CHAPTER TEN
“What do you mean Laredo’s gone?” Savannah didn’t understand what Caroline was telling her. He’d been on the ranch earlier that day; she’d seen him herself. They’d both made an effort in the past week to pretend their discussion had never taken place. But it had, and her declaration of love stood between them. It was something they could neither forget nor ignore.
Every time Savannah thought about the foolish way she’d exposed her heart, she grew weary with self-recriminations and regret. Her rash behavior had embarrassed them both, yet she realized she probably couldn’t have kept silent any longer. She loved Laredo, and hiding her feelings had become increasingly more difficult.
“He asked me to give you this,” Caroline said with a regretful sigh, handing her a rectangular box.
“It’s really pretty!” Maggie added enthusiastically.
“You’ve talked to him?” Savannah said. The pain was immediate. Laredo had left, and instead of coming to her, he’d gone to Caroline. He’d talked to Caroline, but not to her. He’d left without even a goodbye.
“He was on his way out of town when he stopped by and asked if I’d give you this.”
Savannah felt an overwhelming need to sit down. Slowly sinking onto a kitchen chair, she brought her fingers to her mouth to suppress a cry. Laredo isn’t coming back.
“Do you want me to open the box for you, Savannah?” Maggie volunteered, eagerly lifting a corner of the box as she spoke. “It’s so pretty and you’re going to like it. Mommy did and so did I.”
Caroline restrained her daughter by placing her hand on Maggie’s shoulder. “Let Savannah open it when she’s ready, okay, sweetheart?”
The child looked disappointed, but she nodded.
Savannah slid her fingers over the top of the box, but lacked the courage to look inside. All her strength went into holding back the tears that burned her eyes.
Laredo was gone. Without a word of farewell, without a note. Nothing. The pain of his leaving had devastated her. But in some odd inexplicable way she understood why he’d left so abruptly.
Laredo Smith couldn’t say goodbye. He loved her too much to hurt her more. Loved her too much to refuse if she’d asked him to stay. And so he’d done the only thing he could. He’d slipped away like a thief in the night; he’d stolen her heart and taken it with him.
“Savannah, are you all right?”
She nodded even as she felt swallowed up in the emptiness.
Caroline’s fingers gripped hers tightly. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
Somehow Savannah managed to look at her friend. She could lie and offer reassurances, but she hadn’t the strength to maintain a facade. It would be easy enough to fool Grady and Richard, but not Caroline.
“It’s a shawl,” Maggie blurted, unable to hold back any longer. “A pretty white one with gold—”
“Maggie,” Caroline snapped.
The little girl lowered her head and bit her lip.
“A shawl... How nice,” Savannah said, struggling. Knowing Maggie was impatient for her to open the gift, she pulled off the lid. The child was right; the shawl was quite possibly the loveliest one she’d ever seen. Lifting it from the tissue paper, she let the delicate fabric slide across her fingers. “Was there...did he give you any message for me?”
Caroline hesitated, then said gently, “He wanted me to thank you.”
Her heart was breaking, the pain raw and real, and yet—despite the emotional intensity of the moment—Savannah smiled.
“Thank you.” She repeated his message. This, too, she understood. The simple words held a wealth of meaning and in some ways were more valuable to her than the gift he’d asked Caroline to deliver.
Despite his desertion, Laredo had thanked her for loving him. Even though he’d walked out of her life with the same suddenness with which he’d entered it, he’d wanted Savannah to know her love had touched him. He couldn’t say it himself, so he let someone else say it for him.
Caroline’s eyes flashed with anger. “I don’t understand why he’d do such a thing! He admitted he loved you—he said as much.”
“I know.”
“But when I asked why he was leaving, all he’d say was that sometimes love wasn’t enough—whatever the hell that means.” Caroline sat down, then got to her feet again and started pacing.
Savannah didn’t try to explain. What Laredo apparently didn’t grasp, and what she’d been unable to make him believe, was that his love was the one thing she’d ever need.
