Zia… Greg’s Bedroom

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“Mmm…”

Zia tried to stop pawing at Greg as he deepened their kiss. It was no use. Her body did as it pleased. She accepted his ministry with a sensual awakening of mounting magnitude.

Her physical reaction to him was different than any other. Maybe things would be different this time?

A need, great and consuming, assumed control of her legs as they opened wide in invitation. One goal fueled her actions—to feel the length of his body against hers. Thankful for the range of motion the loose pair of sweats gave, she tested their give by opening wider. Zia wanted to make room for his impressive form to fit.

In tune as he always was, Greg moved to position himself between her legs. With better access, he took them to another level with a kiss that was out of this world.

The power of this exceptional kiss began to reveal itself. Greg was masterful in his pursuit of her pleasure. Her mind exploded, washed with electrical firings that were new and exciting. Zia’s body followed. The parade of heightened awareness and arousal marched down through its entirety.

In the wake of her neural-biological explosion, clarity and courage to see past self-erected camouflage emerged.

Zia didn’t quite understand the hormonal and neurological sorcery of oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin that erupted to race through her body, but what she did clue into was how connected their union grew.

The normal tightening of her muscles to guard against the coming darkness didn’t happen. Fear of a complete shutdown and betrayal of her body seemed like a tale from a fabled time of her life.

Haunting thoughts from her past didn’t debilitate and crush her ability to exist as they normally did. For the first time, Zia could dare to remember events from her past that changed her without shutting down. She owed this to Greg and his magical effect on her.

As if taming the vicious wraiths of death from last night’s nightmare, Greg once again proved his might. Each kiss he gave swatted back her ill thoughts and feelings as they came her way. She was in new territory. A new awareness replaced Zia’s inability to handle her past.

Yes, the knowledge of what she’d done might as well be a spotlight shining her guilt for all to judge. But she didn’t have the urge or need to run from it, try to ignore it or pretend to be someone else. Without having to say it, she knew Greg was true to his word. He was a good person, but how much could he forgive?

“Stay with me, Zia. I sense you slipping behind your barrier.”

Greg was a quick learner. His accuracy of assessing her mood and tone was spot on. The man read her like a book. Thoughts of his ability to read her mind quickly eroded to make room for the next wave of internal scrutiny.

Until now anything passed a chaste kiss had her backing out of the encounter. She'd feign a headache or some other malady that couldn’t be discredited by her male suitor.

Sexual intimacy always triggered the darkness until now. Greg was able to reach and pull her back to safety. He was her golden giant. Would he stay if he knew the truth?

Too moved by the sexual energy flowing through her body to stop herself, Zia would see how much farther this could go before she had to fess up. The proof of whether he’d still want her as his mate hinged on Greg knowing the truth—the truth that she still couldn’t bring herself to face or speak of.

“Ooh,” she found herself cooing when he released her lips to plant a trail of kisses down her neck.

“You are my heart,” he said low and sexy, as each of his kisses branded her with his intense body heat.

His seduction was methodical and layered in its administration. Deeper and deeper Zia fell into this special space they alone shared. Stripped down to remove all remaining barriers of protection, deceit, and grand illusion, Zia put up no resistance to the memories that collided and clashed within.

Her body trembled from the onslaught of thoughts, sexual energy, awareness of changes to her ability to handle trauma and too many other happenings to name. Greg was right there with her, holding her in the safety of his large, strong embrace. As if coaxed through the trance of his calming presence, Zia’s thoughts took shape to produce sound. The sound turned into words, and the words filled her until they could be held back no longer.

Words of the self-loathing she’d denied for so long filled her mouth as they forged their way up and out. Solid and thick, the acrid words refused to be restrained any longer.

“I’m not a good person like you.”

“Good is relative, and I’m not as good as you think.” Greg’s response helped a little to urge her onward.

Admitting to him what she was and how she felt was the dreaded process she’d avoided and hidden from for far too long. Zia had to get this out before they went any farther. She owed it to him to give Greg a chance to stop this before it was too late for him to move on to another mate.

“No, I’m serious. You need to know that I’ve done things that aren’t good. I don’t deserve you—not with how good you are. I’m not on that level.”

“Shh,” was all he said and placed another kiss to bring her deeper onto their intimate island.

Need to show him the real side that no one else saw drove her onward. He had to know how she thought of herself and her place in life. “I didn’t believe you existed, that someone like you could love me. Greg, I’m not… I’m not what you hope I am. I’m damaged.”

“And, I’m an alien who can’t touch normal humans without inflicting pain. Yet, here we are. Zia, you are exactly who I want, love and need. As for damaged, that’s a connotation with a bad rap. Your damaged is someone else’s flair.”

