I don’t see Hamish that night and I don’t tell him about the incident yesterday as we fly to the Training Rock. Word doesn’t spread so quickly here. I add a mental point to the Bruma side.
I’ve started keeping tally.
“Are you alright?” he asks, watching me as I laugh at another of his comments.
I bite my cheek to stop the grin spreading and nod. “Maybe your jokes are just funny today. For once,” I say and lean back as he tries to flick my cheek.
I strap myself into my Soar when we get there and as he heads towards the edge of the first step I run in the opposite direction. To the side that falls into sheer nothingness - unless you hit the rocks on the way down first.
“Willow!” I hear his scream behind me.
I keep my legs straight and push the wings out.
I plunge out of sight, and then with a mighty push, I surge up above his head and circle him twice before landing near the edge. He’s frozen halfway through the process of strapping himself in.
“You just—” he splutters.
I beam at him. “I know! I did it by accident yesterday and now I’ve got the feel for it…” I trail off as his face falls.
“Do you know how much you just scared me?” he asks. His expression is like Kaura’s when I tell her off. It’s not angry. He looks at me like I’ve betrayed him. My grin slips.
“It was only meant as a joke, I apologize.” It’s something the fighters from the barracks would have found hilarious. Obviously, near death experiences don’t make Hamish laugh. I suppose the Outer Rings skewed my humor.
He narrows his eyes at me, but then sighs and drops his anger. Just like that. It’s incredible. He smiles and strolls toward me, inspecting his hand.
“I’ll forgive you,” he says. “But only if you—”
“Wait, let me guess,” I roll my eyes, “You want a kiss. Oh no, wait. Maybe you’ll say you want a pear and then kiss me anyway. Males. You’re so original.” I stop as I realize I sound crazy.
His face goes red and he stutters his reply. “N-no. I was going to say I’ll forgive you if you race me back to Isha’s.” I look at him as his face gets redder still with his obvious lie. My own cheeks are red from my rant, so I grin at him and tip off the cliff.
Even with a head start, he wins.
After this, my lessons speed up. He shows me the layout, the safest air paths between the rocks. He shows me how to navigate longer distances with the color gradient. This is how the Ire navigates the Oscala so easily. If you’re lost, you only need to soar to higher ground and find yourself again. It’s hard to see the colors in the middle. Hamish has taught me what they all mean. Orange near Osolis, to grey, to white near Glacium. And, as promised, he takes me exploring.
Jimmy comes with us. His mother is so thankful she almost cries. The pale, freckled boy zips around me. Hamish keeps calling him back and, a dozen times, my heart skips a beat whenever he comes within a breath of a rock face. Somehow he always pulls back in time. It’s like the Soar is a part of him.
“How is he so good at seven years old?” I yell to Hamish as the air rushes past us.
“Just a natural,” he shouts back.
We stop for the noon meal and I polish off every crumb. The fresh air makes me hungry, but I don’t drop in an exhausted heap in my tent at the end of the day anymore.
I tilt my head back so I can look straight up.
“You would never know there are a few hundred people up there. You can’t hear a thing,” I say.
Hamish lies back beside me. “Nope. The scouts say they get the occasional whisper of sound coming through during our Sunday celebrations. Of course we always make sure the pathway is empty before starting,”
“How long does it take to get from Glacium to Osolis?” I ask.
He purses his lips. “Two days. If you time it right. There’s the smoke to take into account.” I gape at him. Two days! It took me a month to walk the Oscala.
He continues. “I’ve never done it. Father doesn’t think I should get into trade.” The way he says this lets me know what he thinks about his father’s opinion. I know he usually tends the animals. I guess someone else has done this while he’s been teaching me to fly.
I wish I could launch into a discussion of how the Soars could revolutionize the communication between Glacium and Osolis. But I don’t know Hamish well enough to broach the subject yet. Especially considering secrecy is the Ire’s greatest code.
“That’s where I saw ‘em,” Jimmy interrupts, pointing over to a large spiraling rock.
Hamish has walked out of listening range. I follow the direction of his finger and start when I see we’re on the pathway. I didn’t notice how far down we’d flown. A thin, nearly forgotten memory bothers me. I latch onto it and it comes back to me. On the Oscala, I thought I was going crazy. Rock crevices started to look like Tellio lizards, and there was a flash of red one day, which I’d dismissed as another illusion. I wonder now if this was something after all. The red of Jimmy’s hair is a similar color. If so, it was lucky he wasn’t spotted by Malir or Rhone. They hadn’t been impeded by a veil.
