Hope
The shrill of her cell phone woke Hope up at four o’clock in the morning. The repeated pattern occurred twice before She jolted up in bed, fumbling to pick up the phone from the nightstand. “Chad? Chad, is it you?” She desperately held the phone to her ear. It had been seven weeks since she had talked to him, since she’d said good bye. Norfolk was reeling from the loss of six men in the last week, all of which were part of Chad’s battalion. The news rattled Hope, as well as all the spouses. Special arrangements and memorials were being planned for the men that were lost. The weight of loss lingered in the air, throughout the whole community.
“Hi, baby,” the familiar voice finally transmitted through the line. Hope knew instantly that Chad was not himself.
“Oh Chad, how are you? You sound terrible. Tell me you’re okay,” Hope begged, as she sat on the edge of the bed. At forty weeks pregnant, moving wasn’t easy.
“Honey, I’m okay. I’m sure you’ve heard by now, a mission gone wrong. It’s just…” Chad paused.
“Yes, the base has been so chaotic. It’s so sad. I am so sorry, Chad. I am so, so sorry. Can I do anything? The Family Readiness Program is organizing a memorial. What can I do? What can I send?”
“No, honey. Nothing. We are taken care of; please, don’t worry. We are rotating the units on north base to help decompress. We will be okay. Tell me, how are you doing? The baby? Isabella? Has Harper come yet?” he asked, and she knew he was searching for a difference in subject matter, even though he would’ve been notified if their baby was born.
“Baby is still staying put. I’m as round as an elephant.” Hope smiled as she heard Chad chuckle at her description. “Isabella started preschool, and she is doing great. She has made so many friends. But guess who came with Harper?” Hope scooted herself back into the bed, pulling the covers over her legs, while leaning on the headboard.
“Did your dad come? He’s supposed to be there, right?” Chad’s voice had softened; apparently the subject matter eased his tension. At least, that’s what she hoped.
“No, unfortunately he won’t be able to make it in time. His conference pulled him in for an emergency stand-in, but Harper brought Mrs. Lulu. She has been amazing, and Isabella is eating up all the attention,” Hope exclaimed. She hoped that the little tidbits of their life would bring joy to him. He sounded discouraged, and defeated, and not the Chad that she knew.
“Well, little Peanut won’t be the only child for much longer. Let her have her fun. How are you doing? Any signs of labor? Will you be pregnant forever?” Chad teased, and when Hope heard the small smile in his voice, her heart was alleviated.
“Doc says I’m only fifty-percent effaced, and one centimeter, so I’m holding steady. Do you know if I can send Red Cross to you yet?” she asked hopefully.
“I’m pretty sure it would get through. The command knows I’m waiting. I may not be able to respond right away if I’m at south base. I promise I will get in touch as soon as I can. But, baby?” Hope heard Chad pause.
“Yes, hon?” Hope traced her fingers across the sheets of the bed.
“I love you.” Chad’s voice cracked.
Hope strained to hear if he was crying; her heart was breaking for him. She knew the pressure to lead and protect was strong, and his heart for his men and women was equally as strong. She couldn’t imagine what was going through his mind after this past week.
“I love you too. More than you’ll ever know,” Hope assured, and wished she could hold him.
There was a brief length of silence between them, and it was okay. Silence between him and her always brought comfort; they just needed to be together, even if it was over the phone. Hope overheard Chad talking to someone while on the phone, and knew their time was coming to a rapid end, and she was right.
“Baby? I have to go. I will call you again soon, okay? Give Peanut a kiss for me, and tell Harper and Mrs. Lulu hello. Maybe a baby next time?” His voice sounded optimistic, and that was all that Hope could wish for.
“I hope there’s a baby next time! I love you, Chad. Stay safe.” Hope ended the conversation, as she knew Chad was being pulled away.
“I love you, Hope,” Chad said before he hung up.
