SEVENTEEN
Sheriff Ezekiel Mayes had surveyed the destruction of the Nauti Buoy after she limped into dock. His deputies were going through the interior as Kelly, Rowdy, Dawg, and Natches sat inside the small employees’ room of the marina.
Ray and Maria stood at the side of the room as Sheriff Mayes took their statements. Kelly could see the knowledge in the sheriff’s eyes as he questioned her, his gaze flickering to the Mackay cousins, a hint of disapproval lighting the golden brown depths of his eyes.
“You didn’t see anything at all?” His gaze went over the four of them once again. “Hard to believe three tough ex-Marines would let a stalker get the jump on them, especially considering those same Marines were well aware of the danger of the situation.”
Kelly pressed her lips together as she clenched her hands in her lap. She had to grit her teeth to keep from defending the men. To keep from revealing the fact that she knew Rowdy had planned this. She knew he had, and it infuriated her.
“Come on, Zeke, you know better than that,” Rowdy bit out. “Kelly needed some time out. I thought the cove would be safe—”
“I’m not a fool, Rowdy,” the sheriff snapped. “I’m not buying that shit and neither is your daddy.” He nodded to where Ray was staring back at his son with a heavy scowl.
“I’m old enough that my daddy’s opinion either way doesn’t sway me, Zeke,” Rowdy snapped back. “Now why don’t you let me take Kelly home to rest—”
“Kelly, letting these three mix you up in some crazy scheme to catch this stalker is a bad idea.” The sheriff hunched down in front of her chair. “Let me handle this. We’ll catch him.”
“You haven’t yet,” she whispered, shaking her head as anger and fear collided inside her.
Damn them all. She felt like a bone in the middle of a pack of wild dogs.
Compassion filled the sheriff’s eyes. “I’m not a vigilante, sweetheart. When he’s caught, I need the law on my side, not his. Kelly, if these boys suspect someone, I need to know.”
“If I suspected anyone, you’d know it, Zeke.” Rowdy’s voice was hard, cold. “Now leave her the hell alone.”
“God, stop snapping around me.” Kelly jerked to her feet, causing the sheriff to straighten and stare down at her with a heavy scowl. “All of you. I’ve had enough for tonight. I didn’t see anyone. I didn’t hear anything. We were on the lake to get the hell away from that bastard. That was all.”
She pushed her fingers through her hair, aware of the strained silence filling the room. She glanced over at her mother, and saw knowledge there. They knew why she was at the lake with the three cousins. She and Ray knew, and though Kelly felt no embarrassment, no shame at the knowledge, what she did feel was a sudden certainty that this wasn’t a relationship she could endure.
Not because of the knowledge. Not because of morality. Because she didn’t love them. She loved Rowdy, and the discontent, the subtle anger building inside her for days now over his expectations were clawing at her heart. The attack had only reinforced it. She was tired of being controlled. Period. First by a damned stalker and then by her need to please Rowdy.
“I’m ready to go home.” She shook her head before lifting her chin and staring around the room. “Now. I need to sleep and I need to think.”
“You can go home.” Sheriff Mayes nodded. “But I may need to ask you some more questions tomorrow.”
“Fine. Whatever.”
“Just a minute and I’ll drive you—” Rowdy began.
“I’ll ride with Mom and Ray,” she told him, ignoring the surprise that swept across his face. “I need to think, Rowdy. We can talk later.”
“Kelly.” He caught her arm as she moved to step past him. “We’ll be right behind you.”
We?
She moved her gaze over his cousins. She had been in their arms, felt their hunger and their lust, and despite the pleasure, she could feel her anger building. They were like little boys desperate to keep their newest toy close to them.
She inhaled deeply. “Whatever you want to do, Rowdy.”
She pulled her arm from his grip before moving to Ray and her mother.
“Sure?” Ray asked her quietly.
“I just want to go home,” she muttered. “Now.”
Rowdy, Natches, and Dawg moved from the store with them. She was aware of how they placed themselves around her, protectively, shielding her. She felt smothered instead as she moved into the backseat of her stepfather’s Laredo.
Within minutes they were heading to the house, a fucking convoy of vehicles. Dawg and Natches were in front of the Laredo with Rowdy bringing up the rear.
