The following day, after Mel had left for work, Luke drove to the farm, his thoughts scattering like leaves in the wind.

Callum’s eye was black now, the bruise a deep purple ring that covered not only his eye but the top of his cheek as well. The eyelid was firmly shut and Luke wondered how he was going to explain it to the school. They’d have to think of a story and he’d have to make sure Callum stuck to it. They could say it happened playing football, couldn’t they? The last thing he needed was social services getting involved.

It’s time to do something decisive, he thought, instead of just hoping that things are going to be different.

His mother watched them walk into the kitchen, her puzzled smile turning to a horrified frown when she saw Callum’s eye and the scratches on Luke’s face. She shooed Tessa and Callum into the living room, where Ceri was home-schooling her children, while Luke put the kettle on.

Luke’s heart sank when his mother came back into the room with his dad and Ted behind her.

A family meeting. But then, wasn’t this what he’d wanted? Some help to decide on how best to get himself out of the mess he found himself in. It was an impossible situation that had no easy solution, but hopefully, with everyone involved, they could come up with something that might work.

‘It was Mel who did that to Cal, wasn’t it?’ His mum’s eyes were wild, an expression of hatred on her face that Luke had never seen before.

He hung his head.

‘How can she possibly hurt you, Luke?’ The sneer in Ted’s voice made Luke look up. ‘You’re way bigger and stronger than she is. For Christ’s sake! You’ve got to stop being a wimp and start fighting back.’

Ted’s words held barbs that pricked and pulled at what little was left of Luke’s courage, taking all the strength from his legs. He pulled out a chair and slumped onto the seat.

‘You have no idea,’ he mumbled into his chest. ‘No idea what it’s like. I just seem to wind her up.’ He ran a hand through his hair. ‘Most of the time everything is fine, absolutely fine, and then I say something and she flares up. It’s like a lightning strike.’ He shook his head.

‘Luke, I can’t stand by and see this happening.’ His mother’s voice was stern. ‘You’ve got to report her to the police.’

He looked up and caught her eye. ‘I can’t, Mum. She’d tell them some story, make out it was my fault. And she’s threatened to take the kids off me. Because she’d tell them…’ Just voicing his concerns sent his mind into a tailspin and he rubbed his hands over his face as if to scrub the thoughts away.

‘Tell them what?’

This was it. He bit his lip, wondering how he could tell them. Looked around at the three pairs of eyes that were fixed on him, waiting. He took a breath and blurted it out. ‘She knows about the… the cannabis business.’ The betrayal of his family’s trust wrapped around his chest, pulling tight until he could hardly breathe.

Ted’s eyes widened. His mum leant on the back of a chair to keep herself steady. His dad rubbed his hands over the top of his head. Luke longed to be a child again. Life was simple then. No decisions to make, the only conflict being little squabbles with the other kids in the house. Nothing like this; the horror of being torn apart by conflicting priorities. Sweat dampened his shirt, making it stick to his back.

‘No, Luke, you didn’t,’ his mum gasped. ‘Why on earth did you have to tell her?’ She stared at him, mouth open, and his gaze slid away. ‘Goddammit! Luke, you stupid, stupid…’ She grunted her annoyance at the ceiling before glaring at him. ‘I thought you’d promised we’d keep this in the family? That you were happy to keep her and the kids out of it?’

‘I didn’t tell her, Mum. I didn’t. She found my stash.’

Ted stood up, his face reddening with rage, finger pointing at Luke. ‘How could you be so careless? This is an important source of income for us. Not to mention vital for Ma’s health.’ His voice was getting louder as he forced his words through clenched teeth. ‘And you’ve just… you’ve messed everything up. We’ve worked on this for years. Years. And you’ve just ruined it!’

Luke shrivelled inside, his body hunching as Ted’s onslaught pounded him.

Ted leant over the table towards him, shouting. ‘You stupid bastard! You can’t be trusted with anything can you, you’re—’

‘Enough! That’s enough!’

Fay’s hands gripped the back of the chair, knuckles white, looking between the two men, her jaw set. There was no doubt she was fuming, but there was something else in her expression. Disappointment, Luke thought, and that cut him deeply. He was at the centre of a whirlpool, drowning and pulling everyone he loved down with him.

‘Right, let’s sort this out.’ His mum inched herself round to sit on the chair she’d been holding on to, and Luke could see the weariness etched on her face. ‘So, what happened this time?’

Luke looked down at his lap, started rubbing at a stain on his jeans. ‘She wants a baby. That’s what we were fighting about yesterday.’

‘What!’ Luke jumped, startled by his mother’s shout. She was staring at him open-mouthed. ‘You can’t bring a baby into that household. Look what she’s done to the children.’

‘She just gets a bit cross, that’s all. Wants them to have better manners, you know, that sort of thing.’ Luke wondered why he was defending Mel after everything she’d done, but every attack on her felt like an attack on him. It had been his decision to marry her, after all.

His mother looked scornful. ‘You’ve got to open your eyes, Luke. They’re kids. At that age, words are the harshest weapon. You tell a kid something negative often enough and it’s in their heads forever.’

Luke couldn’t look at her. ‘I know, Mum. I know. Anyway, I’ve er… I’ve had a vasectomy, so a baby isn’t going to happen. But I honestly don’t know what to do now.’

