Busting balls for London is definitely nothing new to me. I worked so hard to get her touring the world with me as my official photographer. I knew that not only would she nail the gig, as she’s exceptionally talented, but it would also give me a chance to spend quality time with her, and as Jake had suggested, show her the real me. I figured I had three months where we were in each other’s pockets 24/7 to pull out all the stops. If she didn’t want me after that, she probably never would.

Pushing for what I wanted, namely London, paid off for me when she and I first met. My dogged perseverance got us both what we needed in the end, so why can’t it be equally successful now? I worked it like a boss that time, although the honeymoon period was ridiculously short-lived before all this Marnie shit kicked off. At least now I know that handling my cards right and playing the waiting game with her can and does yield results. I just need to keep my head down and hold my nerve. Easier said than done for someone who was never blessed with patience, but if it’s the last thing I do, I’m going to get my girl and my baby back where they belong—right here with me. I’m chasing my happy ever after, and if I’m breathing, I’m gonna catch it.

Even though all I have is one solitary ultrasound scan, I feel close to Squirt already, and I want to build on that, so I start speaking to him/her. Aloud sometimes if I’m alone, or in my head if there are others around. Just kind of narrating the things I’m doing. I don’t know why; I guess I have no other real way of connecting with him or her, so for now, this will have to be it.

On a whim one day, I decide to take it one step further and send London a message for Squirt via Facebook, and then it becomes a regular thing every few days. She never replies, but I can see she reads the messages, and she hasn’t blocked me or asked me to stop. That’s enough of a response for me, and it gives me hope that if I continue to work toward my goals, I have a solid shot at convincing her to give us—the three of us—a second chance.

Over the next few weeks, I put my plan into action, and I feel strangely optimistic. About some things anyway. Not everything. Definitely not about the whole Luke and Marnie situation. In fact, every time I think about that, I want to punch someone. Half the time that someone is Luke, the other half it’s me. I busy myself to keep from focusing on the betrayals—Luke, Marnie, me—and their impact on London and Squirt. There’s a real chance that I may lose them both. Dwelling on that is a fool’s game though, and I refuse to be a fool anymore. I need my mental energy for all of the plans I have if they’re going to become a reality.

As well as my mental state of my mind, I also start paying more attention to my physical condition. As a family, we’re pretty blessed in that we all tend toward the leaner, more muscular physique without even really trying or having to be superstrict with our diet or anything, thank Christ. Even so, the pity parties I threw myself when this shit kicked off had started to take their toll—but not anymore.

I hit the gym every day and work out like my life depends on it. The results are pretty much instant. I look and feel a whole lot better than I did just a few weeks ago, which feeds into my state of mind. Like my mom said, I need to be the best version of me I can be if I’m going to convince London that life with me is anything other than the living nightmare she currently thinks it is.

I call Paul and fill him in on developments with the move back to the city and the fact that I’m taking on a larger role at the club—partly because he needs to know our whereabouts on any given day for bookings, personal appearances, interviews, and corporate gigs, but also because I have an idea that involves and affects the band, and I need his help to make it a reality.

“Hey, Arlo. How are you holding up?”

“Hey. Okay, I guess. I mean, I’m stuck in a fucking shit storm, but I’m managing to keep my head above it all. Just. I think that’s the best I can hope for at this point.”

“I guess you’re right. So to what do I owe the pleasure? I hope everything’s okay. Apart from the obvious, of course.”

“Yeah, all good. Listen, I need you to do something for me. Well for us, really, the whole band.”

“Sure, okay. Shoot.”

“I want to put on a Heartless Few gig at the club to preview the new album.”

“What? When you say ‘the club,’ you mean 12AM Mass?”

“Yeah, I want to debut the album there. Kind of like the usual listening party bullshit, but with real people in the audience, like fans and shit, instead of a bunch of clueless industry monkeys in hipster designer suits. One of those intimate and exclusive ‘secret’ gigs, only I don’t want it to be too secret. In fact, quite the opposite. I want it live-streamed globally, and that’s where you come in.”

“Okaaaaay?”

I guess he’s right to be confused.

“Yeah. I need you to hook up a TV station to get behind it and broadcast it live, both on TV and online. I don’t think it will be a very hard sell, since as you keep telling me, we’re hot shit right now. From what I can see, the interest in me particularly and this whole Marnie/London thing isn’t going to slow down anytime soon.” In fact, if the hordes of paps outside the studio, house, and club are anything to go by, it’s actually ramping up.

