Keyes held Alec wrapped in his arms, unwilling to let him go as he stared up at the ceiling watching the shadows from the rain striking the window. Alec seemed content in his arms and pressed his lips against Keyes’s neck while settling down on their shared pillow. Alec’s breath tickled his skin in perfectly timed puffs that served to enhance the blissful relaxation he’d gained from such an intense orgasm. This moment was right. He could never deny how well they came together. How could something feel so right but be so wrong? He wasn’t sure. What he did know was that he’d been a stupid ass motherfucker for staying away so long.
He had to remember this moment, etch all the details permanently in his brain to help get past the extreme insecurity he faced after leaving. Whatever happened outside these walls truly didn’t matter. He had to learn to relax and go with the flow where Alec was concerned. He’d put himself through hell, denied himself so much happiness, for no apparent reason. He needed to be here for however long Alec wanted him. No one had to know. He kept secrets from his brothers all the time—
Fuck, his brothers could never find out. Not even Dev…
Alec shifted on top of him, pressing his lips closer to Keyes’s ear. “Your heartbeat’s accelerating. Stop whatever you’re thinking unless it’s the anticipation of me inside you. Then carry on.”
Keyes smiled and turned them so they were side by side, facing each other, but keeping Alec aligned toe to chest against his body, his arms still wrapped possessively around the guy. Alec copied his intent, his palm and fingers threading into Keyes’s hair. He liked this angle. He would never get his fill of looking at the man. Keyes leaned in, kissing Alec. Alec followed when he pulled away, giving him a softer, lingering press of the lips. It was this, the cuddling thing that showed just how different everything was with Alec. Keyes didn’t cuddle, but he couldn’t keep his hands off Alec.
“You think you know me so well to know what I’m thinkin’?”
“I’m trying to learn. I don’t ever want to go through what I did the last few weeks,” Alec said, his warm hand cupping Keyes’s neck.
“It was hard on me too. I drank a lot.”
“Did you get my text?” Alec asked.
Keyes paused. Would it hurt Alec that he had ignored him? Because he hadn’t at all. The opposite actually. He’d read that text every single day, so he answered truthfully, “I did.”
The silence between them became unbearably deafening as Alec stared at him. Keyes was so in tune with this man he could feel uncertainty and resounding hurt radiating from Alec—another new development in this bond forming between them.
“Everyone kept on about how I smelled.”
Alec’s sandy blond brows slid together, confusion marring his handsome face as he tried to understand how those two sentences worked together. If it weren’t for the gravity of the situation, Keyes would have smiled.
“Then I thought about everything. How you were clean and I was the dirty one. It was like the universe was tryin’ to tell me we didn’t fit, even for just a casual fuck. It freaked my shit out.”
Alec’s silence continued. He was so good at words it made a smile tug at the corner of Keyes’s mouth as he waited for Alec to understand.
“You smelled like me?” Alec finally asked.
“Not sure. I guessed my clothes you washed, maybe your shower gel. Maybe because I was happy and my old man can’t stand to see me happy.”
Alec’s brows furrowed again. “Old man for father, right? We established that earlier, correct?”
Keyes chuckled at him, remembering the conversation in front of the washing machine before. He lifted a finger, running the tip down the crease between Alec’s still wrinkled brow. It helped his heart to have Alec territorial, even if it was unfounded. “I bet you’re a demon in the courtroom. I want you to defend me if shit ever goes bad.”
“Don’t change the subject. So you left here, got shit for smelling like me… Seriously, don’t they bathe in this bike club?”
He busted out another much louder laugh and lifted a hand between them, giving his oath. “Every day. Make sure the clothes are clean, too. I don’t know what really happened there. I just know that when I was here, everything was okay, I thought it could work. When I got back to the shop, I freaked. They made me doubt myself and made me feel like trash and that grew from there.”
