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Holding On (Haven, Montana Book 3) by Jill Sanders (1)

Chapter 1

You know those feel-good movies that start with the heroine driving down a long highway in a convertible, the wind blowing her long hair while dark sunglasses shade her eyes from the bright sunlight as iconic music plays loudly in the background? Yeah, Dylan’s life was nothing like that.

Once again, she was sitting in the police station waiting for her brother’s paperwork to be filed so she could use the rest of their small savings to bail him out. This would be the last time, she told herself, and this time she really meant it.

Glancing at her watch, she groaned when she realized only five minutes had passed since the last time she’d checked the time.

Leaning her head back against the wall, she closed her eyes and dreamed of a different life. One where she could have a small patch of land of her own, a horse, maybe two, a solid job that didn’t require her to wear short skirts and earn tips based on how big her tits looked that night. Maybe even a good man by her side, one that she wasn’t having to bail out at least once a month.

“McCaw,” someone shouted. Dylan bolted awake.

“Yes.” She rushed to the window.

“Your brother has been processed,” the clerk said from behind the thick glass. “How would you like to post his bail?”

“Can I write a check?” she asked, pulling out her savings checkbook. There went what little future she’d hoped for, she thought as she wrote a check for almost every dime she’d saved over the past several years.

Had it really been almost four years since their parents had died in the boating accident off the coast of Mexico? What would become their last family vacation had turned tragic on just the second day of their trip to Cancun.

It had been their parents’ twenty-second anniversary and a week later, her brother’s twenty-first birthday. Her dad had splurged on an all-inclusive deal for the whole family—snorkeling, sight-seeing, you name it. They had planned on doing it all together.

The first day had been wonderful, with the exception of Brent complaining that he had to spend his birthday with his family instead of his girlfriend-at-the-moment, Tilly.

But on day two, Brent was actually excited about snorkeling. They’d taken a boat to the snorkeling site, and the guides had set each of them up with the gear they needed. They had all jumped into the water eagerly.

They’d taken a break around lunchtime and enjoyed sandwiches with the other group of people who’d been booked on the same tour.

After lunch, her mother hadn’t been feeling well, and the group had agreed to return to shore early. Dylan and Brent had been sitting near the front of the boat, and Brent had been pestering her about a text message she’d received from Jax, her boyfriend at the time.

She remembered the sound of the engine starting and vaguely remembered hearing her father say that something didn’t sound right, just before a loud explosion threw both her and her brother more than fifty feet into the water.

She had hit the water hard and had inhaled more than a mouthful of salt water.

Brent had gripped her wrist and pulled her to the surface. Then he’d wrapped his arms around her and swum towards the destruction. The boat had still been engulfed in flames, and she’d screamed for her brother to stay away from it.

“Mom and Dad are in there,” he’d screamed at her.

Her mind had gone blank for the rest of her time in the water. It had almost been like watching a horror movie. She couldn’t do anything but watch the boat burn and sink. By the time she had regained herself, she and her brother were being hoisted into another boat. Blankets were wrapped around her shoulders. She remembered laughing at this. It was strange since it was so hot outside, and she’d actually still felt sticky from the heat.

But her teeth had been chattering and she couldn’t control the shaking. Her brother had wrapped his arms around her and cried as she stared blankly at the water where the boat had gone down.

She and Brent had been the lucky ones that day. Two more people had been pulled out of the water, but both had needed multiple surgeries. She’d heard that one of them had lost his leg in the explosion.

For the first year after their parents’ death, Brent had taken complete control of everything and she’d blindly allowed him to. Then a little over a year later, he’d been arrested at a bar.

She’d been a month away from graduation when she’d gotten the call eighteen years old. She’d had to drive down to the police station and learn all about posting bail. It had been humiliating. And it had kept her up all night so that by the time her brother walked out of the building, she was late for first period and had to go to school in the yoga pants and sweatshirt she’d been wearing the night before.

From that day on, Dylan had taken over the role of provider while her brother threw his life away.