He seemed to think a prosperous ranch would make her happy, or a million head of cattle. A luxurious ranch house. A rose garden. Those things gave her security and contentment, true. But Laredo’s love gave her happiness, and it gave meaning to everything else in her life. She’d tried to convince him that she’d happily work at his side, that their love would allow them to create a new security and contentment of their own. Why couldn’t he believe her?
“Can I go sit on the swing outside?” Maggie asked.
Caroline nodded. “Stay on the porch.”
Maggie assured Caroline she would, and the screen door slammed behind her. Caroline brewed Savannah a cup of strong coffee, then brought it over to the table. “Drink this,” she ordered. “You look pale as a sheet.”
Savannah raised the cup to her lips. Surprisingly the coffee revived her.
Caroline poured herself a cup and sat down next to Savannah. “I know you probably don’t want to hear this at the moment, but I’m going to say it, anyway.” She paused long enough to inhale deeply. “Right now, you’re hurting too much to believe that everything happens for a reason. I don’t know why, but that’s the way it seems to work.
“When I discovered I was pregnant with Maggie, I felt as if the world had caved in on me. I was young and stupid and determined not to let a mistake ruin my life. First I thought the father would marry me, but...well, that was impossible. I’d already decided I wanted to have this baby, so I was left to deal with the pregnancy alone.”
In all the years they’d been friends, this was the first time Caroline had discussed anything to do with Maggie’s birth. Or Maggie’s father.
“When I couldn’t hide that I was pregnant any longer, I had to tell my mother. I expected her to be furious, to call me all the names I’d called myself. Instead, Mom asked me a few questions and then held me. We both cried.
“It was what I’d needed most—her love. She talked about how difficult it must have been for me to keep this pain bottled up inside me all those weeks. I didn’t want to tell her about Maggie’s father, but I did, and how stupid I’d been to think he actually loved me...” Her voice wavered and it was a moment before she could continue. “You see, Savannah,” she whispered with emotion shining in her eyes, “this mistake was really a gift. I made a mistake, but Maggie’s not a mistake. She’s my heart and my joy. I can’t imagine life without her.”
The screen door opened just then, and Maggie flew into the room and raced across the kitchen. Breathless, she wrapped her arms around Caroline’s leg, hiding her face against her mother’s jeans.
Grady followed her inside, looking frustrated and confused.
“What’d you do this time?” Caroline demanded.
“Not a damn thing,” Grady said. “I saw Maggie outside and thought it was time the two of us talked, but it seems she’s not ready.”
Maggie clung to her mother’s leg all the harder.
“It’d help if you hadn’t yelled at her on the phone,” Caroline suggested calmly.
“How was I supposed to know it was Maggie?” he shouted in return.
“He’s yelling again,” Maggie surfaced long enough to announce.
“Explain to her that it was all a mistake, would you?” Grady said in a strained voice, gesturing at Maggie. “She’s right, I was a beast. But I’m willing to be a prince, too, if she’ll give me the chance.”
“You’re too mean to be a prince,” Maggie said next. Breaking away from her mother, she climbed into Savannah’s lap and locked both arms around her neck. “I don’t like Grady ’cause he yells.”
“He’s not one of my favorite people, either,” Caroline said, glaring at Savannah’s brother.
“What’d I do now?” he groaned. “Damn, but it’s hard to understand women. I haven’t talked to you in days—what could I possibly have done to offend you?”
“You know very well what you’ve done.”
Clearly perplexed, he shrugged. “I’m afraid you’re going to have to tell me, because I haven’t got a clue.”
“You’re lower than a...a worm,” Caroline said.
“So what else is new?” Grady sounded bored.
“Caroline?” Savannah said her friend’s name softly, confused by the display of anger. “What did Grady do?”
Still glaring at him, Caroline crossed her long legs. Her foot swung with a furious rhythm. “I wasn’t going to tell you,” Caroline said, speaking to Savannah, “but you’ll figure it out soon enough. Grady gave Laredo the money so he could pay off the repairs on his truck.”