Alec moved, placing a hand on Keyes’s pec, pushing him to his back. Alec rose above him, balancing himself on his arms, a serious, almost angry look on his face as he stared down at Keyes. “You’re not trash, Key. You’re a man of great quality. I’m an excellent judge of character. I would never spend time with anything less.”
Ah hell, his heart did a little flip at how Alec tried to protect his feelings. Keyes’s hands went to Alec’s stern face, running the pads of his thumbs over Alec’s smooth cheeks. “That’s a stretch, even for you and all your fancy sentences,” he managed, while drawing Alec to his lips. “I haven’t had an easy life. I don’t have anything to offer. I get it. I just never felt bad about that before…”
“Continue, please,” Alec immediately encouraged, settling on his chest. “Go on. Finish what you were saying. I need to know what happened.”
Keyes didn’t want to. Not at all. Alec waited. So did he, until he finally swallowed a lump in his throat, and spoke, “My life’s not what anyone would choose, but it’s mine. I’m me, and I’m good with that. It’s enough. Even with my old man’s constant beatdown, I never felt less than before.”
“Do you still feel that way?” Alec questioned.
“Oh yeah,” he answered honestly.
“Did I make you feel that way?”
“No, not at all. It’s all me. It’s why I’m here right now. I figured out it was my fuckin’ hang-up. You’re a good guy, and you asked me back,” Keyes explained.
“How can we dispel all of those feelings?” Alec asked. He was so damn smart and sincere, always looking for the whys and how he could help. Keyes tightened his hold on Alec. He really liked this man and had never known anyone else like him before.
“I don’t know. What you said in the livin’ room is what I’ve been goin’ through. It’s weird. This connection between us is different than just fuckin’ someone,” he answered, not even worried about revealing such an intimate truth. Alec was like magic. He held special powers. Not only was Keyes talking, he was also being honest while expressing feelings of all things.
“I agree. Unexpected,” Alec said. “I don’t want to resist or fight it.”
“Where were you tonight?” Keyes asked. Alec’s face changed. Keyes wasn’t as keen at reading moods as Alec and lost his chance when Alec lowered his head to Keyes’s chest, kissing him on the heart.
“I swiped right.”
Keyes’s whole body tensed as a rush of jealousy threatened to suffocate him. He’d been going through hell, and Alec was out hooking up with other guys? Two palms landed on his pecs as Keyes started to rise. The anger surging through him was different than anything before. He was red-hot mad and wanted out of this fucking bed. Had Alec just fucked another guy and crawled into bed with him? His brain exploded, shooting stars sprinkling his vision.
“No, stay here. I went on one date with one guy who I bailed on. I left him sitting at dinner and came home. I wanted him to be you. He wasn’t.”
That didn’t fucking help. Keyes drew in a long breath, needing calm. As much as he wanted out of this bed was as much as he wanted to tie Alec to this bed and fuck him so well he never wanted to leave again.
“I was trying to process all this, and you weren’t calling me or making any contact. I felt that was your way of blowing me off. I didn’t like it. I told myself I needed to move on. That’s it. Hell, he might still be sitting at the table waiting for me to come back.”
Keyes dropped his head back on the pillow. He was such a stupid dumbass. He scrubbed a hand over his face, trying to process the residual anger, but it was hard. “God, that made me jealous.”
“Thank you for saying that.” Alec pulled from his arms, and he didn’t like that one bit. Alec wasn’t going anywhere. Keyes grabbed hold of the guy as Alec started laughing at him, fighting him as he scooted off the mattress. “You haven’t eaten. Come on. Let me see what I have. I’ve fancied myself a chef. Bought all the best equipment for my kitchen, took some lessons, but I have to confess, I’m not as good as I hoped to be.”
He stared after Alec, watching that perfect, naked ass disappear behind the bathroom wall. Alec came back into the room with a robe and laid it on the bed. Another crack of thunder boomed outside, shaking the house. The lights dimmed before plunging the room into darkness.
“Great, we lost power. Guess that saves you from anything I might try to prepare for dinner.”
