The last two days dragged by. Aiden hated when he had off. Chief Duncan knew if there was overtime available, he’d be the first to jump in line. Work always helped him more than sitting at home by himself, the silence eating him alive. Of course, overtime was rare.
For the first time, he missed not just work, but heading to the café for his usual coffee. On his days off, he never ventured to the café. Hell, he rarely ventured out of his house, even though he hated the loneliness.
Theresa was starting to invade his senses. He couldn’t figure out how she did it. He had managed to keep his emotions in check since Cynthia died. Looking at another woman, let alone having dirty thoughts, was unacceptable. The last two days, he couldn’t get Theresa out of his head, or the thought that he should’ve kissed her on the lips instead of a chaste kiss on the cheek.
What was that about?
He told her it was because of the mistletoe. Which was mostly true. He did kiss her because they had been standing under the mistletoe. He couldn’t deny he also did it because he couldn’t control the impulse. He wanted to kiss her. That was something he hadn’t wanted to do in a long time. Too long, actually. He shouldn’t have given in. Kissing her, even as innocent as it was, probably gave her the wrong idea. He wasn’t looking for a relationship. Next time he stood under a mistletoe, there would be no kissing. Better yet, he’d never stand under one again.
It wasn’t right. These feelings were wrong and unwelcome. It’d be in his best interest if he skipped going to the diner for his coffee. That way he wouldn’t even be tempted to get Theresa under the mistletoe again and kiss her properly. On the lips with some tongue.
Yep, it’d be much better if he didn’t go to the diner.
Yeah, and how did that work out for him last time? He lasted, what, thirty minutes, before he caved in and went to get his coffee. Pathetic.
It wasn’t the coffee he craved. When he thought about it, which he tried his damndest not to do, he didn’t think he ever went to the diner for just coffee. He went because he wanted—
Thinking shit like that wasn’t helping. He knew better. He wouldn’t do anything but cause her pain. That’s all he was good for.
“Have a lovely day, Aiden.”
His steps slowed as he neared the front door of the precinct and glanced at Daphne, who sat behind the front desk counter.
“Yep. You, too.”
“Just one little smile. My Christmas gift from you.”
“I don’t do gifts, you know that, Daph.” He winked. The closest thing he’d offer besides a smile. She asked every day for one, and every day he could never muster one up even to make her happy.
“One of these days...” She shook her finger at him as she laughed. “Oh, are you stumped on a gift for your mom? Because every year you rush at the last minute trying to figure out what present to get her.”
That statement hurt. Daphne obviously tried to make it sound like every year meant every year for years, when in reality, it meant last year only. Every year before that, Cynthia handled the gifts. For everyone they knew. Not because he couldn’t handle it. Because she liked to control everything. She always thought she knew best.
So laughable. His mother never liked any of the gifts he gave her. Not that she ever voiced it. But he saw it in her eyes every time she opened them.
Not last year, though. He did have to scramble to grab a gift for her because his emotions had been haywire. He thought he had a better handle on everything, but he was obviously wrong. The strange feelings he had for Theresa was a prime example.
“It hasn’t crossed my mind yet.”
“Well, I have it on good authority that Theresa is finally taking orders to make necklaces for people. She makes such awesome jewelry. I don’t know why she didn’t start ages ago.” Daphne flashed another sweet smile. “Anyhoos, I think your mother would love a necklace made by her. You should ask her to make you one. But I’d hurry. I hear she has quite a few orders to do already and she might get too busy to make any more.”
Here he was trying not to think about her and Daphne was throwing her right into his thoughts. Even worse, she was forcing him to go speak to her. Because damn it, his mother would like a necklace from her. A memory filtered in as he remembered a comment she made one time on the necklace Theresa was wearing when they all ate at the diner as a family.
“Thanks, Daph.”
He left before she talked his ear off for the next hour, which was something Daphne excelled at. She loved to talk, no matter the topic of choice.
Pausing on the sidewalk, he glanced both ways. Right to the café? Left to his car? Making decisions sucked, yet he found his feet moving to the right. He always got a coffee and he’d be damned if his erratic thoughts about Theresa would sway him from getting what he always did.
The bell above the door jangled as he pulled it open and stepped inside. His eyes glossed to the mistletoe above.
Nope, damn it. No thinking about kissing.
He took a seat on a stool and waited patiently while Theresa helped a couple with a toddler at one of the booths to his left. He knew she worked from eight in the morning until five thirty every day. Yet she never looked as tired as he imagined she was. Who wouldn’t be rushing from table to table every day? The town might be small, but the café usually had steady business.
