Six
For three days and nights, Erin lived in a haze of tears and grief. Finding Selena dead had scared her psyche. She barely slept and her nightmares were terrible. The only thing heavier than the grief was the guilt. Why hadn’t she stopped Selena from leaving that night? She should have wrestled her to the floor. She should have begged her to stay. She’d still be alive…if only…
On the morning of the fourth day, she was awakened by the gentle touch of Journey’s hand on her shoulder. She caressed Erin’s cheek and hummed for a moment, sending waves a peace into her heart.
“The funeral is today, Erin.”
She sat up and reached for Journey. She held her and rocked her like a small child while Erin cried yet again.
“I’ve brought you a black dress to wear, in case you don’t have one.”
“I need flowers.” She sniffed. “Blue flowers, the color of Selena’s eyes.”
“That’s lovely, sweetheart. We’ll get some on the way.”
Erin thought about the finality of a funeral and collapsed in on herself. “Selena wouldn’t kill herself. She was my best friend. I know she wouldn’t! Maddox killed her. He has to pay.”
“Shhh…Maddox didn’t kill her. Perhaps someone else did, but it wasn’t him.”
“No. He did it. I know he did.”
“He was investigated. There was nothing. Your own account collaborated his story of the events of that night. I think you should accept that maybe she did choose to end her life.”
“No. He’s a liar. Everything about him is a lie.” Erin ground her teeth.
Journey shook her head but didn’t argue anymore. “Come on. Wash your face. Get something to eat. I’ll wait for you. We can go together.”
Erin slid the black dress on and didn’t bother to look in the mirror. She checked on her dad before leaving. He was pale and unable to get out of bed. She stopped short as she opened the front door. Jaris was there, dressed in a black suit, with a handful of flowers.
“Hey,” he said quietly.
She sniffed and then ran into his arms.
“Who’s this?” Journey asked.
Erin backed away from him. “This is Jaris. He’s a friend.”
He looked at Journey, his eyes widening. “The Storyteller,” he said with awe. “Wow. It’s an honor to meet you.”
“What are you doing here?” Erin asked. “Did you call? I missed it if you did.”
He tore his gaze away from Journey and looked at her. “I sent you a few messages, but when I heard the news about your friend…I just thought I’d come and see if you needed, or wanted me to be with you today. A willing shoulder, you know.”
She grabbed his face and kissed him hard, her tears falling on his cheeks. Her lip trembled as she pulled away. “Thank you.”
Journey cleared her throat and gave Erin a sad, knowing smile. “I’ll see you there?”
Erin nodded. Jaris wrapped his arm around her shoulders protectively. “I’ll take care of her,” he assured Journey.
“Okay.” She squeezed Erin’s hand quickly before walking past them and away.
She rested her head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry. I hardly know you, but it means so much that you came. I feel safe with you.”
He didn’t say anything; he just led her off the porch and down the street. The funeral was held outside in Anue’s memorial gardens. A white marble memory stone was already set up for Selena, and it pulsed with pale light. On this day only, the stone would collect memories of Selena, transferred from everyone who chose to touch the marble while it was illuminated. From then on, anyone passing through the memorial garden could touch Selena’s stone and would see all the good memories her loved ones had left behind.
There was an emptiness inside Erin. A ravenous hole that devoured her from within. All through the funeral, her mind kept returning to Selena, cold and lifeless on the ground. Left behind like trash when she was so special.
Maddox.
The image of his name carved on her skin twisted Erin’s heart around and around. A scorching hatred for him spread through her like a disease. He would pay for this.
Selena’s parents came over to her, embraced her, cried on her. She could barely stand it. The guilt crashing back on her again. She wanted to use her elf blood and disappear. Long words were spoken about Selena. Erin closed her eyes, and let her mind drift, refusing to listen. All too quickly, it was her turn to come forward and touch the memory stone.
Her hands shook as her broken heart spilled from her eyes. She held her breath, walking up to the stone. She didn’t want to do this. She couldn’t… but she had to. Just one memory. She could only leave one. Which one was the right one? Erin hesitated, then she knew. It had to be her favorite one, nothing else would be adequate. She closed her eyes and exhaled, her fingertips connecting to the marble.
She watched the memory in her mind.
Erin jumped, just about to get into bed as a pebble hit her window. She looked out and instantly opened the glass. Fifteen-year-old Selena climbed through.
“What are you doing?” Erin whispered.
“I had to tell you something.”
Her heart sank. She knew Selena’s parents had not been happy they’d become such close friends.
“My mom and dad sat me down and got all serious, telling me I shouldn’t be friends with you anymore.”
