I sat across from Tyler in our Taco Hut. It was a place that held so many memories. It was where he first asked me out, and it ended up being where we had most of our dates. We’d get the taco platter and split it, then max out our order of dipping sauces. It was a meal we were again eating.

I still couldn’t believe Tyler had wanted me to come out with him. When he had dropped Brody off after being at the hospital, the first question out of his mouth had been whether or not we could sit down together and talk. He had said he wanted to take me out again, which confused me even more.

Why would a man who didn’t want to work on his relationship with me want to take me out to dinner?

Granted, it was Taco Hut. It was nothing more than a kitchen, a small bar that served nothing but margaritas and Corona, and an overhang with some benches. But just like our spot behind the Hollywood sign, it held memories I’d never let go of. Memories that made me smile even to this day.

And I knew they held the same significance to Tyler.

“Your parents watching Brody?” he asked.

“Mm, they are, yes.”

I covered my mouth so he wouldn’t see me chomping on my food while talking.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to catch you mid-bite.”

“It’s fine. You’re good. I promise,” I said.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Of course you can.”

“What was it like when you first found out you were pregnant?”

My brow ticked up in confusion as I finished off my second taco.

“Um, well, I was scared for one thing. I didn’t really believe the first pregnancy test, so I took another one. And when that one came back positive as well, I knew I had a serious problem.”

“So, all of those headaches and uneaten lunches because you didn’t feel well—?”

“Yeah. All part of it.”

Tyler nodded his head as he picked up another taco.

“Did you experience any—complications?”

“You seem interested in my pregnancy.”

“I am.”

“Can I ask why?”

His eyes connected with mine before he sighed.

“It’s a part of Brody’s existence I didn’t get to experience. And it’s something you went through alone. I guess I just want to make sure you were okay through it.”

I nodded, trying to digest his words as best as I could.

“I mean, I didn’t really experience complications. I think the most nerve-wracking thing was telling my parents.”

“Did you do that alone, too?”

“No. I had told Kristi by that point. She was with me when I broke the news to them.”

“How did that go?”

“Uh, about as well as you could expect?”

“What does that mean?” he asked.

“My dad wasn’t happy. He thought you ran out on me, and I had to tell him you didn’t know. Then it was sort of a chorus coming from all fronts about how I needed to tell you. I guess I should have listened.”

I dropped my gaze to my lap and cleared my throat.

“My pregnancy was fine. I had to go to the hospital once because I passed out, but it wasn’t anything serious.”

“What happened, Ana? Were you okay?”

“I was fine. Brody was fine. Everything was fine. I was just a little anemic throughout my pregnancy. It’s common. Just something they noted on my chart before putting me on an iron supplement. I wasn’t a fan of meat while I was pregnant.”

“Did you have any weird cravings?” he asked.

I giggled. “All the time.”

“What did you want the most?”

“Chocolate milk, from beginning to end. And slushies. I swear, that’s why Brody is such a hound for slushies. I practically drank both things like they were water. Chocolate milk for every meal and slushies whenever else I wanted something to drink.”

“Do you like slushies now?”

“I can’t stand them,” I said, laughing.

I calmed myself down quickly once I noticed Tyler wasn’t laughing with me.

“Sorry,” I said.

“No need. I like watching you laugh.”

“My parents were a big help, but I wouldn’t let them do much. I guess since I felt like I’d gotten myself into that situation, I needed to rely on myself to get out of it. Or at least make the best of it.”

“It seems like you’ve done just that.”

“I like to think I have. I mean, Mom babysat a lot. Though I always made sure to pay her for her time. She watched Brody while I took weekend classes in design and business at the community college up the road.”

“I’m glad they were there for you and Brody.”

“They really were. My father always wanted to interject and help money-wise, but I wouldn’t let him. He bought me that storefront, though. I was so angry with him for doing that.”

“Only you would be angry with someone for buying you your dream building,” he said, grinning.

“I paid him back every cent, plus interest, over the first two years we were in business. I didn’t want anyone else providing things for my son that were my responsibility to provide. I guess it was selfish and prideful in the end, but I felt the mess I had made was mine to shoulder.”

“Not even mine?” he asked.

I sighed as our eyes connected.

