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The courtroom is quiet. I can hear someone in the back of the room clear their throat. I swallow thickly and try to avoid their gazes. But I'm on the witness stand, I can't avoid them or any of this.

They’re all watching me. Waiting for an answer. I feel like I’m suffocating. This is too much.

It reminds me of being in the room with him. With Kade. My eyes dart to him, and my mouth parts slightly as I remember the time I spent with him.

The other men would watch. He said I had to be perfect, and if I was he’d give me my freedom. And he did. He’s a man of his word. But this freedom feels empty and hollow. I wish I could take it back. Not our time together, just my wish to be set free.

“Miss Bell?” asks the prosecution, snapping me out of my reverie.

“Yes?” I ask warily. My fingers twist in my hand. My heartbeat picks up. I don’t want to be here. I’d give anything to go back.

They’re waiting for me to talk, to testify against him and give evidence that Kade’s a bad man. That he deserves to be imprisoned not only for what he did to me, but for everything else.

But I can’t. He did it to protect me. He had to do it. My voice is caught in my throat. My blood heats and chills at the same time. The thought of turning against him makes me sick.

My eyes focus on him, and all I want to do is to run to his side. I wish he could just take me away. Instead he’s on trial, and I’m left alone to deal with the aftermath of how my life has changed forever.

Tears prick my eyes as Kade nods his head and gives me a small, sad smile. He wants me to answer them. He wants me to be a good girl and tell them everything they want to know so I can go free. It’s time to let go, angel. I hear his words and I hate them. I don’t want to let go of him. I was his, and now I feel like I’m no one.

“Do you need me to repeat the question?” the old man says as he stares at me through his spectacles.

I shake my head. I know what he asked. I know what they want from me.

My body relaxes as I remember how he broke me down bit by bit. Now it seems calculated, as though he knew what he was doing. Like he used me. That’s what they keep telling me, they say that’s why I feel this way about him. But back then, it felt different. It felt as though he was helping me. I thought he needed me. He did need me.

His fingers gently slid down the curve of my hip. “My angel,” he whispered. His lips barely touched the shell of my ear, his hot breath sending chills down my shoulder. As his hand slid farther down, he groaned with satisfaction. I was always ready for him. I learned to love what he did. I learned to be perfect for him.

“Miss Bell, answer the question.” The judge’s voice rings out and makes my body jolt in the seat.

I clear my throat thinking about where I should start and what all I should tell them. My heart clenches in my chest. I don’t want to share it with them. Right now these memories are mine. They’ll ruin them. They’ll make me think my recollections are something they aren’t.

They want me to believe he never loved me, and that the feelings I have for him are false.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to believe.

The only thing I know that’s true is I fell in love with Kade and that now, because of him, I’m utterly and completely broken.