Savannah felt as if she’d been punched, as if the air had been forced from her lungs. She looked at her brother in shock and pain and disbelief. The abruptness of Laredo’s leaving was almost more than she could bear, but knowing that her own brother, her own flesh and blood, had made it possible—had no doubt encouraged it—was like a knife in the back. She gasped. “Grady?”
“I didn’t give him the money,” Grady said, and his gaze darted between her and Caroline as if he didn’t understand what he’d done that was so wrong. “I lent him the money.”
He’d betrayed her.
There was nothing more to say.
Barely aware of what she was doing, Savannah stood and slowly placed one foot in front of the other. Hardly knowing how she’d managed it, she climbed the stairs to her room, dragging herself one step at a time.
“What’d I do that was so terrible?” her brother shouted after her. “Tell me, Savannah! I want to know!”
“Leave her alone,” Caroline said angrily, her voice drifting toward Savannah as she climbed the stairs. “If you can’t figure it out, trust me, I’ll be happy to fill in the blanks. And you know what? I’ll use small words so you’ll be sure to understand.”
* * *
Grady delayed speaking to Caroline about Laredo for ten days. He knew he needed to say something—to explain, to talk about Savannah, to ask her advice. He saw her enter the Winn-Dixie one evening and followed her inside. He didn’t want Caroline to assume he’d sought her out; he intended her to believe their meeting was accidental.
Taking a cart and maintaining a safe distance behind her, he trailed her into the produce section. Savannah was the one who did all the grocery shopping, and other than picking up a necessary item now and again, he was rarely in the supermarket.
He paused in front of a pyramid display of bright juicy-looking oranges, and with one eye on Caroline and the other on the task at hand, he reached for an orange. To his horror, the entire display collapsed.
Grady saw it happen as if in slow motion. He attempted to catch as many as possible before they tumbled to the floor, his arms moving frantically in every which direction. In the end he abandoned the effort, kneeling on the linoleum floor surrounded by fruit.
Everyone in the produce department stopped and stared at him. Even small children pointed and snickered. Grady smiled weakly and searched for a witty remark, but like everything else these past few weeks, his wit failed him.
He was about to turn tail and run when Caroline squatted down beside him. “This is another fine mess you’ve created, Grady Weston.”
He didn’t need Caroline to tell him that. If he wanted to make a fool of himself, he wouldn’t choose to do it in front of half the store. Nope, he preferred to manage that with just one or two onlookers. Like Caroline. And his sister.
Together they gathered the spilled oranges and set them back on the display case. “Is there a reason you followed me in here?” she asked bluntly.
“Was I that obvious?”
“Don’t apply to the Secret Service, all right?”
Since it was entirely obvious that running into her hadn’t been an accident, he got straight to the point.
“Do you have time for coffee?” he asked, and then because he was afraid she might think he was asking her out, he added, “I’m worried about Savannah. I’d feel better if I talked about this with someone.”
She checked her watch, and Grady had the feeling time wasn’t her major concern. “Talked about this with just anyone?” she asked.
“With you,” he amended, burying his pride. He owed Caroline this much.
“Let me phone the day care,” she said, “and then I’ll meet you at the bowling alley.”
“Okay. See you there in a few minutes.” He was eager to make his escape before he toppled a display of something really embarrassing—like feminine hygiene products.
The café in the bowling alley served some of the best food in town. It was certainly the most reasonably priced, with coffee only a quarter a cup. They served decent coffee, too. There was always a special; according to the reader board outside, today’s was T-bone steak and a baked potato. And the place stayed open all night on weekends. In Grady’s opinion, it was a damn good deal. Although he wasn’t interested in a steak at the moment.... Even if he’d been hungry, he couldn’t have choked it down.
Arriving first, he found an empty booth and turned over two mugs. The waitress brought him a couple of menus and smiled. “Haven’t seen you in a while, Grady.”