“Add the fact that this is all new and exclusive material, and it’ll be the biggest scoop of the year. You’ll have networks biting your hand off for the broadcast rights. We could do it as exclusive tickets to competition winners and superfans, and maybe a few available for purchase with the proceeds going to charity. It’ll be the gig of the year.”

“No doubt you’re right, but I’m just not sure—”

“Why I want to do this?”

“Well yeah. I mean, like you say, the heat on you and therefore the rest of the band too is pretty intense at the moment. My thought would be that it’s a good time to lie low, not draw attention to yourself.”

“Yeah, well when have you known me to run in the opposite direction to controversy? I guess that’s why I’m the front man and you’re the suit, right?”

“I guess so.” His tone is clipped, and I can tell I’ve offended him. It’s not the first time and probably won’t be the last, but he’s a big boy and he can take it. Plus when we do well, he does well, so even if he doesn’t like it, I know he’ll shut up and deal if the price is right.

“I guess so too. Let’s just say that I have my reasons, but that’s not important. What’s important is that we make this happen.”

“So when do we need to get this show on the road, so to speak?”

“In two weeks.”

“What? No. I mean, the album isn’t even finished. There’s no way—”

“I don’t pay you to tell me no. The music is my concern. I’ll take care of that side of things. I haven’t discussed it with the guys yet, but I know we can make it happen. Do what you need to do, but know that no isn’t an option.”

“But—”

I hang up. I briefly wonder which part of “no isn’t an option” he didn’t understand. Patience is in short supply for me at the best of times, even more so now. I’m not about to waste time listening to his feeble excuses.

-FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE-

Global superstars the Heartless Few have announced their first ever “secret” live show to promote the launch of their forthcoming studio album, Fight[or]Flight. The gig will be held at a secret location in New York, only to be revealed a short time before it takes place on Friday of this week. Tickets to this intimate and exclusive event will be available to a select handful of dedicated fans, and those lucky enough to win tickets through promotions. An even smaller number will be available for sale, with all proceeds being multiplied by the band and donated to charities supporting families battling cancer.

The album comes hot on the heels of the band’s recent Cold, Hard, & Heartless tour, and the accompanying coffee-table book and photographic exhibition, Arlo Jones//Cold, Hard, & Heartless. The tour sold out globally, seeing the band smash presales records in many territories. Fight[or]Flight follows the band’s smash-hit album Relentless, which according to independent data was the biggest-selling album of last year, with sales exceeding three million units. It also earned Grammys for Best Alternative Album and Best Alternative Song (“Can’t Make Me”), while dominating the global charts for more than sixteen weeks.

In a yet-to-be-aired interview with Ellen DeGeneres, lead vocalist and lead guitarist Arlo Jones expresses his pride in the new album and gives a sneak peek of what to expect.

“We’re so [email protected]$#ing proud of this album. We came off the tour pumped and with our creative juices flowing. Although we were physically and mentally exhausted from all those weeks on the road, instead of taking a break we decided to harness that creative inspiration and go straight into the studio to work on it. Call us gluttons for punishment, but we don’t regret it for a minute. You can sleep when you’re dead, right? The result is some of our best work to date, and we’re pumped to be sharing it with the world.”

When asked about the meaning behind the album, Jones said the following:

“It’s about love and loss. It’s about struggle and hope. It’s about bleeding and healing. It’s about moving forward and slipping backward. It’s about people, and how we deal when the sh#t hits the fan. Some of us choose flight, others choose to stay and fight. Which one am I? Listen to the album and find out.”

Presale registration for the limited release tickets opens at 9:00 a.m. tomorrow, and the tickets are expected to sell out in moments. Further gig details will be released to ticket holders via text message and email on the day of the event.

Fight[or]Flight goes on sale August 1.

-ENDS-

Focusing on the imminent gig is the perfect distraction. The fact that it doesn’t involve pickling my internal organs in vodka is an added bonus. I have to channel so much of my energy into making sure this gig goes off without a hitch—which is easier said than done—that there’s no time for anything else.

The paparazzi have been camping outside the studio for days, waiting for any glimpse of the guys and me. Likewise outside my house. And it’s not just the press that has been going into overdrive. The fans are losing their shit too. Big-time. Crowds have been gathering since the announcement of the gig was made, and social media commentary has blown up. In fact, we’ve pretty much melted the internet with all the speculation about how and where to obtain tickets, and who will be lucky enough to snag one. There are tags, tweets, and tantrums, but most of all, there is a great sense of anticipation.

Perfect.