Chapter 4
By the time Kane joined us at the mall, Nichele was fully engaged in retail therapy and I hadn’t seen the ponytailed man again despite my nervous vigilance. The afternoon dragged interminably while Nichele foraged through store after store, loading Kane’s arms with a burden of shopping bags that would have bowed a lesser man.
At last the ordeal was over and we grabbed an early dinner in one of the restaurants attached to the mall. When the bill was paid, Nichele rose to her feet without her usual energy. “Well, I guess I’d better go home and get my game face on. I have to leave by seven and we still need to pick up my car from the office.”
“You should rent a car,” I urged. “You’re too easy to spot in that red Miata.”
“It won’t matter.” Nichele’s voice trembled just a bit. “I have to go home to get my suitcase and James knows where I live. All he has to do is wait there.” She tossed her head, putting on a confident act. “He won’t anyway. Why would he? Last time he only wanted me as a way to get money transferred to his offshore account. He’s too smart to try the same thing again, and he probably wouldn’t violate his parole anyway. I’ll be fine.”
“I’ll take you home,” I argued. “You can get your stuff and then I’ll drive you to the car rental place. You can leave in a different car from there and fly under the radar.”
“But then my car will still be at the office…”
“No problem,” Kane said. “Aydan will drive you home to get your things and then bring you to the car rental place. I’ll park my vehicle at your office and drive your car to the rental office, and then Aydan can drive me back to pick up my vehicle from your parkade.”
“But that’s ‘way too much trouble!” Nichele gave an uncertain laugh. “Aren’t we getting a little paranoid here? We’re not spies on some secret mission!”
Somehow I managed not to glance at Kane. “I know, but wouldn’t you like to have a hot new ride?” I coaxed. “Wouldn’t it be fun to show up in a Ferrari or Lamborghini or something? And then you could just relax and enjoy your retreat without worrying about looking over your shoulder all the time.”
“Oooh…” Nichele’s eyes lit up. “Well, when you put it that way… but it’s pretty short notice to rent an exotic car…” She rummaged in her purse and pulled out her phone. “Maybe they’ll still have something available. After all, it’s November and it’s the middle of the week. It should be past their peak time…”
We waited in silence while she dialled, and moments later she was the proud lessee of a Lamborghini.
“Perfect,” I said with relief. “Let’s get going.”
With Nichele safely on her way an hour and a half later, I pulled into the office parkade and turned off my car with a long breath. “Thank goodness. She should be safe for the next couple of days, anyway.”
“Yes.” Kane turned a piercing gaze on me. “So now are you going to tell me what’s really happening?”
My worry over Riel’s presence returned full force, and I swallowed to hold my voice steady. “Um…”
How much should I tell him? A glance at my wristwatch showed it was nearly seven-thirty, and I opted for procrastination.
“Do you have time?” I asked. “You’ve spent the whole day with us and I don’t want to take you away from Daniel.”
“I appreciate that.” Kane consulted his watch, too. “His bedtime is eight o’clock. There’s just enough time to go and get him tucked in, so let’s talk afterward.”
“Okay, should we meet at your condo? What time?”
Kane shrugged, a twitch of his shoulders that looked uneasy. “You might as well come with me to Alicia’s. I shouldn’t be long.”
“Okay…” I said slowly, but he didn’t seem inclined to elaborate.
“I’ll see you there,” he said instead and got out of my car.
Just as he backed his Expedition out of its parking stall, my phone vibrated. Stomach clenching at the sight of ‘Private’ on the call display, I accepted it. This likely wasn’t good…
“Hey, darlin’.” Hellhound’s weary rasp answered my cautious ‘hello’.
“Arnie!” My initial gush of relief was rapidly staunched by worry over the obscured phone number. “Where… um, how are you?”
“I’m okay. Still outta town. Didn’t get a chance to do the job today, but we’re gonna try again tomorrow. How ‘bout you? Did ya get to Nichele okay?”
“Yes, she’s fine and leaving town for a business retreat right now. She’ll be out of danger for a couple of days at least. And John came to help us out.”
“Good.” Relief warmed Hellhound’s voice, and he added, “Can’t talk long, darlin’, but I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. Maybe we can catch up if you’re still in town tomorrow.”