“Hello, Denise. How’re Art and the kids?” Grady had attended high school with Denise a hundred years ago. While he was out chasing cattle, his classmate had married, had three kids and started working here part-time.
“I can’t complain. Billy’s in junior high this year.”
Hard to believe, Grady thought. Art and Denise’s oldest boy was reaching his teens and he wasn’t even married yet.
Denise filled his mug with coffee. “Are you going to order something to eat?”
“Not me, but Caroline might.”
“Caroline Daniels?” Denise filled the second mug.
He nodded, disliking the flicker of interest in her eyes.
“Are you two seeing each other now?” she asked, her interest far too avid.
Grady opened his mouth to deny everything. He didn’t have to.
“No way,” Caroline answered for him as she slipped into the booth. She handed Denise the menu, effectively dismissing her, and reached for the sugar dispenser. “You had something you wanted to say about Savannah.”
“Yeah.” This was more difficult than he’d imagined.
“Is she all right?” Caroline leaned back against the patched red vinyl upholstery, and he noted for the first time how pale she was. He didn’t comment because sure as hell she’d make something of it—something he’d never intended. His only chance to have a peaceful conversation was to stick to the matter at hand and ignore everything else. Still, he wondered.
“How come you haven’t been out to the ranch?” he blurted. His sister needed a friend, and he’d expected Caroline to be there for her, especially now.
“I stopped by a couple of times when you weren’t around.”
“On purpose?” he asked, thinking she’d taken to avoiding him because of Maggie.
“No, it just happened to work out that way. I haven’t gone anywhere in a couple of days. I’ve been dealing with postal inspectors all week. I had my own crisis to handle, but fortunately that’s behind me now.” She cradled the mug between her hands. “I’ve phoned Savannah every day.” Her eyes held his. “Is something going on with her that I don’t know about?”
“Not with Savannah, exactly,” he said, then looked away, finding her scrutiny uncomfortable. “First off, I was wrong about Laredo Smith.”
That captured her attention, he could tell. She raised her eyebrows but said nothing. Not yet, anyway. Naturally she’d delight in hearing how wrong he’d been.
“I should have accepted Savannah’s assessment of his character,” Grady said, embarrassed that he’d allowed his fears to get in the way. Admitting he’d made a mistake had never come easy. “I...came to some, well, erroneous conclusions about Smith. The result was that he and I got started on the wrong foot.”
“You should tell Savannah this, not me.”
“I have!” he snapped, then took a deep breath in an effort to control his impatience. When he spoke again, he lowered his voice. “I did tell her, but I wanted you to know, as well.”
“Should I be grateful?”
Grady decided to ignore the sarcasm. “Laredo came to me and asked for a loan. Despite what you think, I’m not blind. I knew something wasn’t right. I didn’t want him to leave and I told him so.”
This appeared to surprise Caroline. Her eyebrows rose again. “You did?”
“Yes—not that it did any good. In the end I agreed to lend him the money and he insisted on giving me the title to his truck. The day he left I apologized for the scene at Richard’s party and we shook hands.” He stared into the steaming mug. “I took my aggravation with Richard out on Laredo and made a complete ass of myself.”
Caroline didn’t disagree with him. Not that he expected she would.
“Although it’s none of my business,” he said, “Laredo as much as admitted he loved Savannah.”
“He told me that, too.” Caroline shook her head in dismay. “What I can’t fathom is why he felt he had to leave. What is it about men? I don’t understand it. Laredo Smith is loved by the sweetest, kindest, most wonderful woman he’s likely to meet in ten lifetimes and what does he do? He walks out on her without a word. It doesn’t make sense.” She tossed her hands in the air as if to say she’d never understand the male of the species.
“A man has his pride, especially a man like Smith, but my guess is Richard had something to do with it.” It was the first time he’d suggested this to anyone, and he was curious to see how Caroline would react. He half expected her to jump all over him and insist he quit trying to blame Richard for everything, including the national debt. She said nothing for several moments.