“We could sleep. I haven’t done much of that,” Keyes suggested, not moving more than necessary to hook an arm under his head. He was too comfortable.
“We can sleep when we aren’t together,” Alec said from the end of the bed, running a finger up Keyes’s foot from heel to toe. The move was effective, unexpectedly tickling, sending a shiver through his body before he had a chance to control his reaction.
“Hey!” Keyes quickly rolled from bed, placing his feet on the cold hardwood floors.
“I know I have the components for a sandwich. My refrigerator’s full. My housekeeper spends a mint on groceries to feed just one person.”
“You have a housekeeper?” Keyes said, reaching for his jeans instead of the robe. Alec didn’t seem to have a problem going nude. Keyes wasn’t of the same mindset. Hell, before he met Alec, the only time he was ever completely undressed was in the shower.
“I have two. And a yard crew and a pool boy. You’ll like him. He’s not really a pool boy as much a pool bear, but he’s hot regardless.”
Keyes watched Alec leave the room, trying hard to ignore the implications of all the paid labor Alec had. He didn’t fit here but hadn’t been able to stay away. He was so fucked.
=♥=
“It’s pouring outside,” Alec said with his head stuck in the refrigerator, the only light coming from a newly purchased, super techy portable LED flashlight now strategically placed in the center of the stovetop to help give the whole room a decent glow. He pulled out various lunch meats, cheeses, lettuce, tomatoes, pickles. Alec topped the stack with a jar of mayo, then grabbed the mustard, before shutting the door with his elbow.
“You shouldn’t open the refrigerator door when the electricity’s off,” Key advised. His snug-fitting jeans rode low, and with the top button undone, that swath of skin reminded Alec of the lack of underwear beneath that lucky piece of denim. Key bypassed him, going to the kitchen sink to wash his hands. Alec tracked his movement, watching as Keyes glanced at him from over his shoulder. “I can help.”
“You’re sexy.” Alec grinned and gave Key a wink. Key only laughed and shook his head before leaning closer to the faucet to splash the cold water on his face. Alec dumped everything he’d gathered on the counter and went for the linen drawer to grab a kitchen towel for Key. Alec watched Keyes closely. Now that they had agreed to continue whatever this was, he looked forward to learning all the little nuances of this man.
As he stared at the handsome man at his sink, it clicked—something was different from their first night. He looked closer. How had he missed the trimmed beard? Alec reached for Key’s hair, letting a long strand glide through his fingers. They weren’t as long as they’d once been, maybe by a couple of inches.
“When did you get a haircut?”
Key smiled, wiping at his beard with the towel.
“You’re fishin’,” Key answered, and Alec had no idea what that meant. The moment ended with Key giving him a quick peck on what had to be Alec’s confused face before he tossed the towel aside and sifted through the lunch meat options on the counter.
“How am I fishing? What am I fishing for?” Alec followed Key, mentally shuffling through what fishing for could mean to Key.
“You really don’t know?” Key asked, glancing over at him.
“Know what?” Alec asked, crossing his arms over his chest, leaning back against the kitchen counter next to Key.
“When I finally decided I was really comin’ this afternoon, I left the shop early and got trimmed. They even did my eyebrows. Hurt like a motherfucker,” Key said, furrowing his brow in Alec’s direction so he could survey the work. “Got bread?”
Alec took a good look at Key’s face. Took in the subtle differences and placed a hand on his cheek, feeling the softness of his recently trimmed beard. “I like this. It defines your face better. You’re handsome.”
“Look at you, buttering me up,” Key teased with a twinkle in his eye as he lifted his forefingers in front of Alec’s face, miming a square. “I think we’re missin’ something to make this sandwich.”
Bread. “Oh yeah. In the pantry.” Alec pointed toward the pantry before he turned that way, going for the bread, grinning at this new side to Key, playing with him like it was the most natural thing in the world.
“She said I needed a defined line where the beard started, so she shaved me. Seems like a lot of unnecessary work to me,” Key said over his shoulder as he started moving around the kitchen, opening drawer after drawer.