She had found out that, over the course of that year, he’d blown almost every dime of their parents; money.

Within three months of Dylan’s graduation, they’d had to put the house up for sale. Before it could sell, the bank had repossessed it, taking any money they would have gained from the sale away from them.

They had sold all the family’s possessions in a hasty garage sale, and Dylan had hidden half of the money away from her brother in a checking account under her name only. She’d gotten a job waiting tables, then had gotten another job at a car wash.

By the time she’d turned twenty-one, she was working three full-time jobs while her brother bounced from small job to small job, occasionally being hauled into the jailhouse for public intoxication or bar fights.

A month before her birthday, she had found out that Brent had emptied her checking account. She’d made her car payment on time but her check had bounced.

She’d rushed to the bank found out that her account was overdrawn. When she’d confronted her brother, he’d yelled at her and told her that she didn’t understand the pressure he was under.

A week later, her car had been repossessed, and she’d been kicked out of her apartment when she couldn’t pay the rent.

She’d saved her money until she could afford a two-hundred-dollar piece of tin that would get her to and from her many jobs. Brent’s truck had been a graduation gift from their parents, and he still drove around in the shiny massive beast that was decked out like some spoiled country boy’s toy.

The next big chunk of her money had gone to move them into an apartment on the south side of Seattle, the part of town where you locked your car doors and tried to avoid eye contact with other drivers.

The one-bedroom place had only allowed her to sign a three-month lease, since her credit scores were so low, and she’d had to pay the three months in advance along with a security deposit.

Brent didn’t seem to mind sleeping on the old pull-out sofa or sharing the tiny bathroom with her. Actually, about the only thing her brother did mind was talking about money or about him getting a full-time job.

“McCaw.” Once again, her name was yelled out, and it echoed in the sterile waiting area.

She rushed over to the window. “Your brother is being released. You can head down to the east exit. He’ll be there.”

“Thank you.” She tucked her purse close to her side and walked down the long hallway. As she went, she planned out her speech. She was going to force Brent out of her place. She simply couldn’t afford to be his sister any longer. He was dragging her so far down, they were both drowning, and she needed to start thinking about her own future.

“Hey, sis.” Brent looked to be in good spirits as he walked out, and she wondered what sort of scheme he’d try to talk her into next. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Have I got an opportunity for us.”

“What?” she asked, feeling her entire body tense.

“I met some guys last night, and they’re heading over to Montana later this week. They say there’s high paying jobs up there for guys like me.”

She raised her eyebrows. “Guys like…” She let the rest hang.

“You know.” He flexed his muscle. There was only one aspect of her brother’s life that he truly cared about. Lifting weights. Their little living area was full of weights. She couldn’t even walk to the kitchen without stubbing her toe on a dumbbell.

“Okay.” She held her breath. This was the first time he’d shown any interest in getting a good job. If he didn’t change his mind, this could be a godsend.

“Don’t worry about a thing, I’ll make all the arrangements,” Brent said as he climbed into her small car.

She felt like groaning at the thought of her brother arranging anything on his own, but at least he was finally taking the initiative. Maybe this would be good for them both. He could head to Montana and make some money, and she could get on with her own life. She would hate not being close to him, but part of her was looking forward to being on her own for the first time in her life.

“They say there’s good work up there for you, as well.”

“Who is they?” she asked.

“Two guys I met last night at the bar.”

“The same two that you say jumped you?” she asked.

“Hu?” He glanced over at her, then chuckled. “Naw, two different guys.” He crossed his arms over his chest and seemed to take a nap as she drove them across town.

Glancing at her watch again, she groaned when she realized she wouldn’t have enough time to shower before heading into work.

“I’m going to drop you off here. I have to get to work.” She pulled to a stop in front of their building.

“Huh?” Her brother jolted awake. “Oh, sure, just leave everything to me.” He smiled. “See you tonight.”

“Right,” she said before driving away.

