Chapter Three
Kat probably checked her rearview mirror at least a hundred times, trying to see if any cars were following her, but all she saw was the ambient glow of her taillights as she wound her way through the back roads. She’d obviously seen too many action and suspense movies lately. From now on I watch strictly rom-coms. There wasn’t anything in a Katherine Heigl movie that could add to her paranoia.
Ten minutes later, she hit the two-stoplight downtown of Alabaster. Another five minutes and she was in her upstairs apartment over the local tattoo joint, throwing all three deadbolts and securing the chain lock.
Kat sagged back against the door and didn’t even try to stop her knees from buckling as she slid to the floor, a shaking bundle of nerves. Over a decade had passed since she’d felt helpless against the sexual advances of a man, and yet all it took was a single moment for it all to crash in around her. She despised the binding vulnerability that made her weak when she needed to be strong. A target when she wanted to be a weapon.
Clenching her hands into fists to stop them from trembling, she forced herself to take deep breaths and forget about past threats so she could focus on the new one.
Looking around, she studied her small studio for any signs that someone had been there, but as far as she could tell from her current position, everything was exactly as she’d left it.
The black futon couch in its upright position still had her leopard-print Snuggie thrown over the back. Her latest movie purchases—her main form of entertainment—were spread out where she’d left them on the old trunk she used as a coffee table, dining table, footrest, and nightstand. The kitchenette to the right looked untouched, its mini-counter bare except for the microwave and toaster she used to cook most of her meals.
So, she thought, unless they’d done something to, or were still hiding in, her three-quarter bathroom off to the left, her place was uncompromised. For now.
Pushing off the floor, she got to work on doing what she could to feel as relaxed and safe as she possibly could in her situation. She poured a full glass of Jack and downed half of it on the spot with four ibuprofen before refilling it and setting it on the wooden trunk.
Rolling her head to stretch her neck in hopes of relieving some of her tension, Kat changed into her typical sleepwear: a wife beater tank and panties. She had a window A/C unit, but it only worked when it wanted to and Louisiana summer nights were brutal, so the less she wore, the better.
As she pushed her skirt off, she sucked in a breath at the tender points on her hips. Glancing down, she saw the four red marks on both sides where Rick’s fingers had bruised her from pressing her skin against her own hip bones. It had been a long time since she’d seen marks like those on her body, and seeing them now threatened to choke her brain with the bile of her past.
But she’d be damned if she let it. She had more important things to worry about. Like whether or not she even had a future if she couldn’t figure a way out of dealing with Sicoli’s men.
Once she finished dressing, she opened the bottom drawer of her dresser and dug out her 9-mil from under all her shirts. She almost never took it out, but Lenny had made sure years ago that she knew how to use one. At the time, she’d thought it was sweet that he wanted to make sure she was able to protect herself. It didn’t take long to realize that using it to protect or cover him had probably been closer to his intentions. A real peach, that guy.
She dropped the clip into her palm to check the bullets and then slammed it back up before double-checking the safety and tucking it under her pillow on the futon. She turned on Anchorman because it was already in the DVD player and it was a good choice for anyone who wanted to escape into the hilariously dumb. Unfortunately, even Ron Burgundy and one and a half glasses of whiskey couldn’t numb her enough to forget the last hour.
Leaning forward with her elbows on her knees, Kat rested her head in her hands. What the hell was she going to do? She’d never been the brains of this outfit. Well, neither had Lenny, but he’d always been the leader. He’d say it was time to go and she’d pack up their measly belongings and they’d head out in the Celebrity to the next town Lenny was sure would be both safe and a gold mine just waiting for them.
We got eyes on you and ears with the pigs.
The idea of Sicoli’s men watching her every move made the small hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. She glanced at the windows looking out over Main Street. The dingy white curtains glowed with orange and red from the neon tattoo sign below her windows.
The guys who came collecting in Tennessee last time made it abundantly clear what would happen to her if they didn’t get their money. Sicoli couldn’t let debts go unanswered. It made him look lenient, weak. If the debtor couldn’t pay, he or she was eliminated. And apparently, as far as Sicoli was concerned, she owed the money just as much as Lenny.
She was as good as dead.
Kat had to try and make a run for it. Tomorrow was payday, though, and she’d need every bit of money she could get. She’d go to work like always, let them follow her home and think she was going to sleep. Then she’d pack everything she could in a backpack, wait a couple of hours, and sneak out the back. She’d have to leave the car behind and rely on public transportation or hitchhiking if necessary. Whatever it took to get as far away as possible.
She’d be on her own for the first time in her life, her ties to Lenny and her old life completely severed. Even though that had been her goal for the last month, now that it was time to follow through, she felt like throwing up, and her entire body shook with fear. Then again, that could be because she also had the added pressure of a crime boss after her now. Either way, she’d run like hell until she couldn’t run anymore.
The cell phone on top of her dresser started ringing, and her head snapped up. She’d had that phone for years, though Lenny didn’t know it. She had always left it off and kept it well hidden, but after he got arrested, she’d turned it on and left it out. Not that she ever answered it. Only one person had the number to that phone, and though it killed her to constantly avoid her sister, Vanessa would only try to involve herself, and Kat couldn’t let that happen.
She waited for the chirp that signaled a new voice mail and then punched in the code to listen.
“Hiya, Kitty-Kat.” Vanessa always sounded two parts happy and one part sad on her voice mails. Like she couldn’t be completely happy because of the distance—both physical and emotional—Kat kept between them. Every voice mail twisted the knife in Kat’s heart that had been there since the day Nessie left for college almost fifteen years earlier. “So, I’m sitting here making seating charts for the wedding. I really miss you, Kat, and even though I’m so happy with Jackson, the only thing that could make my wedding day perfect is having you there with me. If you call me, I’ll fly you out and fly you back to wherever it is you want to go, I promise. Just…” Sigh. “Listen, I’m going out of town tomorrow for a couple weeks. I’ll be unavailable by phone, but I’ll call you as soon as I get back, k? I love you, Kitty-Kat. ’Bye.”
Hot tears singed Kat’s cheeks as they streamed down her face. Nessie had been Kat’s whole world growing up. A day didn’t go by that it didn’t kill her to not be in her life. And now that her sister had found the love of a good man—something neither of them had ever believed existed—she felt even more remorse that she couldn’t be there for Nessie to share in her happiness.
Kat returned to the futon and stretched out on her side, hugging the Snuggie to her front and tucking it between her legs. It was too damn hot to wear a thick blanket with sleeves, but she couldn’t sleep unless she was at least holding onto something. When she was a little girl, it had been her stuffed animals or Nessie. Once she left home, she adapted to using the comforter or blanket or even another pillow to clutch in front of her. It didn’t matter, just so long as she didn’t feel so alone.
She wiped away the tears and reminded herself that at least her sister had made it. If good things were truly possible for people like them, then she was glad they’d happened to Nessie. She was the pure one of the two, and she deserved every good thing the world had to offer.
Kat, however, was too tainted by their past. It had touched her in ways it hadn’t Vanessa, and the results had stained her soul irreparably. Though Kat had made peace with that knowledge a long time ago, there were times when she couldn’t help but wish it could be different. That maybe she could find happiness with a man who would never hurt her.
Someone like Irish.
As her eyes drifted closed, Kat remembered the way he’d gently tilted her face up to his so he could look her in the eyes. And it was with that image that she finally, blessedly succumbed to sleep.