Chapter 3

THE afternoon sun was slanting through the threadbare curtains when Evan collapsed into the chair, dazed by the events of the day. Les had insisted that since he hadn’t come from his own hand, it qualified as a handjob and therefore paid an extra hundred. Evan certainly wasn’t going to argue.

He reached over and pulled the folder with all his Sonic paperwork from his backpack. Reading over the contract, he was a bit confused by some of the sexual acts that were listed. There were some things on there he had never heard of before. Sure, he was a virgin, but he wasn’t naïve. He would have to Google some of the terms.

The thought of doing much more than he’d done today scared him a little. To be honest, though, if someone had asked him two days ago if he would let another guy bring him off on camera, he would have answered with an adamant no. It was different with Noah, though. In the heat of the moment, it had seemed okay. It felt right. And even now he was having a hard time digging up any feeling of regret. He had never come so hard in his life, barely conscious as he came back down from his orgasm.

He had no idea it could be like that. Now that he knew, he was a little more than curious to see what else he had been missing. With the memory of his new experiences, he was hard again in no time. He brought to mind the faceless body he usually thought of while he touched himself. This time, the only person he could see was Noah. He remembered the way Noah had felt behind him, his erection pressing into his ass. Rather than being a distraction, it had made him hotter, more desperate to come.

It had taken everything in him not to reach around to feel Noah’s cock, skin on skin. His preoccupation with Noah had to be because his only real sexual experience had been with him.

He resolved himself to this explanation and allowed his mind to conjure images of Noah. He reached under the covers and took himself in hand, remembering the way Noah looked at him right before he hauled him into his lap. His handsome face showed hunger and need, which was the biggest turn on of all.

Evan had never had someone look at him like that before. He had thought Noah was handsome on the website, while in person he was breathtakingly gorgeous. Tall and built, he looked like the all-American boy next door. Effortlessly messy blond hair, tanned skin, and blue eyes made him seem real and approachable.

Evan fisted his erection, once, twice before he came in staccato bursts. His head lolled back against his chair as he struggled to calm his pounding heart. He’d had two explosive orgasms in as many hours. If this was only his introduction to being in porn, he couldn’t wait to see what it would be like to be fully entrenched in the job.

Of course it was temporary. He would get in, get off, get out, and get away with enough money to make it through the first few semesters of college. If this went well, he might be able to do some filming during summers—enough to get him through the year—then once he graduated, he would be able to make a new life for himself.

He felt lighter. The worries that usually weighted him down and dragged him under seemed less heavy tonight. He had been through enough shit during the first eighteen years; he figured he deserved something good to happen to him. It was tough to be optimistic after years of being beaten down and told you were worthless, but if Evan could get away from Fairfax, make something of himself, maybe he could be happy for the first time in his life.

It had been so long since he had had a reprieve from such worries. He was looking forward to the trip for that reason alone.

Well, maybe not only that reason.

Remembering the card Les had given him before he left to catch his bus back to the motel, Evan pulled it out of his pocket and typed the website address into his browser.

Noah’s crooked smile greeted him on the main page. He clicked on the login section and typed in his username and password. The next page loaded, showing different categories of videos and different sections for all the boys. He clicked on Noah’s first. Hundreds of thumbnails loaded onto the screen. The temperature in the room seemed to increase twenty degrees. Evan couldn’t help the wide grin that spread across his face at the familiar figure on the screen.

Evan clicked on the first video and popped his headphones into his ears. Noah’s face smiled back at him again. That little teasing smile was starting to become familiar to Evan.

Soon, the smile was replaced with the image of Noah kissing another man. Noah’s left hand threaded through the man’s hair, while the other was on his ass, pulling him close and grinding their hips together. He kept watching as Noah stripped the smaller man down, piece by piece, licking and kissing as he went. Evan’s belly felt hot, unsettled. He wanted something, but he couldn’t pinpoint the focus of his desire. The man had fallen to his knees and pulled at Noah’s belt, then freed him from his boxers.

Evan had only felt what Noah was hiding in his pants; he hadn’t seen it. His first glimpse left him feeling a bit lightheaded and dizzy. He couldn’t tear his eyes away, though. The man licked at Noah’s cock before taking it all into his mouth. Noah moaned with appreciation. Soon, eyes glazed, he was panting and ready to come. The man stopped. Evan exhaled. He hadn’t realized he had been holding his breath, waiting to see Noah come.

Evan wanted to see it. He didn’t think about it, just clicked forward in the video to near the end. Noah was buried inside the other man’s body, pounding into him with even, determined thrusts. The other man’s head was thrown back and he was moaning loudly. He was clearly enjoying himself, hand on his own erection, tugging frantically. The man erupted, semen flowing onto his hand just before Noah pulled out and stroked his own cock, mixing his come with the other man’s.

