farm at risk, or sold it and moved.
Was he actually going to consider tagging after Beck to wherever he moved? Would Beck even want him to?
Beck brushed his fingers over Cal’s cheek. “You okay?”
“I should be asking you that. I took you really seriously when you said don’t hold back.”
Beck smiled. “I’m fine.” But when he rolled to his back, he winced. “Okay, I’m sore, but as I’ve told you, Cal, I like rough.”
Cal propped himself up on his elbow. “What else do you like?”
Beck’s cheeks reddened.
“We just joked about watersports; surely you’re not going to get embarrassed now.”
“If it’s so easy to tell your fantasies, then you go first.”
Cal shook his head. “Nope. I’m the one who asked.”
Cal loved teasing Beck, bantering with him like this. He would miss that as much as he would miss fucking when Beck was gone. Before Beck came back to town, he hadn’t thought of himself as lonely, at least not most of the time. Only occasionally at night, when the house felt big and empty. But now… He’d miss Beck every second.
Cal sat up and looked around for his clothes. “We should get dressed. Now that the storm is over, someone could—”
“I like to be told what to do, in bed or…in a barn. I like to be told to stay still, or put my hands up, or get on my knees. I like to be controlled.”
Cal wouldn’t have thought it possible, but his cock hardened again. He forgot all about getting dressed. “I like to give orders.”
“Yeah, I thought you did.”
Fuck, it was like Beck was made for him.
“You know what else I like?”
“What?” Cal didn’t know if he could bear to hear it.
“Looking in a man’s eyes as he comes.”
Heat filled Cal’s cheeks. “Yeah, I like it too, but it’s so…personal.”
Beck snorted. “Your cock is up the guy’s ass, but looking at him is too personal?”
“But he can see you then, see too much.” Cal turned away, not sure he could continue the conversation. “The rain’s stopped, so we—”
Beck cupped Cal’s chin and turned Cal to face him.
“I’m not going to demand more from you than you can give. I understand your situation, and I’m sorry if I’ve pushed too hard.”
Cal wanted to change, to give their relationship a chance. “I wish…”
“What?”
Cal shook his head. “Never mind. Come on. We should get dressed.”
He held out a hand to Beck, pulled him to his feet. Then he grabbed the blanket, and they stepped from the stall just as Mrs. Johnson walked through the barn door.
“Oh my Lord.” She screamed and ran from the barn like it was on fire.
Cal grabbed his pants and yanked them on. Then he raced toward the door as he pulled his shirt over his head. He had to catch her before she left so he could convince her that this wasn’t what she thought, even if the reality was much worse than anything she could have imagined.
“Mrs. Johnson! Mrs. Johnson! Wait!”
She opened her car door and used it like a shield as she turned to face him. “I do not intend to spend any more time here than is absolutely necessary. I wouldn’t be here at all if you’d brought my eggs to me this afternoon.”
Shit. In the midst of the storm, he’d forgotten all about the deliveries. “We were under a tornado watch.”
She sniffed. “Be that as it may, I thought you could be counted on to behave decently, even though you are…one of those.”
“One of those?” Cal knew what she was getting at, but he wanted to make her say it.
“Gays or whatever you call yourself these days.”
Stay calm. “You surprised us. I’m very sorry not to have been dressed when you came in.”
“You were in a barn. Do you normally go about your barn naked?”
So what if he did? It was his barn. “I got soaked in the storm. I was changing.”
“In the barn?”
“No point in tracking water through the house. I’m sorry for startling you, but—”
“You’re certainly right you startled me. In there naked with that Beckett Davis. We all knew you’d take up with him sooner or later, and it’s already been proven he’s not fit to be around children.”
Oh, hell no. “He won the suit against the school, proving that he was an excellent teacher and the school was in the wrong. They offered to keep him on.”
“Damn liberal courts. What do you expect? I thought you had the decency not to act on those unnatural urges of yours. I hate seeing that I was wrong. You can cancel my orders from here on out.”
“So you expect me to remain celibate?” Cal should’ve just let her go, but he was damn tired of this attitude and he was fucked now anyway.
“I certainly don’t expect you to throw it in my face.”
“Throw it in your face? You walked into my barn unannounced. You could’ve called. You could’ve knocked. This is my property, and you have the nerve to come here and tell me I don’t deserve to have a relationship, that I’m just supposed to stop myself from loving someone because that doesn’t fit your definition of what’s right?”
Loving? Did he love Beck?
Yeah, he did.
“It’s not my definition,” Mrs. Johnson spat. “It’s God’s.”
“So if I’d been in there with a woman—”
“It would still be a sin if you weren’t married.”
“And of course you don’t think I can marry Beck.”
“The Bible says marriage is between a man and a woman.”
“And probably a few other women and only if her father bribes the man with enough goats. I have actually read the Bible.”
“You see here, Calvin McMurtry. What would your mama say?”
“She’d be proud of me for finally standing up for myself.” That was true. His family wasn’t perfect, but they loved him.
“Hmpf! I guess I can’t expect any better since she stopped going to church.”
“She stopped going to get away from all you bigots.”
“Well, I never. I’m leaving.”
“Good. I don’t want to see you on my property again.”
She slammed the car door and almost hit the fence in her haste to turn around.
“Good riddance!” Cal yelled after her. It had felt so damn good to tell the old bitch off, but he was going to regret it, possibly for the rest of his life.
He turned to see Beck watching him wide-eyed. “That was amazing!”
Cal shook his head. “No, it was stupid as hell.”
Tears stung the back of his eyes. He’d ruined everything for nothing more than the pleasure of telling someone off. He couldn’t take it back now. He’d gone way too far to be able to fix this. And on top of that, he’d finally admitted to himself he’d fallen in love with Beck.
Beck took a few steps toward him.
But Cal held up a hand, praying he could speak without his voice breaking. “I-I’m sorry. I just need to be alone right now.”
“Cal?”
Beck called after him, but he was already running for the house as if he could outrun all the emotions threatening to tear him apart.