Chapter One

Avery

I tossed my jacket on the twin-size bed in my rented room and flopped down on top of it. I had to find a job. I could not be one of those statistics. I had put in my time, paid my dues, and had a shiny new bachelor’s degree and no job. Go to college, they said. You’ll make lots of money, they said.

“Ha! You have to get a job first!”

“What, dear?” Sally said, stopping at my open door.

I sat up, ran a hand through my short pixie cut, and sighed. “Nothing. Another job interview and another no. They said I didn’t have enough experience. How could I have experience? I’ve been in college for five years.”

She gave me a soft smile and came to sit beside me on the bed. “It will happen, dear. Give it time. You’ve only been looking for a month.”

“It shouldn’t be so hard. I went into accounting and business because that’s something people will always need. Money makes the world go around,” I said.

Sally put a hand on my knee. “There’s no rush for you to move out. You just graduated. Give yourself a break.”

I rubbed my hands over my face. “This is not what I had planned for myself. I envisioned graduating on Saturday and starting a new job on Monday, making lots of money and being unbelievably successful.”

“You’re still young. You have plenty of time to find a job.”

I ignored her, too caught up in my self-pity. “I’m twenty-five. Nobody is going to hire someone who took seven years to get a bachelor’s degree.”

Sally chuckled. “It didn’t take seven years. You took some time off. You enjoyed life. That’s what young people do.”

“I wished I would have gone straight to school and stayed there. It didn’t help that I changed majors. I probably look flighty. They don’t want to trust their books to a woman who couldn’t figure out if she wanted to be a scientist, an artist, or an accountant.”

“You’re a spirited woman. That isn’t a bad thing. Give it time. You young people are always in such a hurry these days,” she scolded.

I laughed. It was something Sally, my old—literally old—friend and landlady, said to me all the time. I had been renting a room in her house for the past year. She charged me next to nothing, claiming she should pay me to stay there since I kept her company.

“I don’t want to keep taking advantage of your hospitality, Sally.”

She smiled. “You pay me. That isn’t taking advantage.”

I laughed. “I pay you next to nothing, and you take care of me.”

“I enjoy it, sweetie. I really do.”

“Well, I hope to have my own place someday. I will miss you like crazy, but I will visit every minute I can,” I promised her.

She sighed. “I hope you do. There is no rush for you to go. I do understand, though. It’s exciting to have your own place and to get to walk around your house naked.”

“Sally!”

She giggled like a woman a third her age. “I’m not so old. I used to be a hot little number back when I was your age. Strut it while you got it.”

I laughed at her mention of her wild side. It was hard to imagine the prim and proper Sally ever doing anything scandalous.

My phone rang. I looked at the screen and didn’t recognize the number. I almost didn’t answer it. Something told me I should.

“Hello?”

“Is this Avery?”

“Yes. Who’s this?”

The woman on the other end of the phone didn’t immediately answer.

“Do you know Tracy Colter?”

Dread washed over me. “Yes. Why? What’s going on? Is she okay?”

The woman cleared her throat. “I’m with the county hospital. You are her only emergency contact in her phone.”

“The hospital?”

“Yes, ma’am. I’m a doctor here at the hospital. I’m sorry to inform you that Tracy passed away a short time ago.”

My knees felt weak. I could feel blood rushing to my feet and followed the blood flow, falling onto the bed.

“What is it?” Sally whispered.

I turned to look at her. I couldn’t speak.

“Ma’am, are you there?” the voice said on the other end of the phone.

My mouth was so dry I couldn’t pry my tongue off the roof of my mouth. I handed the phone to Sally, who quickly took over the call. I listened from someplace far away as Sally talked with the doctor. I heard her say the name Iris and felt a fresh wave of grief wash over me.

Sally put the phone down and threw her arms around me. “I’m so sorry, hon.”

“I don’t understand,” I managed to get out.

Sally took a deep breath. “Tracy was in a car accident. She was semi-conscious for a short time. She told the doctors to call you. She wanted you to pick up her baby.”

“She died?” I asked, knowing the answer, but my brain refused to accept it. “Iris is alive?”

“I’m sorry, dear, but she did. She was rushed to surgery, but her wounds were too severe. The baby wasn’t in the car.”

“She’s dead,” I repeated.

“Hon, I’ll drive you. We need to go pick up the baby from daycare,” Sally said softy.

I nodded. “Iris.”

“Yes, Iris.”

“Oh my god, she’s dead,” I said, more to myself than anything.

I realized I wasn’t crying. That surprised me. I should have been crying.

“I’ll get my purse. Does she leave the car seat at the daycare?” Sally asked.

I slowly shook my head. “It would have been in the car. We need to get one somehow. Can you please take care of it?”

Sally mumbled something and left the room. I sat on the bed, staring at the wall, trying to process all the information.

“Jake,” I whispered.

Sally had come back into the room. “Who?”

“Jake. Tracy’s older brother. I have to call him.”

“We will, dear. Let’s get the baby,” Sally said calmly.

I followed her out the door and climbed into the passenger seat of her big Cadillac. I felt lost as I sat back and let Sally navigate. She pulled up in front of a Walmart.

“What are we doing here?” I asked.

“I figured we better pick up a few things.”

I sat in the car and watched her walk inside. She was back within minutes, a young man pushing a full cart behind her.

She opened the door to the back seat. The man helped her open the box containing a car seat. A few more bags were put in the trunk, and then we were off again.

“I’m still in shock,” I said, I can’t tell you how grateful I am for your help.”