“Kelly—” Her mother began softly.
“Not now, Mom.” She huddled into the backseat, wishing she could make sense of the emotions clouding her heart, her mind. Trying to make sense of her anger.
Rowdy was taking her over. Forceful. Dominant. He was so certain he knew what she needed, but Kelly had seen what she needed, and it wasn’t what he was offering.
It was the reason she couldn’t make the choice. Why she fought Rowdy every time he pushed for her to make a conscious decision about her needs. It was why she had wanted to be seduced, because she knew that unless the decision was taken out of her hands, she couldn’t make it.
And that drove home the sharp edge of knowledge that this wasn’t something she could do. She couldn’t let this happen, because if she did, it would shadow her relationship with Rowdy forever. It would be better to lose him now than to have to share him later. If any more of her soul became invested in this, then she didn’t know how she would bear letting go of every dream she had ever had. Hell, she didn’t know how she was going to do it now.
Maybe she just wasn’t naughty enough for the man she loved, or his cousins.
He was a fool. Rowdy followed the Laredo, his thoughts as confused as the emotions he had glimpsed raging in Kelly’s eyes. He ached, and it wasn’t because of the attack. That just pissed him off. No, he ached because the attack had been a diversion he had begun praying for just before it happened. A way to pull Kelly from Dawg’s arms, make certain the fingers filling her tight ass were gone, the touch to her clit no one’s but his own.
Jealousy had begun to mar the pleasure even before the sounds of gunshots and the whiz of bullets tearing through the cabin had sent them all crashing to the floor.
What the hell was he supposed to do now? Dawg and Natches had protected her for the past four years from the bastards desperate to get into her pants. His two cousins hadn’t touched her because of the understanding of the relationship that would evolve later. Even though Rowdy knew they had hungered for her almost as desperately as he had.
Had he not been so intent on running those last four years, of being certain what he wanted, the attack wouldn’t have happened. He would have been there to protect her, to keep that bastard from touching her. But what would have happened to the relationship he had always envisioned?
He realized now that the shift in his desires had begun before he returned home. Hell, before he took that last tour in the Marines. He hadn’t wanted to face it, and now it was slamming into his face with the force of a sledgehammer.
He was risking everything he had come home for and he hadn’t even realized it. His own arrogance, his own certainty that he hadn’t, that he couldn’t change. That the sexual pleasures that had always been such a part of his life would remain the same.
Kelly was changing the rules. She was changing him.
Rowdy rubbed at his neck wearily, blowing out a frustrated breath as he turned into the driveway of his father’s home, his eyes scanning the well-lit exterior. Dawg and Natches had pulled to the sides of the driveway, keeping Ray’s Laredo between their vehicles with Rowdy bringing up the rear.
Turning off the ignition, Rowdy opened the door and stepped from his pickup as Ray, Maria, and Kelly slowly stepped from the Laredo.
With a flick of his fingers he sent Natches ahead of them to check out the house before Kelly entered. His eyes continued to scan the exterior, the hairs on the back of his neck tingling as he moved closer to Kelly. He could feel the bastard out there, watching them.
She leaned into him as his arm went around her. Damn, she was exhausted, terrified. What the hell was he going to do about her? As the warmth of her swept through his body, the possessiveness growing inside him seemed to expand, strengthen.
Leading her toward the house, he kept his senses on alert as Natches slipped in ahead of them, with Dawg following close behind.
“Rowdy, we need to talk,” Kelly whispered as they stepped up to the porch.
“We will, baby.” He bent his head, kissing the top of her head before leading her into the hallway, his eyes finding Dawg as he made his way along the top of the stairs. Natches had moved into the kitchen, each man checking the rooms thoroughly as Rowdy led Kelly, and their parents, into the darkened living room.
“Leave the lights off for now, Dad,” he advised his father as he moved Kelly to the wide chair at the side of the room. “There were signs of a watcher on the hill overlooking the house on this side the other night. The lights will pick up shadows with the thin curtains in here.”
“Shit,” his father muttered, but the lights stayed out. “I need a drink.”
As Ray took care of drinks for himself, Maria, and Kelly, Rowdy went through the house again, checking windows, assuring himself it was safe for the few hours of night left. Dawg was currently set up in Kelly’s room, armed with a night vision telescope as he watched the hill across the clearing, while Natches had slipped outside to take watch.