“I wouldn’t put it past him,” she murmured at last.
Grady was so damn grateful that she agreed with him it was all he could do not to hug her right then and there. If Denise was going to spread rumors about him and Caroline, that would give her something to talk about.
“Did you ask Laredo if Richard said anything to him?”
“No,” he told her reluctantly.
“Why the hell not?”
“Well, because...I was trying to get him to stay.” Grady didn’t know what Caroline had thought he could do. It wasn’t like he could hog-tie the wrangler until he agreed to marry his sister. Grady hadn’t intended to tell Caroline this, but suddenly he wanted her to know. “I offered Laredo a partnership in the ranch. I realize now it must have come as quite a surprise to him. Hell, I surprised myself.”
He’d already known Savannah was in love with Laredo; that day he’d learned about Smith’s love for Savannah, too. This man was important to her happiness; if it was in Grady’s power to make her happy, he was willing to do whatever it took.
He noticed how Caroline’s face tightened as she considered this information. “What’d he say to that?”
Glancing away, Grady relived the terse conversation. “That he didn’t accept charity and I’d insulted Savannah and him. Hell, everything I do these days is wrong. I was only trying to help.” He reached for his coffee. “At first I thought Laredo didn’t love Savannah, but now I think he loves her too much.”
Caroline gave a hard shake of her head. “As far as I’m concerned, he’d better not show his face around here, because I swear I’ll wring his neck if he does.”
Grady was a little taken aback by the vehemence of her response.
“All this crap about pride and honor—it’s asinine, that’s what it is.” Her lips thinned. “Never mind him. How’s Savannah doing?”
“You said you haven’t seen her in the past couple of days, didn’t you?”
Caroline nodded. “Why? What’s up?”
“Something’s happened—she’s changed.”
“Of course she’s changed! She’s hurt and angry. And I can’t blame her.”
“It’s more than that.”
Caroline leaned closer. “What do you mean?”
“Like you said, she’s hurt—but I can’t imagine how that would lead to...this.” He didn’t know how to say it without sounding demented, so he just plunged in. “Hell, I don’t know what’s happened to her, but two days ago she cut her hair.”
“Savannah?”
“It’s been long for so many years I didn’t recognize her. It’s shoulder-length now and in a—” he made a circular motion with his finger “—pageboy, I think is what you call it. The ends tuck under sort of nice and neat.”
This left Caroline speechless.
“Then yesterday I found her in jeans.”
“Savannah?”
“Yeah. I didn’t know she even owned any.”
“But why?” Caroline asked, clearly puzzled. “Why’d she do these things?”
“I have my suspicions and I’ll tell you right now, it makes my blood run cold.”
“Really,” Caroline said thoughtfully, “when you think about it, what’s so terrible about Savannah cutting her hair and updating her wardrobe?”
“I’m worried.” Grady didn’t mind admitting it, either. “This morning I saw her standing on the porch looking down the driveway as if she expected Laredo to come back. Personally I wish to hell he would, but I don’t think it’s going to happen.”
“I hope you didn’t tell her that!”
“Of course not!” What kind of idiot did Caroline think he was, anyway? “Then she told me Laredo Smith was a fool,” he added.
“I couldn’t agree with her more,” Caroline muttered.
“You know what I think? I think Savannah’s decided to look for a husband.” He spoke quickly, finding the subject of marriage an uncomfortable one with Caroline.
Caroline gave an elaborate shrug. “There’s nothing wrong with marriage, although neither of us seems interested in it.”
“I agree—nothing wrong with it. But I’m afraid that in Savannah’s current frame of mind any man will do.”
“Did she have someone in mind?”
“Not that I’m aware of.” But Grady knew his sister, and while he wasn’t an expert, he recognized the look. Savannah was on the prowl. And when a woman set her mind on marriage, he believed, there was damn little a man could do but run for shelter.
“You’re sure about this?” Caroline frowned.
“Not a hundred percent, but it’s fairly obvious.”