Hope was now wide awake, and there was no going back to sleep after that. She slid off the bed and made her way quietly into the kitchen. She pulled out the pour over coffee brewer, knowing Mrs. Lulu would only drink her coffee that way. She shuffled about the kitchen to make herself some decaf and toast.
Hope carried her plate and mug over to the kitchen table, where she had left her laptop the night before. It didn’t take long for Hope to be immersed in her writing. It was her escape from the stress of having Chad gone. She continued to work on her fictional take on her own love story, and she hoped Chad would enjoy it when he returned. She wrote for several hours, sipping her decaf coffee and munching on fruit and toast while the rest of the house slept.
The sun rose behind her, the light streaming through the window, trickling onto her screen. It was a sign for her to get up and move around a bit, or she would be stiff. Hope reached back to the table and chair and hoisted herself up to start a new batch of caffeinated coffee for the crew that was about to stir awake.
She was right, it wasn’t long until she heard the footfalls of her sister making her way to the kitchen. Hope turned to greet the overly sleepy lady walking in. “Morning, Harper.” She waved toward the lumbering figure.
“Good lord, woman, how early were you up?” Harper asked as she leaned against the counter, watching the coffee trickle into the holder below it.
“Chad called around four, and I just couldn’t sleep after, so I wrote.” Hope nodded toward the kitchen table.
“Oh? How is he? Is he hanging in there?” Harper pulled a mug out of the cabinet.
“He sounds conflicted. I can’t imagine it being easy. He is excited about the baby. I hope it cheers him up soon,” Hope added, sliding a plate of fruit toward her sister. “I haven’t had a lot of alone time with you. Come sit outside and fill me in with what’s going on. I want to know who this jackass is that you’re hung up on.”
Harper groaned dramatically, as she pulled her dark hair up into a ponytail. “Jackass is right.” She pulled the plate to herself and carried it and her mug toward the deck door.
Hope shook her head as she opted to start drinking water instead of more coffee. She reached around her sister and opened the door for her. “What's his name?”
Harper walked out onto the deck and set her plate and mug on the table, settling into her deck chair comfortably. “His name is Colin. I met him while shopping for paint for KoffeeHaus,” Harper added, sipping her coffee from the mug; black, like Hope enjoyed hers.
“So, what happened? Last time I heard, you guys were having a blast together.” Hope stretched her legs onto an adjacent chair.
“We were. He was helping me with the mural, hanging out until he had to go out to the field,” Harper muttered.
“Wait. He’s a Marine?” Hope set her water bottle down.
“Yeah, you know the whole town is full of them,” Harper added, a small smile pressing on her sister’s face.
“Well, yeah, but you didn’t say that. What happened? It's not like the field would break you up. Unless you had a hard time with it, which is fine, but it doesn’t sound like that’s what happened.” Hope was now fully immersed in this conversation.
“No, it wasn’t that he was out. It was what he did when he got back…” Harper was interrupted by the deck door opening.
“Well, good morning, ladies!” Mrs. Lulu’s bright greeting overshadowing their conversation, she was balancing a sleepy Isabella in one arm and a mug of coffee in the other.
“Good morning, Mrs. Lulu,” Hope smiled, as she slid her legs off the adjacent chair so that she could join them. “And good morning, Miss Isabella.”
Isabella rubbed her eyes and hid her face in Mrs. Lulu’s shoulder, the older woman pressing a tender kiss on her forehead. “I had a visitor last night.”
“Oh, you did? I hope she didn’t keep you up,” Hope chided, cocking her head to look at her daughter.
“No, no, I loved having her with me. We cuddled.” Mrs. Lulu wrapped her arms around the little girl, cradling her. “We didn’t mean to interrupt. What was the subject matter?” Mrs. Lulu leaned back and sipped her coffee.
Harper chimed in, “Colin.”
“Oh, Colin.” Mrs. Lulu took a deep breath, shaking her head. “You need to be done with that boy. You deserve better,” she added, lifting her mug in emphasis. “Hope, you knock some sense into your sister, before her heart is any more broken than it is.”
