Chad
Chad pressed himself against Hope, her back to the couch, his hands stroking the sides of her cheeks. He wanted to explore everything about her, as if it was their first time together. He wanted to feel her, taste her, and make her moan. It was all his mind could take in at this moment. He kissed down her neck, letting his tongue drag across her silky skin. When he arrived at her ear, he tucked stray strands of hair behind it, before whispering, “Let’s go to the bedroom, before we are interrupted by a little person.”
He stood, gently helping her push herself off the couch. He laced his fingers in her hand and led the way down the hallway, both of them tiptoeing passed Isabella’s room, where she slept so soundly. He closed their door when they stepped in and pressed Hope’s back to the wall next to the door. His kiss was hungry, passionate, and desperate. Hope started to undo his uniform shirt, and he pulled her tank top up and over her head, his mouth going straight to her neck, taking in her scent. He pressed tender kisses under her hairline, behind her ear, his hands busy, working his fingers under the waistband of her leggings.
Hope’s fingers dragged across his back, sending goosebumps down his arms, releasing a low growl from his throat. The light from the outside trickled through the curtains in their room; lines of light graced over Hope’s form and all Chad could do was take in her beauty. Every inch of her, every moment with her. He held her close and pressed another passionate and hungry kiss to her lips before guiding her to the bed.
Hope had a way of growing shy when he explored her. He climbed into bed behind her, his hands tracing over her silhouette. His fingers grazed her outer thighs, dragging upwards and around her stomach, pausing to take in her beautiful figure, and then rising up to pull her toward him. He lost himself in her hair, whispering, “I want you. All of you.”
The alarm blared at 0200. He quickly shut it off, but he failed to do it fast enough to prevent waking the small figure he had been cradling. He leaned over and pressed a tender kiss on her forehead. “It’s okay, Peanut, keep sleeping.”
Chad had snuck into Isabella’s room shortly after Hope had fallen asleep. He found himself holding his sleeping child. He traced the edge of her cheek, barely taking in the smooth, flushed cheeks. He studied the way her curly hair laid on her forehead, how it curled in its own wayward pattern. She would look so different the next time he saw her; that is, if the estimation was right, that they would be gone for six months.
His heart ached at the thought of leaving Isabella and Hope. He held her form to his chest, unable to muffle his own cries and tears. How is it possible to love someone as much as he loved this little girl? It was hard to leave, but it broke him saying goodbye to Isabella, knowing she would never understand why he left for long periods of time. He would miss her laughter, her giggles, and the way she would wake him up on Saturday mornings.
He would miss pouring her a bowl of sugar-filled cereal, then one for himself, and watching cartoons before Hope was up. It was those moments he would cherish, and it was those moments he would look forward to returning home for. He held more tears in; he didn’t want to wake her, and didn’t want to wake Hope.
Chad slowly stood from the glider that sat in the corner of Isabella’s room. They used it to read to her, and to cradle her when she had a bad dream. He lowered her body onto the bed, and pulled the covers over her. “Bye, Peanut.” His voice nearly cracked as he stroked the last bit of her hair out of her face.
When he walked toward his door, he heard the sheets stir and a small, voice call out, “I love you, Daddy.” It was all he needed to hear.
He rushed to her side to ensure she was still asleep, or on her way to falling asleep again, but he wanted to see her one more time. “I love you too, baby.” He pressed a hand to her head, and watched her eyes shutter closed as he stroked her hair until he was satisfied that she was in a deep slumber.
It was then he rose and made his way out of her room one more time. He reached up and wiped the last escaped tears from his face and made his way to the kitchen. He started the coffee pot, and smiled, noticing that Hope must’ve gotten up to clean up the kitchen before she went to sleep, probably while he was in the shower. He traced the lip of his mug, leaning against the counter, as if the weight of the world was pushing him up against it.
His thoughts went to his mission. He had nearly one thousand men and women, and he had to ensure they completed the mission and returned home, and his goal was no casualties. The idea of losing any one of his troops, crumbled him. He had so much to review before they left, but he also had to spend as much time here as possible.
His wife, who was sound asleep in the other room, would be giving birth to their second child soon, and he was heart broken that he was not going to there for it. He sighed shaking his head as he tried to distract himself with preparation. When the coffee was ready, he poured a mug full for himself, stirring heaping pours of sugar into it. He slid the mug to the edge of the counter, then walked it over to the kitchen table and set it there. Walking over to the stack of files and papers, Chad picked them up and placed them next to his coffee. He went through each document, scanning for accuracy, ensuring that Hope had access to all the benefits, as a wife and mother of his children. He also ensured that Hope was his power of attorney and could access any accounts, whether her name was on it or otherwise.
There wasn’t a paper out of place. Hope was organized; she knew what she was doing. He smiled as he replaced the stack on her kitchen office desk, then pulled opened the drawer and took a clean sheet of paper as well as one of her beloved pens. He was going to write her a letter and leave it in the diaper bag. Whether Hope was going to find it before he returned was fate, but he was sure that she would use the diaper bag pretty soon after the birth of their child.
He pulled out the chair that was at her desk and sat down. His handwriting wasn’t great; in fact, Hope had teased him many times about his “chicken scratch.” The letter was not one that he typically wrote; although he was physically and verbally affectionate, written affection was not his forte. Once he was satisfied, he signed off on it, and folded it into a trifold. He dug through the office supplies on the desk to find an envelope and a piece of tape.
Chad made his way back to the bedroom, only to stop to the nursery. The room that they painstakingly put together, painted, and chose the furniture for. He slid his hand on the top of the dresser where the diaper bag rested. He lifted the cloth top and slid the letter inside, then patted the top to assure that the letter was there for Hope to find.
Before he left the room, he turned around to study it one more time. He took in the fresh colors, the well-decorated walls; the love that was already poured into the room. He smiled, thinking the next time he walked into this room, a baby would already be here. Chad turned to walk out and was startled to find Hope had come out of their room, searching for him.
She wrapped her arms around him, and he felt the tears soak against his skin. He wrapped his arms around her protectively, stroking her bedhead hair. “What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
“I thought you left. I woke up and the bed was empty. You weren’t in the kitchen and the papers were stacked, and you had gone through them. Your coffee mug was empty. Your rucksacks were gone. I thought you left without saying bye.” Hope’s voice was a whisper cry. His heart broke, thinking that for even a brief second, she thought he left without a final kiss or a hug.
He held her tight and kissed the top of her head. “Listen, I will never leave like that, ever. I’m here. I wanted to just soak a few things in before I showered. Baby, I’m here, I’m not gone yet.”
Hope nodded against him, wiping her tears from her face. “Thank you. What else do you need to finish?” she sniffled, squeezing his waist. The long t-shirt she was wearing hovered over the tops of her thighs, the belly taking much of the fabric.
“Nothing. I was coming in to shower and get ready.” He held her in the doorway of the nursery.
“Okay. You go do that. I’ll make you something you can take with you to eat. You’re going to need it.” She spoke softly, moving away, their bodies parting. Her fingers danced across his hip, as if she hesitated to step away, but she did.
Chad nodded, his only words left were spoken with his fingers. He linked his fingers in hers, squeezing her hand reassuringly, before walking away from Hope and toward their room. They would get through this, and the day he returned would be the most magnificent day any of them experienced. He just knew it.