Becky
It didn’t take long at all for the gossip websites to start retweeting a photo circulating of Travis and me at the ice cream parlour in Bala. The photographer had managed to snap a few pictures on their phone as the three of us walked away from the shop, ice creams in hand, but most of them were blurry. The only photo with any clarity had been the one of us paying at the counter, with Travis’s hand on the small of my back, but thankfully my cap had obscured most of my face.
To my knowledge, they hadn’t figured out who the ‘mystery woman’ was, but I knew it was only a matter of time, and I was determined not to stalk the websites. It would only fuel into my paranoia, and I wanted to enjoy what little time Travis had left in Ontario.
After work on Tuesday, I picked Aiden up from Max’s house before driving to the grocery store to pick up a few things for dinner.
I made it halfway through our shopping excretion before the skin on the back of my neck started crawling. I felt like someone was watching me, but every time I looked over my shoulder, I saw nothing alarming. Just regular people grocery shopping, like us.
“Mom! I asked if we could get chips like ten times now!” Aiden whined, drawing my attention back to him.
“Sorry Aiden, but no. Chips are expensive and unhealthy.”
“Uncle Braden lets me get them,” he muttered, rolling his eyes.
I normally would have scolded him, but I said nothing, that prickly feeling back full tilt. I swung around, catching someone’s back as they rounded the aisle and disappeared. I told myself I was just being paranoid, and continued to push my cart forward.
Aiden sulked as we made our way to the checkout. While we waited in the line, my ears caught the sound of my name. I looked over, seeing Melanie Clayton and Kristen Landry standing in front of the magazine rack. I’d gone to high school with both of them and still had to endure Kristen’s presence during Aiden’s soccer games.
Suddenly, it made perfect sense—why I felt like someone was watching me, because they definitely were, and they weren’t being discreet about it at all.
In high school, they alternated between being outright cruel to me and overly sweet. It depended on when Brock was around, really. If he was there—they were nice. Fake nice, but nice. If he wasn’t there, they gossiped and tittered about me. They were adeptly skilled at making me feel like a social pariah. Still were, apparently.
It was Kristen’s second time this week trying to cut me back down to size. She hadn’t been too thrilled to see Travis at the game on Sunday, because he’d been with me. I’d forgotten all about their brief fling together until that moment.
But, the way Travis had reacted to her made her comments bounce off me.
“I couldn’t believe it myself when I saw,” Kristen was saying. She glanced up, caught me looking at them, and smirked before turning her head. “I mean, Becky Miller? Why her?” she lowered her voice a fraction, but I could still hear her. That was the point, though. That was always the point with those two.
“I know, I don’t get it,” Melanie tittered, shaking her head. I looked away, flooded with embarrassment and anger. “Clearly, she’s just a gold-digger.”
“That’ll be a hundred and thirty-five dollars and thirty-eight cents,” the cashier said. I pulled my card out of my wallet and paid. Moving my cart toward the end of the conveyer, I started putting the groceries away.
“Maybe it’s a pity thing,” Kristen mused, peering at me again with consideration, watching while I loaded up the bags with my purchases. “He always did like charity work.” I stiffened, aggravated.
I was tired of petty immature women who made me feel terrible about myself and I was sick to death of being the subject matter of choice for gossip. If Aiden wasn’t with me, I would have stomped over and given them both a piece of my mind, but I was trying to teach him to ignore bullies and rude comments. No matter where you lived, there was always at least one person who felt the need to rain on other people’s parades.
Melanie and Kristen’s hostility didn’t change the fact that Travis and I were together. Their lack of approval meant very little to me, and I knew with his career, I’d need to do my best to tune them out.
When I turned to tell Aiden to follow me, he wasn’t waiting beside the cart. He was marching over to Melanie and Kristen. “You aren’t nice!” he scolded them, his brow furrowed with anger, his little hands clenched tightly in fists that he held at his sides. “Travis doesn’t pity us, but I bet he’d pity you! You’re horrible and—and you’re UGLY!”
“Aiden, come here,” I told him sternly, flushing at the attention we were receiving from the other shoppers. “It’s not nice to call people names.”
“They’re calling you names and saying mean things!” Aiden pointed out hotly. Several shoppers glanced over, watching the scene unfold with hungry eyes. I stood taller, lifting my chin.
“We don’t call people names, and we don’t say mean things. If they decide that’s how they want to treat other people, they will find themselves very lonely one day. That won’t be us, bud,” I said, not caring that everyone else could hear me as well. Melanie and Kristen gawked at me, but I barely spared them a second glance.
Aiden’s shoulders sagged as he walked back to me. He turned to face Melanie and Kristen. “I’m sorry for calling you ugly, but you’re still horrible.”
“Aiden!”
“I’m sorry for calling you horrible to your face.”
“Good enough,” I sighed. “Let’s go.”
Kristen gasped, completely affronted. I shot her a look that conveyed exactly what I thought of her before we walked out of the store.
I pushed the cart through the parking lot with one hand while I rested the other on Aiden’s shoulder. He sniffled, looking up at me with wide blue eyes full of hurt.
“I hate how mean people are,” he said, his voice heavy with sadness.
“You can’t focus on how mean people can be,” I told him gently. “You have to focus on the good. There are some real jerks in this town, Aiden, but you’ll encounter people like that wherever you go. So long as you surround yourself with good people, you’ll be okay…and there are a lot of good people in this town too.”
“What about you?” he asked me, still looking at me like I held all of the answers to life’s complicated questions. “Doesn’t it make you sad?”
