18
For a while after the two of them enjoyed each other's bodies. Drew gazed at Sarah with great ardour. Never before had he seen anyone so beautiful, so lovely, nor had he experienced the feelings that trembled inside his heart. It was strange for him to admit so because she was English, but she was everything he dreamed of.
His leg gradually got better, and he was able to put weight on it. Some time after they made love Sarah grew quite modest, covering up her femininity by putting her clothes on again.
“Are ye sure ye hae tae dae that, lass?” Drew asked with a smirk. Sarah smiled, and rolled her bottom lip under her teeth. Drew didn't know why, but the way she acted so coy only served to drive him even crazier with desire. He wrapped his kilt around his waist and pushed himself up over to her, taking her in his arms again in a loving kiss.
“I must. You do not understand what I've been through. I cannot risk Lord Flynn finding me,” she said. “But I am glad I have met a man like you, someone who has proven to me that not all men are cruel.”
“Was he really that bad?” Drew asked. Sarah's face turned to the ground, not wanting to think about all the things he had done.
“He scolded me, belittled me, released his temper on me. When he punished people the punishments were humiliating. He struck fear into my heart. That was why I left. I could not bear to live a life with him.”
“I am glad ye were here, and nae just because ye saved my life, although I wish ye did nae hae tae run because ye were being mistreated,” he said softly, looking at her earnestly. Then, anger flashed in his eyes. “And I will make him pay for the way he treated ye.”
“I am glad too,” Sarah said, then doubt flickered in her eyes. “But what are we to do now? The world is ours, Drew. We could run away and leave the war behind. We don't have to think about Lord Flynn anymore.”
Drew hung his head.
“I cannae dae that, lass. I cannae turn my back on my clan. But I know ye might nae want tae return with me. If ye need tae go and be safe I'll understand. He must be punished for his crimes, and I will be the one who punishes him.”
“I don't want to be anywhere other than with you,” Sarah said, the words rushing out of her mouth. She clutched Drew's hand desperately.
“Then ye'll stay,” he said, “but I hae tae go back.”
“I understand,” Sarah said, looking in the vague direction of the south, where the rolling hills and wide fields of England lay.
“Dae ye truly want tae leave your home?”
“There's nothing there for me,” Sarah said, more than a hint of sadness in her voice.
As soon as Drew felt ready to return to battle he prepared the horse and got ready to get underway. The closer they got to leaving the sadder he was that he had to leave this place. It was good for a time to be able to forget about his responsibilities and leave the world behind, to lose himself in the arms of this woman, but his duty called him. He only hoped that it wasn't too late.
Sarah wrapped her arms around his waist as he guided the horse back to the battlefield. They galloped at breakneck speed through the forest. Drew's warrior blood was boiling again now, needing to be with his clan as they fought the English.
He tried not to think about what would happen when he came back with Sarah. It was already bad enough that Blair had taken an English woman, but with the both of them? Things were already tense enough, and in some ways Drew felt as though he was betraying his clan for falling in love with Sarah. Especially after he had been so adamantly against Rosemary and Blair's relationship.
But Blair had been right. When the heart beat fiercely it was important to listen, and Drew knew that Sarah was important to him. He had never felt more alive, more complete, than in that glade with her. It was almost strange how someone he had only known for a day could make such a profound impact, but she had saved his life, in more ways than one.
Soon enough they returned to the battlefield. The cries of war greeted their ears long before their eyes ever saw anything. Drew pushed the horse on, not wanting to waste any more time as he knew it could be the difference between life and death for his clansmen.
The trees thinned and they were soon able to see the battle in all its ugly glory. Bodies lay strewn over the field, the green grass dark, soaked with the blood of thousands of men. There was a heavy stench of death hanging over the field, and although the sun shone just as brightly in the glade there was a heavy sadness about it. The sound of clashing steel rang through the air, breaking the silence, and it was a world away from the solitude they had enjoyed in the glade.
From a cursory glance, it seemed obvious the Highlanders were winning.
“What a sight,” Drew said, gazing out at all the dead English. Sarah was silent. He heard her sob. “I'm sorry, lass. I dinnae mean anything by it,” he said, then turned the horse around back to the Scottish camp.
Drew's return was heralded with a greet cheer. The Highlanders were in good spirits. The wounded were getting treatment and sharing ale, enjoying the victory. They raised their glasses to him as he returned.
“Blair will be pleased!” Declan said.
“Is my brother still alive?”
“Oh yes, fighting like a tempest. And who is this ye hae brought back wi' ye?”
Drew tossed a look over his shoulder. Suddenly he felt very self-conscious.
“A lass I met in the woods.”
“Oh aye, I see why ye hae taken a break from war,” Declan said, winking. The young man had obviously been drinking too much ale. Drew flushed with embarrassment. “And what is your name, lass?”
“Sarah.”
Drew cringed as she spoke. Declan's eyes went wide as he heard her English accent. His brow furrowed and his expression changed entirely. He looked at Drew, daggers in his eyes.
“Are ye as mad as your brother? What are ye hoping tae dae? Cannae ye see what will happen? I thought ye were different, Drew. I thought ye were loyal. Ye talk us out of challenging Blair then at the first sign ye betray us tae. I cannae believe ye would dae this,” Declan said, shocked.
