I try not to stare at the interior of the jet, but it’s hard. Really hard.

Mia rushes past me and plops onto one of the cream-colored leather seats, like being surrounded by this kind of opulence is no big deal.

Which, to her, I have to remind myself, isn’t.

“Who’s ready for the best snowboarding trip ever?” Benjamin asks from behind me.

“Me! Me!” Mia yelps.

Benjamin touches my waist as he goes by, and our eyes connect. A shiver runs down into my toes. This has been happening a lot lately. One touch or look from him, and I lose all sense of who I am or what I’m doing.

“Buckle up,” Benjamin tells Mia. He bends down to help her with her seat belt, and I take the opportunity to further check out the private jet.

Benjamin hasn’t gone on any long trips since I’ve met him, but I know that he uses this jet for when he does. It has twelve seats in it, plus a long couch. There’s a minibar, a fridge, and a flat screen mounted at the front. The stewardess has already taken our bags and put them away.

The stewardess.

That’s another thought I can’t wrap my head around. Do she and the pilot work for Benjamin full time? Or does he hire whoever is available when he needs to make a trip?

This whole world is so foreign to me, but I’m not going to ask those kinds of questions. We’ll only be at the lodge for a couple nights, and are coming back on Christmas Eve, so I want to make the best of it.

“Have a seat,” Benjamin says, patting the chair next to him.

Smiling, I do as I’m bidden, which isn’t hard.

Mia already has her books out, and is turning pages and quietly reading out loud. Benjamin loops an arm over the back of my chair, and we share a quick look.

It’s the closest he’s ever come to touching me around Mia, and I’m trying not to read into it. I’m sure he hasn’t said anything to her about the two of us—why would he? I’m the nanny. In her eyes, that’s how it should be right now.

I lean past Benjamin and catch a peek at her. Her little legs are swinging over the side of her seat and she’s switching up her voice for the different characters. A rush of love fills my chest.

Mia is an amazing child. Honestly, at times I don’t know who I’m becoming more attached to—her, or her father.

The jet takes off within a few minutes, and once Mia grows tired of her books, we spend the duration of the two-and-a-half-hour flight watching a movie and playing games like I spy.

When the stewardess announces that we’ll be landing soon, I take a look out the window and can hardly believe my eyes. I knew we were flying somewhere with snow, but now that I’m here, it’s crazy. It’s like we’ve entered another world.

Just like with boarding the plane, exiting it is super fast and simple. There are no other passengers to wait for, no baggage to pick up in the airport, and we’re off in no time at all, descending the steps into what—compared to San Bravado—feels like freezing air.

I shrink inside of my parka and hurry to the waiting car. In between this and the jet, I’m starting to feel like royalty.

In the back of the car, Mia buckles herself into the booster seat that’s between me and Benjamin. “Look at the snow.” She points at the mountains in the distance.

“It’s beautiful.”

Benjamin settles in on Mia’s other side, and we’re off. The car takes us right through Aspen’s downtown, along cute, tree-lined streets with brownstone and brick buildings.

It’s the lodge that really takes the cake, though. It’s set at the base of the mountains, with more windows than I can count. The car drops us off at the front door, and before I can go to grab my own suitcase, someone else is taking care of it, and Benjamin is taking my hand.

“Come on.” He smiles.

I grin back at him, allowing myself to be guided into a lavish lobby. While Benjamin checks in, Mia and I inspect the taxidermy bear by the fireplace and dare each other to stand close to it.

“It’s creepy.” Mia wraps her arms around herself and shivers.

“Don’t worry. It won’t eat you.” I creep closer to her. “But I might.”

I close the distance between us with a leap, wrapping my arms around her and sweeping her off the floor. Mia shrieks in pleasure, and I bury my face in her armpit, pretending to munch on her.

“You’re a yummy snack,” I tell her.

Over her head, I catch Benjamin watching us. At some point, he finished checking in and wandered over. There’s a look in his eyes that I can’t peg. Longing? Wistful happiness?

A moment later and it’s gone.

“Let’s go see our rooms,” he says, springing into action and leading the way to the elevators.

The suite he’s rented for us doesn’t disappoint. It’s more like an apartment than anything else. With a foyer, a living room, a little kitchen nook, and two bedrooms, it has to have close to twice the square footage of Amy’s apartment. Making a mental note to send her a video tour of the place later, I follow Mia into the bigger bedroom, where she’s already jumping on the bed.

“Whose bed is this?” she asks, hair flying around her head to create a halo. “It’s mine, right?”

Benjamin comes in from talking to the porter who’s delivered our bags. “You get the other one. The bed is lower in there.”

“Aww.” She stops jumping and gasps. “Oh, no! There are only two beds.”

I give Benjamin a sidelong glance as he crosses his arms, addressing Mia.

“I’ll be fine on the couch, pumpkin.”

When Mia’s not looking, he winks my way. My pulse quickens.

“So, what now?” Benjamin asks. “Are we going to stay in here and watch TV all afternoon or are we going to go snowboarding?”

“Snowboarding!” Mia and I both cry out at the same time.

We get changed for the adventure, with me pulling on the outerwear Benjamin bought me just for the occasion. Bundled up, we head downstairs, where we’re given a ride to the equipment shack up the mountain a bit.

The first thing I learn about snowboarding is that it’s even harder than it looks. At least for me, anyway. I’m pretty fit, and I’ve done a number of sports in my life, from swimming to soccer. One thing I’ve never been great at, though, is balance.

“Bend your knees,” Mia instructs.

We’re at the beginner’s slope, and I’ve already eaten snow twice. The average age in this spot is much closer to Mia’s than mine, but I don’t care. I’m having a blast with the two people I want to be around most.

“Careful.” Benjamin laughs and takes hold of my elbow.

“Thanks.” I look up at him, and even though we’re both wearing sunglasses, there’s something strong about the connection.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Mia watching us, a smile on her face…a knowing smile?

No, I tell myself. She’s too little to understand what might be happening between Benjamin and me. Although, she has talked about her mother before, and about how she’d like a “second mommy” one day.

Does that mean she sees me as a candidate for that role?

Scooting away from Benjamin—as much as my board lets me—I push those thoughts away. I’m Mia’s nanny. Benjamin’s…whatever it is we are. It’s too dangerous for me to think other ways.

And yet, here we are, on a trip together. A trip in which it really doesn’t feel like I’m the nanny. It’s more like I’ve come along as a girlfriend.

Again, I know reading between the lines only leads to trouble. Once you start doing that, disappointments and misunderstandings are right around the corner.

For now, I need to focus on this moment. The sun is shining and the snow is pristine. I have a great, gorgeous man and his adorable little girl by my side. I need to enjoy life as it comes at me.