Chapter Thirty
Sophie didn’t know how long she cried but finally her sobs tapered off to sniffles, and she lay quietly on the bed on her side. She was so worn out and emotionally exhausted that she didn’t even scream when the moss green tharp began moving toward her. It’s probably coming to suffocate me, she thought dully as she watched it inch across the sleeping platform. Not that I care at the moment. At least then I’d be off this horrible planet.
But the tharp didn’t try to wind itself around her neck or cover her face. Instead it slowly draped itself around her shoulders like a shawl. It wasn’t until she began to feel warm that Sophie realized she’d been shivering.
“All right,” she said aloud, stroking an edge of the furry creature. “I know you’re just being nice because I’m your only source of food but okay, you can stay.”
The tharp seemed to snuggle closer in response to her words and Sophie found that she was actually comforted. Now that she thought about it, having a living blanket that could cuddle with you and keep you warm, even in the coldest weather, was kind of nice. She just wished she’d known about it before she’d agreed to wear it as clothing.
“Why didn’t anyone tell me about you?” she said as the tharp nuzzled her cheek. “If I had known what to expect I wouldn’t have been so freaked out.” She vaguely remembered Liv complaining about a live blanket that Baird had gotten from somewhere, but she had never made the connection between that and the tharps of Tranq Prime. Now, of course, she realized the live blanket and the tharp must be one and the same.
“You were very naughty tonight,” she told the tharp sternly. “You caused me a lot of trouble. I’ll keep you around but I’m never wearing you again—I just
want to make that clear.”
The tharp nuzzled her again and Sophie could’ve sworn that she heard a very faint sound that was somewhere between a hum and a rustle. It reminded her of the rusty sounding purr her cat, Miss Meow used to make when someone stroked her. “Maybe I should name you,” she said, stroking it again. “You remind me of my old cat, Miss Meow. How about if I call you Miss Meow Two? I know it’s not very original but you could go by MM2 for short. That sounds kind of science fiction-y and God knows that’s what everybody on Earth is going to think you are—if I ever get back there, I mean.” She sighed.
“Hey, who are you talking to?”
Sophie looked up to see Nadiah standing in the doorway. “Oh, hi.”
“I hope you don’t mind.” Nadiah bit her lip and shifted from foot to foot uncertainly. “I’ll go if you want me to. I wouldn’t blame you if you were really mad at me but Sylvan asked me to check on you.”
“Really?” Sophie sat up and swiped under her eyes. “Uh, where is he?”
“Back at the feast. Well, it’s almost over now. Pretty soon everyone will be going to the Snowdrop Dance.”
Sophie groaned and put a hand over her eyes. “Great. Just great. And I’m sure he’ll dance the night away with his ex—who probably won’t be his ex by the time the dance is over.”
Nadiah shrugged and came to sit on the sleeping platform beside her. “Well, it is kind of obvious that Feenah has decided she wants him back. I even heard her call him Tanar before I left.”
Sophie frowned. “I heard her call him that too. What does that mean? Is it just an endearment like ‘honey’ or ‘darling?’”
Nadiah snorted. “Hardly. It means ‘heart’s desire’. It’s what you call your male when you’re either mated or about to be mated.”
Sophie groaned again. “Ugh! She was being so superior and treating me like I was his pet or something! And then to call him that right in front of me…” She shook her head and then had another thought. “Nadiah, what does Talana mean?”
Nadiah’s eyes went wide. “Goddess, you heard him calling her that?”
“No. That’s what he calls me. He told me it was just a nickname like ‘baby’ or ‘sweetheart.’ Is it?”
Nadiah gave a long, low whistle. “No, not at all. Tell me, how many times has he called you that?”
“A lot,” Sophie admitted. “He started before we ever came here. Why, what does it mean?”
“Blood of my blood. It’s what Blood Kindred call their bonded brides. If he’s calling you that, Sophia, I don’t think you have to worry about Feenah.”
“Yes, I do,” Sophie protested. “Because she’s determined to have him back. And he’s foresworn himself of me. And…and…it’s all my fault.” She felt tears in her eyes again and blinked them away. “God, I feel so stupid. Even if he still wanted me I couldn’t have him.”
“Why not?” Nadiah stroked the moss green tharp absently, like one might stroke a cat.
