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Fighting Redemption: A Small Town Romantic Suspense (Texas SWAT Book 1) by Sidney Bristol (21)

ALEX CLIMBED INTO HIS truck and shut the door. He couldn’t remember the last time sitting at a desk all day had exhausted him. He’d spent the day with his nerves ramped up to ten and watching Jenna’s every move, while trying to pretend he wasn’t tuned into her.

She knew.

He sank into the plush, leather seat and leaned his head back.

She knew, and yet his past wasn’t what she was pissed about.

Or was that an act? Was she mad about everything? Part of him was still afraid to trust things weren’t going to crash down around him.

Could she forgive him? Really and truly?

God, he hoped so.

His phone buzzed away in his pocket, breaking the mental refrain.

“Hey, Delores. I was thinking I should call you.” Alex leaned against the door and smiled.

“Horse shit.”

“I didn’t say I was thinking about it now.”

“That I might believe.” She muttered something else under her breath. Alex smothered a chuckle. Delores had to be between her pain pills for her to be this much of a grump.

“How you doing? Need anything?”

“I need for people to stop bringing dishes by. I have so many casseroles I’m going to eat myself to death before I can walk some of it off. You should come get some of this. Or is that pretty new thing of yours keeping you fed?”

“We’re doing okay.”

“I’ve heard all about your day.”

“My day?”

“Someone said you were put on leave.”

“God damn it.” He blew out a breath. Yeah, it was going to get out and people would talk, but so fast?

“You must like this one.”

“This one? What other one has there been?”

“That’s my point. Have you told her?”

Alex closed his eyes.

“Someone else told her.”

“And?”

“And she says she’s okay with it, but she’s pissed about how she found out.”

“Oh, really? I like this one.”

He bit the inside of his cheek. If he could voice his concerns to anyone, it was Delores. She was all the family he had.

“What if...what if she doesn’t mean it?”

“Then she doesn’t deserve you, sweet heart. I know how much you beat yourself up over any little mistake you make, and I remember how you were when you got here. There isn’t a malicious bone in your body. You ain’t a killer. You ain’t a bad cop.”

Delores’s words soothed him like his mother’s might have were she still alive. Ransom had given him things he’d been missing out. It’d taken a great tragedy to put him on the road to discovering his chosen family. And he wanted to add Jenna to that list. She mattered to him, more now than before.

He loved her. The real her. Not the made-up version in his head he’d created and put on a pedestal, but the tough as nails woman who’d shared his bed.

“You still there?” Delores asked.

Alex cleared his throat. “I am, sorry about that.”

“Well, just checking on you. What are you doing about keeping your girl safe?”

“Her name is Jenna and I’ve got a plan.”

“Good. Well, I’ll let you go. When this is all over, the two of you are coming over for dinner. It’s about time I got to cross examine her.”

“Leave her alone. She doesn’t need your grilling.”

“Alright, no promises. Talk to you later.”

Alex hung up and stared at the phone, a bit more of the uncertain weight sliding off. He fired up the truck and sent off a text to let Jenna know he was pulling around. With any luck she’d cooled off and he could try to explain himself better. They’d liked each other for so long, he wasn’t surprised at the depth of his emotions for her. The question was, what was she feeling? Was it the same kind of attachment? He wasn’t ready to find out. Not yet, at least.

Trevor and Jenna waited for him by a side entrance. The new detective opened Jenna’s door and handed her in.

“You two have a plan for tonight?” Trevor asked.

“Yeah.” Alex reached for his phone.

“No, don’t tell me where you’re staying. Send me an email, and I’ll only look at it if I need to.”

“Is that really necessary?” Jenna wrinkled her nose.

“Probably not, but this guy attacked you, planted evidence for you to find and has proven he’s resourceful at getting close to you. I’d prefer to not take any chances. You need anything?”

“I think we’re good,” Alex said.

“Thanks, Trevor.”

He backed up and closed Jenna’s door, waving them off.