She smiled. “Yes, dear. I wanted to make sure we could take her home.”

I nodded. “Thank you. I’ll pay you back.”

She shushed me and listened to the navigation system as it guided her to the daycare. I wasn’t in any state to tell her the directions. I took a few minutes to collect myself before I went inside to pick up my beautiful goddaughter. Sally went with me. We asked to speak to whoever was in charge and informed them of the tragedy.

Iris was packed up, and I took Iris in my arms and hugged her tightly before I put her into the car seat. I sat in front, listening to Iris gurgle and bat at the toy Sally had also purchased to hang over the car seat. I’d had no idea Sally was so baby savvy. I was in no condition to think straight.

Once I put little Iris down for a nap, Sally pulled me into the kitchen and said we had to talk.

“Avery, hon, you were listed as Tracy’s emergency contact.”

I nodded. “I knew that. She was mine. Neither of us had any real family to speak of and had decided we could trust one another.”

“Dear, you said she had a brother?”

“Yes, Jake. I forgot. I need to tell Jake. Would the hospital or police have notified him?”

Sally cleared her throat. “I’m not sure. I believe it would be wise for you to reach out to him in case they didn’t. You said she was estranged from her family?” she gently prodded.

“Her parents are dead. Jake is the only family she has. He lives in Silicon Valley, San Francisco area or something. I don’t know for sure. He’s a very wealthy guy. He built some computer program or something,” I said, waving a hand. I did not want to talk about Jake.

“Okay. Let me see if I can track him down. If he doesn’t come back or make arrangements, it is up to you to make the funeral arrangements,” Sally said.

I looked at her in horror. “What? I can’t do that!”

Sally smiled. “You can. We need to contact a funeral home. Then tomorrow we can go by and take care of the details. Did Tracy have a life insurance policy?”

I shrugged, shaking my head. “I don’t know. This can’t be real. Tracy is only twenty-five. She can’t be dead!” I wailed, and for the first time since I heard the news, I cried. It was as if a dam broke. My tears flowed, and I was helpless to stop them. My throat felt raw and my chest was tight by the time I ran out of tears.

Sally brought me some hot tea spiked with Irish liquor and ordered me to drink. It soothed my throat and helped calm me. I knew the calming was from the alcohol and was grateful for it.

“I’ll look up Jake’s name, but can you call him?” I asked Sally in a calm, quiet voice. “We aren’t exactly friends. I don’t want to talk to him right now.”

“Of course, dear.”

I went to grab my laptop and checked on Iris, who was still sound asleep, before heading back to the kitchen. I Googled Jake and did my best to ignore his picture that popped up. I jotted down the number and gave it to Sally. Then it was time to look for funeral homes in the area.

I had no idea which to pick and went with my gut, quickly making the call for them to pick up Tracy from the hospital.

“I need to go to Tracy’s apartment,” I said.

Sally nodded. “Yes, you do. Would you like me to go with you?”

I shook my head. “No, but could you watch Iris? I need to grab some of her things and check to see if Tracy had a will. I know she didn’t, but I’ll check anyway.”

“Okay. We’ll be fine. Take your time, hon.”

I pulled up my Uber app, ordered a car, and waited. It still didn’t feel real.

When I walked through the door of her apartment, I could feel her. I fought back the tears that threatened to fall. I checked the small desk in the living room and didn’t find a will. I did find a burial policy.

“Smart girl,” I whispered, feeling a little better to have the money to properly bury her.

I grabbed her suitcase out of the closet, taking a moment to run my hand over Tracy’s dresses hanging there, before heading to Iris’s room and packing clothing. I picked up the open pack of diapers and some of the bedding from the crib, hoping to make Iris feel comfortable. Then it was to the kitchen to grab the cans of formula and clean bottles.

I smiled when I saw the small pile of dishes in the sink. I didn’t know why, but I stopped my packing and quickly washed them. I knew she would never know, but I couldn’t leave them. If Jake didn’t come back, it would be up to me to clean out the apartment. I wasn’t sure I could do that. Touching Tracy’s things felt a bit like a violation of her privacy.

The funeral home called while I was on my way home. The director wanted to set a date and time for the funeral. I felt pressured into making a quick decision, and before I knew what was happening, I had agreed to a Friday afternoon funeral.

My stomach was a jumble of knots by the time I returned to Sally’s. I told her what I did, and she smiled before giving me a quick hug.

“It’s okay, dear. I haven’t called Jake yet. Iris woke up. I gave her a bottle, and she went right back down to sleep.”

“Thank you, Sally. I brought some of Iris’s things. I’m glad she is young enough not to understand what’s happening. That poor baby is never going to know how much her mommy loved her,” I said, choking on the last words.

“Go sit. I’ll make that phone call and let the man know the funeral is on Friday. If he plans to be involved in the planning, he’ll need to talk with you or make the arrangements himself,” she said.

“I found a burial policy,” I said quietly.

“Good. We’ll take that with us to the funeral home tomorrow. They will know what to do with it.”

I nodded, thankful I had Sally to lean on. The poor woman had lost her husband and both her sisters. She was well-versed in funeral planning. I was going to need all the advice and help I could get.

“I think I’m going to lie down for a bit,” I said, feeling exhausted even though I had done nothing.

“You do that. I’ll keep an eye on the baby. Get some rest, dear. You have a long few days ahead of you.”

I headed to my room, dreading what was to come. My life had been shaken up and turned upside down with one phone call.