Ebony
“You want to join the dating agency?” Kim gave me a look of disbelief. “But you’ve had a vision you were getting married anyway so what’s the point?”
Lucy threw a paperclip at her. “We don’t turn down customers, dumb ass. I’m opening the application form online as we speak.” She said.
“We can’t ask Ebs to pay. She’s one of the main reasons the dating agency exists.” Kim moaned. “So we’d be working for free.”
“God, I wish I could still shoot flames out of my fingers so I could fire one under your lazy ass. Sorry, Ebony. Kim is having far too much sex at the moment and because she doesn’t have a healthy diet, she’s tired all the time. Whereas me and Frankie are at it like rabbits so I eat lots more fruit and veg, especially carrots. Rabbits, carrots. You get it?” She giggled.
“Bring back the bloody demon.” Kim groaned. “Your jokes are worse than anything you did in Hell.”
Lucy looked at me and bit her lip and I knew what she was thinking. No matter the circumstances, her actions had led to the death of my mother.
“Application form opened. So Ebony. Your full name, please.”
“Ebony Yolanda Walker.”
Lucy carried on recording my personal details including my address and family history.
“Okay, let’s get onto potential ideal date questions. What’s your favourite food?”
“Caviar and smoked salmon blinis accompanied by a lovely glass of champagne.”
“Erm, okay. And would Prosecco and a fish finger sandwich do at a push?”
“I suppose.”
“Ideal dating venue?”
I sucked on my top lip for a moment. “Theatre, day at the races, high tea. Anything like that.”
Kim looked at Lucy and burst into a fit of laughter. “Glad you agreed to take her on now? Good luck with getting her a date. It’s Withernsea not Windsor.”
Lucy sighed. “Okay, if you could take a moment now to fill in this part of the application form for me. I’ll input it into the computer afterwards.” She passed me the sheet attached to a clipboard, along with a pen.
I looked down at it, Reason for Application. I began.
For the past few years I have been so troubled with visions that I did not believe romance was indeed part of my future. However recent visions have shown me that I am to be married at some point though I know not to whom. Therefore I would like to actively seek out romantic encounters so that I might learn who my future intended is.
My visions are currently coming without pain and so I am not having to consume copious amounts of vodka which could render me unable to speak properly on a date. Thus it is an ideal time for me to look for a partner.
Thank you for considering my application.
I handed it over to Lucy who began to type it in. “So your visions are coming without pain? That must be a relief?”
“It really is. I feel like I’m getting to be me.”
Lucy smiled. “That’s wonderful, Ebony.”
Kim tilted her head at me. “You know your visions, Ebs?”
“Yes.”
“You don’t actually see yourself married in them do you? You’re just standing in a wedding dress.”
I thought back. It was true. In fact in my most recent vision, my intended was missing.
“Err, yes, that’s correct.”
“So maybe you get jilted, Ebs. We have to consider the possibility that the groom either doesn’t show or is a result of a hallucination from too much vodka.”
“Kim! You’ve gone too far.” Lucy yelled.
“I’m just looking out for my friend. She needs to not focus so much on her vision and start living her life now she’s pain free.”
“I see what you’re getting at, Kim, although it’s delivered in your usual delicate flower like way.”
Lucy snorted.
“Go on these dates to enjoy yourself, Ebs. Not to question if every single one is your future husband. That’s all I’m saying.”
“So be free, single, and ready to mingle.” I winked at her.
“You got it, babes. Now go book in at a beauty salon and get everything freshened up.”
“I already am ‘freshened up’. It’s part of my routine to look elegant everywhere at all times.”
“So bare, hair, or landing strip there? Personally I rate a landing strip so they know where they’re aiming for.” Kim stood, motioning with her arms like an air hostess. “Please take note of the areas here, here, and here.”
“I take it this is not part of the official application form?” I said to Lucy.
Lucy shook her head. “You know that vodka you don’t need any more, Ebony…?”
