2000
Ginny sat in her Sunday school classroom and stared at the blank dry erase board on the wall. Whenever her heart became heavy, she always seemed to find herself at church. They’d started locking the church years ago, but the Sunday school teachers were each given their own keys. Many times, after just sitting in the church by herself, she would wander up the stairs to her second grade classroom. She didn’t know exactly what pulled her there; maybe she found something comforting in the innocence of the young children. Even empty, the room seemed filled with their presence and sweet joy. She looked at the walls and started to smile as she saw their hand-printed names on the angel pictures they’d drawn the Sunday before Grizz died. Laney. Jonathan. Noah. Eduardo.
She looked away then and down at her left hand. She moved the wide wedding band so she could see his name. Grizz.
She knew right before the execution that Grizz had wanted to see she still had his name there. She knew it was his way of confirming she still loved him before he died. She’d wanted him to have that last consolation— and the fact that Tommy approved of her doing it told her something else. That in spite of it all, he wasn’t a lying, deceitful person. At least not anymore. He’d stood in the shadows and waited to be with her for years. It was his idea to name their son after Grizz because he knew it would mean something to her. Just like she’d asked, Tommy had taken her to see Eddie after the execution. She didn’t have the tattoo removed. What she did do was have Eddie put the finishing touches on it. A date. The date Grizz had died. It was her way of actually saying goodbye to him. She was so proud of herself for not passing out while Eddie worked on it. She remembered it burned, kind of like a bee sting. It itched for a little while after that. She absently rubbed at it now.
She took a deep breath and allowed herself to think about everything that had transpired since Grizz’s death. Not just the trauma of his execution, but all of the secrets that came with it. Then just this morning, Tommy had called to tell her Sarah Jo’s husband, Stan, was interviewing for some of the job offers he’d received from other countries. She felt like she was losing a little piece of herself with Sarah Jo moving.
But she was also starting to believe in new beginnings. She glanced out the window at the bright sunshine, the vivid Technicolor blue sky. Carter’s husband, Bill, would be back in town tomorrow, and she really didn’t have any excuse to stay there anymore. She missed her children. She missed her home.
She missed her husband.
She thought about the hours and hours of conversation she’d had with Tommy. The explanations. The real stories. She’d probably asked him the same questions twenty different ways, trying to trip him up, trying to catch him in a lie. Liars forget their lies so they eventually mess up. But every story matched. Every question was answered the same way.
Did she believe her husband? Yes, when she thought about it, she did. At least she wanted to believe him. He seemed to be forthcoming about everything.
But could she move on from here? Could she put the past behind her and start fresh with Tommy? Could she accept that he was Grizz’s son? Mimi’s half-brother? Could she live with it? Those were the real questions.
She wasn’t sure if she knew the answers. But one thing she did know—she wouldn’t be able to make a decision until she went home. Until she went back to her marriage and her house to see if she could live a life that had not been of her choosing, but one she had grown to cherish.
Did she love Tommy? Yes, she believed she did. But she was starting to doubt herself, and the only way to figure out the truth was to be with him. To see what she felt.
She had an instant thought and felt immediate shame. If she’d learned these secrets when Grizz was still alive would she have stayed with Tommy? Or would she have settled for a life that had her visiting Grizz in jail regularly up until his execution?
Anger rippled when she realized the answer. No. She wouldn’t have done that because Grizz wouldn’t have let her. She’d tried to tell him when he was in the county jail that she would’ve gladly lived that life, but he wouldn’t allow it.
Again, a decision that had been taken away from her.
Her anger provided some resolve. She would go home to see if she could work it out with Tommy. She would give him a chance. She did love him, and not just because Grizz had pushed them together, but because he really was an amazing man, husband, and father. She didn’t like the lies, but that had been a teenage Tommy. A teenager who had fallen in love with her. She would go home. She would try.
The fact that she found herself wanting to try felt like a weight had been lifted.
Her cell phone rang, interrupting her new revelation. “Hello?”
“Ginny.” It was Tommy.
She smiled when she heard his voice. It must’ve been a sign. “Tommy, I’m so glad you called. I’m at the church. I—I’m going back to Carter’s now. I’m going to get my things and come home.” She paused, but he was quiet. “I’m not saying everything is fine. I’m just saying I’d like to try.”
He didn’t say anything at first. What was wrong? This is what he wanted, wasn’t it? He’d been begging her to come home. Why wasn’t he excited that she’d made up her mind?
“I need you to come home right now.” That’s when she heard it—the undercurrent of concern in his voice. Something was wrong. “Some detectives are here. They want to talk to us.”
“Talk to us? About what?”
“Apparently, they just found a body down by the beach. It’s a woman and she’s been murdered. They say it’s Jan. They’re questioning me, Ginny. They’re making it sound like they think I could’ve had something to do with it. I think I’m being set up.”
“What? Jan, Blue’s wife? What’s going on? Oh my God, Tommy!”
“I can’t go in to it now, honey. I just need you home. Okay?”
“Do I need to call our attorney? Or maybe I should call Vanderline. Should I ask her what we should do?”
Vanderline had made quite a good life for herself. After saving her money and putting herself through law school, she had become a respected attorney. She was now a judge in New York.
But the line had already gone dead. Shakily, she laid her phone on the little table next to where she was sitting. Jan’s murder? Tommy told her Blue had recently found Jan. What had Blue done?
She felt a crushing weight on her chest now. Would they never escape the darkness associated with the gang? Without even needing to ask for details, she knew her husband was right. He was being set up. It was probably something Grizz had ordered in retaliation for what he saw as Tommy’s deception. Between the billy club revelation and Tommy being Kevin’s father, Tommy clearly had not been forgiven. By Grizz or by Blue.
That nod to Tommy at the execution hadn’t meant anything. And it didn’t even matter that Grizz was gone. He was a formidable and powerful enemy, even from the grave.
Quickly, she gathered her phone and purse. Tommy needed her. She would get answers as soon as she got home. She still wasn’t sure where she was emotionally. But she’d felt an urgency to defend him at all costs after hearing this latest news. Did that tell her anything?
She headed down the stairs and out to her car. Moments later, she was headed for home.