Sophie sighed. “A lot of reasons. All of them seemed valid and important to begin with but now…now I’m beginning to wonder.”
“What reasons?” Nadiah asked.
Sophie sighed. “Well, at first I was afraid because I didn’t really know him and he’s such a big guy, uh, male. I…I was attacked by someone almost his size a long time ago and it never really left me.”
“Oh no.” Nadiah put a hand on her shoulder. “That’s terrible.”
“It was.” Sophie nodded. “I had a really hard time with it. But then I got to know Sylvan and I realized that he would never do that, never hurt me the way that other guy did.”
“Of course not!” Nadiah declared. “Sylvan is an honorable male. He would never attack a helpless female.”
“I know,” Sophie said. “And then he went after the guy who attacked me.”
“Well of course he did.” Nadiah put a hand on her hip. “That’s what Kindred do. They avenge any wrongs visited upon their females. Let me tell you, if any male around here had attacked a female or even spoken harshly to her and then she got bonded to a Kindred…” She shook her head. “He’d better move to a new grotto quick. Preferably one on the other side of the planet. Or he’s vranna meat—know what I mean?”
Sophie nodded. “I understand that now. But seeing the guy that attacked me brought everything back. It forced me to face what had happened in a way I never had before. And that made me upset— really upset. Because I didn’t want to face it. I just wanted to bury my head in the sand and forget it.”
“Are you still upset about it?” Nadiah asked quietly.
Sophie shook her head. “No. I realize now I should have dealt with it when it happened. Instead I tried not to think about it—it hurt less that way.”
“So if you’re not afraid of him and you’re not upset with him, then why aren’t you with him?” Nadiah asked. “Why aren’t you out dancing with Sylvan right now and showing Feenah that he’s taken?”
Sophie bit her lip. “Because I am still afraid of him. Well, part of him.”
Nadiah leaned forward and lowered her voice. “Is it his shaft? Is that what you’re afraid of? I mean, I’ve heard that the Kindred are really well endowed, so I can understand you being scared.”
Sophie felt her cheeks getting hot. “No, it’s not that. Although it is, uh, pretty impressive. It’s his fangs.”
“His fangs?” Nadiah sat back frowning. “Why are you scared of those?”
“Because he wants to bite me, of course. And I have a phobia of anything sharp that goes into a vein.” Sophie thought of her childhood blood transfusions and shivered. “I just…just don’t think I could let him. That horrible piercing pain…”
“But it doesn’t hurt!” Nadiah grabbed her hands. “It doesn’t, honestly —or only for a minute anyway and then it’s pure pleasure.”
Sophie frowned. “How would you know? Have you been bitten by a Blood Kindred?” She was pretty sure Zeelah would not approve of that.
“I wish. ” Nadiah rolled her eyes. “But no, of course not. I know because it’s in all the novels. The heroine offers the hero—the Blood Kindred I mean—the gift of her blood. She bares her neck to him and he bites her. She feels just the tiniest little pinch of pain but then he immediately begins to inject her with his essence. After that it’s all pleasure.”
Sophie shook her head. “That sounds really nice but you can’t believe everything you read in books. Especially when it comes to, uh, sex.”
“In this case you can. I know someone who’s been bitten,” Nadiah said triumphantly. “Or I know her sister, anyway. And she said that her sister said the minute you feel the essence it’s absolutely incredible. In fact…” She dropped her voice and leaned in again. “She said the Blood Kindred’s essence is like an orgasm in liquid form. It’s that good .”
“Really?” Sophie didn’t know what to believe. It would be nice if she could count on the bite hurting only for an instant before turning into pure pleasure. But could she trust a second hand account from a teenaged girl, who had obviously read one too many romance novels?
“Really,” Nadiah said firmly. “So were there any other reasons you thought you couldn’t be with Sylvan?”
Sophie shook her head. “No, that was it. But look, Nadiah, even if Sylvan still wanted me and didn’t care about Feenah, I don’t think he’d be willing to…to bond me to him. He doesn’t want to hurt me or cause me fear or pain and he thinks biting me would cause me both.”
“And would they?”