Returning downstairs, he escorted Kelly to his own bedroom. She was quiet, withdrawn, and he’d be damned if he knew what to say to her.
“Grab one of my shirts and go on to bed, darling.” He couldn’t touch her, if he did, he was guaranteed to completely humiliate himself. How could one man be as big a fool as he was? he wondered. And now, how did he fix it?
She was moving for his closet even as he spoke, and pulling free one of his more comfortable T-shirts. He had to give her credit for knowing what she wanted.
As he stood silently watching her, she stripped down to bare skin, then drew the shirt over her head and smoothed it down past her thighs. His clothes hung on her, but they carried her scent for weeks after she wore them. The soft, subtle hint of woman that only he could smell.
“You go ahead and do whatever you have to do,” she told him, her voice cool as she flipped the blankets back on his bed and crawled in. “I’m too tired to deal with it tonight.”
“Go to sleep, baby.” He came close enough to bend, to let his lips caress the still kiss-swollen curves of hers as she stared up at him. “I’ll take care of you, Kelly.”
“Yes, you will,” she sighed heavily, her gray eyes shadowed. “And tomorrow, I’ll take care of you.”
He didn’t think she meant sexually.
“Kelly—”
“Not tonight, Rowdy.” She shook her head firmly. “Tomorrow. I’m just too tired to talk tonight.”
He could see the adrenaline crashing through her, wiping her out. She was still in shock, fighting the reality of the attack. She would dream later, he knew. And the nightmares could be ugly. He promised himself he’d be back by then, that he would hold her through them, ease her.
“Tomorrow.” He smoothed her hair back from her face as she settled into the bed. “I’m going downstairs for a while, baby. I’ll leave the door open and I won’t be long—”
“I’ll be okay, Rowdy,” she assured him, a thread of mockery filling her voice. “Go. Just let me sleep.”
Rowdy paced the house. Nervous tension was a bitch, and suffering from it wasn’t something he normally did. But damn if he wasn’t just about to cut his own throat just to ease the thoughts tormenting him.
What the hell had he done?
When he first came downstairs on the Nauti Buoy, the sight of Kelly standing next to Dawg had sent his cock to full erection and the blood racing through his veins. Just as it had earlier when his cousin had moved behind her, his lips moving over her buttocks, spreading them, caressing her.
It had been hot as hell, feeling her pleasure as her hot little mouth surrounded the sensitive crest of his cock. Holding back had been iffy. His balls had drawn up in tortuous need, desperate to explode as the pleasure of it had seared his nerve endings.
He had ignored that unfamiliar tension that began to hover at the back of his mind. Fought with it. Then later, as his lips suckled at her tight nipple his eyes had watched as Natches pleasured the other, and he heard the words Dawg whispered to her. How snug she was, how hot, and the lust that filled his cousin’s voice had slapped at Rowdy.
Jealousy. Possessiveness. He wasn’t used to those emotions, but now they raged inside him until his fists were clenched and violence simmered just beneath the surface. He prayed for the chance to get his hands on the little son of a bitch stalking Kelly. To take out the fury and aggression rising inside him on someone who deserved it. Neither Dawg nor Natches deserved it, but it was building, growing inside him until Rowdy wasn’t certain he could contain it.
Stalking back to the living room, he moved to the small bar Ray kept at the side of the room and poured a measure of whiskey into one of the tumblers sitting ready. The liquid burned going down, but did nothing to calm the beast raging inside him.
“Liquor doesn’t help, boy.”
He turned, his hand tightening on the butt of the pistol he carried before recognizing his father.
Ray stood just inside the doorway, dressed in a pair of dark cotton pajama bottoms and a faded T-shirt. His expression was sober, lined with worry, and his eyes gleamed with knowledge.
“We’ll catch him.” Rowdy shrugged. “He’s losing focus—”
“I wasn’t talking about her stalker.” He moved farther into the room. “I was talking about what happened on that boat before he attacked.”
Rowdy brought the glass to his lips and threw back the rest of the whisky before grimacing tightly. Damn, he didn’t need this conversation with his father.
“Let it go, Dad.”
