DEAL
Raven
NOT SURE I could move, even if someone paid me a million bucks. Aftershocks from my last orgasm twitch through me as I recover on the thick floor pad. This squishy rubber makes a great mattress in a moment of need. I crane my neck to glance at Trey lounging next to me, wearing nothing but a satisfied smirk.
I clear my scratchy throat. “Well, that was . . .”
“Fan-fucking-tastic,” he finishes.
“You’ve got serious skills. Not sure I’ll ever be the same,” I confess.
“Fuck, yeah. My ears are still ringing from all your screaming.” He mimics my breathy voice when saying, “More, Trey. Please, harder.”
“Don’t be a cocky dick,” I laugh.
“What’s that? You want more?” He nudges against me. We’re naked and he’s still . . .
“How are you hard?” I question with a gasp.
He looks at me like the answer is clearly written on his penis. “I’m always horny. Plus, you’re smokin’ hot.”
My cheeks heat at his compliment. “Thanks, I think. You’re not so bad either.” My gaze trails from Trey’s dark hair to his scruffy jaw, down all those mouth-watering slabs of muscles lining his abdomen, and ending on that enormous—
“See something you like?”
My eyes snap up to his. “I’m totally busted, huh?”
He wags his brow. “Big time. I don’t mind though. Take your fill,” he says while humping the air.
My face bursts into flames, but I don’t back down. “Oh, I definitely am.”
“Don’t be afraid to admit it. What’s between us is combustible.”
My lips purse. “For tonight.”
Trey shakes his head. “Oh, no. I’ll need a few more times, at least. We’re just getting started, Princess.”
A knot forms in my chest as I contemplate that concept. How long can I do this without getting attached? Maybe we should make this a one-and-done deal. A strange prickle rolls up my arms as I consider ending this so quickly. I’m not sure what’s best.
He smooths the crease on my forehead. “You’re thinking way too much. This is uncomplicated fun. Nothing to worry about.”
Easy for him to say. Isn’t this type of arrangement always more difficult for women? I think of my mother, and nausea attacks my stomach. She’s had an endless list of flings while attempting to find the right man. I don’t want to be like that. What if this wrecks me for the long haul? I swallow heavily while trying not to curl into a protective ball.
I decide to follow his lead and force my muscles to relax. “Guess fooling around a bit longer won’t hurt,” I say softly.
“Exactly. I need to know what else this naughty princess has up her sleeve,” Trey muses while plucking my nipple.
I giggle and shuffle away, the tension disappearing as he shifts the mood. “Gah, no more. Pretty sure my body is in shock from all the pleasure.”
I blindly reach for my clothes and find his shirt instead. As I toss the fabric over my head and inhale his delicious woodsy cologne, another round seems like a great idea. I pull the material to my nose and breathe deeply, getting dragged into the earthy scent. When I look over, Trey is pulling up his briefs and snaps me out of the crazy hazy. Or so I thought.
As vulnerability cloaks around me again, I blurt a truth. “I’ve never, ah, done anything like this before.”
His complexion goes a little pale. “Please don’t tell me you were a—”
I hold up my palm. “No, I wasn’t a virgin, thank you very much. But I’m not very experienced. I’ve never had a random hookup and banging on the kitchen table is a tad out of my wheelhouse.”
Trey snorts. “I’d hardly consider this random. We’ve been crossing paths since you arrived. This was bound to happen.”
“And once we’re done, it’ll be hella awkward,” I mumble.
“Only if we let it be,” he says with a shrug. “When was the last time you had sex? No wait. A good, hard fuck.”
I cough at his abrupt change in topic. “Um, that’s none of your business.”
“Don’t be a prude, Princess. I’m just curious. Your dirty secrets won’t end up in the tabloids.”
I huff and shove his shoulder. “Don’t be a jerk.”
Trey chuckles. “I like that you call me out without being a bitch. It’s nice. But seriously, just tell me.”
I squint and tap my chin. “Well, there’s not much to share. The last time was months ago, maybe almost a year.” He looks shocked by that so I say, “Sex has never been that important to me. I’ve never understood why some people go so crazy for it. For me, it’s more about the emotional connection, the deeper feelings. Sex is purely physical without any intimacy attached. A few pumps, grunts, wham, bam, and it’s over. Love is more special.”
Trey blinks slowly before scrubbing a hand over his mouth. “Wow, that’s the saddest shit I’ve ever heard. The lazy saps you’ve fucked deserve a swift kick to the nuts. Good sex is everything, Princess. Yes, it’s a physical act, but chemistry and passion give the motions life. It’s a full body experience. You been doing it wrong, but I’m gonna change that.”
“Excuse me?” I sputter.
“You heard me. If you think sex isn’t important, there’s something missing. The limp dicks you’ve fucked haven’t done it right.” Trey tickles up my arm before cursing. “Jesus, I can’t believe the horrible injustice you’ve been subjected to. Someone needs to take care of you and put an end to this blasphemy.”
“Oh, and this is the part where you volunteer?”
“Damn straight.”
I cover my face and groan. “You’re so ridiculous.”
