Head down, I hustle into the gym before anyone spots me. I made it a point to get here extra early today, knowing less people would be around.

Dropping my bag on the floor, I set up some cones. For the next hour, I run through a few basic drills, my mind refusing to turn off.

Kalani, Jarrod, Parker, Kalani.

I sprint forward, dropping to touch the solid red line, and dash back, faster. Harder. Still, the past week’s events are front and center, refusing to be pushed back.

Kalani.

Jarrod.

The recording.

Parker. His shirt on her skin, laying on her bare breasts, teasing her naked thighs.

My foot slips against the freshly waxed floors, and I fall on my ass with an echoed thud. Throwing an arm over my eyes, I lie there with my back against the floor, attempting to catch my breath.

Kalani on my porch swing, a smile so soft on her lips, her body leaning into mine. Breathing me in. Loving me.

A grunt leaves me, and my fist hits the ground.

Loving me, my ass.

She said it herself, on the recording. She didn’t love me. It was all about what she could gain from me. What I could give her.

She already had all of me, why not have what is, or would be, mine, too? If that’s what she wanted, my future, I’d have given it all to her. Hell, I probably would have begged her to take it.

If she loved me.

Did she not know I would have given her everything?

Did I not show her, make her feel, how much I loved her?

I’d have done more, had I known. Not that it would have made a difference.

And that’s a bitter pill to swallow.

“The fuck you doing, man?”

I lift my arm, popping one eye open in time to see Austin step in front of me, an eyebrow raised.

I sigh, pushing myself into a sitting position, and rest my elbows on my knees. “Couldn’t sleep.” I shrug, averting my eyes to the retractable bleachers against the wall. “Figured I’d get here early, get a workout in.”

“Avoid the piranhas?”

I nod, dropping my head to my chest.

“Let’s go, man.” He thrusts his hand into my line of sight. “Class is in ten.”

I clasp my hand in his, allowing him to pull me up. We collect the cones and my workout bag in silence, then make our way to the locker room.

“You alright?” he asks, casting me a sideways glance.

“Yeah, man. I’m good.” I toss my bag into my locker, pulling my wet shirt over my head. “Not looking forward to the awkward shit today’s sure to bring though, that’s for sure.”

He drops down on the bench, leaning his back on the lockers opposite of me. “I hear that. You talk to her?”

“Nah, man.” I shake my head, scrubbing my hands down my face. “It’s done. None of it was real, so what’s the point?”

“You wanna talk about it?”

I laugh lightly and say, “Nope,” and he laughs in return.

“Then get your ass showered before we’re late.”

“You can go on ahead.”

He smirks knowingly. “I’m good.”

My lip tips up briefly. “Thanks, man.”

He nods, looking down at his phone. “Hurry up.”

I do and we’re walking out of the locker room a few minutes later.

Thankfully, the halls are empty except for a few stragglers by the time we make it to Chem. When I hesitate outside the door, Austin steps to the side, leaning against the wall.

“Look,” I shake my head. “I hate to ask and put you in this spot, but have you seen her? Kalani?” I ask him. “Or has Mia said anything? I just don’t want to go in there unprepared.” My shoulders drop, my head tilting to the ceiling. “I have no idea what to expect.”

Austin’s eyes narrow. “What are you hoping is gonna happen?”

“I have no fucking clue.” And I don’t. Not at all.

He sighs. “Sorry, bro, but I got nothing.” He shrugs. “Haven’t talked to Mia.”

My head jerks back. “Whoa. What? Why?”

“We were just having fun, man.” He kicks off the locker, clasping my shoulder as he reaches for the door handle, pulling it open.

He glances back at me. “Fun’s over.”

Damn straight.

When Kalani and Mia didn’t show to Chemistry, I figured they were attempting to avoid me, which I was grateful for, but when lunch rolled around and they were nowhere in sight, it was clear they played hooky today.

I look to my left just as Liv squeezes into the seat next to me.

“Hey. How is everything?” Her hand comes to rest on my shoulder, her blue eyes bright.

I shrug her off and sit back, stretching my legs out under the table. “Fine. What do you want?”

I give her credit, she doesn’t blanch at my abrasiveness, but smiles instead.

“Nothing, silly.” She bumps her shoulder into mine. “Just checking on you. I know you cared about her and I’m really sorry she messed with your head the way she did. You know, lying about having feelings for you and all.”

I scoff, pushing my chair back to stand. “Yeah. Right. Bye, Olivia.” With that, I toss my untouched pizza in the trash and exit the cafeteria.

By the time PE rolls around, it’s raining out, so class moves into the gym for free workouts.

After spotting each other on the bench press, Austin and I move to the ropes.

“You sure you’re alright, man?” he asks, his hands gripping the knot of the hanging rope, giving it a little tug.

“Honestly, no. I’m not.” I step back. “I gotta get outta here. I need to talk to her. She owes me an explanation.” I take two steps, then Parker’s in front of me.

“Yeah?” He steps into me. “She owes you an explanation?” His brows jump up his pretty boy forehead.

“She does! The shit she pulled on me.” I push into him with my chest. “You really gonna stand there and act like you don’t get some sick thrill out of this?” I accuse, narrowing my eyes. “You think you hide it, your feelings for her, but I see it. Seen it since day one.” I laugh bitterly, taking a step back. “You can have the lying-”

I don’t see it coming; his fist connects with my jaw, knocking me back a few steps.

Commotion roars around us, and the guys jump up, pulling us both back.

“You don’t know shit, Nate!” he hollers, jerking his body in attempt to free himself from Jarrod’s hold. “You obviously don’t love her like you claim if you didn’t even think to give her the benefit of the doubt!”

“Don’t act like you know shit!” I scream, trying to advance on him, but Austin’s grip tightens. “I heard what she said.” His brows pull in slightly. “I. Heard. Her.”

Parker’s body relaxes and he yanks his arms free of the bastard behind him. “Fuck you, Nate. I know Lolli well, but I’m not stupid enough to think I know her better than you. I can tell you, though, no matter what you think you know, think you heard, you’re wrong. Whatever it was, it hurt you. And the Kalani I know, would do anything to keep you from hurting. She’d never cause it.” He shrugs unapologetically, confidently, and my chest gets tight.

“You fucked up. Plain and simple.” He turns to leave, but stops, his jaw clenching. His eyes meet mine and he looks ready to throw another punch, but instead, he sighs. “She’s gone.”

My blood runs cold. “Gone. What do you mean, gone?”

He shakes his head, his gaze landing over my shoulder. “As in, gone. Not in Alrick.” His eyes come back to mine. “And you have no one to blame but yourself.” With that, he shoves through the nosy asses and exits the room, slamming the door behind him.

And I’m left standing there, more confused than ever.