Chapter Ten
Katie
He was going to kiss me. Cash was leaning in, he was touching my neck and giving me chills. He was going to kiss me, and then his little brother and cousin had set something on fire. Was that the universe giving me a sign? Had I wanted him to kiss me? Yes. When he leaned in, I wasn’t scared like I had been with Braxton. I was a little nervous, but mostly excited. I didn’t know Cash, not really. But innately, I liked him. I trusted him, and I wanted to be next to him. Did that even make sense? Was I still high?
My hand was in his and he was leading us into the barn, the heat from the fire warming our skin as we edged past it. The red barn was everything that I’d wanted it to be. Old, large and red.
“What the hell are you two doing?” Cash let go of my hand and threw his arms wide.
Marley I’d met earlier, but Jett was new to me. They looked alike, more like brother and sister. Even though Avory had assured me that no one was actually blood related. They both had black hair and olive skin. Marley was still wearing her glasses and Jett was wearing a backward baseball cap like Cash, his hair curling around the edges. Marley was balanced on the top of a really freaking tall ladder and Jett was casually holding it in place with one hand. When Cash yelled at them, Jett jumped and the ladder started to wobble a little.
“Could you not?” Marley shouted down at her cousin/brother. “If I fall, we’ll for sure have to hit up the ER.” She rolled her eyes and then started prying a rotten-looking board loose with a bright yellow crowbar.
“It’s not my fault Cash came in with some chick, screaming like he’s someone else’s parent.” Jett jiggled the ladder, on purpose that time. Causing Marley to flip him the bird.
Someone else’s parent? I snorted, oh I got it. Because their parents never busted them when they were doing stuff they weren’t supposed to. Ha. I liked Jett.
“Who’s the dime piece? I thought you were done pimpin’ yourself for Crue?” Jett was looking over his shoulder, speaking to Cash.
“Did he just compare me to drugs?” I wrinkled my nose. Maybe I didn’t like Jett after all.
Cash furrowed his brow. “What?” Then shook his head slightly. “No. Dime piece, not dime bag.” He turned his attention back to the two entrepreneurs. “What are you guys up to? Why are you renovating the barn?” His hands were on his hips and he did look very parent like.
“Uh, because it’s a piece of history and it deserves to be saved.” Jett had a huge duh tone to his voice.
I smiled. “Aww, that’s really nice of y’all. I bet this old place would—”
“I’ll ask you one more time, and if you don’t answer me honestly, I’m going to go get Beau and Halen and let them deal with you.” Cash pointed out to the large entrance, I assumed toward Halen’s house. “And if I go get them, you’ll lose a full day to interrogation.”
Jett looked at Marley and she gave a slight nod, but didn’t stop what she was doing. “We need the barn. It’s the furthest from the parents. But it needs a lot of work. None of our equipment would be protected from the elements if we moved it in now.” Jett stomped his foot on the ground. “And it has an old storm cellar.”
“There it is.” Cash pointed his point-happy finger, jabbing it in his family’s direction.
There what was? Maybe they had a genuine fear of tornados? I certainly didn’t see what the big deal was.
Cash crossed his arms over his chest, making his shirt stretch tighter against his biceps. Not that I noticed that kind of stuff or whatever. “You two are a prison sentence waiting to happen, you know that, right?”
“Since when do barn restorations lead to jail time?” We had several old barns on our ranch, and none of them had ever sent anyone to the big house. “I think it’s commendable what they’re doing.” I nodded at the two kids. “This place would fall to the ground without their hard work.”
“Thank you…?
“Katie,” I provided.
“Thank you, Katie.” Jett winked at me, but it didn’t cause the same reaction in my stomach as when his older blonder brother did it. “See? Why can’t you be more like your new hot friend here? Take the story we’re throwing your way at face value and move on.” Jett waved his hand in the direction of the entrance, indicating that we should leave. And also that he was lying about the restoration project story, and maybe that I was gullible.
Cash took a deep breath, and then sort of unleashed. “Your small little operation down by the tank? That was easy to ignore. But this? An underground grow house and a lab? How long until a parent stumbles upon it? How long before you get caught? You’re minors, you don’t have the licensing or the permits, this is all illegal.”
“You’re right. So you better get Katie out of here before the fuzz busts in and arrests us all.” Marley climbed down off the ladder, dusting her hands off on her jeans.
Cash looked between the two of them, and started pointing again. “This isn’t over.”
Marley rolled her eyes and handed Jett the crowbar. “Same time tomorrow?”
“Let’s go.” Cash grabbed my hand, leading us back out the way we’d come. “Those two are trouble—seconds away from a fucking disaster.” He was stomping and huffing and puffing. When he opened the truck door, I was almost afraid he was going to rip it off the hinges. But he shut it gently.
“I’m a little lost here.” That was an understatement of epic proportions. I was a lot lost. It seemed like every conversation these people had was spoken in code. I had no idea what was going on or what anyone was talking about.
He started driving, farther away from where I knew the Conners’ house was. “Jett and Marley are…botanists.” He ran his hand down his face. “They like to experiment with plants and stuff. But the plants aren’t really legal for them to own. So.” He turned to me. “You think we could not discuss Jett and Marley anymore? I’ve had enough of their brand of stress for today.”
Not legal plants. Okaaay. “Sure.” We were both quiet for a few minutes, letting the radio and the bumpy drive soothe us into a trance. But then I saw some cows and I started to feel bad for wanting to tip them over in their sleep. Which made me start to think of the list, which made me think of Cash. Which, in turn, made me think of something Jett said back at the barn of bad choices. “What did Jett mean when he said he thought you’d stopped pimping yourself out for Crue?”
“Oh, uh, nothing.” He shrugged one shoulder. “He was just being Jett, just being an ass, trying to take the spotlight off of him and Marley.”