She flopped in her seat, blowing out a breath.

Alex started driving, waiting for her to say something, but she didn’t utter a word. It wasn’t like her. He could feel the wedge between them like a tangible object.

The facts were a stalker like hers was dangerous. The guy had months of unregulated access to Jenna’s home life and now he was cut off. Alex knew that either the cops would catch the suspect or he would try to attack Jenna. Now that the attack had happened, things would continue to escalate the less access he had to the focus of his affections. Which meant Jenna was in very real danger.

“About earlier...” Alex swallowed. What did he say?

Jenna didn’t help him out. She remained silent.

“I trust you with my life,” he said.

“But you don’t trust me with mine.”

“That’s not it.” He smacked his hand on the steering wheel.

“You don’t trust me to know where the line is with the guys. You don’t trust me to know your past. I don’t—”

“I do. I was wrong when I got pissed about you and Trevor, and I was wrong to not tell you about my history. Jenna...” Alex pressed his head back against the seat. “I want us to work out so badly I’m fucking it up.”

“It’s Sterling.” Jenna held up her phone and stared at the incoming call.

“Take it.” With any luck a moment to gather his thoughts would be a good thing.

“You mind?”

“No.”

“Hey, Sterling...Slow down. Where are you?” Jenna sat forward. The change in her tone set off all his warning bells. “Yes, I think I know where that is.”

“Where?” he whispered.

“Grapevine,” she mouthed back. “Okay, Sterling, take a deep breath and say that again.”

Alex shifted gears and gassed it. He didn’t need to know more than what he already did to sense the urgency. He steered the truck toward the 820 loop, not waiting for further instructions.

“Hold on, Sterling, we’re on our way.” Jenna reached over and covered his hand on the gear shift, squeezing it. She tapped at the screen with her thumb, a second later another, crackly voice filled the cab. “She can’t hear me. Head to the mall.”

“What happened?”

“I’m not totally sure. She’s not making a lot of sense.”

“Okay.” Talk about timing. “Do we need to call for back-up?”

“It’ll be easier on her if I can handle this.” Jenna tapped the screen. “Yes, I hear you. I was just telling Alex where to drive. Can you start at the beginning? Tell me what happened?”

Alex wasn’t convinced. The last time she’d gone to meet with Sterling, Jenna wound up with a dead bird in her car and a live one in her fridge. What if her friend was involved? What if they were looking for the wrong suspect? It was a ridiculous notion, but her safety was the most important thing to him right now. A little paranoia might just keep her breathing.

“WE’RE HERE. WHERE ARE you?” Jenna reached for the passenger door.

“Wait.” Alex grabbed her elbow and hauled her back into her seat.

Sterling continued to mutter, “Please get here,” over and over again.

She pressed the receiver to her cheek and mouthed, “What?”

“Wait for me,” he whispered.

Jenna pulled out of his grasp and pushed the door open.

“Sterling, where are you?”

She’d stopped making sense about ten minutes into the drive. All Jenna could figure out was that Sterling had fled her house after something happened, something that set her off into a downward spiral of panic.

Jenna jogged up the aisle between cars, swinging her head back and forth, searching for a single woman.

“I’m outside the Coat Factory. Where are you? I’ll come to you, Sterling.”

“I don’t know. I don’t know.”

“Okay, can you tell me what you see?”

Alex stomped behind her. She could feel the tension radiating off him. He didn’t like the situation? Well neither did she. There was nowhere worse for Sterling to be than a crowded, noisy mall where anything could happen.

“Please, please get here. They’re coming,” Sterling whispered.

Shit.

Jenna squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. She wanted to drop to the ground right here and huddle in a ball, but that wasn’t going to help Sterling. Jenna gathered up all her anxiety, her hope and her dread, and shoved them down deep. She cleared her throat and called upon her paramedic voice. The one she used with critical or hysterical patients when she couldn’t lose it.

“I’m here, but Sterling, I need you to take a deep breath and tell me what you see.” She managed to pull off a steady, calm tone.