“Because I’m Halfling?” Erin asked.
“Yeah,” Her eyes were burning. Erin had never seen her look like that. Selena didn’t get mad, ever.
“I listened quietly. Then I told them to take their racist asses back to Kyhael if that’s how they felt, where they could live among all the other snobby Elves…Then I told them, I’m not giving you up. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.”
Erin hugged her tightly. “Thank you! I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t my friend anymore.”
Selena was shaking slightly and blew out a breath. “I’ve never talked to my parents like that…” She giggled. “You should have seen their faces.”
“I’ll always be there for you. No matter what. You and me against the world.”
She opened her eyes abruptly, feeling that she was being watched. She pulled her hand away from the stone, glancing around when she spotted the source of her feeling. Across the outdoor space, a guy was looking speculatively at her. Studying her. Frowning at her. She shivered under his dark gaze and pulled closer to Jaris.
“Who’s that?” she whispered.
“Who?”
“Straight across, looking at me.”
The two guys stared each other down. Jaris scowled and wrapped his arm around her shoulders in a possessive move. This seemed to amuse the other guy a little. He nodded and turned away.
“That’s Kendrick. High society prick and—“
“Maddox’s best friend,” she finished angrily.
“Yeah. Old money. Prominent elf society of Paradigm. His mother is Catarina. I think she’s a big wig in Fortress, but I’m not sure.”
The funeral was over, and people were beginning to disperse. Erin’s gaze followed Kendrick. Red clouded her vision, and she came after him. Jaris followed her.
She marched right up to his back and shoved him in the shoulder. “Hey you,” she said aggressively.
He turned, bemusement on his face. “Can I help you?” he asked, one eyebrow raised.
“Kendrick?”
He smiled. “You know my name, but I don’t have the pleasure of yours.”
“Erin.” Her voice was clipped. “Selena’s best friend.”
His expression turned sympathetic. “I’m sorry. It’s such a terrible tragedy.”
“You saw her the night she died. You were with her.”
He straightened. “I was questioned at Fortress, you should know, since I can see the blame in your eyes. I had nothing to do with her suicide. It happened hours after I last saw her.”
“What about Maddox?”
“What about him?”
“I…he…” She tried to form the right words.
Kendrick reached out and took one of her hands. She looked at him, slightly shocked he would touch her.
“I understand. You’re distraught. True, Maddox took her to a party that night, but that was all. He decided she wasn’t the one for him. So, maybe she couldn’t take the disappointment. It wasn’t his fault.”
“But…”
“His name was carved into her arm, right?”
“Yeah.”
“He’s not stupid. If he killed her, do you really think he’d write his name on her? It’s ridiculous.”
She exhaled, frustration running all through her.
“You have such beautiful hair, Erin,” Kendrick said. “Such a rich red.”
She frowned at him. “What?” Was he hitting on her?
“Were you at the party that night?”
“I was, just for a few minutes.”
He smiled. “I thought so... Mystery Girl.”
“What?” He wasn’t making any sense.
Kendrick released her hand and took a step back. “It was nice to meet you. Too bad it’s on such a sad day.”
“Did you even care about Selena?” she demanded.
“Very much. If you’ll excuse me.” He turned and walked briskly away.
She turned to Jaris. “Wow. He’s… The rich really are different, aren’t they? He was polite, yet…”
“A scumbag?” Jaris offered.
“Exactly. Did you hear him call me Mystery Girl? What the hell was that?”
Jaris shrugged. “Do you want to get out of here?”
She looked back at the dispersing crowd, her heart weighed down. “Yeah.”
“Do you want to get something to eat or just go home?”
“I want to go to your place.”
His eyebrows shot up. “Um…okay.”
“I don’t want to go home. I just need to be somewhere I have no memories for a little while.”
“That makes sense.”
Jaris lived in the middle of Paradigm in a modest flat, typical of a young man just starting out on his own. She immediately relaxed when she came through the door. It wasn’t nasty or smelly, just a little messy. Normal. He apologized for the mess and began to pick up.
“Leave it. You weren’t expecting company. I crashed on you. I like it like this. It’s real.”
“Well, make yourself at home then.”
She plopped on his couch and exhaled. He took off his suit jacket and sat down next to her. She snuggled into his side and fell asleep. She woke up groggy with her stomach rumbling. The flat was going dark as the evening matured. She sat up and rubbed her eyes. She was alone. Jaris had covered her up with a fluffy throw. She stretched.
“Jaris?”
No answer. The flat was quiet. Where had he gone? Her feelings smarted a little that he’d left her alone. She stood and folded the throw. The door opening made her jump.