“It's nae what it looks like. She's a prisoner of war,” he said. The words were out of his mouth before he'd even thought about them. Declan was placated, but he felt great shame in his heart. Sarah gasped. He could feel her pain without even looking. It was as though now that the two of them had made love they were bonded, sharing a heart, sharing a soul.
Drew quickly left Declan and rode to the main heart of the camp.
As soon as the horse had steadied Sarah alighted and went to move away. Drew jumped down, bracing the pain in his leg to stop her as quickly as he could. He grabbed her arm and pulled her back. She looked distraught. Her eyes were red and tears dripped down her cheeks. Drew recoiled in shame.
“Sarah...” he began.
“Don't. Don't say anything,” she said, tearing his hand away from her. “I can't believe you'd do this, Drew. If you knew all that I had been through...if you knew what I'd done to get here, and I threw it all away because I thought you loved me. I'm such a fool. I'm such a fool.”
“Nay, lass, ye are not a fool.”
“Yes I am. You never loved me. You never meant all those things you said. You're just as bad as I've always believed, as everyone has always said. You're a typical Highlander, taking what you want and then casting things aside. How could you do this, even after I told you what happened to my parents? Now you're going to make a prisoner of me? Well you might as well just kill me. Put me out of my misery. That's all I want anymore. I don't want to live. It hurts too much.”
Her voice trembled with emotion. The strength and tone of her words caught the attention of everyone around. Drew stood firmly, pressing his lips together.
“Calm down, lass.”
“Don't tell me to calm down!” she cried. “How dare you! How dare you treat me this way. I may not be a noble, but that doesn't mean you get to treat me this way. I was a fool to think this was ever going to bring me happiness. We're from two different worlds. I don't belong here. I don't belong with you.”
In a storm of tears Sarah was ready to leave, ready to storm away from the camp, but Drew couldn't let her. Seeing her like this made him feel small, and despite what it meant for the clan he knew that he wanted to be with her, and have her by his side. He limped up to her and placed a hand on her arm. This time she did not shirk it.
“I'm sorry, lass. I'm truly sorry from the pit of my heart. I did nae mean what I said. I spoke without thinking. I should hae been more careful with my words. I dinnae want ye tae think that I was lying. What happened between us, everything I said, I meant. I did nae know what love meant before I met ye. Ye saved my life. Ye showed me that I cannae hate all English, and ye opened my eyes to something new. Ye are not a prisoner. I am the prisoner, Sarah. Ye hae my heart.”
Sarah calmed. Her liquid eyes stared at him. She swallowed down her feelings and exhaled deeply, trying to keep her voice steady and even.
“Do you speak the truth?” she asked.
Drew took her hands in his and gazed into her eyes. He placed her hands on his heart.
“I dae,” he said, smiling at her. Sarah's lips twitched into a smile. It was the sweetest sight Drew had ever seen, and he knew in that moment that he wanted to continue making her smile forever.
Suddenly, Sarah seemed to become aware that all eyes were on her. She bowed her head demurely and wiped the tears from her eyes. There were still many things Drew did not know about her, but one of the things he could tell was that she did not like being the center of attention. Drew cleared his throat and pulled her away to a private tent that had been erected. Before he did so, he told a messenger to run out onto the battlefield and tell Blair that he had returned, and that he was safe and well.
“I feel so foolish,” Sarah said.
“I am the fool. I should nae hae said what I did. I did nae mean tae make ye think ye are less than ye are. I will never dae that again.”
“This is a complicated situation. But I don't understand, what did that man mean when he said that you were as bad as your brother?”
“Did I nae tell ye? My brother Blair returned with an English lass recently when he was out hunting. Much of the clan did nae like that. There were some who plotted against him. I managed tae stop it, and in truth I did nae approve either. Choosing an English lass disnae look good tae our people, especially when we are in a war.”
“You mean there's another girl like me here?” Sarah said, her eyes lighting up.
“Aye, at least, I believe she came with Blair.”
“What's her name?”
Drew scratched his beard.
“I dinnae know if that's the best idea. People may think the two of ye are plotting. It might be best if ye stay out of sight for a wee while.”
Sarah stepped forward and looked at Drew pointedly.
“I am alone here, Drew. If there is another English girl I am going to talk with her because she is the only person who truly knows what I am going through. I am not going to stay out of sight just because your clan doesn't like the thought of me being here. That's treating me like a prisoner, and we've already made it clear that I'm not one of those.”
She spoke with real fire in her belly, and Drew was impressed.
“Ye hae changed from when we first met. Then ye would nae speak at all, but now ye are saying what is truly on your mind.”
“I suppose you must be rubbing off on me,” she teased. Then she grew more serious again. “Please Drew, tell me her name. I wish to speak with her.”
Drew sighed, knowing that he wasn't able to deny Sarah her request.
“Her name is Rosemary, although I cannae tell ye where she is in the camp.”
“Rosemary? Did you say Rosemary?” Sarah asked, her face white as a sheet.
“Aye,” Drew replied, and before he could ask anything else Sarah was already out of the tent and running through camp screaming Rosemary's name.