“I…I’m not sure anymore,” Sophie admitted. “But I just got finished telling him I hated him for not telling me about the tharp. And I pretty much told him I hated his entire planet too. Sorry…” She gave Nadiah a sidelong glance. “I didn’t mean it. I was just overwhelmed.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Nadiah said cheerfully. “I hate it here too. In fact, the minute I’m of age, I’m leaving. I’m going to get called by a Kindred warrior and fold space out of here so fast my parents won’t know what hit them.”
“You shouldn’t get married, er, bonded, just to get away,” Sophie said. “Can’t you, I don’t know…go away to college or something? Like a school that’s far from your home town…er, grotto?”
“Maybe.” Nadiah didn’t look too concerned. “Anyway, back to your problem. You think Sylvan wouldn’t bite you even if you asked him to?”
“I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t,” Sophie admitted. “He swore an oath to leave me alone.”
Nadiah made a shooing gesture. “Oh, all that foreswearing stuff is so stupid. He only said that because he thinks it will cause you pain. If you can convince him you’re not afraid of a little pain and you want him to bite you—”
“I do want him to,” Sophie said, lifting her chin. “I don’t care about the pain any more—I want him.”
“Well you’d better let him know in a hurry if you don’t want him biting Feenah instead.” Nadiah made a face. “Ugh, I can’t stand her. I’ll just die if I have to have her as a relative.”
Sophie smiled. “We can’t have that. Tell me how to make him bite me and help me get dressed for the dance. But I want to wear something that’s not alive this time. Okay?”
Nadiah clapped her hands. “Oh good! So you’re going after him?”
Sophie nodded. “If he still wants me after all the awful things I said to him.”
“If he’s calling you Talana then he still wants you.” Nadiah was already playing with her hair, trying new styles in the 3-D viewer. “Trust me on that, Sophia.”
Sophie hoped that she was right. Talking about Sylvan and her problems with him had made things clear in a way they hadn’t been before. And what was clearer than anything else, was that she wanted him—really wanted him—fangs and all. I’m not going to hand him to Feenah on a silver platter just because I’m afraid of a few little bites, she told herself firmly. I just hope it’s not too late…
The dance was being held in the main grotto down among the silvery-white trees Sophie had seen the first time she’d passed through it. She wondered if they were the Snowdrop trees Sylvan had talked about and decided they must be. Their leaves were thin and spidery and delicate—almost like palm sized snowflakes—on the ends of the pale, glimmering branches. The snowflake leaves were pure white with just a tracery of pale blue along their edges, making them look ethereal and lovely and setting the scene for a magical dance.
But the scenery wasn’t on Sophie’s mind as she stepped under the farthest tree and studied the dancers. She scanned the crowd of couples dancing and winced when she saw Magistrate Licklow dancing with a tall, thin woman who was probably his wife. She wished desperately that she hadn’t made a fool of herself quite so recently in front of all these people. But that’s in the past now, she told herself, lifting her chin. And anyway, once we leave here I’ll never have to see them again. So who cares what they think?
Still, she had always been shy and it took an enormous effort not to just turn tail and run away before everyone at the dance noticed the “crazy” off-worlder and started talking. She might have lost her nerve completely if it hadn’t been for Nadiah standing behind her.
“Go on,” she hissed, poking Sophie in the back. “You look fabulous . Get out there.”
Sophie hoped she was right. She was wearing one of Nadiah’s few non-living outfits and it was a little too tight for her taste. Still, she had to admit that it looked nice and draped well. It was a long red leather dress which came down to her ankles. Nadiah had told her was made from tanned, dyed vranna hide. The dress had a deep V neck which was trimmed in short, black fur and high, off the shoulder sleeves. A deep split up one thigh was also trimmed in fur and showed a lot of leg—or would have if she hadn’t been wearing a pair of high black boots with a wedge-type heel.
The leather dress and boots made Sophie feel like she was dressed for a Wild West fashion show, but at least she didn’t have to worry about her outfit tickling or itching her…or deserting her at an inopportune moment. So it was with a fair amount of confidence that she stepped out from under her tree and walked toward Sylvan.
He was dancing with Feenah but it was impossible to tell if he was happy about it or not. His face was completely impassive as he performed the elaborate steps to the slow, steady beat of the stately music. It was kind of like a waltz with a very slow techno beat in the background—bizarre but somehow catchy.