“Doesn’t set well, does it, Son?” Ray moved closer to the bar, lifting one of the clean tumblers and pouring his own drink. “It starts eating at your gut first thing, tearing at you, making you wonder where your mind was.”
Rowdy narrowed his eyes on his father, hearing the knowledge in his voice, the assurance that only came from experience.
“They didn’t take her,” he muttered, wondering why the hell he was bothering to explain this to his father of all people.
“Might not have, but something happened. Something strong enough to make you panic, to keep you awake. To tear your guts up with guilt.”
Son of a bitch.
“She was shot at, Dad, that’s enough to shake any man’s insides.”
Ray sipped at his drink, staring at him over the rim of the glass. Rowdy couldn’t hide from the knowledge, no matter how much he suddenly wanted to.
“I know what’s going on, Son,” he finally sighed heavily. “You think you and those two hardheaded cousins of yours are the only men in this family to think they know what they want in a woman? And in her pleasure?” Ray frowned heavily, his eyes darkening. “You’re not. I’ve tried to warn you since I first caught wind of what was going on, and you’ve never wanted to listen.”
Rowdy watched his father curiously then. Through the years, there had been whispers that Ray Mackay and his best friend had been up to some sexual little games, but nothing concrete and nothing his dad had ever confirmed.
Ray grunted mockingly. “Your generation thinks they know everything. You don’t. Mine knew what a reputation was, and we knew what should be kept private and what should be flaunted. Women like Calista James were steered clear of except for a certain few. We knew our actions would always backfire on us, if not at the time, then later, on our wives, our children. I thought I taught you that, but maybe I failed there too.”
Ray shook his head as he nodded to the chairs Maria and Kelly had sat in earlier. “Come over here, Rowdy. Let’s talk.”
“What’s there to talk about?”
“Saving face,” his father sighed. “Those two cousins of yours have waited nearly as long as you have for Kelly. They don’t love her like you do, but when you yank something like that out of a man’s hands, he’s bound to get pissed. And you don’t want that kind of pissed from men you’ve been as close to as brothers.”
Ray leaned forward in his chair, staring back at Rowdy intently. Damn, that look had the ability to send him right back to his teenage years and the memory of his father’s chastisements.
He wasn’t a teenager anymore, but at the moment he felt as uncertain as one.
Rowdy turned his gaze to his drink, wondering what the hell he was supposed to say. He’d already figured out the fact that he was making a hell of a mistake—he didn’t need his father to point that out to him.
“It’s tough, being as close to men as you are to Dawg and Natches,” Ray sighed. “You three are closer than brothers, you always have been.” He shook his head, staring down at the glass in his hand as he grimaced painfully. “I had a friend like that once, Rowdy.” He lifted his eyes then. “A damned good friend.”
Rowdy stared back at him, knowing what was coming. Knowing he didn’t want to hear it.
“It was before your mother.” Ray cleared his throat. “And there was this woman. One that made the blood boil in my veins, made me want forever. But I was dumb. Brick dumb. I thought I’d always be the man I was then. That what I wanted sexually would always be a part of my life. And I shared that woman. Because I thought that pleasure was the greatest gift I could give her…”
He tossed back the rest of his drink before meeting Rowdy’s eyes once again.
“Kelly should have been your sister, Rowdy. If I hadn’t been so stupid, I wouldn’t have lost Maria all those years ago. She chose the lover willing to love just her, rather than his own selfishness. Willing to give her all of himself, without the childish need to have it all his own way.”
Rowdy’s jaw bunched tightly.
“Dad, let it go.” Rowdy shook his head sharply.
“You’re figuring it out, I can see that in your eyes. The same way I thought I was figuring it out. But I let that bond I thought I had with my buddy get in the way. I was torn between the loss of friendship, and my own wants. And I thought the woman would be there either way. It wasn’t the friend I lost, Rowdy. It was the woman. And trust me, when it comes right down to it, Kelly is no different than her mother.”
Rowdy breathed in deeply. Damn, he hadn’t wanted to hear this. He lifted the whisky before tipping more of the liquor into his glass.
His father was silent then, finishing his drink as Rowdy sipped from his.
“I love her,” Rowdy finally breathed out roughly. “I didn’t expect this though.”