She turned, halting in her steps when she made eye contact with him. Did she feel the attraction between them as well? Or was the jerky movement more of a great-I-have-to-deal-with-him sort of halt?
Making her way behind the counter, she grabbed the coffee pot and a foam cup. Neither spoke. Not even polite pleasantries. He felt like a jerk not saying hello, but the words were stuck in his throat. Why did it keep happening more and more with her? Each time he saw her, he just wanted to soak up her beauty and sweetness. He needed some of that in his life.
No, you don’t. You don’t deserve it.
She set the coffee cup in front of him and smiled. For once, he wanted to return the smile, but he stopped himself.
“There you go.”
“Has your brother been bothering you lately?” Just like that, her smile disappeared. What was wrong with him? Where did that question come from? He was curious, especially since he didn’t trust her brother, but he never intended to ask that question.
“My brother isn’t your concern, Officer Crowl.”
Ouch! She sure knew how to put him in his place.
He stood up and leaned forward, his mouth inches from hers. She froze, not moving away as he wanted her to. As she should. Talk about playing hell on his nerves. He wanted to close the distance and claim her lips.
“It is when you call the cops.”
“Then I’ll stop calling you—the cops.”
“He’s dangerous. You better call if there’s a problem.”
Her breath hitched. “He’s not dangerous. He’s just…he needs help.” Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears. “Why do you pretend to care?”
Pretend? She had no clue. Nothing he did was fake. Half the time it took extreme strength to control himself. Like now. He was finding it very difficult not to grab the back of her head and kiss her senseless.
“It’s my job.” Smooth answer, idiot. Well, he wasn’t looking for a relationship, so he couldn’t say anything else.
“Have a nice day, Officer Crowl.”
She effectively dismissed him. Didn’t he deserve that? Why did he start the entire conversation about her brother anyway? He leaned back as he pulled a five-dollar bill from his wallet. Oh, yeah, he did it because he needed to keep his distance. Making her hate him would help accomplish that goal.
He threw the five down and grabbed his coffee. Any trace of happiness she had disappeared. His eyes glided to the necklace around her neck. What would it hurt?
“Can you make my mother a necklace for Christmas? I think she’d like one.”
Theresa’s hand shot to the one around her neck, fingering the beads. Her face bloomed a light shade of red.
“I’m pretty…my orders lately…I’m sorry. I don’t think I’ll have time to complete it before Christmas.”
Whack! It’s as if she slapped him. He had a hard time believing she couldn’t get it done in time. There was still two weeks left before Christmas. She just didn’t want to make him one. He didn’t blame her one bit. He acted like a jerk almost all the time with her.
“No problem.”
He walked away before he said something he’d regret. Or worse. Did something he’d regret. Like pulling her across the counter and kissing her. The sound of the bell ringing as he pushed open the door had him glancing up to the mistletoe. Dumb thing. He never wanted to see another mistletoe in his life.
Long, quick strides to his vehicle almost made him feel like he was running. Well, wasn’t he? He was good at running away from his problems. The best at it. He’d been doing it like an ace since Cynthia died. Shit. Maybe even before she died.
He stopped at his car, yanked his keys out of his pocket, and set his coffee on the hood. Before he could click the unlock button, a voice spoke. Glancing up, he didn’t even pretend to hide his annoyance. Of course, that didn’t deter Marybeth, the worse nuisance in town. Perhaps on the planet.
“Hello, Aiden. How are you?”
“Busy.” He clicked the unlock button and moved forward to get her to move back. He wanted to jump inside and drive far away. Just keep driving until he felt free and whole and like a normal human being for once. He didn’t think that would ever happen again.
Except Marybeth didn’t move and he stood way too close to her. He knew she had a real thing for Chief Duncan for the longest time, but she always had a perverse way of flirting with any man. Him included. Hating to be so in her face, he took a step back. She had the audacity to smirk and chuckle.
“Did you forget, silly?”
“About?”
She clucked her tongue, then rubbed a hand down his arm. “Oh, you did. Are you okay? I know it’s hard with Cynthia gone, especially around the holidays, but it’ll be okay.”
He shook off her hand that insisted on resting on his hand. “I’m fine.”
“Well, you weren’t at the meeting yesterday.”
“What meeting?”
She had the nerve to look peeved that he forgot whatever it was she thought he was supposed to remember. He honestly had no clue what she was talking about.
“The committee meeting that puts on the annual Christmas party. It’s in a week and, while we have most things done, you said you’d help on the decorating crew.”