Ten hours later, after being on her feet for most of it, every part of her body hurt. She’d had to swallow a couple aspirins halfway through the day. Normally, she could make it through the workday on one soda, but today had been a three-soda kind of day. That told her it was past time for a day off.

As she was clocking out, Darian, the manager at Roco’s Diner, waved her towards the back.

“I won’t keep you long, but I thought it best to give you your final check.” He handed her an envelope.

“Final…” She felt her heart miss an entire beat.

“We’re sad to see you go, but I understand you and your brother have new jobs already lined up.”

“Me and…” She felt her knees go weak. “Who?” She shook her head.

Darian smiled. “You look exhausted. You’d better get some rest before the big move.”

“I…” She took a deep breath and blinked like someone had just throw water in her face.

Just then Darian’s phone rang. “I’ve got to take this.” He held out his hand for her to shake. “If you need anything…”

She left the building, unsure of just what had happened. She was halfway across the parking lot when she realized that her car wasn’t where she’d parked it. Turning a full circle, she frowned as she hunted her bag for her keys, as if they could magically make her car reappear.

She dug to the bottom of her purse and frowned. She sat down on the curb behind the diner and dumped the contents of her purse out. Her keys should have been there. She always put them in her purse, which was stored in the back office along with all the other waitresses’ things.

Just then, she heard a horn and jumped. Her brother drove up in his truck, a huge smile on his face. “Ready?” he called out to her through the open window.

“Brent, someone stole my car,” she said, approaching the truck.

“Stole?” Brent frowned. “You mean sold.” He smiled. “Get in. We’ve got lots of miles to go if we plan on making it.”

“Sold?” She felt her headache return full steam. It was then that she noticed the boxes in the back seat of the truck. “What’s all this?” She pointed to the back as he drove out of the parking lot.

“Our stuff. I think I got everything.” He shrugged.

“Everything of what?” She glared at him.

“Our stuff.” He chuckled as she climbed into his truck. She was almost on autopilot at this point. She’d gone almost two full days without sleep. Her entire body heated with anger as realization sunk in.

“You sold my car and packed up my stuff?” Her eyes narrowed. “Did you tell Darian I was quitting?”

Brent frowned over at her. “Well, sure, how else are we going to move to Montana? You can’t take the job with you and that old piece of shit car you drove would’ve never made it. Besides, we needed gas money.”

“You sold my car!” Her mind refused to focus.

“I told you I’d take care of everything.” He smiled over at her. “I have.”

“Brent, I don’t want to move to Montana!” She practically screamed it.

He was silent for a while. “I’ve already got a nice secretary job lined up for you.”

“I don’t care.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “You don’t get to make these kinds of decisions for me.”

“But you’d be making more than you do now working three jobs.”

Her eyes narrowed. “How do you know what I make?”

He smiled. “I took a guess. Besides, you’d have health benefits. You don’t get those working three part-time jobs.”

“Three full-time jobs,” she corrected. “And yes, I had

“Besides,” he interrupted. “I have a job working the oil fields. It’s just what I’ve always wanted to do. It pays more than double what you’d be making.”

She opened her mouth, then shut it and slowly let the breath out of her lungs. “How much?”

“Five figures a year.”

“Minimum wage is five figures a year.” She rolled her eyes. “How much?”

“Eighty-thousand,” he said, but it sounded like he was just throwing a number out.

“You already have the job?” she asked slowly.

“Yes.” He smiled.

She glanced back at all the boxes. “You packed up our stuff, sold my car, quit my job

“Jobs,” he corrected with a smile.

“You did all this in one day?” she asked, feeling a little light-headed.

“It wasn’t hard.” He shrugged.

Her brother had never shown this much interest in anything in his life. The only thing he’d ever worked hard at was his physique.

“I’m too tired to think.” She rolled her shoulders.

“Then don’t. I’ll take the first shift driving.”

“We’re leaving now?” She sat up a little straighter.

Brent chuckled. “Well, yeah.” He nodded to all the boxes shoved in the back seat. She glanced behind and saw more boxes in the bed of the truck. “Work starts bright and early Monday morning.”