What if he wants her now instead of me? What if he hates me for saying all those awful things about his planet? Sophie squeezed her hands into fists nervously. She could feel her heart beating in every part of her body at once and, even more strangely, it felt as though the blood in her veins was running hot. Which was completely ridiculous, of course—her blood was the same temperature as the rest of her body. What she was feeling was no doubt a bad case of the nerves and that was all. But it was never going to get better if she didn’t do something about it.
Sophie took a deep breath. Here goes.
Walking up to Feenah—who had eyes only for Sylvan—she reached up and tapped the taller woman on the shoulder.
“What?” Feenah looked around in obvious irritation and her eyes widened when they finally settled on Sophie. “Oh look, Sylvan, your little pet is here.”
“Sophia?” They stopped dancing and Sylvan gave her a worried look.
“Hi.” Sophie smiled at him. “I’m, uh, feeling better.”
He smiled back. “I’m glad to hear it.”
Feenah’s eyes flashed but her voice was as sweet as ever. “Whatever can the poor little thing want? I thought you’d put her to bed for the night?”
Sophie raised an eyebrow. “What I want is for you to stop talking about me like I’m some lower life form. I’m not Sylvan’s pet, I’m…well, anyway, I care for him. Deeply.”
“How sweet. Of course you do.” Feenah gave her a patronizing smile. “And you can tell him all about it once the dance is over. But right now we’re a little busy, so if you’d excuse us—” She put her hands on Sylvan’s shoulders again but Sophie was determined—she wasn’t about to be pushed aside.
“I don’t think so.” She stepped closer so that she was almost between Feenah and Sylvan. “I’m cutting in.”
Feenah gave her a look of wide-eyed surprise. “You can’t mean you want to dance with my Sylvan? I’m afraid you’ll embarrass yourself, sweetie—and haven’t you had enough of that already tonight?” She gave Sophie a sweetly sympathetic look that was obviously fake.
“He is not your Sylvan,” Sophie said with as much dignity as she could muster. “And yes, I want to dance with him.”
Feenah clearly wasn’t going anywhere. “Why don’t you watch and see what you can learn for the next dance? After all, you don’t even know the steps.”
“Then I’ll teach her.” Stepping away from Feenah’s grip on his shoulders, Sylvan offered Sophie his hand. “Would you care to dance?”
“Yes.” She smiled at him gratefully. “Yes, I really would.”
Feenah’s smile was slipping but she still tried to keep her voice light. “It’s all well and good for you to want to teach her about our customs, Sylvan, but you know it’s against tradition to change partners in the middle of a dance.”
Sylvan shrugged. “I guess I’ll be breaking tradition then.” He nodded at Feenah. “It’s been nice seeing you again after all this time, Feenah but I have to see to Sophia. She is my first and most important priority.”
“Is that so?” Feenah’s smile was entirely gone now, replaced by a spiteful look that reminded Sophie very much of Lady Whitethorn, her mother. “Well then, I hope you enjoy your dance,” she said, glaring at Sophie but speaking to Sylvan. “That is, unless your little pet has another fit and starts going crazy again.”
Sylvan frowned at her, his ice blue eyes narrowing. “Be careful of what you say, Feenah. Sophia is the female I love. If you were a male I would have to challenge you for talking about her in that manner.”
Sophie’s heart gave a thump and it was all she could do not to stick out her tongue at the other woman. It was a childish impulse, of course, but then, Feenah had been treating her like a child or a pet from the minute she’d met her. Would it really be so bad to at least say Nyah, nyah, nyah, he’s mine, not yours? Probably so, she decided reluctantly. But she couldn’t resist giving the fuming Feenah a little smirk as Sylvan took her in his arms and led her into the dance.
Me, he picked me! her heart sang as he held her close. It was true that she had no idea of the steps but Sylvan was a surprisingly graceful dancer for such a large male and he seemed to have a way of putting her exactly where she needed to be at any given time. Sophie relaxed in his arms, letting him lead, and everything was perfect.
“That was wonderful,” she said as he held her close. The music was slow enough that she could talk to him comfortably as they danced. “Thank you for being so sweet, even after all the terrible things I said.”
Sylvan smiled down at her. “You were upset and I was the cause of it. What did you say that I didn’t deserve?”