Well that was evasive as hell. I was a normally passive girl, but I was real tired of living in the dark when it came to these kids. And I’d promised myself that I’d start standing up for, well, myself. There was no time like the mother-effin present. “You wanted to kiss me, right? Back there before we got to the barn, you were going to kiss me.”
Cash stopped the truck, giving me his full attention. “Yes.”
“Right. So, um, here’s the thing. I’m not one of you guys. I’m not one of the Devil’s Spawn. I’m not one of your cousins. This is all so new to me, so far outside of anything I’ve ever experienced. I’ve been here less than forty-eight hours and I’ve already been to a party, drank, danced with strangers, lied to parents, smoked pot, and been privy to more than one conversation that I’m pretty sure could make me an accessory to a crime.” I took a deep breath. I’d already come this far, may as well keep going. “I wanted you to kiss me. I was more than ready to cross that little item off my list, but I need you to let me in. A little bit.” I laughed quietly, mostly to myself.
“I don’t understand your private conversations, or your codes, or your half-truths. I’m not one of you, and I haven’t lived this life. I’m not asking for you to spill your guts, but if you want me to let you in…If you expect me to trust you with these big moments in my life, I need you to return the favor.” Wow. That felt freaking amazing. I got irritated, and then I stood up for myself. I spoke my mind and I let it all out. Was this how my little brother felt all the time? There was definitely something to be said for airing your grievances.
Cash was quiet for several seconds, and I was almost afraid that he wouldn’t tell me what I wanted to know. But then he cleared his throat. “Do you remember last night when I told you that we all worked really hard for Crue and Avory, to help them keep their secret?”
“Yeah?” I’d thought that was an odd statement, but I’d only know the guy for like two hours by that point. I assumed it would have been rude to push for more information. But now that I’d known him for twelve hours and he’d blown smoke in my mouth, I was over my manners.
“Once upon a time, Crue Matthews was a player. A fuck boy. He was a whore the likes of which this small town had never seen before.”
I couldn’t help but giggle. That was a great opening to a story, in my opinion. “That sounds so romantic.”
“Well, one day, he fell in love with Avory Conner and everything changed.” He looked down at his hands, his tone losing all its humor. “They are my family, Katie, they are my best friends. I wanted them to be happy, and I wanted them to be together. Avory is good for Crue. She makes him want to be a better guy, I guess.” I watched him work to swallow and my enjoyment of the story started to slip away. “We’ve all seen how hard it can be on the family when there’s a relationship, you know, between any of us. We saw it with Halen and Beau. They’re fine now, but there was a lot that went down before they could get to this point.”
“So that’s why you keep things from your parents?”
He nodded, his eyes still trained in his lap. “Crue and Avory being nervous was, uh, understandable. None us know exactly how the ‘rents would react, so we keep things between us. It’s easier this way. And it works out, for the most part.”
He got quiet again, and I started to get scared. “Cash?”
“They didn’t want anyone at school to find out, because if that happened then eventually the parents would find out as well. In order to accomplish that, Crue had to keep being a whore. He couldn’t suddenly change. People would start to wonder, start to question and dig for answers. We’re the Devil’s Spawn—they’re always interested to some extent.” His short laugh didn’t hold any humor. “I, uh, became Crue. Not all the time, but for over a year I went on his dates and I hooked up with the random girls and I did everything that he did before he fell in love with Avory.”
I closed my eyes, wanting so badly to un-hear what he’d told me. What I’d asked him to tell me. “You lied to girls. You told them that you were your twin…so that you could hook up with them?”
He shook his head. “It’s not like that. These girls, they um, they only wanted to be with Crue because of his reputation, because of who our dad is, because of RiffRaff Records. They didn’t care about me, and they didn’t care about Crue.”
“You lied to them.” I wasn’t sure why I was shocked. That was the first thing he’d helped me cross off my list. Lying. It was what all these kids did. They lied to everyone. They lied to their parents. The only people they didn’t lie to were each other. Was I supposed to find that commendable? Did they?
“I did, I lied. But only to protect my brother, my family.” He finally looked at me, his gaze holding mine. “I hated it, Katie. I hated every damn second of it. I’m not that guy. I’m not my brother. I don’t like random hookups, I don’t like shallow, fame-hungry girls.” He grabbed my hands. “That’s not who I am, that’s never been who I am. I promise.”
“I’ve known you for two days, Cash. You lied to girls pretending to be your twin for over a year.” I pulled my hands away. “How the hell am I supposed to know who you really are?”
“Katie, please let me—”
“I need, I uh, I think I’m going to walk home.” I opened the truck door, hopping out quickly.
Cash followed me, coming around the back and reaching for my hand. “Please don’t do that. Let me at least take you back.”
“I need some time, some space.” I moved my hands behind my back, out of his line of sight. “Today has been…a lot. And I think I need some distance. I’m not used to being around so many people and, uh, the walk will do me good.”
“You asked for me to let you in, Katie.”
I nodded. “I know.” I turned in the direction of what I hoped was Avory’s house. Cash grabbed my shoulders and spun me to the right. “Thanks.”
“Katie.”
“I’ll be fine.”
And I would be. I could walk back to the Conners’ house, I could figure it out. I could be alone and I could think and I could sort the last twenty-four hours out in my mind. I didn’t need Cash’s help, like I didn’t need my parents constantly hovering over me and checking in. I was eighteen, and it was high time that I started to think and act for myself.
I liked Cash. I wanted him to be my first kiss. I liked the way he made me feel and the way he saw me. Everyone had a past, and I wasn’t faulting him for his. I was simply shaken by the realization that no matter how great the day had been, how cute and kind he seemed, I didn’t know him. I didn’t really know any of them.