‘Just move back here.’ Fay’s arms were crossed over her chest, her face hard and stern. It was an order, not an option.

Ted looked at his aunt, incredulous. ‘What? Weren’t you listening? If he leaves her she’ll tell the police, and then we’re all in trouble.’

‘Not just that.’ Luke shook his head. ‘She said she’d get custody of the kids.’

His mother’s hands went to her cheeks, the thought so appalling it stole any words she was about to say.

‘How much does she know?’ His dad sounded tired. And old. The weight of responsibility squashed Luke a little more. His dad didn’t need this sort of worry, not at his age. He should be taking life a bit easier by now, not having to mop up after his son.

‘She found my stash, Dad. And she had me followed. She says she has photos of my drops all the way up the coast.’

Ted slammed a fist on the table, making them all jump.

‘You stupid bastard! You’re back five minutes and look at the trouble you’ve caused. If we didn’t have this side to the business, we wouldn’t be able to live here.’ His arms were flying all over the place, as he spat out the words. ‘The farm’s only covering its costs. It brings in a little, but with just me fit enough, if we’re all being honest here, it’s never going to make enough money for us to live on.’

Luke looked down at his hands, picked at a hangnail. He didn’t need telling. That’s why he’d made such an effort to make things work with Mel.

‘You weren’t to know, son,’ his dad said. ‘Love’s a funny thing, makes everyone a little blind.’

‘I know you never liked her.’ Luke clasped his hands tighter, remembering the way his parents had looked at Mel the first few times she’d visited. He could tell they weren’t sure and yet he’d ignored any reservations he might have had.

Fay nodded. ‘No, she always struck me as a bit false. I could see her looking down her nose at us while she pretended to be pleased to see us. Look how quickly she stopped coming to visit.’

‘I did warn you about her,’ Ted said, his finger stabbing the air in Luke’s direction. ‘I knew she was trouble. It was all too quick. She pushed you into marriage and you let her. You stupid, weak bastard.’

‘Ted, calm down,’ Fay snapped, giving him a look that would freeze water. ‘In fact, why don’t you go and do something useful. You’re not helping here.’

Ted stared at her, mouth open.

‘Go on.’ She waved him away. ‘Off you go.’

Ted clamped his lips together and after a moment, he stomped out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

When he’d gone, Fay let out a long sigh.

‘He’s getting worse, I swear. So much anger in the lad and always wants to have things his way.’

Silence settled in the room.

‘So…’ Phil looked round the table, worry creasing his brow. ‘What are we going to do?’

The conversation went round in circles as they talked through all the possible options, but to Luke, nothing seemed realistic, because he knew how vindictive Mel could be. That was the scary thing about all this. How far would she go?

Finally, Fay brought the discussion to a close. ‘Okay, well, I think we need to give our brains a bit of a rest, sleep on things tonight and see how we feel in the morning.’ She looked drained and Luke knew that with her MS, stress was the worst possible thing for her, increasing the chances of a flare-up of symptoms that would leave her in bed for days. He watched his mother shuffle out of the room, holding on to furniture and the door frame to keep herself steady. As soon as she was gone, Ted came back into the kitchen and shut the door.

Luke turned to him, frowning. ‘You’ve been listening, haven’t you?’

Ted ignored him and sat next to Phil at the table. ‘We can’t leave things up in the air like this.’

‘We’ve had a good run at it,’ Phil said, staring at the table, where his fingers stroked a knot in the wood. ‘Maybe it’s time to knock it on the head. Think of something else to grow instead.’

‘But Ma needs the pain relief. You know we’ve tried everything else and nothing worked. She turned into a complete psycho when the doctor put her on those steroid things. That’s why we’re doing this. It’s all for Ma.’

Luke could feel his anger bubbling up inside, Ted speaking to his father as if Luke wasn’t there, as if he was his son.

Phil nodded. ‘Maybe we should move to America. I know a lot of states out there are giving licences to grow cannabis for medicinal use.’

Ted gave a dismissive snort. ‘Come on, Da. Don’t be daft. They won’t let us all in, will they?’

‘We could go on a visitor’s visa and just stay?’

Phil looked hopeful, no doubt thinking of Californian sunshine to finish his days.

‘I don’t think it’s that easy, Da. And if you’re there illegally there’ll be no healthcare. You have to have health insurance and they won’t give you that now.’ He pressed his lips together; a determined expression that Luke knew well. ‘No. We keep on doing this and we find a way to persuade Mel to go away and keep quiet. That’s what we need to do.’

Phil got to his feet and stretched. ‘Well, good luck with that. My brain’s addled. I’m going to catch up with your mum, get off to bed. Hope I find inspiration in the night or something.’

Luke got up as well, no intention of being left alone with Ted. ‘Look, I’ll go back tonight, just me, and see if I can smooth things over, buy us some time while I work out what to do.’

‘It’s not a solution, is it?’ his dad said. ‘She’ll always have this hold over you and now you can’t give her what she wants… who knows what she’ll do.’ He shook his head. ‘You be careful, son. And come home if you feel threatened in any way. Your life is what’s important here.’

Luke nodded, but as he was driving home he didn’t feel that his life was important at all. Not when he’d ruined everybody else’s. The closer he got to the house, the more certain he became of what he must do. He would take his family on holiday, as his boss had suggested, and that would be the end of this life, the end of everyone’s misery.