“When did I ever say that?” He knew for damn sure he would never do something like that. Maybe when Cynthia was around he would’ve been suckered into helping, her insisting it would be good for him. He’d cave because if he didn’t do it, well, things could get real ugly, real fast when he declined to do something for her.
“Last year. Remember? You made an off-hand comment at the party on how some of the lights hung crooked and you could’ve done a better job. I asked if you’d help next year to put up the decorations and you said yes.”
He sighed. Marybeth sure knew how to twist words to her liking. Just one of the many things he couldn’t stand about her. He never liked her when Cynthia was alive and they were inseparable, and he sure didn’t like her now. In fact, he had no reason anymore to be nice to her since Cynthia was gone. Except his mother would have his hide if he was rude. She raised him to be a gentleman, not an asshole. Of course, he kept acting like one with Theresa.
“I never said that.”
“Yes, you did.”
He couldn’t recall the conversation word-for-word, but he knew he’d never volunteer to help hang decorations. He did remember how one string of lights hung sort of low, yet the way they were situated made it look like it was done intentionally. He was positive that’s how he phrased it. And she never asked him to help this year. He hadn’t even wanted to go to the party, but Bentley, his best friend, forced him to get out of the house. No one would be forcing him to go to the party this year.
“Well, it’s too late now. I missed the meeting.”
“No, it’s not. I took notes. We can meet later to discuss them.” Her eyes sparkled with mischief. “After your shift. At your house.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling more tired than annoyed by Marybeth’s clear way of trying to insert herself into his life. And why? Because Chief Duncan was now off the market? What made her think he’d ever want a relationship with her? Because it would be a cold day in hell before that happened.
“Officer Crowl, I’m sorry for…” Theresa’s words died as he turned his body slightly and she saw Marybeth standing in front of him. “Oh, you’re busy. I didn’t see you there, Marybeth.”
“Theresa.” Marybeth smiled, yet Aiden could see the disdain in her eyes.
“Never mind. I’ll leave you two alone.” Theresa turned to leave.
His hand shot out, grabbing hers before she could step out of his reach. Although the cold snaked around him, his hands freezing from the low temps outside, the warmth from her hand heated him up. All over. Inside and out. He almost dropped her hand from the electricity coursing through him. Almost, but he couldn’t. The ache of desire was too strong. Instead, he pulled her a few steps closer, tempted to drop her hand and wrap his arm around her waist so she could be as close as possible to him.
The feelings she invoked were so unwelcome. Regardless, he didn’t drop his hand from hers.
“Marybeth was just reminding me I volunteered to help hang decorations for the annual Christmas party. I forgot about it.” Lies. He never volunteered in the first place. But an idea formed the second he grabbed her hand and he couldn’t seem to toss it aside.
“Okay.” Theresa’s eyes glossed to their hands, then back to his face just as quickly. “I’ll let you guys talk about that.”
“You should be there, too.”
“I should?”
“She should?”
The surprise in both of their voices didn’t surprise him. What surprised him was that he actually agreed to volunteer and that he wanted Theresa there.
“You have a knack for decorating. You said you enjoyed decorating. You can help me.”
Theresa’s eyes narrowed. Would she call him out on his bullshit? The slight glare in her eyes said she might. Because she never told him she enjoyed decorating. Although, he did like how she decorated her tree, so that wasn’t a lie. She did have a knack for it.
She nodded once. “Sure, I don’t mind helping.”
He glanced back at Marybeth and almost produced a smile. His heart suddenly felt lighter. As if he’d been waiting for a moment like this. To lift his spirits for once.
“Why don’t you just give me those notes you took and Theresa and I will take a look at them?”
Marybeth pursed her lips. Then a silky smile appeared. “I’ll drop them off later. The party is next Saturday. Mrs. Contreas wants everything up on Friday. Do not be late or forget.”
“We’ll be there.” He squeezed Theresa’s hand, but she didn’t say anything.
Marybeth gave him a saucy smile, no glance to Theresa, and walked away.
Holding Theresa’s hand was starting to make him itch with desire. So much so, he wanted to pull her roughly into his arms and kiss her. He was just about to let his control snap and do that when she yanked her hand free and took a step back.
“What was that?”
❄
Her hand still tingled from his touch. The confusion swirled around them with the brisk cold wind.
“I figured you’d enjoy it.”
Her eyes bulged out. He didn’t know her at all. No clue whatsoever about her likes and dislikes. Because she did not want to help decorate for the annual Christmas party. Why would she? She’d never been invited to it in her life. Growing up in the dismal part of town ensured that never happened.