“It’s behind my shop counter whenever you need it.” I rose from my seat.
“Thank you, ladies. It’s been… interesting. I shall look forward to seeing whomever the computer matches me up with.”
“I’ll be in touch shortly about your first date.” Lucy said.
“Right, I’d better get back to the farm because there are a lot of visitors due to arrive at eleven.”
“Oh yes, could you give Shelley this card and present from me and tell her I’d love to visit but I’ll need to make sure her mum and dad aren’t going to be around. It could be a little awkward.”
“Sure.”
“Oh yeah, her adoptive parents are visiting today aren’t they?” Kim suddenly remembered.
“Yes, and the Duke of Wyvern Sea and his son.”
“Hey, how old are they? Maybe one of them is your future husband, Ebs?”
A slow smile crept across my face. Not mine, Kim. Not mine.
I returned to the house and went to fix myself a drink. All that talking had proved to be thirsty work. I really ought to have called in at the coffee shop but time was passing quickly. Unfortunately Henry also happened to be in the kitchen, Mary at his side. “Please be careful with the cups, Henry. Some have been in the family for years. We don’t want chips.” She turned to me. “Oh fantastic. Please can you educate Henry here on the importance of fine china, Ebony? Only I must dash.” Her body went a little translucent, and she left the room before Henry could notice.
“Thought you were going to be here to make my drinks? Then I wouldn’t need to be having my every move watched. I’m quite okay with this mug but she even kicked off about me using that.” He pointed to a mug that said This isn’t coffee with blood splatters on the front.
“Oh that was a gift from Theo to Shelley.” I picked it up and placed it back in the cupboard. “Here, use this one.” I passed him an orange mug.
“Have you automatically gone for that because I’m ginger?” He raised a brow. Then placing his mug next to the kettle, he went in the cupboard rummaging and brought out a black mug which he passed to me. “Here you are.”
“You’re such a child. I don’t know why I bothered to try to help you.” Filling up the kettle, I switched it on and then I remembered my vision.
I rested back against the worktop. “Did you have a nice time at Beached the other night?”
The skin around Henry’s eyes bunched, and he rubbed the back of his neck. I noted his hands clenched into fists. “Not exactly.”
“Oh. Sorry.” I busied myself putting coffee in my cup. “Tea for you?” I asked him.
“Yes please. Strong, one sugar, plenty of milk.”
There was silence as we waited for the kettle to boil.
“She didn’t show and then I got a text while I was there. She dumped me by text.” He shook his head. “Two years and that’s what I was worth. And do you know why she’d wanted to go to Beached? Because she was shagging one of the bar staff there. Had been for the last six months. She wanted me to meet her there so she could show him what he was missing by not committing to her. Except he did. He proposed. So it was bye bye, Henry.”
“I’m so sorry, Henry.”
His expression changed, becoming guarded. “Anyway, it was nothing to do with your psychic shit. Just that she was a cheating bitch. Best thing is, I’d been thinking of dumping her for ages. Things were stale.”
“Maybe that’s why she did what she did? Though I don’t condone cheating.” I’d switched the kettle off just before it boiled, adding water to my mug and then flicked it back on.
“Why’d you do that?” He pointed to my mug.
“Coffee is better if it’s almost boiled, not completely.”
He huffed. “Thought you’d be drinking Earl Grey from a china teacup.”
I bristled. “Yes, I like nice things and I was brought up around money, but I’ve worked in my boutique for years now. I’m not some pampered princess.” I shoved his mug towards him. “The kettle’s boiled, make your own tea, because you’re no Prince Charming either.”
I stormed out of the kitchen. God that man. How had Jax put up with being his younger sister? I’d bet he used to push her off swings and chase her with spiders and frogs. Anyway, I had much more important things to do than make tea for that imbecile. The visitors were due any moment. I made my way to my room to freshen up before they all arrived.