RAVEN
“Wait,” Masy said, glancing at me from the TV. She had a bowl of popcorn in her lap, ready for her Friday night show. “So you came home right after on Sunday out of spite, and you’re still ignoring him out of spite.”
“I’m ignoring him out of necessity.”
Since I’d gotten into a car without him five days before, we’d had two in-office meetings. I thought he’d try to get under my skirt or make innuendos. I thought he’d send an email or a note, but no. Nothing. He was a model of professionalism.
I was glad he respected my wishes, but I was also disappointed. It was hard to sit across a table from him when his cologne was such sweet citrus. My father used a citrus scented brush cleaner, and it reminded me of when he’d let me paint. The creativity of childhood. The freedom of the instability.
I wanted him to look at me, but he barely did. I wanted his eyes to peel me down to the underwear he knew I was wearing. I wanted to feel naked and exposed with him, but he’d put a wall between us and I had to admit, I did too. My desire bounced off it, back at me. By Friday I’d given myself an unsatisfying orgasm every single night.
“Are you watching Empire with me?” Masy folded her legs under her.
“I’m going to the gym. I’ll watch it on the treadmill and we can discuss.” I needed to work Roman out of my muscles. I was looking forward to beating the hell out of them until I was too exhausted to fall asleep thinking about him.
* * * *
Twenty minutes into the treadmill, I was at a full canter, really close to that state of blissful concentration that excluded everything else. Close, because I was still aroused thinking about Roman. He wouldn’t get out of my mind. He was tenacious, hanging onto my thoughts whenever I became aware of my body. The blister on my heel, the burning breaths, the sweat dripping down my neck, my nails digging into my palm.
Someone had on his lemony cologne. I could turn up my headphones and I could even close my eyes if I saw something I didn’t want to see. But I couldn’t stop breathing. I increased the incline and turned up the sound on Empire.
He’d been such a surprise. Sexy and powerful, just the way I liked my men, but what that scent brought back was the fact that he was so much fun. He joked. He played. He made me smile. I stopped trying to avoid thoughts of him and let them come. The color of his hair and his gray-green eyes that I realized were the exact color of artichokes. His smile. His spontaneity. His stupid jokes and his terribly clever ones.
I realized I was smiling and looked up at myself in the mirror.
There was the source of the cologne. Roman was running on the treadmill next to me. He made the peace sign in the mirror.
I punched the stop button and the treadmill came to an abrupt halt. I hopped off and snapped my towel off the rail.
“That’s weird, Roman. Just weird.”
He calmly stopped his treadmill. My clothes and hair stuck to me and I was breathing like a dog. No man should see me like that, but this man in particular had no choice.
“I’m a member, Raven. Since way before I met you.”
“You just stood there watching me.”
“I wasn’t standing. I was running.” He wiped his face with his towel, not that he needed to. Even sweaty, he was perfect.
“Seriously? That’s your excuse?” My voice was raised a notch.
He shrugged and smiled a little.
“Can you avoid me outside the office too, please? Or tell me when you’re next to me like a normal person?”
“I avoided you all week.”
“You suck at it.”
He looked as if he was about to answer with some kind of unacceptable wisecrack when a male voice came from my left.
“Miss?” It was a security guard.
“Yes?”
“I’m sorry, is this gentleman bothering you?”
I glanced at Roman, then back to the security guard, who was undoubtedly doing exactly the job he’d been hired to do. This forced me to ask myself whether or not I was going to talk to Roman. I thought I’d have a minute more to decide.
“No,” I said. “He’s a friend of mine. But thanks.”
“Keep it down, then.”
“We will.” I shot him a look, but he just smiled.
The guard nodded and walked back to the door. Screw this. I stormed toward the locker room, knowing he was right behind me.
Maybe I didn’t storm.
If I’d wanted Roman to go away, I’d storm off and slam the door behind me, cutting him off. But he was following me, I knew it, and I was happy about it. By the time I got to the locker rooms, I slowed down so he could catch up.
“What do you want?” I hissed, even though I wasn’t mad. I had an act to keep up.
“I want to talk to you.”
“About what?”
“How’s this week been for you, Raven?”
“Honestly?”
“Honestly.”
“You really want to know?”
“I do. I want to know if you feel like you’re being pulled toward me whenever we pass in the hall. I want to know how much effort it takes for you to not look through those office windows. How many draft emails you’ve deleted. Because, me? I’ve tried. I’ve tried to stop thinking about you. I’ve tried to stop wanting you. I fail. I’ve completely failed, and I need to know that either you’ve failed too, or I want you to tell me how you did it.”
I took a deep breath. I knew I could lie. I could say I just didn’t give enough of a crap to have to do anything. I never thought about him. Didn’t want him. Wanted nothing to do with him outside work.
“Last night,” I said, “I swore I was never going to think of you again. But there I was, lying in bed, and I thought about you. So I did the same thing I did every other night this week.” A woman came out of the locker room, and I dropped my voice. “I put my hand between my legs and fingered myself until I could hear your voice and feel your cock stretching me open. When I came, I said your name.” Our faces inched closer. “Roman.” His breath was on my lips. “Roman.”
Our lips touched and one last time, I said, “Roman.”
He stood up straight. “Not here. We’re five blocks from the office. God, I’m an idiot when I’m near you.” He pushed open the door behind me. It was a private, unisex bathroom. I fell backward into it.
The motion sensor lights buzzed on.
He snapped the lock.
“We have to talk about this,” I said.
He picked me up under my arms and sat me on the vanity.
“Let’s talk. First of all,”—he opened my legs, exposing the wet patch between them—“we go on the down low. We kept our pants on all week. We keep doing that. We know we can.”
“Second,” I said, pulling his waistband down and getting his dick out. “This is not casual. If it’s casual for you, forget it.”
He groaned when I rubbed his cock, but nodded. “Not casual.”
“Good.”
He took my waistband and pulled it down. I raised my bottom so he could slide the pants to my knees. He knocked a shoe off and unpeeled one pant leg.
“If we get caught,” he said, sliding the head over my wetness, “it’s on me. I cover for you however I see fit.”
“We can both take the—” He entered me and I arched into him. “We can both, oh…yes.”
“Yes?” He went harder when he asked, and my mind shattered into a thoughtless burst of agreement.
“Yes, yes.”
He licked his thumb and rubbed my clit in the rhythm of our thrusts. I clutched his shirt, leveraging myself against him as he held me on the vanity so I wouldn’t fall when I came. I bit back a scream and let my throat rattle with my orgasm. He came inside me a second after, leaving his handprint on the mirror.
“Say you’re mine,” he whispered in my ear. I took his face in my hands.
“I’m yours, but how long can we do this?”
“Until Siska and Welton’s contract is up. Three weeks.”
“So soon?”
“I can neither confirm nor deny our contract is being renewed. But in three weeks, we’ll have a little elbow room.”
My body was still wrapped around his on the counter of a public bathroom, but inside I was exploding with joy.
“Can you make it?” I asked, because I wasn’t sure if I could.
“Keep wearing those brown shoes and I might.”