“Why would you think that? I’ve never been to the Christmas party before.”
He frowned, his eyes narrowing, obviously trying to remember if she’d ever been to one. Which she hadn’t.
“Haven’t you ever wanted to go?”
“No.”
She opened her mouth to elaborate more, but decided against it. He didn’t need to know she always felt inadequate around Marybeth, Cynthia, and all the other girls that always made her life miserable in high school. They were always the bell of the ball, so to speak. Why would she want to surround herself around people like that? And around Christmas, a holiday she loved. All it would do was make her hate the holiday.
“You lied. You know I never said I enjoyed decorating.”
He shrugged. “Yeah, but you have a knack for it. I never even volunteered to help. I don’t know what scheme Marybeth’s playing.”
A lame laugh filtered out. “Tell me you’re not really that dumb.”
The second those words came out, she felt ashamed of herself. What right did she have to speak to him like that? She twisted around to return to the café as fast as she could.
A hand shot out and grabbed hers, then spun her around. “You can’t just walk away from me.”
“Well, I just did. You’ll be late for work.”
He took a step closer. “Are you going to help me decorate or not?”
Yanking her hand out of his as politely as possible, because she couldn’t take how wonderful it felt for him to hold her hand, she nodded once. “I said I would.”
“Don’t look so happy about it.”
“Why do you even want my help? If you’re trying to make Marybeth jealous, I’d be the last person to accomplish that goal with. I’m nothing compared to her.”
His face turned hard, his lips curling into the most disgusted look she’d ever seen from him. Exactly what she thought. He agreed. Why else would he look so disgusted?
“You honestly believe that?”
With a helpless shrug, she averted her eyes. “It’s not like her or Cynth—” Her eyes darted to his. The look of disgust was gone, replaced with stoic indifference. “Just let me know when and I’ll be there to help.”
She turned around before more idiotic words came out of her mouth and hurried back to the café. The cold weather was starting to freeze her to the bone. While she could handle the cold, she had darted out of the café without grabbing her jacket before he could drive away. Or did she feel frozen to the bone from the terrible interaction with Officer Crowl? Why did she always act like an idiot around him?
Her hand grasped the cold handle of the diner door and pulled it open. Before she could step into the warmth, a hand touched her shoulder. She knew without looking who it would be. She turned slightly, almost resting against the open door. His hand fell to his side.
“You followed me outside for a reason. Why is that?”
She almost forgot why. Now, she wished she never had the crazy impulse. But her conscience wouldn’t let it go.
“I’m sorry.”
Confusion muddled his features. “For what?”
“For being so rude earlier.”
He rubbed his jaw, then looked away. “Forget about Marybeth. Forget about everything that just happened.”
She took a step toward the warmth of the diner, wanting to be finished with the conversation already. “Not about that. Although I am sorry if I said anything to offend you.”
His eyes locked with hers. “You didn’t. But I’m confused as hell. Why are you sorry?”
She let out a huge breath. “For saying I couldn’t make your mother a necklace. I can make one.”
“I don’t want to put more on your plate, Theresa. You already have some orders to take care of, not to mention working at the diner. Now you’re helping with the decorations...” A terrified panic entered his eyes. “You are going to help me, right?”
“I said I would.”
His lips pressed into a thin line, yet nothing came out.
“What kind of necklace would you like?”
He sighed, then relaxed his features. “Her favorite color is yellow. I’m sure whatever you come up with will be beautiful.” He took a step closer to her. “I have no doubt about that.”
“Well, then. That’s settled. Have a good day.”
He leaned in, a breath away. “Are things really settled between us?”
“Of course. You should get to work.”
“I should.” His soft lips landed on hers, exerting a small amount of pressure, then just as quickly, he backed away.
He took three steps toward his vehicle before she yelled, “What was that?”
Twisting to look at her, he looked at her deadpan, but with a tiny twinkle in his eyes. “Mistletoe.” He continued to walk away.
She turned and stepped inside, letting the door close behind her. Looking up, she eyed the mistletoe hanging. Odd. He was blaming the mistletoe again. But this time they hadn’t been standing directly underneath it. They were outside. The mistletoe hung inside. Did it still count if you weren’t standing directly underneath it?
She didn’t understand him at all. What was going on? What was he doing to her?
Her fingers touched her lips.
Did it matter what he was doing? He kissed her on the lips.
She dropped her fingers and shook her head at the silly notions running through her mind. It didn’t mean anything. He would never like her like that. Never in a million years.