Daisy

Mike jumps on his bike and holds a hand for me.

“I want to ride on my bike,” I shriek.

Not that I don’t want to cling to his back. I want to be close to him very badly, but I want to take my bike too.

“Jump on my bike,” Mike says.

No, he’s commanding me. My glance meets Sol’s and she rolls her eyes.

Right. My life’s gonna change.

My mom hugs me again then my dad hugs me again.

“I just want you to be happy,” my dad says. “I… I… am…”

“I’m very happy,” I say. “Don’t worry.”

Dad winks at me and nods several times. It seems like his whole anger has evaporated. “Mike’s a good man. And you’re like me. I can’t blame you.” He strokes my arm then approaches Mike and hands him a piece of paper.

I know deep down my dad and I are good. Mom and me? Well, we’ll see.

Everyone else hugs me. Even Tyler hugs me and I see concern in his eyes, which is kind of weird. Cindy starts crying and clings to Auntie Athena.

I settle myself behind Mike and wrap my arms around his chest. He starts the engine and we shoot forward.

My dream is happening right here and right now. It’s just that Mike is acting weird. He’s nice, but very cold. I prefer his meanness to his coldness. He cares more when he is mean.

We ride for five hours and stop in front of a motel. As I slide from the bike, my ass hurts so much I groan. I put my palms on my lower back and straighten.

“You know where we’re heading to, right?” Mike says. “There’s no room for being a weak princess in the compound. You’d better start growing a thick skin.”

“I’ll be tough, I promise, Mike.”

I love him so much. I’ll be for him in every way he wants me to be for him.

We check-in and Mike guides me to the café situated on the ground floor where we eat a meal in a graveyard-like atmosphere.

“Where are we going to live?” I ask.

“I have a static caravan, but I’ll ask the president to give us a house.”

I can live in a caravan, that’s not a problem for me. “I can cook. Rey taught me how to cook.”

Mike nods and looks through me like I’m a piece of glass.

“I can clean and iron,” I say. “I’m not a spoiled brat. I can do a lot of things.”

“Can you suck a dick off?”

My hand jerks forward. I nudge my drink and spill it over my lap as Mike flashes me a grin.

“I thought so,” he says.

“I… can learn.” I grab a paper napkin as my heart thumps in my ears, and I press it against my thigh to dry my jeans.

“I’m gonna send you to university.”

“When?” My heart stops beating and ice fills my veins.

“As soon as possible.”

I feel like I’m falling down into a chasm. “I can take a course online or something. Or study part-time.”

“Have you finished eating?” He rises to his feet, picking our bags up, and rushes towards the exit as I run after him.

Something is wrong. This wrongness is brushing against the back of my neck like an exhale from a cold damp cellar.

We enter our room and Mike puts the bags on the floor by a narrow desk that protrudes from the beige wall.

“I can take care of our belongings,” I say. “What do you want to do now, Mike?”

His eyes bore through me. “I want you to have a shower and go to bed.” He runs his fingers through his hair. “I’ll have a few drinks downstairs. Don’t leave the room.”

Our glances meet and I feel like I’m disintegrating. “Okay, Mike.”

He walks off.

I freeze as my heart turns into a piece of ice and crumbles into a thousand pieces. My whole body hurts. My brain hurts. He just left and it’s our wedding night.

I shuffle to have a shower as tears blind me. A wound forms inside of my chest. A burning never-ending wound.

He is mean. That’s a good sign. That’s normal.

I claw at this thought like my life depends on it.

I wash myself, brush my teeth, put my lace pyjama set on and dive under the comforter.

Then I wait for my husband, but he doesn’t come back.

Mike

I need solitude.

I need a magic wand.

I quit smoking a few years ago, but tonight I need a cigarette. I ride to the nearest petrol station and buy a pack of cigarettes then I smoke three and dispose of the rest.

What a fucking mess.

Am I really taking her to the Devil’s Tears’ compound? They’ll destroy her. I’ll destroy her.

I’m responsible for her. It’s high time for me to be the adults here. Yeah, sending her to university is a good idea. She’ll be far from me and far from the Devil’s Tears.

I stare at the cloudless night sky for a moment. An urge stirs inside of me. I want to lie down beside her and make this marriage work. But I fucking know deep down it won’t work so I jump on my bike instead.

I have a glass of beer in a pub, ten miles away from our motel, and return to Daisy. Her sniffling greets me as I walk in.

She sits up, her eyes red from crying. “Mike?”

“Why aren’t you asleep?”

“I’ve been waiting for you.”

“I told you—“

“Have I done something wrong?”

I shake my head. “No.”

I’m like a fucking wrongness that does everything wrong.

I grab my stuff and go to the bathroom. After a long shower, I slip into my pyjama pants and lie down beside Daisy. My hand travels to her shoulder and I stroke her arm. She’s so cold my fingertips brush against her goose bumps and she shivers under my touch. I pull her into my embrace and hold her against my chest.

She’s so fucking soft to touch and smells as flowery as spring. My dick awakes.

“It’s been a long day,” she shrieks. I’d like her to be quiet, but she takes a deep breath and starts squeaking, “I’m a quick learner, Mike. I’m not stupid, you know, and I can grow up fast. I can be mature.” Her arms encircle my neck and she trembles against me. “I promise, Mike, I’ll be a good wife to you. I will love you with my whole heart, I swear.”

I really want her to shut up.

I lever myself up on my elbow then close her mouth with mine, kissing her desperate gasp.

God, those lips of hers, so plump, so soft, so strawberry in taste. I’m addicted to her mouth.

I crawl on top of her and pull her shorts aside, sliding a finger into her heat. Her wet cunt clamps around my digit. My sense of control evaporates without a trace.

I pump my finger in and out then remove her shorts and free my rock-hard dick. She sucks in a breath as I drive my cock into her. Her face sharpens with pain as her body stiffens beneath mine.

“Daisy?” I ease my weight on my elbows.

“Sorry, Mike. So sorry.”

Daisy

I can see he wants it rough, but, unfortunately, his wife is an inexperienced eighteen-year-old who lost her virginity merely a week ago. My pussy feels like a real fire has seized it and I want to please my husband so badly.

I’m hopeless.

His whores are good in bed. Bile rises up to my throat and kills my desire.

“I’m sorry,” he says. “You need more time.”

I smile through pain. “I’m fine, Mike.”

His hands rest on either side of my head then he kisses me tenderly. “We will make it better for you.”

I don’t want him to make it better for me. I want him to enjoy me. I want to see fire in his eyes, but I see only concern. I want to be enough for him, yet I’m only a package of trouble for him.

I feel like I’m useless and totally unattractive, yet I smile for him.

My marriage is a disaster, yet I smile even brighter.

Mike pushes my knees wide apart and slides his hand between our bodies. His finger searches for my clitoris and he strokes it expertly. Flutters of pleasure fill my tummy.

I don’t know what to do with my hands so I just wrap my arms around his neck.

Tension builds in my tummy as Mike rubs his thumb against my clitoris harder. My muscles relax then tense as I rise to my peak, wave after wave. Pleasure surges through me, but it’s kind of blurry, laced with desperation—I’m high for one eternal second only to fall to the bottom of sadness the next moment.

I feel like we are strangers to each other. I’m all nervousness.