“I don’t know. Maybe. I sometimes wonder if my pride became the reason I never reached out to you. I have no one to blame but myself at this point,” I said.

“For what it’s worth, Brody is a really great kid. You've done a fabulous job.”

Tears welled in my eyes, and I looked away so I could blink them back.

“Thank you,” I said. “I appreciate that.”

“I’m sorry I never called you back the other day. You sort of called at a bad time.”

“I know. You said you had a meeting.”

“Actually, I didn’t.”

I turned my gaze to him as my brow furrowed.

“You didn’t?”

“I didn’t want to talk to anyone about it at the time, and I didn’t really know what to tell you, but you called in the middle of me talking to my Mom’s doctor. He had called to tell me we weren’t matches. I’d just assumed we would be, so I was kind of shocked and upset.”

“Oh my gosh, Tyler. I am so sorry,” I said.

“It’s fine. I mean, it’s not fine, but we’re dealing with it.”

“What’s the next step?”

“It’s essentially a waiting game. Waiting until a donor pops up. I just wanted to tell you since technically I lied.”

“It’s fine. I wasn’t owed that information, Tyler.”

The table fell silent as we both reached for another taco.

“How did things go with Brody meeting your parents?” I asked.

“Oh my gosh. Yeah, um—it went great. He and my father bonded really well. Brody is really good at math?”

I nodded as I took a bite of my taco.

“Of course you knew. It’s just—I mean my father was very impressed with how he was able to talk mathematics with him.”

“He can run some pretty insane calculations in his head. It’s still astounding to me that he likes history as much as he does, too.”

“I think he enjoys the national parks more than anything else.”

“Good. So I’m not the only one who gets that vibe,” I said, smiling.

“Nope. I noticed it, too.”

“So, how did your mother take to him?” I asked.

Tyler finished off his taco before he wiped his mouth and spoke.

“A lot of hugging. A lot of crying. A lot of doting on him and kissing. It was sort of a mixture of ‘I’m so glad to meet you’ and ‘I might not have much time with you,’ you know?”

My heart broke and tears rose to my eyes again.

“I’m so sorry. I never should’ve done what I did,” I said breathlessly.

“Ana, stop apologizing. It happened and there’s nothing we can do about it.”

“I am sorry, Tyler. I swear I thought I was doing right by everyone. I tried. I tried so hard.”

“Ana, stop. Look at me.”

He reached for my hand, his soft skin pressing against mine. I looked up to meet his eyes as a tear ran down my cheek, and he reached out to brush it away.

Such an intimate gesture from a man who I wasn’t sure still enjoyed being around me.

“Things went really well with my parents and Brody.”

“I’m glad,” I said, sniffling.

“I was hoping maybe my father and I could take him out. Maybe when Mom’s napping or something.”

“Of course. Of course you can. Just call and let me know. I’ll do whatever I can to coordinate with you guys.”

“I appreciate it, really. I think Dad wants to take him out for ice cream.”

“If you make it slushies, he’ll cling to your father and never let go,” I said.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he said, chuckling.

Our informal dinner seemed oddly romantic. His foot slid against mine underneath the table as we finished our meal. His hand kept a hold on mine as we sipped our drinks. He smiled at me every once in a while, continuing his line of questioning about my pregnancy, about Brody’s birth, about how my recuperation was.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he genuinely cared about it.

He escorted me to my car with his hand on the small of my back. I wanted to ask him what it meant. I wanted to ask him if things were okay with us. I turned to him and gazed up into his eyes as his body heat beat down upon me. He dipped his head closer. I felt his breath pulsing against my lips.

Then he moved and kissed my cheek.

“Thank you for meeting me for dinner,” Tyler said.

Disappointment settled in my gut as I nodded.

“Anytime. Just, you know, give me a call,” I said.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he said.

He squeezed my hand before he turned and headed to his car, leaving me more confused than ever. So many intimate gestures in such an informal atmosphere, and yet no mention of his love or my love, or anyone’s love really. I leaned against my car as the imprint of his lips burned my cheek. My eyes followed him all the way out to the main road, and I stood there alone until his car faded off into the distance.

I had no idea what was going on between us. Our dinner had served to give me more questions than answers. I was more confused than I had ever felt in my entire life.