ROMAN
If you can’t sleep, eat. If you can’t eat, sleep.
Good advice from my dad, who had learned it in the Army. Since my night with Raven had gone deep into the early morning hours, and since I always woke up hungry anyway, I figured I’d make a big breakfast.
The first thing about a meal like that is you have to time everything right. You can’t start the eggs first or they’ll get to the table cold, but you can’t scramble them right before you’re going to put them in the pan or you’re going to get behind on the pancakes. Condiments go out first so the syrup flows and the butter is soft enough to spread on toast that’s going to be hottest while you might be pulling the bacon out of the oven.
It ran like a military operation if done right, and for the same reason climbing gear needed to be packed in a certain order. Time didn’t wait for anyone.
Choreographing all the moving parts took up 75 percent of my attention, and when she came down showered and dressed in her sequined gown, it went down to 34 percent. She shouldn’t have to do the walk of shame.
“Good morning,” I said, pulling out the tray of bacon.
“Jesus, what are you making?”
“Breakfast.”
She looked over the counter where the toast was buttered and the eggs were piled and ready in the pan. She seemed more disconcerted than anything.
“You all right?”
“Yeah, I just didn’t think I was staying for all this.”
“You’re not hungry?”
“I am.”
“You don’t like eggs? Or bacon? Or pancakes?”
“I like all that.”
“You have somewhere to go?”
“Not really.” She sat on the barstool opposite me.
“So, it’s me?”
“No.”
“I can accept if it’s me, you know.”
“It’s you.”
What? I gave her hours’ worth of orgasms and told her the absolute truth of how beautiful she was. What else could I do?
“Well.” I put down my fork. “I have nothing left.”
“That’s it? Nothing?”
“I have no more charms.”
She leaned over the counter and picked up a piece of bacon, smiling.
“That sucks.” She bit the end off and chewed. “Maybe I’ll stay for breakfast anyway.”
“That’s the spirit. Get some plates, would you?”
She got up and came around to my side. Her underwear had gotten shredded the night before, and I became hyperaware that she was naked under her evening dress.
Yeah, I got hard.
“What are you looking at?” she asked as she got two dishes down.
“Your ass. Why?”
“Are you going to look at me like that at work?”
“Probably not.”
She put the plates on the counter and looked down pensively.
“This was a mistake.”
“Whoa, there—”
“I’m not blaming you, but it’s going to be even harder now. And it was already really hard.” She was as good as admitting I didn’t hold some unrequited attraction to her and she knew it. “Okay, just so you know, yes. I thought you were hot the entire time. From the first minute. But I have a history, and I don’t want you to think I’m a slut or something but you might. And if you do, it says more about you than it does about me.”
I turned the heat off and scraped eggs onto the plates. “Go on, slut.”
She pinched me. It was cute. She was cute. Everything about her was fun.
“Seriously,” I said. “Go on.”
“I had a thing with my last boss, and it was nothing. Less than nothing and it was fine. But I felt weird at the office and I felt like everyone was talking about me. I don’t want that again. I just want this job to be normal, and I don’t want to lose it over this.”
“So, state explicitly. Do you want to continue with this thing we started? Or not?”
Her mouth tightened and she took a deep breath through her nose before speaking.
“What do you want?”
“Me?” I picked up the plates. I wanted her, but I didn’t know what to do about it. “I want to eat breakfast and fuck you again.”
“That’s not an answer.”
“It’s the only one I have. Come on. It’s Saturday. We’re not in the office. Let’s just have the weekend to do whatever we want and we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. Or not. But I’m hungry.”
I went to the table and put the food down. She tapped her fingers on the counter a few times and then sat in the chair I held out for her.
“You’re a little too convincing,” she said.
“I’m a lawyer. It’s what I do.”
She stacked pancake and egg together on her fork, eating it all in a bite.
“You know what’s funny? I’m sitting here eating breakfast and I have no idea where I am.”
“San Jose.” I opened the curtain. “I know it doesn’t look it from here.”
“Wow, you found a quiet block. Which park is that?”
“Rose Garden.”
“Is that the one with the big chess set?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh!” She wiggled in her seat while stabbing pancakes and eggs.
“You play?”
“Let’s go before the kids take it over. What time is it? What time do they put the pieces out?”
Her voice dropped at the last word when she looked at herself in her evening gown.
“Teagan has things here. Eat up and let’s go before the chess club descends.”