“Green. I see green.”

“Okay, what is green? Grass? Trees? Is part of the building painted green?”

“No, the hesco.”

“A hesco?”

Jenna turned in place, surveying the parking lot, the street and retail shops a football field away. A hesco was a wire or mesh container they’d fill with whatever they were digging their forward bases into. They served as a blast wall, a line of defense and in times of heavy rain a barrier against flooding.

There wasn’t a hesco in sight. She’d sure as hell notice something like that in an urban, American environment.

“There.” Alex pointed at the side of the Coat Factory. Two large, trash compactors sat to the side of a delivery bay.

God, she wanted to kiss him.

“I’m coming for you,” she said into the phone.

Jenna took off at a jog, Alex at her side. They slowed as they reached the sidewalk curving around the mall. Jenna wasn’t stupid enough to run full tilt into Sterling, not when she was clearly hanging onto reality by her fingernails.

“We’re at the hesco, where are you?”

Something scuffed the concrete. She heard it half a second later through the phone.

“Sterling?”

“I’m here.”

Jenna waited a beat, but still no sign of Sterling. Alex grabbed her shoulder before she could take a single step toward the compactors. His scowl said she’d pushed him far enough. He stepped in front of her and they crept toward the narrow distance between the brick wall and the machinery.

“I’m with Alex. Big guy, dark hair. Can you see us?” Jenna tried to peer around Alex but he was firmly in her way.

“Stay back,” Sterling yelled. This time it didn’t echo through the phone.

“Hey, hey, I’m not going to hurt you.” Alex lifted his hands, spread wide. A universal, non-threatening gesture.

Jenna ducked around him, shoving her phone in her pocket.

Sterling huddled behind an outcrop of brick, peering at them.

“It’s me,” Jenna said around the lump in her throat.

“Jenna?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s not making sense.” Sterling pressed her palm to her forehead, gaze darting around, as if she thought someone else were there. Or about to attack her.

“I know it’s not. But you’re here. This is Texas. You’re home. This is the mall. Remember all the times you told me about shopping here?”

Sterling nodded.

“You’re home. You’re having a panic attack. You’re safe.” Jenna held out an arm, extending it toward Sterling. They needed to get her somewhere quiet and comfortable to help her unwind. “We’re going to get you out of here, okay? Can we take you somewhere safe?”

“It just feels so real,” Sterling whispered.

“I know it does, but you’re home. You’re safe.”

Sterling nodded and stepped out from behind the brick, arms wrapped around herself. She crossed to Jenna’s side, still glancing around as though she expected an attack. Jenna wanted to cry, she wanted to squeeze Sterling and get angry, but that wasn’t what Sterling needed right now.

“You haven’t met Alex yet.” Jenna wrapped an arm around Sterling’s waist, doing a single swipe pat down for any weapons. Sterling might not fully know what she was doing. “Alex, this is Sterling. Alex is our ride out of here. Can you—”

“It’s better if we stick together,” Alex said over her.

Jenna was ready to strangle him.

“Truck’s forty yards that way. Think you can make it?” Alex asked. There was kindness in his voice, but he was still being an asshole.

Sterling nodded.

Alex turned and took several slow steps, watching over his shoulder.

“When was the last time you were at the mall?” Jenna waited for Sterling to follow Alex at her own pace.

Sterling sucked down a breath and squeezed her eyes shut. Her lips moved in some silent refrain. She took a step forward and stared straight ahead.

“I think...Christmas. With Mom.”

“Yeah? Do you guys stay here? Or do you go visit family?”

“We host. All the family comes in. It used to be at my grandparents, but they’re in a nursing home now, so my parents organize it.”

“Do you have a lot of family?”

Sterling chuckled and darted a glance at her.

“You know all about my damn family.”

“Yes, but I’m getting your mind off bad stuff. Go with it.”

“This works?” One side of Sterling’s mouth lifted in a smile.

“You tell me.”