“Still, I shouldn’t have decided that I hated your whole planet on the basis of a few bad experiences. After all, I’m sure Earth seemed weird to you the first time you visited it as well.”
“It was… different ,” Sylvan admitted. “I came mostly to try and keep Baird in line. He was about to claim Olivia and he was very much on the edge. I didn’t understand that kind of emotion then.”
“And now you do?” Sophie asked softly.
He nodded. “Now I do. I didn’t think I could be affected the way other males are by the urge to claim a bride. But you proved me wrong.”
Sophie bit her lip. “I’m sorry.”
Sylvan smiled again. “I’m not. I’m indebted to you for showing me how much I could feel. When I think that I almost mated Feenah…” He shook his head.
“She’s very beautiful,” Sophie said generously.
“As well as vapid, shallow, and spiteful.” Sylvan shook his head. “I would have been frozen all my life. She didn’t have the necessary emotion to thaw my heart. Only you do, Sophia.”
“Sylvan,” she murmured, looking up at him. “I—” Suddenly the world spun in a dizzy arc around her head and she felt herself falling.
* * * * *
“Are you all right?” Sylvan scooped her up and carried her quickly away from the dancing couples.
Sophia had her eyes tightly shut and she clung to him as if she was drowning. Seriously concerned, Sylvan took her to the edge of the snowdrop grove and settled under one of the trees with her on his lap. “Sophia?” he murmured, stroking her cheek.
She opened her eyes and rubbed her forehead. “I’m okay,” she said, trying to sit up. “It was just the dancing—it made me dizzy.”
“We weren’t spinning or doing any sudden moves,” Sylvan pointed out, still looking at her anxiously. “Were you feeling faint earlier? Is there anything else wrong?”
“Poor Sylvan.” She laughed. “Between the tharp and everything else I’ve nearly given you a heart attack several times tonight. But I feel fine, honestly.” She frowned. “Well, except for…”
“Except for what?” he demanded.
“It’s nothing.” She waved dismissively and started to get to her feet. “Come on, let’s dance some more. I was really enjoying myself for the first time since you brought me here.”
“Sophia, please…” Sylvan reached for her hand and tugged her back down. “No matter how small your symptoms, I want to know about them. Tell me, please.”
“It’s nothing,” she said, sinking back down on the bluish-green moss. “Probably just my nerves but well, I feel like…my blood feels hot . Like it’s warmer than the rest of my body.” She laughed nervously. “Isn’t that silly?”
Sylvan felt his heart drop. It couldn’t be! And yet …“How long have you been feeling like this?” he said urgently. “Try and remember, Sophia, it may be vitally important.”
“Only since just before I came up to you and Feenah. I thought it was because I was nervous about, you know, confronting her and cutting in.”
Sylvan shook his head. “I don’t think so. Have you had any chills?”
“No. I—wait. I was shivering after you left me back in the, uh, domicile. But then MM2 draped itself over my shoulders and I warmed right up.”
He raised an eyebrow. “MM2?”
“My tharp. ” Sophie shrugged, looking embarrassed. “I know it sounds strange but I figured if I have to keep it, I might as well give it a name. And you know, I think it’s sorry for what it did. I don’t think it’s bad so much as just mischievous .”
Sylvan almost smiled. Leave it to Sophia to make a pet out of what was supposed to be a strictly functional domesticated animal. “All right, leaving the subject of how odd it is to name a tharp, let’s get back to your symptoms. So you had chills and then you started to feel like your blood was running hot in your veins?”
“That’s it exactly—that’s the feeling,” Sophie exclaimed. “Why, is it some kind of a Tranq Prime thing?”
Sylvan shook his head grimly. I hope not. Oh gods, how I hope not! Aloud he asked, “What did you eat at the feast?”
“Only a bite of that nasty beetle pudding.” She shivered. “I’m sorry, Sylvan, but that is one part of your culture I am never going to like. It’s just terrible.”
“It’s an acquired taste,” he said absently. “So you had some of the fleeta pudding. But there was no water in the glasses, only woo. So I don’t see how it’s possible…”
“I had some water though,” Sophia said.
“You did?” He looked at her sharply. “When?”
“When I was getting ready, before the feast. Nadia gave it to me in that huge, heavy hospitality cup.”