Hope looked over at her sister sympathetically. “I trust Mrs. Lulu’s judgement on this one. Whatever happened, you need to pick up the pieces and move on. It's not worth the hassle of going back and forth. There are so many great men out there, and you deserve one who honors you.”
“Hope, I want to. You have no idea. I want to just forget him, but I can’t. I thought I loved him. I thought he loved me.” Harper pulled her knees to her chest, crossing her legs as she sat on the deck chair.
“So, what did he do?” Hope wondered now, her curiosity piquing.
“You don’t want to know,” Harper grumbled, purposefully filling her mouth with fruit.
“Oh, Harper dear, I think you should tell your sister,” Mrs. Lulu said, as she coaxed Isabella into a sitting position on her lap.
“Oh, do tell, Harper.” Hope leaned toward her sister. This catch-up was much more dramatic than she thought. There was no other time that Hope had felt more grateful for Mrs. Lulu than right now. Mrs. Lulu served as a maternal figure to her when she moved to Jacksonville and worked at KoffeeHaus. Once she moved in with Chad, Mrs. Lulu took in Harper. Hope held on to the guilt of leaving her sister behind when their mom died, but they had to grieve, and they each grieved so differently. Harper was growing into a beautiful young lady, and Hope was nothing but proud of her artistic abilities.
“He got drunk, and things got out of hand; we both acted inappropriately.” Harper waved her hand, sighing.
“Harper. You’re not 21. Was Colin?” Hope chided, but her voice edged with sympathy.
“I wasn’t drinking. Colin was. Colin is 23. Don’t worry about it, seriously,” Harper attempted to redirect the conversation.
Hope sighed, reaching over for her coffee, preparing herself for Harper’s tale. Her worry for her sister continued to grow, which ended up being a nice distraction from her concern for Chad.
Hope, Harper, and Mrs. Lulu spent the morning talking about Harper’s dating woes, which did not quell Hope’s concerns in any sense. As the conversation intensified, Mrs. Lulu turned to distract Isabella from overhearing the discussion.
Hope adjusted on the couch, for the fifth time in that hour. She took a deep breath, glancing around to ensure that her secret had not been revealed. She wanted to labor at home as long as she could, before having to be trapped in the hospital. She began feeling the contractions during lunch, and started timing them when they did not disappear after an hour. Hope increased her water intake, hoping it may be mild dehydration, but to no avail. She attempted to distract herself by writing but just a few hours later, she was lying on the couch.
Mrs. Lulu walked by the couch, a concerned look on her face. “Hope, are you having contractions?”
“No, my back is sore, and this little one is kicking my ribs,” Hope feigned, and failed.
Mrs. Lulu shook her head. “I think you’re fibbing. You’ve been uncomfortable for several hours. How far apart are they?” She kneeled down, running her hand on Hope’s side.
“Five minutes,” Hope admitted, taking a deep breath as she felt another one coming on.
“Well, woman, what are you doing sitting on the couch? We need to get you to the hospital!” Mrs. Lulu stood up, calling for Harper. They went to work like a fire drill. Phone calls were made and bags were dragged to the van.
Hope was bundled up and taken to the van, after a neighbor came rushing over to pick up Isabella. Isabella was going to stay with another military family, who had a three-year-old daughter too. The girls befriended each other in the neighborhood early one morning while playing outside, and Hope was so thankful for the family during this time. She needed Harper and Mrs. Lulu with her, and couldn’t imagine what she would do without them in the labor and delivery room.
Harper drove the van and Mrs. Lulu held Hope’s hand. It was either Hope’s imagination or reality, but the contractions began to intensify. It wasn’t long before Hope found herself checked into a room of the Labor and Delivery department at the base hospital.
Hope pressed the back of her head against her pillow, breathing through her next contraction. She squeezed the bed rail, a cry escaping her clenched teeth.
“You’re ready to push, Hope,” the doctor said, as she adjusted the sheets for Hope to position herself on the bed.
Hope frantically shook her head, her face and forehead coated with sweat. “I can’t, I’m not ready.”