“You’re awesome.”

“Thanks. You’re pretty awesome yourself.” Jenna rubbed her hand up and down Sterling’s back.

“I don’t think they call going crazy awesome.”

“You aren’t going crazy. You had a bad moment, and you called for help. That’s what I’m here for. I’m your friend.”

Sterling nodded. Already her shoulders were relaxing, her posture wasn’t as tense and she wasn’t actively looking for a threat. They made it all the way to Alex’s truck without incident, which was no small miracle. He opened the back door and scooped out his SWAT gear. While he shuffled the gear around into the bed of the pickup, Jenna got Sterling into the backseat and climbed in after her. Alex could give her the stink-eye all he wanted to. He wasn’t the boss of her when she was on her own time.

Alex climbed into the driver’s seat and twisted around to face Sterling and Jenna.

“How you doing?” He leaned on the center console, his phone already out to take notes.

Sterling nodded and blew out a long, slow breath.

“Better,” she said.

Jenna rubbed her back, offering what comfort she could. Any other person going through what Sterling was experiencing she wouldn’t dare touch. Sometimes contact could set off more memories, but Sterling put up with Jenna’s hugs. She hoped it would further reinforce who Sterling was with.

“It’s nice to meet you, finally.” Alex’s voice softened, and he smiled. Most of all, there was no pity in his eyes. He, too, knew what it was like to be haunted.

“Wish it wasn’t like this,” Sterling said.

“Sterling, what happened?” Jenna asked.

“I don’t know.” Sterling shook her head, eyes squeezed shut.

“That’s okay. Let’s not worry about that right now.” Alex put the stylus down. “Jenna said you two went out for lunch yesterday, right?”

“Yeah.”

“What’d you have to eat?”

“We didn’t. The waitress just ignored us, so we had some drinks—tea, actually—and talked.”

“Okay, did you get something to eat later?”

“Yeah, on my way home.”

“Did you drive yourself?”

“I did.”

“You have your own car, or borrow your parent’s?”

“I have an old bug.” Sterling chuckled. “My dad bought it for me when I was in high school. Said nothing could hurt me in it. I never saw the point of getting something else because I wasn’t state-side enough to worry about it.”

“Nice. What year is it?”

“1957. My grandpa found it. Helped me fix it over the years, rebuild part of it.” Sterling smiled, her shoulders loose, elbows on her knees and an easy, fond smile on her lips.

“That’s cool. You’ll have to show it to us.”

“Uh.” Sterling glanced away, the smile gone. “It’s here. I drove it here.”

“Don’t worry about that yet. So you got something to eat and drove home yesterday. What did you do in the afternoon?”

Alex was firmly rooting Sterling in the now. In the present and establishing a timeline. Bringing yesterday’s memories to the forefront and easing the hold of anxiety. It was a smart line of questioning. Easy. Conversational. Totally disarming. She could kiss him for how understanding he was being.

“Yesterday afternoon...I helped my mom get groceries, clean up the garage, cook dinner and then I watched TV.”

“For how long?”

“All night.”

“All night?” Alex’s brows lifted. “How much sleep are you getting?”

“None.”

“Okay.”

“That’s when it happened.” Sterling rocked forward, scooting to the very edge of the bench seat. “I haven’t slept in...a while. I laid down this morning thinking I should at least try. I think I must have drifted off and dreamed...I dreamt someone was shooting at me. I grabbed my shoes and...this,” Sterling glanced down at the hoodie she wore. It was over a hundred degrees, way too hot for long sleeves, but her natural reaction was to grab her boots, vest and gun. “I just left. I got in my car and left. I think I knew it was a dream, but I was so scared. Nothing made sense.”

“I’d like to drive you home, if that’s okay with you?” Alex slid his stylus back into the phone without taking a single note.

“That would be great.” Sterling leaned back against the seat.

“Should we call your parents?” Jenna asked.

“They aren’t home, thank God.” Sterling rubbed her face, and all Jenna could think about were Sterling’s words from yesterday.

