Mike

We saunter to our house, and Daisy clings to my arm as the midnight stars twinkle above our heads. A cloud of vapour leaves my mouth.

I’m floating in my own thoughts.

I have to be like an anchor for my wife. I have to be patient and she has to mature. Slowly, year after year.

I have to be like a rock for my son until he matures. I guess the next forty years of my life will be about kids.

I like kids.

I want this shit called a family with four kids.

I want Rebel to be my family.

“I know what’s wrong with you, Mike.”

“What? Nothing’s wrong with me.”

“I mean…” Daisy chews her lower lip. “You were raised in foster families. You had no childhood.”

“I had what I had.”

“You were never a kid like me. Such things stay with people for life. I see how you love the Shadow Wolves. We all love you too. We always will no matter what.”

“Time to go to the Spanish Pyrenees?”

“Yes.”

A stripper passes us—the girl has been employed here for about a month and a half. She stops, moves back and stands in front of Daisy.

“I heard,” she says. She strokes Daisy’s arms with her hands. “I’m happy for you.”

“Sally, right?” I say.

I don’t deal with the club whores or strippers—that’s Rita’s job, always has been her job.

“Yes.” Sally nods.

I step back. “The boys are waiting for you in the bar, Sally.” I don’t like her. I don’t know why but she wakes something creepy inside me each time I see her.

She chuckles. Her hand reaches back to her jean skirt.

“Greetings from Yegor Voronin,” she says.

I see a flash in the light of a street lamp. It’s a blade. Daisy rotates her body, but the knife digs into the side of her chest. My cold instinct awakes. I grab Sally’s head and throw her to the ground. The knife clatters against the pavement as she recovers like a piece of coil spring. Daisy falls to the ground. I steel myself.

A gunshot tears at the air.

Sally descends to the ground and convulses. A pond of blood forms around her head, dark like the ocean at night. I see Rebel kneel by Daisy.

“Call the ambulance, Dad,” he says.

My hand shakes as I take my phone out.

My wife pants then her breathing becomes shallow like life is evaporating from her.

***

Daisy’s sad eyes lock on mine. She’s half-sitting on her hospital bed. She presses her hand against her tummy and her eyelids flutter. Tears trickle down her cheeks.

“I’m so sorry,” I say as a lump forms in my throat.

Star lays her head on the pillow next to Daisy’s. Rebel squeezes my wife’s hand in his.

“Take me to my parents,” Daisy whispers.

“As soon as you’re discharged,” I say. “Get some rest now.”

“Okay,” Daisy hums.

We’re sitting in silence. Star strokes Daisy’s head.

 I watch my little family then bow my head at Rebel. He bows back. We rise to our feet and leave the hospital.

We hunt a member of the Broken Crusaders MC.

We throw him into the car boot and go into the woods. We remove his nails, one by one. We knock his teeth out, one by one.

When we start chopping his fingers off, he starts burbling.

Sally was sent by the Broken Crusaders. She found us in the Devil’s Tears’ compound, but she didn’t manage to report back to the Broken Crusaders about it. I assume nobody has managed to report back to the Voronins either.

I put a bullet into that scumbag’s skull and we dispose of him in the woods.

Daisy recovers.

I bring her to the compound. We pack two bags and go to the Spanish Pyrenees.

Two days later, we step into Zane’s house. Brianna is so concerned about Daisy’s pregnancy she forgets to reprimand me. Yep, Dimitri’s lack of mercy during the training sessions saved my little rat and the baby rat in her womb. The knife just slid against her ribs and didn’t cause any serious injury.

Zane is so stunned with the prospect of becoming a granddad, he forgets to knock my teeth out and Dimitri just flicks his eyes over his machete and pats my shoulder.

We go to church and I spill everything about Lizzie and Rebel.

There’s silence—cold and harsh then Zane nods.

“I… I fucking… relieved,” Zane says.

“You did the right thing,” Dimitri says. “I fucking want to grab my machete, son, but you did the right thing.”

“Who was Lizzie?” Tyler asks. “Mom sometimes mentions this name.”

“Old times,” Dimitri says. He nods several times. “I sometimes make wrong decisions too and the good people have to fix it.”

We finish church and go upstairs. Brianna bombards me with questions as we settle ourselves in the living room.

“You have a son,” Brianna says and looks at me like I’m some fucking alien.

“Lizzie had a life,” Rey says, “unlike others. It was the best thing to do regarding the circumstances.”

“To the training room,” Zane says as we finish our beer.

I nod as adrenaline fills my veins. I will be covered in bruising soon. I’ll have my nose broken. I’ll have my fingers broken, maybe even an arm broken. I’ll have my honour back.