“Love changes us, Son.” Ray rose to his feet, crossing the room slowly to set his empty glass on the bar. “Don’t make the same mistake I did, Rowdy. Once it’s over that first time, once you’ve let another man claim what’s yours and yours alone, you lose a part of your soul. Getting it back is hell. A hell I hope you never know.”
Rowdy stared back at his father silently, finally hearing what the other man had always tried to teach him. What was fair, what he wanted alone, wasn’t all that mattered. He had begun learning it in the Marines, but it was slapping him upside the head now.
“James Salyers was still a friend when he died, Rowdy. And I grew up and learned some damned hard lessons. Maria gave me a second chance, but that chance came at a cost. A very high cost. The daughter that should have been mine came from another man, and the son I love more than life is about to fuck up not just his own life, but that girl’s as well. Watching it and knowing I can’t stop it is hell. Remember that while you struggle between what you love and what you want.”
As Rowdy watched his father leave the room, a heavy sigh slipped past his lips. Maria’s objections to his relationship made more sense now. He shook his head, realizing how well his father, James Salyers, and Maria had kept that secret. Reputations. Theirs was intact, but his wasn’t. And now, he was risking Kelly’s as well.
Kelly was awake when he returned to the bedroom a little after midnight. Sleep wasn’t coming, no matter how hard she sought it. Each time she closed her eyes she saw…herself…surrounded by the Mackay cousins, their hands touching her as pleasure whipped around her. But it wasn’t pleasure she felt in the memory. She felt the dark swirl of shame.
The same emotions she had felt each time she swore she wasn’t waiting one day longer on Rowdy and she was going to find someone to love her. To stick around and be with her. Each time she had tried, each time she had attempted to allow another man to touch her, shame had eaten her alive for days later.
The door closed behind him, the click of the lock causing her to open her eyes, to stare through the darkness as his shadow moved toward the bed.
God, she loved him. If she could give him his every desire then she would do it in a second, but some things she knew she couldn’t do. Dawg and Natches she couldn’t do. And she had no idea how to tell him. No idea how to broach what she knew could destroy the relationship she had dreamed of.
“Everything’s quiet,” he said softly as he pulled his shirt from his body.
The room was dark, too dark to make out his expression, but she could hear his voice, see the gleam of his eyes.
“I couldn’t sleep.” She could feel the tension between them.
Rowdy sat at the edge of the bed, pausing before he sighed tiredly and bent to take off his sneakers.
“Rowdy?” She whispered his name, uncertain what to say, what to do as he rose to his feet and shucked off his jeans.
He was naked. As he turned to her she glimpsed the heavy, engorged length of his erection a second before she was suddenly jerked to him.
“Rowdy?” She gasped his name as his lips covered hers, stealing her breath, her startled cry.
And from there, her strength. His hands were hard, dominant as he tore the shirt from her body, tossing it carelessly to the floor before his lips took hers again. Her muted cries built in her head as he bore her to the bed, spreading her thighs, sinking into her.
There were no preliminaries. No foreplay. One moment she was empty, the next she was full, her pussy stretched to its limits as he groaned into her mouth.
She fought to breathe, and she could feel his struggle as well. The harsh sounds that tore from his throat were almost animalistic in their hunger, their intensity. His lips held back both their cries as he began to move, hard, furious strokes inside, sending her nerve endings into shock, the pleasure ripping through her with the same desperation with which his erection thrust into the slick, heated depths of her body.
Her arms wrapped about his neck, fingers pushing into his hair as one hard hand gripped her hip, holding her in place as he moved. The other arm curled beneath her as he supported himself on his elbow.
He surrounded her. He possessed her. Pleasure became a burning, consuming need as he fucked her with a hunger that swept through her soul. She could almost touch his soul. Then her eyes opened, widened, shock and ecstasy exploding through her as the orgasm overtaking her stole a part of her very spirit. Stole it and merged it with his. Melded them together as he stiffened above her, his cock swelling then pulsing as his release jetted inside her. Deep, almost violent spurts of his seed heated her, triggering another, deeper orgasm, sending stars to explode around her as she screamed soundlessly into his kiss.
“Mine!” The hard, throaty growl that left his throat had to have been her imagination. “Mine.”
Possessive. Consuming. His.