Feeling a little hijacked, she wanted to argue, but her mind was far too tired to try and come up with a good debate. If he was telling the truth and they both had jobs waiting for them, then why fight it?

Montana or Seattle, the fact was, she didn’t care either way. And she didn’t have the energy to argue.

She rested her head against the glass. Her brother had dragged her around for the past few years, so what was once more? She drifted off to sleep as she thought about a new future in Montana. The possibility of working one job instead of three lifted so much weight off her shoulders that, for the first time in years, she slept like a baby.

* * *

Thurston McGowan the third, Trey to his family and friends and pretty much everyone else in the world, was drunk. And why not? He was celebrating the birth of his first nephew, Timothy Jack McGowan. A good name for a beautiful baby.

He’d spend the morning at the hospital with his brother Tyler and his wife, Kristen, along with the rest of his family. After everyone had been kicked out so that the new family could have some quiet time, he and his other brother, Trent, had hit the local bars along with several of their buddies.

One bar had turned into two, which had snowballed into hitting every single bar in the small town of Haven, Montana, before closing time, which was less than three hours away. They still had the biggest hole-in-the-wall bar, Carrie Ann’s, to go.

The place was full of the lowest of the low. Trey and his brothers hardly ever stepped foot in the place, unless they were looking for a fight. But tonight, Trey could honestly say he wasn’t. He doubted anything could get him off the high he was in.

He’d lived in Haven all of his life, except when he’d taken off to Miami for a year shortly after graduation. He’d rushed home after his father passed away suddenly.

If he had to be honest with himself, he’d hated Miami. It had been too hot and full of too many people. He’d felt like he would suffocate if he’d stayed any longer.

Losing his dad had been tragic, but the family had bounced back after learning to lean on and rely on one another. It had taken some time for the three brothers to get the hang of running the family business, but in the end, McGowan Enterprises had flourished.

“I’m buying this round,” one of the guys called out as they walked into Carrie Ann’s. Trey wobbled his way across the sticky dance floor and made his way down the short hallway towards the bathroom. He was thankful Mason, one of his buddies, had been picked as designated driver that night. Usually, they drew straws, but tonight Mason had volunteered since he was trying to cut down on the calories and drop some weight for his girlfriend.

Swinging the door wide open, he almost toppled over a muscular guy standing just inside the door. The man looked familiar, but that wasn’t surprising; Trey knew everyone in Haven.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. He moved past the guy, heading for a urinal.

“Jackass,” the man said to his back.

Trey smiled. “Sure, buddy.” He finished doing his business and turned around to face the guy, who was still glaring in his direction.

“You’ve got a problem,” the man said, taking a step closer to him.

Trey took in the guy’s size and quickly shook his head. “Don’t think so.” He smiled. “Just had to piss.” The man easily outweighed him by at least thirty pounds, and Trey bet most of it was muscle.

Moving slowly, Trey walked over to the sink. His mother had taught him right, so he proceeded to wash his hands thoroughly.

The man continued to hover just inside the doorway. Trey turned towards him and the door, but the guy moved slightly and blocked it. The man still looked familiar, but since Trey was too far into the festivities of the evening to place where he’d seen the guy before.

“Do I know you?” Trey asked, trying to get his eyes to focus.

“You won’t forget my fist…” The man lifted his arm at the same time the bathroom door swung open, causing him to fall off balance. Trey took that moment to make a quick escape. He chuckled about the entire ordeal as he crossed the room to find his buddies.

He was halfway across the dance floor when he bumped into someone else. This someone, however, was a lot softer and a hell of a lot prettier than the man lurking in the bathroom.

“Scuse me,” he said, reaching out to steady the woman. His hands gripped her shoulders, to make sure she wouldn’t fall over. Upon seeing the sexy raven-haired beauty, his fingers tightened slightly. “Well, hello there.” His smile turned from apologetic to one of his well-practiced flirty smiles.

Her dark eyes narrowed slightly. “Excuse me, I have to find someone.” Her eyes traveled past his shoulders and he watched heat and anger take over.