“So, how was I fishing?” Alec asked, laying two different kinds of bread on the counter as Key found what he was looking for and pulled a knife out of the silverware drawer.
“I did it for you,” he answered casually, reaching for the mustard.
“You went to get a shave for me?”
Key again cut his gaze away from the preparation of the sandwich back toward Alec, a mischievous smile parting his lips. “You’re fishin’ again.” One nicely plucked brow arching.
Maybe as much as a minute passed before Alec leaned back against the counter again, and said, “I’m still not following.”
“I’ll say it, but you can’t call me needy or whatever I’ll be,” Key said, waving the mustard-covered butter knife in Alec’s direction. “You’re so good lookin’ I wanted to get myself as together as I could. I wanted to look better for you. I know it’s not much, but you said you liked the long hair and beard. Otherwise, I probably would have cut it all off,” Key explained.
The explanation, along with the well-placed compliments, eased any lingering doubts as to why Key had finally shown up tonight. Alec had been told his whole life that he was easy on the eyes. That never mattered more until this man thought it. Now, he understood the fishing comment.
“If you cut your hair, what would you do when you’re thinking?” Alec asked absently, basking in the glow of Key’s words while watching Key work. He piled ham, American cheese, lettuce, tomato, and pickles on his sandwich, and Alec tried to make a mental note of Key’s selections.
He wished he could see Key’s face better to view for himself what Key thought about him having already picked up on the way Key piled his hair on top of his head when he became unsure of things. It took a second for him to answer.
“You catch on quick.”
“It’s part of the job.” Alec grinned. He was grinning a lot since Key had arrived.
“Then you were fishin’,” Key teased, finally looking his way, giving him a knowing wink. “Do you wanna sandwich?”
“No, I ate.”
“With him.” The words sounded very close to an accusation, and Alec laughed as he went to the cupboard for a plate. He came back to Key who’d gathered all the food in his arms. Alec reached out, opening the refrigerator door, and Key dumped everything on the top shelf, quickly shutting the door behind him. Whatever Key saw on Alec’s face caused him to say, “I’ll organize it better when the electricity comes back on. I didn’t want to waste the cold.”
“You catch on quick.” Alec used Key’s words to joke about his need for constant organization. He put the sandwich on a plate, handing it over. “Where do you want to eat?”
“Here’s fine.” Key went around the kitchen bar and took a seat on the other side. Alec only had eyes for Key, tracking everything he did. He loved watching the man, from the way he took the seat to his forearms resting just on the edge of the counter as he started to eat. Alec got stuck on the expansive ink covering his bare chest.
“You’re an interesting man. You’re comfortable now?” Alec asked, lifting his gaze from the defined pecs to stare Key in the eye.
“Should I not be?” Key asked before taking a big hearty bite.
“No, you should be. It’s just there’s a big difference in the on-guard Key and the relaxed one,” Alec said, reaching for a napkin, sliding it across the bar. Key lifted one of those cleaned-up brows, looking slightly bewildered as he took another bite. “You talk more. You tease. You act different when you’re comfortable.”
Key nodded, still chewing.
“I like it. Need a drink?” Alec didn’t wait for the answer. He went back to the refrigerator, opening the door quickly so Key didn’t scold him again, and handed a beer over as he asked, “How old are you?”
“These seem like relationship questions,” Key said, not answering the question before twisting the cap off the bottle and turning it up to take a long drink.
“I thought we defined that when I arrived,” Alec countered, propping his elbows on the granite countertop then leaning on them, his gaze focused on Key.
“Yup. So what are the rules?” Key asked, taking another bite then swiping the napkin off the counter to wipe his lips.
“Okay, well, I haven’t gotten that far. I think I’d like for you to agree to spend at least one night a week over here—two if I can get it. We can plan that night as we go,” Alec suggested. It seemed reasonable.
“My shop’s open every day.”
Alec nodded his understanding, not sure how that comment fit what they were discussing, but he accepted that piece of information.