“Hey. You’re awake. I didn’t know if I should leave you, but I thought you might be hungry,” Jaris said. “I got takeout.”
She looked at the bag in his hands. The smell of greasy junk food filled the flat. “I’m starving.”
“Good, cause I bought a lot.” He laid the food out on the tiny table. “I have blood if you want some. You look a little weak.”
“Thanks. I’ll run away with you now.”
“What?” He smirked.
“At the hub, when we first met, you asked me to run away with you. Remember?”
“Hmm. Yes. I was being dramatic. I’d be content if you’d just agree to be my girlfriend.”
“You’re asking for exclusivity?”
He smiled brightly. “Not asking, just hoping.” His face fell suddenly, and he shook his head. “Sorry. The timing is wrong. It’s a bad day.”
“Ask me again sometime.”
“I promise you, I will.”
They ate together, and it was like their date—they gelled easily. He distracted her from the emptiness still eating at her insides. The night grew late.
“Do you need to check on your dad?” he asked. “Is he still sick?”
“Are you trying to get rid of me?”
“Not at all. I was hoping you’d think me heroically romantic if I showed concern about your dad.”
She chuckled. “Sucker.”
“I do honestly care.”
“I know. You’re a good guy.”
“But not too good, right?” he asked. “I have my bad boy side.”
She walked to the window and looked out at the lights of the city. He came up behind her. She turned, caught in his arms. She wanted to spend the night. She wanted to ask, or just make a move on him. She hurt so much she wanted him to put her back in her body.
“Jaris.” Her voice betrayed her thoughts. “Ask me to stay.”
He blinked down at her for a second then he shook his head. “No. I can’t take advantage of you like that. Not today, when you’re so raw emotionally.”
“Wow…I…”
He kissed her gently. “I would love for you to stay the night, soon. But now, I think I should probably take you home.”
She pulled tight into his chest. “I’m glad you yelled at me at the hub. Even if it was far from smooth. You’re quite tolerable.”
He chuckled. “That’s my main goal in life, being tolerated, especially by sweet and gorgeous females like yourself.”
He took her home, kissed her goodnight and left. Her dad was asleep, the house quiet and dark. She stood in the doorway of his bedroom and listened to his breathing for a few minutes. She went to her room and closed the door. Since she’d found Selena dead, she’d felt it, but part of her had shut down. I am alone. I lost my best friend. She would never be able to hear Selena’s voice again. They would never laugh together, cry together, nothing together ever again.
She thought of the people in her life that loved her and mattered. The few she had were wonderful, but none of them were her best friend. Erin hadn’t realized the preciousness of that place in her heart that only Selena could fill. That place would forever be desolate. Some things cannot be replaced.
The hate inside shivered and expanded. Maddox. He’d stolen from her. She would not let this pass. She’d cut his black heart out. Perhaps that would ease the ravenous hole eating her up.
In the dead of night, Maddox left the house, a hood shadowing his face, a knife in his belt, and a spade in his hand. He walked through the woods, searching. The night was warm, but he was frozen inside. He couldn’t have shown his face at the funeral, but he had to do something to pay his respects. Even though nothing he could do would ever be adequate. The idea of doing nothing made him sick.
Finally, the moonlight fell on the type of sapling he was looking for. He crouched down and dug it up, careful to not damage its roots. He opened a portal to Anue’s memorial gardens. Looking around, making sure there was no one there, he moved forward to Selena’s marble stone. He knew it was hers because it was still illuminated.
Maddox dug a hole next to the stone and set the sapling in the dirt. Burying its roots, he pulled out his knife and sliced his hand. His blood soaked into the ground at the base of the young tree. The branches shivered and stretched out. It would grow, and it would flower, dropping white petals over her.
Trembling, he reached to touch the stone. His fingertip barely grazed its smooth surface, flashes of a bright memory filling his mind. He pulled his hand back, his heart fracturing sharply at the sound of her laughter as a child. He couldn’t look at the memories of her.
Maddox picked up his spade and touched the tree once more, light from his hand sliding into the trunk. Light he didn’t notice. The tree shivered again, a faint gold shimmer pulsing through the veins of the leaves.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
He opened a portal home and left.
Kendrick came into his mother’s study and sat down by the fire.
“So?” Catarina asked.
“The story will be all over tomorrow’s headlines. Maddox will fall from grace.”
She smiled. “And then so will his mother…Thank you for your help. You did well, son. Keep to the course. We’re far from finished. I’ve worked too long to get close to Forest. Deceived and flattered until I gained her trust. We will see this all the way through. I will be the next Hailemarris.”
“Yes, Mother.”