A light laugh floated up to relieve more of the raw vulnerability of her confession. He might be right. Weak as it was, courage lit a fire of hope in her belly to continue to tell him of her dark side. “I’m so sorry for not believing you’d come for me. I couldn’t imagine you’d ever want me. Quinn was right. I’ve done bad things. Things that are still hard to believe sometimes, but true. That’s why I don’t deserve you or true happiness. I keep waiting for the nightmare to come and destroy any good that tries to come between you and me.”

“We’re stronger together, my love. Never believe you don’t deserve anything. We are well met. Now, please, for me, stop your worrying. You’re my mate, and I’m yours. Stay with me.”

“Always,” she found herself saying, not sure she’d be able to live up to that proclamation.

For his part, Greg moved to place kisses on the other side of her neck. His touch was as confident as it was sure and yet therapeutic. Each kiss acted as a pressure valve, releasing pent-up energy that felt fetid and acrid. She felt a bit of relief from that bit of poisoned memories that released some of it’s choking pressure off of her soul.

She couldn’t stop the flow as more confessions poured forth. “I don’t deserve you. I’ve done horrible things. You’re the best man to have ever wanted me.”

“There is nothing you’ve done that could keep us apart if you accept me as your mate.” His words were earnest and full of the truth.

Her old frenemy, fear with a healthy dash of dread, attempted to set up shop.

Not today, not today.

With boldness from somewhere new, she locked eyes with his and said, “I can handle whatever you need me to. You’re my Gryphon, and I trust you.”

“Zia, I need you to trust in us and the power we produce together. We,” he said making emphasis on that last word, “Are in this together. I can only do what you’re willing and able to face. This is a project for the two of us together. Do you understand?”

“I think so. What are you going to do?”

“The Goddess has directed me to assist you in realigning your essence. You don’t have to give me details, but know that I see you. The Goddess has given me a bit of her wisdom to sense great hurt and pain that lives deep within. As your mate, I can help you heal and repair the broken parts—if you’re willing.”

Before she could think to keep it to herself, Zia’s words flowed like molten lava down a steep side of a volcano. “I can’t. No—I’m not able to allow you to see or know that part of me. It’s too painful. I need to move on and keep the past in the past.” Her head unconsciously shook side to side to punctuate her words.

“You don’t have to speak of what happened, only allow me to help you regain every part of you that suffered. Zia, where you’re concerned, I always pursued your true essence. Your true self is who caught my heart; not the outward presentation that might have caught lustful human male attention. I told you before, and I repeat it, I see you—the real you. Your beauty is not the collection of outward attributes. They are comely to be sure. It’s who you are for eternity, your soul and spirit, that is the true beauty.”

The universe’s agreement with their joining choreographed a show. It unfolded in perfect timing. Sunlight rays spilled in through the slats of the window blinds. They brightened the natural light that flowed into the minimalist bedroom. The effect lifted her mood enough to challenge her belief. Zia had to consider what he said as truth she could have faith in.

He continued to press his case, “I’m here to pursue your heart way more than to feast on you with my eyes. I want to join with you, heart to heart before anything else—please? You are my heart, and nothing you reveal is going to make me leave. We’re bound by a true mating. I’m here to stay.”

A little pop, so subtle it might have been her ears releasing pressure, went off. Fear and dread were hamstrung and pushed back enough for her to say, “Yes, let’s do this.”

With a nod of acknowledgment, Greg smiled and brushed her lips with his own again. He rose enough to lean on one elbow. Then, he placed his massive palm on the center of her chest above the rising mound of her bra-clad breasts.

Invisible tingles of life poured into her, giving Zia the feeling of an energy infusion.

“Breathe in life and exhale all that no longer serves you. Our bonding as mates will be your protection. Trust in us, my love.”

She did as he asked, taking time to inhale and exhale with concentrated determination. To her amazement, each cycle of her breathing did feel deeper, wider, and freer.

“Keep going. I sense more that is deep-rooted,” he instructed.

She continued to breathe in as tears welled up and poured out. To his credit, Greg never paused to ask about the tears, instead, kept administering life to her.

As the soothing relief overcame doubt and worry, Zia sensed an opening in every part of her existence. Her body arched up into his palm. Her memories spun through an internal picture show of images she’d fought long and hard to subdue.

“That’s it. I’m here with you. Breathe, my love.”

“What’s happening to me? I don’t want to see this.” She spoke of images flashing fast without a stop in her mind’s eye.

“It is the Goddess’ bless gift of an intimate cleansing. As mates, we can bring healing to one another. We are the power fueling this, with the help and blessing of the Goddess. Trust us, remember that always.”

She dared to believe him. The burning sting of shame, guilt, and anger started to dissipate to bearable levels.

The time had come. Closing her eyes for a moment to gather all the strength she had, Zia took a long, deep breath.

When she released it and steadied herself, Zia spoke.