“That’d be good. I might stay at your place tonight even if you’re not there.” I stifled a cavernous yawn. “I’m bagged and I don’t feel like driving home.”
“Go ahead an’ crash at my place,” he urged. His voice deepened to a sexy tease. “I’m gonna have hot dreams of ya naked in my bed tonight.”
“Not as hot as if you were there,” I teased in return. “Stay safe. I love you. With zero commitment,” I added hastily.
He chuckled. “Love ya, too, darlin’. G’night.”
Warmed, I put the car in gear and headed for Kane’s ex-wife’s house. When I pulled to a stop at the curb, Kane sprang out of his SUV and hurried over.
“Sorry.” I forestalled his anxious look with an explanation as I got out of the car. “Arnie called, and I didn’t realize you’d be waiting outside for me.”
“It’s all right.” He turned and strode up the walk. Rapping lightly on the door, he turned his key in the lock and let us in without waiting for a response.
Bloodcurdling screams made me snatch my Glock from my ankle holster, my heart jackhammering my ribs.
Kane gripped my wrist. “No, it’s all right,” he muttered. “Put that away.” After I had obeyed, he called out jovially, “Hello, there! Who’s making all that racket?”
The shrieks stopped as if switched off, and a moment later Daniel pelted around the corner in pajamas, his blotchy crimson face dripping tears and snot. “Daddy-Daddy-Daddy-Daddy!” he wailed.
A harried-looking Alicia trailed him, and she jerked to a halt at the sight of me. Her hostile glare bounced from Kane to me and back to Kane again. “Nice of you to show up,” she snapped.
“I’m sorry,” Kane said as Daniel thumped into him and flung his arms around his father’s legs. “I got here as soon as I could.” He stooped to swing the child effortlessly up into his arms.
Daniel clung and buried his flushed face in Kane’s shoulder, leaving a glistening trail on the black T-shirt.
“Hey, Daniel,” Kane murmured in a soothing singsong. “We talked about this. Remember I said I might be a little late today? Remember you promised you’d let Mommy tuck you in?”
Daniel’s only response was a juicy sniffle as he tightened his grip, his chubby fists bunching in Kane’s T-shirt.
“Come on, then, let’s get you settled,” Kane added in the same reassuring tones. “Which bedtime story would you like tonight?”
Daniel mumbled unintelligibly into Kane’s shoulder as they headed down the hallway with Alicia behind them, leaving me standing there like the fool I was.
After a few minutes of awkward hovering, I quietly let myself out.
When my phone vibrated twenty-five minutes later, I picked up at the sight of Kane’s number.
“I’m sorry about that,” he said to my ‘hello’. “Are you on your way back to Silverside?”
“No, I’m at the Tim Horton’s down the street. It’s been a long day and I wanted a few minutes of downtime and a quiet cup of tea.”
His sigh was clearly audible on the other end of the line. “That sounds wonderful. Do you still have time? I can be there in five minutes.”
“I’ll be here.”
Precisely five minutes later he strode in, garnering appreciative glances from the female patrons and dark looks from the males. Shortly afterward he joined me at my table, carrying a cup of coffee for himself and placing a small box of doughnut holes in front of me.
“Yum! Thank you!” I popped open the box and surveyed the tempting assortment of sugar-coated spheres. “I shouldn’t, but I’m going to.” I selected a glazed chocolate morsel and popped it into my mouth. “I’ll regret this later,” I added, my words slightly muffled by sweet greasy goodness.
Kane smiled. “You work out hard enough to make up for it. And you won’t regret it much.”
“You know me too well.” I grinned and chomped down an apple fritter and a strawberry-filled Timbit before pushing the box toward him. “Take these away before I eat them all.”
He peeked into the box. “Aha. You left the old-fashioned sugar-coated ones for me.”
“Of course. For you, no sacrifice is too great.” Hand over heart, I sketched a bow before adding, “Also, old-fashioneds are my least-favorite.”
“I’m touched by your selflessness.”
“I know; right? And, hey, here’s another happy thought,” I added. “Now that you’re a civvie, nobody’s going to crack any lame jokes about cops and doughnuts.”