Sylvan groaned. “Gods! That’s right—I did hear her tell my mother’s sister that she’d let you drink from the cup.” He shook his head. “But still, it can’t be. You’re not a native of Tranq Prime. I don’t see how…”
“How what?” Sophia looked bewildered.
“Sophia, just tell me one more thing.” He lowered his voice and looked at her intently. “Are you feeling any sensitivity or irritation right now in your nipples or between your legs?”
“Oh, I…” Her cheeks went pink and she nodded. “Now that you mention it, I have been feeling, uh more sensitive, just since we’ve been sitting under this tree talking. But I thought it was just because this dress is so tight.”
“I’m afraid not,” Sylvan said grimly. “Sophia…” He took both her hands in his. “Do you remember me telling you about Blood Fever?”
“The disease that only affects unmated females and…oh!” She looked up at him in obvious dismay. “You don’t think I have that do you?”
Sylvan nodded. “I’m afraid so. The only way to be absolutely certain is to observe the coloration of your nipples and the inside of your sex. If you really do have Blood Fever, they’ll both turn deep red very shortly.”
“Really?” She put a hand to her breasts protectively. “Is there a cure? I know you said something about a vaccine…”
“The vaccine prevents you from getting the fever in the first place—it can’t cure it once you’ve contracted it.” Sylvan shook his head. “In the past, the only way to be cured was to let one of the Blood Kindred who’d had some of your blood bite you.”
She paled visibly and Sylvan knew why—she still feared him—feared his bite. Of course, knowing the trauma she’d endured in her childhood, he didn’t blame her. And now that he knew she cared for him—really cared—he felt he could go the rest of his life without biting her. They would have to have a purely platonic love, since Sylvan couldn’t make love to her and bond her to him without biting her, but that was all right with him. If a passionate celibacy was all he could have with Sophia, well, that was still better than having sex with any other female as far as he was concerned.
“It’s all right,” he assured her, putting a hand to her pale cheek. “I’m sure I can use the vaccine as a basis and formulate a cure for you out of my essence. I’ve had your blood on several occasions, so my body will carry the antidote for you.”
“No, Sylvan.” Sophia looked him in the eye as she spoke. “No, I…I want you to bite me. Bite me and heal me that way.”
Sylvan shook his head. “You don’t know what you’re asking, Sophia. It’s not just about biting.”
“What else is it about?” she asked.
He frowned. “The antidote isn’t only carried in my essence—it’s in all my other bodily fluids as well. And in order to be certain you’re cured, I’ll need to fill you with as much, er, fluid as possible.”
“Oh.” Her cheeks went scarlet.
“So now you see,” Sylvan said gently. “Don’t worry—I have a small but fully functional lab on board the shuttle. I’ll start work on the antidote at once. But first I want to get you back to my mother’s sister’s dwelling.” He stood up and pulled her gently to her feet. “Just tell me one thing, are you having any other symptoms?”
“Nothing except…ow!” Bending down, she lifted her skirt slightly and scratched her knee. “Nothing except a really itchy knee.”
Sylvan frowned. “You were saying something about that when we folded space, weren’t you?”
She nodded. “So I guess that can’t be part of the, uh, Blood Fever. It’s just the scar from where the urlich bit me.”
“But I healed you,” Sylvan protested.
“I know—and you did a great job.” Sophia rubbed her knee again. “But there’s still this little lump of scar tissue. Just here, see?” She lifted her skirt again and showed him.
Sylvan leaned over and looked more closely. “There does seem to be some kind of a lump there. But I don’t understand—there shouldn’t have been any scaring at all.”
“It’s okay. It’s just itchy.” She dropped her skirt and gave him a small, uncertain smile. “Shouldn’t we be getting back to the domicile? I—”
Suddenly there was a blinding flash like lightning and a loud pop! Sylvan’s nose was filled with the scent of ozone and he was temporarily blinded by the explosion of light. What in the seven hells…?
“Sophia?” he said, blinking as he reached for her. “I don’t know what just happened but…Sophia?” For his hands touched only empty air.
“Sophia? Sophia!” Looking around frantically, Sylvan saw an empty red leather dress and black boots lying on the ground exactly where she had been standing.
But Sophia was gone.