Trey shifts closer. “Why? Because I want to show you the light? What happened today was the tip of the iceberg. Pretty sure you said I’ve got mad skills. Let me show you all of them.”
My pulse goes berserk thinking about all the orgasms I could have with him. “I’m honestly not sure how to respond.”
“Just say yes. Let me be your sexpert.”
“My what?”
“Your sex expert,” he clarifies. “I’ll teach you all the good stuff. I know positions that will keep you coming constantly.” My thighs clench just thinking about that. Trey notices and smirks. “Uh huh, you like the sound of that? I’ll expand your mind while exploring your body. We’ve already experimented with food, but there’s plenty more where that came from. There’s toys and games to push your boundaries . . .”
I’m getting concerned that my lady bits will spontaneously combust. “Okay, stop right there. This seems like a weird thing to plan. Can’t we just have sex and see what happens? Like normal?”
Trey circles my elbow, making the slight touch erotic. I shiver and my nipples turn into pointed peaks, poking through his shirt. I have to stop myself from moaning when he leans forward and presses soft kisses up my neck.
“Your body thinks this is a great idea,” he whispers in my ear. Trey isn’t wrong. I’m ready to offer him whatever he wants when his fingers skim up my leg.
I manage to ask, “And what do you get out of this?”
He pulls away and stares at me with a blank expression. “Is that a serious question? I get to have sex with you.”
“With no feeling,” I mumble.
“Don’t get stuck on the fluffy shit. You’ll be feeling plenty.”
“That’s not my problem. I’m worried about getting too invested.”
Trey clucks his tongue. “Falling for me? Nah, that won’t happen. I’m an asshole, remember? No one can love me,” he says in a tone that leaves no room for argument. “But if you start heading down that path, we’ll stop. This won’t be anything serious, okay? We’ll have fantastic sex for a bit until you’re ready to move on.” He practically spits the last part out. I study his expression and find a sliver of frustration. Trey’s jaw tics as his nostrils flare. When he catches me looking, his features flatten like the aggravation was never there.
I decide to let his reaction go, for now, and bring up another concern with the sexpert thing. “Planning for sex seems odd. This entire situation makes me a tad queasy. Maybe it’s too much,” I mumble, resting on my knee.
“So, it’d be better if we spontaneously hook up when the mood strikes? Because I’m totally fine with that.”
I laugh. “You always know what to say. That does sound more natural. We’ve already discussed my satisfaction with your skills so far. And we’ve agreed to a few repeat performances. Pretty sure this topic is covered.”
“I’m glad you agree,” Trey hums.
I nod in response and silence settles in. Glancing around, I take stock of the epic disaster this place has become. Batter is dripping off the table, pots and pans are scattered on the floor, a bag of flour is ripped open, and the rest of our clothes are strewn about. It’s a hot damn mess. Pretty positive I’m not much better. Reaching up to smooth my hair, I attempt to get the madness in order. I peek over at Trey to find him watching me. My eyes focus on the ink coloring his right side. This is the first chance I’ve had to actually study it.
“Will you tell me about your tattoos?”
Trey’s posture visibly stiffens when my words register. He sucks in sharply. “Well, there’s a bullshit explanation I usually share.” His coffee eyes sear into me. “But maybe you’ll get the truth outta me, Princess.” He scrubs along his head and a rumble rises from him.
I touch his shoulder lightly. “You don’t have to tell me if it bothers you.”
He blows out a loud exhale. “It’s fine. I just . . . don’t talk about this shit. There’s something about you, Princess. Feels like I can talk to you.” His Adam’s apple bobs with a slow swallow. “This one,” Trey taps his pec, “is a combination of birthdates. The outer ring is my dad, my mom is second, and my sister is the center.”
I edge forward to get a better look as he describes it. The design is a bunch of Roman numerals forming three circles within one another. I reach out but stop before my fingers touch his skin. Trey grips me, halting my retreat, and places my palm over the tattoo.
“It’s okay,” he mumbles. “I’m not fucking fragile.”
“I never said you were,” I murmur.
He searches my face before saying, “The one down my ribs are tire tracks.” Trey moves my hand there. “My dad’s car was a piece of shit and always breaking down. He’d never sell it though, called that Mustang his first love. The accident was fatal because the brake line was broken. My dad couldn’t stop and smashed head first into a semi-truck. They all died on impact. These,” he brushes my fingers down his waist, “are a replica of the marks left on the road.” I gasp and press closer, needing to feel more of him. Trey rests his palm over mine before telling me more. “Jack went to the scene and took pictures. Didn’t show me for a few years, which was smart. He went with me on my eighteenth birthday to get the ink done.”
While gulping down emotion, words tumble out. “Wow, I’m not sure what to say. That’s so special and thoughtful. What an incredible way to honor them, Trey. If you ever want to talk about them, I’d love to hear more. It means a lot that you told me.” I want to smack my forehead for sounding desperate. “Just, thank you for trusting me with the truth.”
Trey smirks and brushes hair off my cheeks. “Flustered looks good on you, Princess. But it’s no big deal, I’m still sitting here. This is my life, and I’m used to it. Been dealing with this alone, other than Jack, but didn’t wanna bullshit you.”