Then to his consternation, Caroline burst out laughing.
Grady didn’t take kindly to being the butt of a joke. “What’s so damned funny?” he demanded.
“You! I don’t think Savannah’s on the prowl, as you put it, but if she does find a decent man to marry, more power to her. There’s too much love in her heart to waste. If Laredo doesn’t want to marry her, then so be it. Eventually she’ll find a man who does.”
“In some tavern?”
“Savannah’s not into that scene.”
“That’s what I thought, but then Richard...” Grady hesitated, uncertain he should tell her this, but if Caroline could help...
“What about Richard?” she asked, her laughter draining away quickly.
It helped that his no-good brother hadn’t fooled Caroline, that she recognized the kind of man he was. “Richard offered to take her barhopping and introduce her around.”
“Terrific,” Caroline said sarcastically. “All the best men hang around bars. Is she going to do it?”
“I don’t know,” Grady said. “I just don’t know.”
* * *
Glen Patterson sat down in front of the television with a cold can of soda. He was supposed to meet Ellie for dinner, but she’d phoned and said she’d be hung up until after seven. This was a difficult time for his friend. Twice this week he’d made excuses to drive into town and check up on her. The last report he’d heard on her father wasn’t good. The doctors seemed to think John Frasier wouldn’t last more than another week or two.
“You’re frowning,” Cal said as he stepped into the living room. It wasn’t as neat and orderly as when their mother had done the housekeeping, but it wasn’t as bad as it might’ve been, either. The two brothers had hired a woman to come in once a week to clean ever since their parents had retired and moved into town to open a bed-and-breakfast.
“I was just thinking,” Glen said.
“Worried about Ellie?”
“Not really.” He downplayed his concern rather than admit it to his brother.
“Maybe you should be worried,” Cal said as he claimed the recliner. He sat down and stretched out his long legs.
“Do you know something I don’t?”
Cal didn’t look at him when he spoke. “I hear Richard Weston’s got his eye on her.”
“Richard? He’s harmless. Okay, so he likes to flirt, but Ellie knows that.”
“You jealous?”
If anyone understood his relationship with Ellie, it should be his own brother. “Why would I be jealous? Ellie and I are friends. Nothing more. Nothing less.”
Friends. It shouldn’t be a difficult concept to understand. Cal and Grady Weston had been good friends for years. It just so happened that his best friend was a member of the opposite sex. People had been trying to make something of it for years.
Cal regarded him skeptically.
“What?” Glen asked in annoyance.
“Men and women can’t be friends.”
Glen had his older brother on that one. “Wrong. Ellie’s like one of the guys. She always has been—you know that.”
Cal folded his hands over his trim stomach. “In other words, it doesn’t bother you she’s been seeing Richard.”
“Not in the least.” It did a little, but not enough to really concern him—and not for the reasons Cal might suggest. Glen was afraid that Ellie was especially vulnerable just then, and he didn’t want Richard Weston to take advantage of her.
“You know how Grady feels about him,” Cal said.
“Yeah, so what? Richard wasn’t cut out to be a rancher—we both know that. He has a right to come home now and then, don’t you think?”
Cal was silent for a moment. Then he said, “If I were you, I’d keep my eye on Ellie.”
Glen found himself frowning again. Cal had a suspicious nature but he hadn’t always been this cynical or distrusting. Glen traced it back to Jennifer Healy—Cal had been engaged to her a couple of years ago, and Jennifer had dumped him. Afterward Cal’s disposition had soured, particularly toward women. It bothered Glen and he’d tried a number of times to steer his older brother into a new relationship, but Cal didn’t seem interested.
“Well, I know for a fact that Richard can be a real bastard,” Cal added. “If you’re Ellie’s friend, like you say, you’d better warn her.”
“Warn?” Obviously Cal hadn’t been around her often enough. Ellie had a mind of her own and wouldn’t take kindly to his interference.
Anyway, he just couldn’t take Richard seriously as a threat. An annoyance, yes, but not a threat.