“Jimmy.”
“Yeah?” he replies.
I have to phrase this carefully. “I don’t want you to disobey your mother by going exploring on your own,” I say. “But if you go along with others and spot something unusual, could you tell me?” I ask.
He thinks this over. I know what’s holding him back.
“Of course, no one would ever hear anything from me. You know, about where you, and the people you’ve gone with, have been.” He smiles at me, sticking out his chubby hand. I shake it with a laugh.
I chew my lip before adding, “Be careful.”
We fly far enough through the islands to get a look at the smoky barrier of Osolis. The smell of it brings a bursting desire to see my brothers. They sit underneath me somewhere. What are they doing? Are the twins still causing chaos for their nannies? Is Olandon still enjoying the attention of all the young women? After an entire year, I am within sight of my world! I could slip away with the Soar. I still don’t have a veil. But I’ve seen several materials unique to Osolis since arriving here. The Ire might have the right fabric to make a new one. They do trade with both worlds after all.
“We better head back. It’s late,” Hamish says. I wrench myself away from the edge.
If this opportunity had come a year ago, I would have leaped at the chance handed to me. Now I’m almost certain if I return, I’ll be slaughtered by my mother. The thought is twisted, but no less true for being so.
The next evening at the weekly celebration, I once again find myself in complete disbelief as to how this village has escaped notice for so long. Adox’s father must have been very clever. I know Adox is. He’s reasonable and gives good advice, isn’t prone to anger and rewards honesty and honor. He truly cherishes his people.
“You don’t need lessons anymore,” Adox says as I take a seat close to him.
I contain a smile. “No, I don’t.”
“Do you want to tell him, or should I?” he asks with a pointed look at Hamish.
I laugh softly, but I do feel a pang at losing Hamish’s regular companionship. “I’ll do it,” I say.
Adox echoes my laugh. “Good luck.” I wonder how old he is. He has nearly as many wrinkles as Aquin.
I look into the crackling fire which heats my skin. My thoughts quickly turn to my least favorite Bruma. Fire always reminds me of him. Of the way he makes me feel. I squeeze my eyes closed, trying to drive the thoughts away. Why won’t they go away?
“Who did you leave behind, young one?” he asks.
I clear my throat, not turning. “No one.”
An amused sound tells me what he thinks of my answer. “Well whoever ‘no one’ is, they must have held a big space in your heart to make you look so sad,” he says, rising slowly from his seat. I watch as he limps off, my heart falling in my chest.
I smile as I watch Hamish spin one of the women from the nursery around the dance floor. He catches me watching and winks. I jerk back from the fire, worried he’ll drag me up to dance again. I didn’t enjoy that experience at all.
He sprawls next to me a few minutes later, puffing for breath. With a chuckle, he throws a warm arm around my shoulders.
“Don’t worry, baby. It was just a dance,” he says.
“Don’t call me baby,” I snap. There’s only one person who has called me that, and I don’t appreciate the reminder. “You can dance with whomever you wish.” I stop talking. I sound like I’m insanely jealous. He grins at me and leans in. I quickly pull my head away.
“Come on, Willow. I’m sorry.”
I sigh and untangle myself from his arms. “Contrary to how it sounds, I really don’t care who you dance with. In fact, I hope you dance with many more women tonight and find some nice girl who will love you as you deserve. I’m going back to Isha’s,” I say as I clamber up from the low seat and move swiftly away from the dancing. I think I made myself pretty clear. If he didn’t get that hint, he was as dense as the rock under my feet.
“Willow, wait!” I turn to see Jimmy’s flash of red hair. I smile at the boy as he stands to attention.
“Jimmy, well met.” I smile at him.
He leans up against a rock and slides his eyes to me, arms folded. “So. You said you wanted to know if I saw anything,” he says casually. I grin at him and mimic his pose against the rock.
“Find anything interesting?” I ask, studying my nails.
“You can’t tell Mama.” I have to bite my tongue when he mimics my action. I assure him I won’t.
He blurts out his story. “I was out near Glacium and saw them take a man off the pathway,” he blurts.
“Who is ‘them’ Jimmy?”
He rolls his eyes. “The guards of course.” That’s unusual, but I’m not worried. I shrug.
“That’s what they’re meant to do,” I say, standing to swoop up my Soar.
“But do they normally find Solati?”
I whip my head back, freeze from where I’ve started strapping myself in. “What?”
“I know. They were dragging him off to the King. I heard them talking about it.”
I grip the boy’s shoulder. “How close were you? What did the man look like?” Jimmy looks up at me with wide eyes. I relax my grip.