Dimitri rubs his hands together and rises to his feet. An evil grin crosses his face.

I’ve never fought with Samael. I can’t wait to.

Daisy

Four months later.

Mike and I are standing in our kitchen and he’s talking over the phone. He wrinkles his forehead and disconnects.

“What’s going on?” I ask.

“Gunner Junior is in trouble.”

“Gunner Junior is always in trouble.”

“This is serious. He can expose us all.” Mike threads his fingers through his hair. His jaw muscles twitch. “They’re going to take him out of jail.”

“Auntie Sive—“

“No, not this way. It’s too late to do it by this route.”

Ice fills my veins. “When?”

“Tomorrow. Gunner didn’t say anything to anyone until it was too late. There’s no other way.”

“I’ll pray for them.”

“You’d better.”

Mike

Daisy jumps onto my lap as my phone rings. I grab it and answer it. It’s Zane. He starts talking. I don’t understand at first. It’s a blur to me because my brain rebels against that dreadful news coming out of his mouth.

“What?” I growl. “Zane, you fucking—“

“Shay is dead,” Zane says. “And we can’t even bury him.”

“There must be some fucking mistake,” I say.

It can’t be. It’s too impossible. Not Shay. Not that good and smart kid.

“Mike,” Zane says as his voice falters. “Tell Daisy.” He disconnects.

Silence rings in my ears then I hear my own heart thumping. I look at my wife.

“I heard everything,” she says. “The speaker was on.” She shudders and slides from my lap.

She stands three steps away from me, her face white like that of a sculpture in a medieval church. She tilts her head, takes a sharp breath and emits a scream.

Tears blind me, and I can’t move.

Daisy moves back, turns around and leaves the house. I rise to my feet. Everything stiffens inside me. There’s no room for my emotions. I have to be all for Daisy now.

I catch up with her by the compound’s wall.

“Daisy,” I say gently.

“Not Shay,” she sobs.

“We bury those left behind in our hearts and live our fucked up lives. You said that.”

“I know.”

“Our baby—“

“I know.”

I can see her collect her wits.

“Tell Rebel to come to our place,” she says, her voice crystal, strong. “We should drink vodka to Shay.”

“I know, baby.” I throw my arm over her back and kiss the top of her head.

***

Two months later.

Gabriel offers me a cigarette. I light it and inhale the smoke as my eyes roam over the garage. Ten bikes stand at the wall. The smell of petrol, oil and tyres settles in my nostrils.

“I’m gonna fucking miss my bike,” Gabriel says in a gruff voice.

“Going somewhere?”

“To hell. Soon. I have this big hole in my lungs, remember? It’s gonna kill me sooner or later.” He smokes his cigarette as I freeze. “I wanna ask you for a favour.”

“Ask, brother,” I rasp and throw my cigarette to the floor, crushing it under my foot.

I will buy myself an e-cig as soon as possible. I don’t want to end up like Gabriel.

Gabriel chuckles at my gesture then coughs. It sounds like there is glue in his lungs. He pats my shoulder, and a delicate sense of loss wafts through me as pain pricks my heart like a needle.

“Star,” he says.

“Daisy and I will take care of her when you—“

He nods. “No man will ever want to take her, ya know.” He nods again. “She’s kind of dumb.” Concern fills his eyes.

“She’s special, that’s all.”

“Yeah, she is special. The doctors called it autism. She can be very smart, but other times, she’ll be dumb as fuck.” He squeezes my shoulder. “That bitch, Monica, left her for hours. Star must have cried in her cot for hours.” His voice falters, strangled by raw emotion. “For hours.”

“Daisy and I will take her to our place if you decide to go to hell one day. She’ll be like our daughter, I promise you, brother.”

I don’t know what else to say to give him peace so I say nothing.

“Thank you,” he says and clears his throat. “Your boy likes her. He’s always liked her. He’s a good kid.”

Yep, Rebel is a good kid. He will take Star as his old lady the moment Gabriel lets out his final breath, but I’m not going to enlighten the former president.

“I thought I’d go to Tibet,” Gabriel says. “While I still can. Star’s gonna move in with you the next week.”

I chuckle. “How long are you going for?”

“For a year, maybe a year and a half. I’ve always had this dream to see Tibet.”

“Take some photos.”

“I’m gonna meditate not take photos.”

I erupt into laughter. “Are you gonna shave your head?”

“Possibly. I’m gonna quit smoking for sure.”

“You’d better.”

“Let’s have some beer,” Gabriel says and slaps me on the back.