What else would he like from Key?
“Based on the last few weeks, honestly, I’d like some sort of contact every day. At least for a while. You wrecked my confidence. I’m feeling kind of needy.”
Key lifted a hand to cover his full mouth as he barked out a laugh. He took another drink, clearing his throat before saying. “I wrecked your confidence? Let’s see. Since the last time I was here, I moved out of my house, kicked my old man out of his business, got in three fights, drank more than any other time in my entire life. If I could’ve ripped my heart out of my chest, I would have. I haven’t slept much at all, and I fuckin’ hate all these feelin’s I keep feelin’. Then to top it all off”—Key did a little circle motion with his finger, pointing to his face and hair—“I went to a hair salon on the rich side of town. Me. This.” Key motioned up and down his body. “My pop really thought I smelled like a chick when I got to work that day, but that has nothin’ on what those hairstylists did to me. I’ve never had any sort of ego. Live and let live. But meetin’ you made me feel like dirt, so I win the wrecked confidence award.”
Alec had rested his chin on his palm, enjoying all the sentences Key strung together until he got to the last one, and his brows slid together. That seemed to happen a lot when Key spoke. “Me? How did I make you feel like dirt?”
“I said meetin’ you made me feel that way. Because you’re fuckin’ gorgeous and refined and too good to be true.”
Okay, Alec liked hearing that. He let that sit between them, committing everything about those sweetly muttered words to memory while his battered heart healed from the inside out. “Without saying I’m fishing, what does too-good-to-be-true mean to you?”
Key stayed quiet, finishing off his sandwich and taking another long drink while holding Alec’s gaze with an all-knowing smirk on his face.
“You aren’t going to answer, are you?”
Key just shook his head no. Alec sighed, accepting defeat on getting that answer. For now. Another point added to the long list of reasons Key was perfect for Alec. He challenged him at every turn. He had to work at understanding this smart, complicated man. Boy, did that turn him on.
The electricity blinked on. Alec lifted his gaze to make sure the lights stayed on then reached for Key’s empty plate before turning to place it in the sink.
“What other rules you got?” Key asked, wiping his napkin over his mouth then over his beard.
“I can’t think of anything more but reserve the right to add as we go,” Alec answered, switching off the flashlight, grateful for the granite barrier between them, because more than anything, Alec wanted to climb up on that big strong guy and make out like he had when he was a teenager. He wanted to do that a lot when Key was around.
“So once a week even though I gotta get up for work?” Key said, resting his elbows on the counter, leaning in like Alec had done before.
“At the very least once a week. Twice is better, and if you show up for a quickie, I’ll count that as three times in a week, and that’s fine too,” Alec amended.
“And more communication, like textin’,” Key clarified, wadding up the napkin, moving it back and forth between his hands as he stared at Alec.
“Yes.” He nodded his confirmation to that stipulation. “And to add to the quickie thought, if you need a quickie, you call me first, and vice versa, I’ll call you.”
“Are you fuckin’ other people?” Key asked. The seriousness was back on his handsome face as his gaze pinned Alec to his spot.
If he said no, absolutely not, did that scream clinger? Well, he had become a serious clinger to this man still staring him down. It took maybe as long as a full minute before Alec could respond. “I don’t think I want to answer that.”
Alec turned back to the sink to rinse off the plate. In his peripheral vision, he caught Key’s shadow passing around the bar until the length of Key’s body pressed heavily against his, boxing him in against the sink and counter as he leaned into his neck and, with a possessive growl against his ear, asked, “Are you doin’ anyone else?”
Alec just kept his head lowered, eyes closed, and what had to be a goofy smile spreading across his lips. His heart was so happy and full. “I’m not doing anyone but you. If that changes, you’ll be the first to know. Now say it back.” Alec turned, and the hands resting on the counter on each side of him moved, pushing between Alec and the counter, sliding down to cup his ass.
“It back,” Key teased, squeezing his ass.