“H-he had black hair, kind of like yours, how it’s a bit blue. His eyes were dark. I know because they called him Solati and I got real close and checked. He was thin, too. Kind of like my Uncle when he got sick,” he says.
I breathe in and out, trying to clear my head. It can’t be! It can’t be Olandon!
I shake my head and squeeze Jimmy’s shoulder absently. But what if it is?
“Thank you so much. You’ve done well,” I say. I fasten the chest strap with shaking hands. The man Jimmy’s described could be any of a hundred Solatis. But how many of these men had a reason to travel the Oscala? And how many have the same hair color?
I fly faster than I’ve ever flown before, landing on Isha’s island at a run, and throwing the Soar to the ground. There’s no one else here. They’re still at Adox’s. I pace back and forth, jerking my hands through my wind-blown hair. I stop at the edge of the island and look in the direction of Glacium, using the color gradient to guide me.
I take a couple of minutes to think my decision through. I inhale and release it slowly. Am I overreacting? It all depends on whether the man is my brother.
I make my choice.
I’ve got to go. It’s not worth the risk. It will take me back to the man I’ve grown desperate to avoid. But if it’s my brother and something has happened to him, I’ll never forgive myself.
Isha, Cris and Hamish touch down behind me.
Hamish rushes over. “We saw you run. What’s wrong?”
I shake my head and push his hands away, approaching Isha instead.
“Isha. I need some black material. The type I want is heavy, but you can see through it. Do you know the kind?” I ask.
She shares a glance with Cris. “Yes, we call it Videre.”
“I need some, about this much.” I show her with my hands. “Do you think you can get some for me? Quickly, I need it quickly,” I say. I want to grip her arms, but I clench my fists by my side.
“Well, of course, but what’s wrong? Won’t you tell us?”
I hesitate, about to say no, but I can’t just leave without an explanation. “I…a friend is in trouble. Please understand, I can’t tell you more than this.” I look at each of them and lower my eyes. “I’m sorry.” They are shocked, surprised, confused. I close my eyes and swallow.
Isha picks up a Soar and moves to the edge. “I’ll be back in ten minutes.”
“You’re not serious!” Hamish says incredulously.
“She saved my daughter’s life. Yes, I’m serious,” she says while strapping herself in. She disappears over the side.
“Could I please get some food for the journey? Just a little?” I ask Cris. He takes the hint and retreats to the dugout cave where they keep their supplies.
“You can’t do this. You can’t leave on your own,” Hamish says. I close my eyes, loathe to see his look of betrayal. It’s different. Running away from him. I knew Jovan could handle it. But Hamish just seems so breakable sometimes.
“Hamish–” I start.
“No. I’ll come with you. Surely the more help there is, the better for your friend.”
“You can’t,” I say. Hamish pulls up short and I see his hurt. I hurry on. “You can’t go where I’m going. And I think you forget I used to be in the fighting rings. I’ll be safe.” His eyes darken. He doesn’t believe me. Even though he’s seen me fight. I gesture helplessly. I don’t know what to say.
Hamish closes the distance between us. His movements are so angry I barely turn my head in time to divert his kiss to the side of my mouth. His kiss is still warm. It’s secure. He would always be there, if I needed him. But I’ve chosen.
I pull away, and meet his gaze. “I go alone.”
Cris exits with the food in a satchel. He’s probably been waiting for us to finish arguing before coming out. He hands the bag to me and I sling it over my back.
“If you see Crystal…” Cris starts.
“Then I’ll be sure to tell her how you both are,” I say and give him a hug. “Thank you. I’m sorry I can’t tell you more. Please repeat my apologies to Adox and assure him the sanctuary will be safe if I’m unable to make it back.”
“I’ll do that.” He gives me a brief hug.
Isha lands on feather-light feet behind me. She holds out the material to me. My heart leaps into my throat. I can’t deny a large part of me hoped to never see the symbol of my childhood abuse again. But if it’s my brother, he’ll need help. I need to go back as Olina, not Frost.
Running to my tent, I grab Kedrick’s arrow and slide it into my boot and then grab the wooden band which keeps my veil on. I shove this down the front of my suit followed by the veil. Every time I leave somewhere, I lose more of my possessions.
Hamish is gone when I exit the tent. I ignore the pang of guilt from hurting him and hug Isha goodbye.
“You’ll always be welcome here,” she says.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
I stand at the edge and look down, unafraid with the Soar strapped to my back. I look up at the bright white light in the distance.
I jump.