“For which I am truly thankful. This will be the first time I’ve been able to eat a doughnut without feeling like a cliché.” He popped a doughnut hole into his mouth and I tried not to have a hot flash while he licked off the sugar clinging to his fingers.
Dammit, I could still feel the touch of that tongue and those fingers in places that were aching to feel them again…
I jerked my hormones to an unceremonious halt as Kane plied a napkin and leaned back with a sigh, cradling his coffee cup. “I’m sorry about that scene at Alicia’s,” he said. “Apparently we haven’t made as much progress as I’d thought.”
“No problem.” I sipped my tea, firmly transferring my attention to the conversation at hand. “All kids get cranky around bedtime, don’t they? But he settled down the instant you got there. You’re a great dad.”
Kane grunted, hunching his shoulders. “Don’t be fooled. It was nothing to do with my parenting skills. If I’d been the one trying to put him to bed, he would have screamed just as frantically for Alicia. That scene plays out every night.”
“Oh.” I surveyed him over my cup. “Well, it hasn’t been that long since he was kidnapped. He’ll gradually realize he’s safe and you’ll both always be there for him; it’ll just take time.”
“I certainly hope so.” Kane sucked in some coffee as though the mug contained life-giving elixir. “This has been a nerve-wracking time. It’s gotten a little better since I started volunteering at the school, but still, every morning it’s an emotional bloodbath when we leave him in his classroom. Every night he has a meltdown if both of us aren’t there to tuck him in. He has night terrors and wakes up screaming. After being toilet-trained for years, he’s now wetting the bed regularly…”
He made a gesture of resignation, his hand dropping to the table. “The pediatric psychologist says it’s all part of the process and it should improve soon, but…” He sighed. “I don’t know, Aydan; I just… I didn’t expect it to be easy, but… having a child is nothing like I thought it would be.”
I reached over to squeeze his hand. “Said every parent since the dawn of time. You’re doing fine. He goes to you for comfort and he trusts you. Any parent would struggle with the kind of issues Daniel’s having, and you’ve been dropped into it cold without any chance to get to know him as a happy stress-free kid, and without a supportive partner.”
“That’s the other thing.” Kane’s hand tightened on mine. “Alicia is pressuring me to move in with them. Saying that if I truly cared for Daniel I’d make a stable home for him. That’s why I wanted you with me tonight, to disrupt her usual attempts. And I just…” Muscles rippled in his jaw, his lips pressing into a thin line. “I…”
He hissed out a breath. “Aydan, I’m so furious with her, I can barely contain it! She willfully cheated me out of six years of my son’s life! I never got to hold him as a baby. I wasn’t there for his first laugh or his first step or his first tooth. I don’t know what his first word was. I didn’t get to teach him to ride a bicycle. I wasn’t there for his first soccer game. I didn’t get to walk him to school on his first day…” He broke off, his hand clenching mine, his breath coming hard. “I’ve missed so much,” he gritted. “Precious memories that I’ll never have. Because of her!”
I clutched his hand in both of mine, my heart breaking. “Oh, John, I’m so sorry! I can’t imagine how awful that must be.”
“And do you know what the hell of it is?” He stared across the table, the storm raging in his eyes. “I want to hate her; but if not for her, I wouldn’t even have a son. This wonderful, frustrating, frighteningly complex little person who is both of us and neither of us… he wouldn’t exist. How the hell do I deal with that?”
“I don’t know.” I swallowed against the tightness in my throat. “I wish I could do or say something that would help.”
The tension went out of him on a long breath and he released my hand with a gentle squeeze. “You’ve helped just by hearing me out. And I’m sorry for dumping on you. I usually work out those feelings at the gym.”
I gave him a wry smile and gestured at his rippling muscles. “I can see how upset you’ve been.”
He twitched his shoulders in a self-deprecating shrug. “It seemed like a better solution than murdering my ex.”
“Yeah… I guess. Although to be honest, I feel like murdering her myself.”
Kane gave me a twisted smile. “I’ve got a couple of free gym passes if you like.”
“I might take you up on that.”
“So…” He leaned his elbows on the table, closing the distance between us and lowering his voice to a soft rumble that sent tendrils of warmth tickling through my belly. “Much as I enjoyed kissing you this afternoon, I’m not flattering myself that it was because you suddenly found me irresistible. What’s going on?”