I blink quickly, trying not to cry. Something tells me Trey wouldn’t appreciate my tears. I stare at the black tracks permanently etched into his skin and reflect on the significance. My mind swirls as I think about his family. Then, I think about my dad. Now seems like my chance to tell him—who knows if I’ll get another.
After clearing my throat, I go for it. “I’m really sorry for bringing them up that way at Jacked Up. I hadn’t apologized yet. I shouldn’t have mentioned them while we were fighting. My timing was rotten. I’m usually far more sensitive considering, um, well . . . I know how it is. I’ve experienced a horrific loss too.” I lick my lips and take a deep breath, unsure why there are nerves bubbling all about. Trey waits silently while I struggle, until finding comfort in his brown stare. “My dad was killed in a car accident. Drunk driver to be exact.”
“Fuck,” Trey curses. “I’m damn sorry, Princess. Do you, uh, wanna talk about it?” His gaze darts away before coming back to mine. “I’m really bad with this shit. Clearly.”
I cup his jaw, feeling a potent dose of intimacy in this moment. Invisible binds loop around us, the ends twisting together, and tying an indestructible knot. Maybe we won’t always get along, or even talk, but this type of bond is forever. I feel it down into my marrow.
My nails scratch against his coarse stubble, soaking in this strange sensation a bit longer. “I don’t have too much to tell about him. He died when I was five so even my memories are cloudy. But it was harder without him around, not having his presence and influence. Thinking about his death is terrible, but everything he’s missed makes me the most upset. All those what-ifs. Does that make sense?”
He nods into my palm. “It does, and I totally get it. This explains that understanding I see in you.”
Suddenly that glimmer I witnessed in Trey spreads wide open and the possibilities sparkle bright.
“Yeah, exactly. You don’t have to be alone, Trey. There are supportive people who care about what’s happened. It doesn’t have to be a solitary suffering,” I whisper.
He frowns, his brow falling low. “Don’t push it, Princess. I’m not interested in lasting relationships or companionship. Swapping sob stories is bad enough.”
My heart hurts hearing him say stuff like this. “Why do you feel that way?”
Trey scoffs, and his walls slam down. “Let’s not go there, all right? You caught me in a weak moment, but I’m not pouring out my soul.”
I watch his expressive features morph into an impassive mask. The thickness in the air threatens to strangle me, and it might be too late to protect my heart against this man. I break our connection by pulling my hands away and scooting back. The time for being close is over, especially when Trey is all but shoving me away. He doesn’t comment about my withdrawal, which isn’t surprising. But his words stop my fidgeting fingers from reaching for my clothes.
“How’s your mom? Are you guys close?”
I glance at him before focusing on a pile of flour on the floor. “Uh, she’s fine, I think. We don’t talk much.”
“Why not?” he prods.
I’m not sure why he’s asking, especially after shutting down my last question. My mother is a sore subject and difficult to talk about. But if knowing my story can help him, I’ll spill my guts. I take a moment to steel my resolve against the negativity that surrounds her.
Tilting my chin to the ceiling, I blow out a lungful of bad energy. “My mom never got over my dad’s passing. I lost a huge piece of her when he died. She became a hollow shell, shallow and plastic. Her attitude and personality changed dramatically, along with her life goals. She decided finding love was the answer but went about it the wrong way. With every new guy, she’d adapt to what he wanted. It was extremely upsetting to watch over and over. I learned pretty early that her priorities were out of whack, but she wouldn’t listen to me. It created a huge divide between us and now, the gap is bigger than an ocean. Literally,” I grumble.
“Damn, that sucks. I was hoping she made up for his absence and you lived happily ever after,” Trey says.
“Hardly. Maybe that’s why I’ve been more cautious and uninterested in sex. I’ve seen my mom use her body as a tool, and it makes me so sad. She puts out in hopes the guy will care about her. I don’t ever want to be like that,” I tell him honestly.
He groans. “Shit, you’re making me feel like a schmuck for sleeping with you.”
A humorless laugh tumbles out of me. “Don’t, seriously. I’ve come to terms with my mom and her type of dysfunction long ago. What we’re doing is different. Plus, this isn’t a habit for me, and I don’t plan to make it one.”
“Good, good. Not sure many could handle your claws,” he says while pointing to marks on his arm.
My jaw drops. “Holy shit. I did that?”
“You see any other wild women in this kitchen?”
I press over my scorching cheeks. “I’m so sorry. Wow, those are pretty deep.” My fingers trace a few of the scratches.
Trey shrugs. “I like it. Shows you were out of control. Also, makes me feel like I accomplished something else you haven’t done.”
“You’re a special case, all right.”
“As your sexpert and post-coital chat buddy,” he clarifies.
I flick his bicep, attempting to dissolve the remaining strain inside of me. “Yes, you jerk. Don’t worry, I won’t fall in love with you. I have no expectations of more from you.”
He wipes fake sweat off his forehead. “Glad that’s taken care of. I think this calls for a drink. You got anything good hiding around here?”
I make a show of scanning the room. “Uh, that’s a negative.”
“Didn’t think so. Let’s clean this up and I’ll buy you a beer.”
I relax, realizing this will work out. “That sounds just right.”