She pushed past him, and he turned to watch her walk away. The fact that she was wearing tight black leather shorts in the dead of winter in Montana made him smile. Then his foggy brain registered the long sexy legs that she used to make her way across the dance floor. He watched her hips sway and was almost hypnotized by the motion.

He must have stood there in the middle of the dance floor grinning like a fool in her direction for several seconds before he finally registered what was going on. The raven-haired beauty was arguing with angry bathroom man. His feet were rooted to the spot on the dance floor as he watched the couple arguing. The woman moved her hands and arms around as if she was trying to make a point. The man, for his part, looked at her with the same look he’d given Trey moments ago in the bathroom.

Trey was just about to turn around and go find his buddies when bathroom man reached out and pushed the woman. Trey was across the floor in a flash, his fists swinging, before he remembered that the guy outweighed him. His first blow caught the man off guard, thankfully, sending him flailing back towards the wall. He didn’t think he’d try for another swing, but the man came at him, knocking the pair of them to the dance floor.

Trey face was pushed up against the sticky floor. He bucked and kicked until the man’s grip on him finally loosened. He swung his elbow out, catching the man under the chin. The next blow went to angry bathroom man, who clocked Trey in the left eye, sending his head backwards and knocking it into the hard dance floor.

The guy had just set up residence above him, and Trey had braced for the repetitive blows that he knew were coming, when the man was yanked from him.

Ethan and Mason held the man back as Trey pulled himself off the floor. His two friends were equal matches for the other man. Both men worked for him, Mason as a motorhand and Ethan as a derrick worker. Both jobs required strong muscles.

“Are you okay?” Trey turned to the pretty raven-haired beauty, just as several other people stepped into the mix.

Trey groaned when he saw Tom and Dale rush over to them. He wiped the blood from his lip and held his hands out.

“Everything’s okay,” he tried.

“Trey McGowan.” Tom shook his head. “You know better than this.”

Trey smiled but turned when the raven-haired beauty gasped. Her eyes got bigger as she looked him up and down. He felt a little nervous as she assessed him. What did she see? He thought about it and groaned inwardly. He was probably a mess at this point. His T-shirt was hanging half off his shoulders since the man had ripped it in the fall. He knew he had blood dripping down his lip and would probably have a fat lip and a black eye soon. He was drunk, disorderly, and for some reason, for the first time in his life, he felt ashamed for it.

“We’ll have to haul you both in,” Dale said, taking the other man from Ethan and Mason. The man jerked his arm, causing both Ethan and Mason to grip him tighter.

“Just try it, buddy,” Mason added.

“Trey didn’t do…” Ethan started, earning him a stern look from Tom. His friend wasn’t dumb and shut his mouth quickly.

“We’ll take them both in,” Tom repeated. He turned to the other man and narrowed his eyes. “We aren’t going to have a problem, are we?”

The other man grunted and rolled his eyes.

“No, he won’t cause any more problems.” Everyone turned towards the beauty as she stepped forward. Trey’s eyes moved down to her legs one last time.

Hell, he didn’t know how long he’d be in the drunk tank and the memory of those legs would help him through the next few hours.

The woman turned to the other man and glared at him. “Go.”

Trey was ushered outside, while the other man was cuffed. Dale opened the back door and Trey slid into the back seat and rested his head against the leather. His head was spinning slightly, and he could feel his lip and eye start stinging.

The other man was put in the seat beside him, his hands cuffed behind his back. When the doors were shut, he glanced at the bar as they drove away. The raven-haired beauty was standing outside in the fresh snow, her arms wrapped around herself, biting her bottom lip with worry as she watched them drive away.

“Lucky,” Trey said under his breath.

“What?” the man sitting next to him asked. Trey gave him his full attention and turned towards him.

“I said you’re lucky to have someone like that. You don’t deserve her,” he said clearly.

The man frowned at him. “She’s a pain in the ass,” he grunted in response, and Trey thought about punching the man again.

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