Evan spent the next few hours watching more videos, clicking on the earlier ones that Noah had done. The man fascinated him. He had seen very few videos of the other guys. They just didn’t interest him in the same way.

As one of the pages loaded, Evan was shocked to see how young Noah had looked. He was tall and skinny, lanky, with shaggy hair and a cocky attitude. Still, the warm smile was the same, and the friendly blue eyes were there. He clicked on the first video, Noah’s casting couch. He looked all of about sixteen years old. Evan listened carefully to his interview, discreetly tucking away the information for later.

Noah was from South Dakota, and had moved to Idaho after he graduated. He had been fifteen when he had sex for the first time, and despite his small stature at the time, he enjoyed topping more than bottoming. Evan was proud that he knew what those terms meant. He had received quite the education over the past few hours. His horizons were just a little bit broader than they had been last week.

Noah liked to play sports, particularly hockey and soccer, and his favorite body part on a man was his hands. Evan stretched his fingers out in front of him. He had never really taken much notice of his before, but looking at them, he saw they were large in proportion to his size, with thick veins running over the backs and blunt tipped fingers. He had no idea if they were nice hands, but he hoped Noah liked them.

His eyes refocused to the screen as he watched Noah make himself hard. He stroked slowly up and down. Evan was rapt with attention, trying to memorize each and every minute movement. Noah pulled up, swiped his thumb across the tip, and swirled the glistening drop of precome under the ridge. The down stroke was tight, firm, but on the upstroke, Noah twisted his wrist slightly.

Evan was mesmerized and felt like he was about to burst from need. He restarted the video. When Noah began to touch himself, Evan slipped his hands down his body, feeling the warmth of his own touch across his skin as his fingers delved beneath the soft cotton of his boxers. He took himself in hand and mimicked Noah’s movements. Up, then down, slowly at first and then more quickly, finally adding the little twist at the end.

Holy God. The feeling of his hand stroking with the sight of Noah’s strong hands moving over hard flesh was overwhelming. He could almost imagine it was Noah’s hand on him again, moving more quickly now, bringing him higher and higher, closer to the edge.

When Evan finally fell over, his muscles were shaking with exertion and lust. He hadn’t lasted quite as long as Noah, who shook with his own release a few minutes later. Evan couldn’t move. He was submerged in the heavy weight of confusing emotions he was not yet ready to examine.

He tried to remain ignorant as to why he felt so compelled to see as much of Noah as he could, but by the time evening fell, Evan was sure he had learned every inch of Noah’s body.

Educating himself about the different terms on his contract had been eye-opening. On the one hand, he still couldn’t believe that people did some of those things to one another, but on the other, after watching the videos and seeing the reactions of the men, he was curious as to what it would feel like. They had to do it all for a reason, right?

All he knew was that he was tired and didn’t want to wake up to a stiff back and dried semen all over his stomach. He reluctantly rose and walked to the bathroom to clean himself up with the rough, over-washed towels before climbing into bed and cocooning himself in the scratchy sheets.

He was too tired to care though, and all too quickly, sleep claimed him.

THE next morning, Evan awoke for the first time in years without his alarm clock. Staring at the red numbers illuminated beside him, he realized he had slept in. It wasn’t like he had much to do. School was finished and the Sonic shoot wouldn’t begin for a few more days, but Evan needed to get to the clinic to be tested.

He knew he was clean. Abstinence will do that for you, but Les needed the paperwork no matter what, and he didn’t want anything to go wrong.

He was still incredibly nervous about the whole thing and a little unsure he could actually go through with any of it, but sometimes necessity overrules everything else, and he was determined to make it work one way or another. Besides, the first scene he had done hadn’t been too bad. It was actually nice that Noah had been there.

Evan had been afraid when Noah had stopped the taping that he would send him away altogether, but once they got back to shooting, the way Noah touched him, held him, and whispered to him, set him at ease and made the whole experience a little bit less difficult. He hoped Noah would be the one who would be there for his first few scenes at the house. Not that he had a whole lot of experience in the area, but Evan doubted he would feel as at ease with many of the other guys.

There was just something about Noah that drew him in. He had never met anyone like him before. He hadn’t spent too much time around the guy, but felt he knew him a bit better from watching the videos online. He needed to stop thinking about him, though. He felt like a schoolgirl with a crush, which was so confusing for him because he had spent less than an hour total with the guy. And, while for half of that hour Noah had his hand on Evan’s dick, he needed to pull himself together.

Soon enough the shoot at Newport would come and go, and then Evan would be off to school and would likely never see Noah again. Right now he felt a little sad at the idea of that, but Evan was used to people disappearing from his life. Maybe it would be easier to be the one who disappeared.

Evan decided to try not to think about it too much over the next few days or he was likely to drive himself insane before he even got to Newport. He pulled on his coat, shoved his feet into his running shoes, and left to catch the bus downtown to the clinic.