“Okay. Want to plug in your address?” Alex handed his phone over.

Sterling got the GPS set up and gave it back. They buckled in and before long, they were rolling out of the mall parking lot, headed toward the residential part of Grapevine.

“This used to be all farm land and cows.” Sterling stared out of the window.

“I remember when Ransom was like that. Or kind of.” Jenna let out an easy breath and relaxed into the seat.

“How long have you been there?” Sterling asked.

“Mom and dad moved there during my junior year when grandma got sick. She didn’t want to go anywhere, so the only thing to do was move to Ransom with her.”

“They’re in Florida now, right?” Sterling had a sharp memory.

“Yup. They’ve got themselves a nice little retirement spot.”

“A beach sounds real good right about now.”

“Maybe we should take a long weekend, head down to Padre Island or something. What do you say, Alex? Interested?”

Alex glanced at her in the rearview mirror, one brow lifted.

Jenna wasn’t ready to let go of their earlier conversation. She recognized Alex’s jealousy and possessive instincts showing through despite his attempts to rein them in. If they were going to work out, and she wanted them to, he was going to have to learn to trust her.

“This is it, up here on the left.” Sterling pointed at a pretty, brick house. The homes had large lawns and a little elbow room. “You guys going to call the loony bin on me?”

“No,” Alex said.

“Do we need to?” Jenna asked.

“I don’t know.” Sterling stared at her home.

Jenna could pretend she knew what Sterling was feeling, but the truth was, no matter how bad her nightmares got or how much she self-diagnosed, she didn’t have it as bad as Sterling. Jenna didn’t know what Sterling was going through.

“It’s up to you, but I think this is an improvement. You didn’t hurt anyone. You didn’t hurt yourself. You realized you needed help, and you called me.”

Sterling nodded.

“I’d like to look around, if that’s cool with you?” Alex killed the engine.

“Sure.” Sterling opened the door and all three of them piled out and onto the lawn.

“Is there a rear entrance?” Alex turned in place, surveying the street.

“Yeah, the garage and alley are back there.”

“You keep everything locked up?”

“Alex. Chill,” Jenna snapped. He was putting her on edge.

“I’m going to walk around the outside of the house, if that’s okay?”

“Sure.” Sterling shrugged.

They stood in the yard while Alex began to walk the front of the house, peering into the bushes and testing the windows for weakness.

“What is he doing?” Sterling asked.

“Being ultra-certain everything is okay. Don’t mind him. He’s being super cop.”

“He is fine.” Sterling slanted a look Jenna’s way and grinned. “Not as hot as my pilot, but I wouldn’t kick that out of bed.”

“Shut up.” Jenna tossed her head back and laughed.

“Jenna, Sterling, come here,” Alex called. Not a request.

The girls ambled across the lawn and through the privacy fence gate into the back yard. Alex crouched under a window, peering at little black spots on the rim of the stone flower bed.

“What’s that?” Jenna leaned over his shoulder.

“If I had to guess?” He glanced up at her.

“Yeah?”

“Snappers.”

“Snappers?” Jenna parroted back.

“Like, little fireworks?”

“You mean the ones you throw on the ground and they pop?”

“Yeah.” Alex very carefully did not touch the bits of white paper remnants. “There were a lot of these. What’s on the other side of this window?”

Jenna glance at Sterling, who seemed a bit paler.

“My bedroom.” Sterling licked her lips.

Alex straightened and his hand went to his hip where his gun should be were he in uniform.

“I want to go over the house, then start talking to neighbors.”

“Alex,” Jenna snapped. He had to tone it down. They needed to keep Sterling calm. “How about I look over the house and you talk to neighbors, okay?”

“Fine. I want you two to go inside and lock the doors.” His tone changed. He was in cop mode, and would tolerate no questions.

“Come on.” Jenna grasped Sterling’s hand, her heart pulsing in her throat.

This was bad, very, very bad.

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