“You can do it, Hope. Think about it, your baby is almost here!” Harper attempted to encourage her sister, her arm around her sister’s neck, preparing her to bear down.
“C’mon girl, you can do it.” Mrs. Lulu gently coaxed Hope into position.
“Hope. Now. Push,” the doctor ordered.
Hope gripped Harper and Mrs. Lulu’s hands tightly and bore down. She cried out at the end of each push, and tears streamed down her cheeks. Hope had arrived at the hospital too late to receive an epidural. She tried to labor at home, but didn’t realize how quickly her second labor would progress. If it wasn’t for Mrs. Lulu, they may not have made it in time. It was less than an hour, and Hope was pushing.
And Hope pushed. Hope pushed with all her heart. She couldn’t wait to see her baby, hold it and cradle it, so she pushed. She pushed with all her might. The ladies surrounding her encouraged her with each contraction. It wasn’t long until they heard the shrills of a newborn break into the room.
“It's a boy!” the doctor exclaimed, placing the newborn onto Hope’s chest, the nurse covering him with a blanket and a baby blue knit cap on his head. Hope pulled him closer and wiped his tiny face as she cried over him. Harper had the honor of cutting the cord.
“He’s beautiful, Hope!” Harper exclaimed as she leaned over the bed and pressed a kiss on her sister’s head.
“You did good, girl, you did good.” Mrs. Lulu stroked Hope’s sweat-covered hair. “He’s precious.”
Hope cradled her son to her chest, stroking and admiring the perfect shape of his nose and eyes. She cooed over how much he looked like Chad. After some mother-son bonding, the nurse took the baby away and took him to the nursery to be evaluated, while Hope was moved to a different room to recover. The baby would be brought back after all the necessary tests were completed and was ready to nurse. Mrs. Lulu stepped out to make phone calls and make the official announcement. Harper stayed with Hope, and settled her into her new room by unpacking her bag.
“Harper?” Hope called out for her sister, as she organized her bag in the corner.
“Hmm?” Harper turned and made her way back to Hope’s bed, sitting on the edge. “Are you okay? Can I get you something? You did so amazing in there, Hope. You’re incredible.” She clasped her sister’s hand. Harper’s face was filled with happiness for her sister, but Hope recognized the etch of sadness in her eyes. She knew her sister had concealed a lot from her, and with the story about Colin only just being told, Hope knew there was more to the tale.
“Aww. I didn’t do anything special.” Hope patted her sister’s hand. “Did you call Dad?” Hope asked.
“Yes! While you were being moved. He is so excited that we have a little boy. He wants to know the name,” Harper grinned, a bit of the sadness vanishing as she pulled one knee onto the bed to face her sister.
“I will share the name soon, I promise,” Hope grinned. “I want Chad to know first. I hope Red Cross sent the message.”
“Do you know if he will get to come home?” Harper inquired.
Hope shook her head. “Probably not. They’ll just let him know that the baby is here and how we are doing.”
“Oh.” Harper sounded disappointed. “That isn’t cool.”
“Life of a military family, girl.” Hope frowned as she rested her head against the pillow. It was then that the nurse came into the room to assess Hope after delivery, to give her the nursery procedure, and see if Hope wanted the baby with her. Hope requested for the baby to stay with her instead of the nursery. It wasn’t long after the nurse left that another one pushed a small bassinet, with Mrs. Lulu following behind.
A clean bill of health. Their baby was healthy, and strong, at seven pounds eight ounces. After several hours, Mrs. Lulu and Harper gave Hope hugs and kisses before letting her rest. They promised to return the next day with Isabella.
Hope and the baby were left alone, and this was when she wrapped her son in her arms, just gazing at his perfect face. She unwrapped the blanket enough to count and recount his tiny fingers and toes. She bundled him back up and pressed tender kisses to his soft temple, until she couldn’t keep her eyes open. Hope moved him back to the bassinet and returned to the bed. She prayed that Chad would hear the news soon. She knew he would be so proud.