A few years ago, Melanie and Kristen’s words might have destroyed me. Every year, my skin thickened a little more and I cared less and less about the opinions of people who didn’t like me. It wasn’t always easy to let the comments roll off my back, but I’d gotten better at it, especially the last little while.
“Sometimes,” I answered truthfully. “But at the end of the day, I know I’m blessed.” I stopped walking and pulled him against my side, kissing him loudly on the top of the head.
Aiden laughed, his arms wrapping around my waist. He hugged me tightly, staying that way for a moment longer than he typically did.
“I heard something this afternoon,” Katie said, pausing to swirl her glass of wine around. We were sitting in the living room, Katie in the old armchair that nobody ever sat in, Tessa on the other side of the couch with me and Elle sitting crossed legged on the floor.
They’d finally roped me into doing the girls’ night that Tessa and Elle had threatened me with after finding out about Travis. I’d told Katie to come along, thinking that I would need an ally against the other two. Gauging by her tone, I wondered if I would come to regret that.
“What’s that?” I asked, reaching forward to grab a small handful of popcorn. According to Tessa, girl’s nights had to include boxed wine, five different candy selections, and popcorn. If Aiden wasn’t already in bed, he’d be livid at me.
“That Aiden told off Kristen and Melanie at the grocery store yesterday,” Katie finished, arching her eyebrows at me.
“He did,” I nodded, trying not to smile.
“Really? What happened?” Tessa asked, her eyebrows raising in surprise. Aiden was gentle and kind-hearted, he didn’t often have outbursts.
“He overheard the things they were saying about me, and he went off on them for being mean. He also might have called them ugly, which wasn’t cool but—“
“If the shoe fits,” Elle muttered. “They are pretty ugly, personality wise.”
I shrugged, nonplused. “Whatever, I’m beginning to realize that I don’t actually care what they think.”
“Cheers!” Katie proclaimed, lifting her glass.
Not long after that, the girls roped me into talking about the trip to Bala Falls.
“Is he still leaving in September?” Elle asked.
Adjusting so that I was sitting with my legs tucked beneath me, I lifted one shoulder up in a shrug. “We haven’t really discussed it yet, but I’d imagine so. I can’t picture him walking away from music, and I don’t want him to.”
“People make long distance relationships work all the time,” Tessa said with a dismissive wave of her hand. She wasn’t concerned about it, but I was.
The feelings I’d been so worried about catching were beginning to afflict me, to the point where the very idea of going months without seeing him made me feel absolutely dreadful.
“You should definitely have that conversation soon,” Katie interjected, giving me a pointed look as if she knew where my head had gone.
“I will. He’s coming over for dinner on Thursday, and we’ll talk after Aiden’s in bed,” I informed her.
“Are you cooking?” Elle asked, her lips twitching with amusement. I nodded, and she grinned. “Better tell him beforehand, then.”
Using oven mitts, I carefully removed the lasagna I’d spent the last two hours trying to cook. Tessa had sent me the recipe, insisting that not even I could mess it up. I’d been extra careful to follow her instructions perfectly.
I set it down on the stove top, hoping that it tasted as good as it looked. Cooking wasn’t really my forte, but Travis had already prepared a fancy meal for me and I felt that it was my turn to make something other than frozen pizza. Knowing how he felt about cooking made me want to try harder.
Knuckles rapped against the door, and I called for Aiden to answer it. Travis was right on time. I grabbed the shiny silver spoon holder off the stove, using it as a mirror to make sure I looked okay. My hair was a little messy in the high ponytail I’d thrown it in, so I did my best to smooth it out.
“Is your mom home?” a voice that definitely wasn’t Travis’s asked. I froze for a fraction of a second before darting out of the kitchen and down the hallway to the front door. Aiden held the door open, frowning while he stared at the stranger in front of him.
“Yes. Who are you?”
My heart dropped into my stomach when I came face to face with Richie for the first time in over eight years. “Aiden, go to your room please.”
“But Mom!”
“Now!” I barked, my hands trembling. I normally wasn’t one to yell, and Aiden’s eyes widened with surprise. I gave him a look and he scurried down the hall to his room. I braced myself, raising my eyes to look at the monster that had terrorized me for years.
Richie didn’t look like the carefree boy I’d fallen for all those years ago. The constant use of hard drugs had aged him. His hair was thinning, his skin was sallow, and he was dressed in torn jeans and a black t-shirt that fit loosely over his wiry arms. His cheeks were sunken in, but the same cruel dark brown eyes still looked back at me, a glint to them that I didn’t trust.
“Long time no see, Becky,” the sound of his voice made my skin crawl.
“You can’t come within thirty feet of either one of us,” I said, surprised to find that my voice wasn’t shaking as badly as I expected it to. “Leave right now, or I’ll call the cops.”
“I’m not leaving until I get what I came here for,” Richie shrugged, enjoying the panic he was causing. The colour drained from my face, and I stared at him with astounded horror.
“And what’s that?” I demanded.
Richie cast a glance through the door, down the hallway where Aiden had disappeared. He smiled slowly, a cruel smile that made me feel cold straight into the marrow of my bones.
“Let’s be real Becky…I want nothing to do with the kid. I have zero interest in being a dad, but when I found out you hooked yourself a millionaire country singer, well. Let’s just say an opportunity arose that I couldn’t resist.”
“What opportunity?” I asked through my teeth.
“I need money, and if I don’t get it…I will make your life a living hell.”
“How much?”
“Fifty-thousand should be more than enough,” he answered, smiling at me with yellowed teeth.
“You’re out of your mind,” I seethed. “I don’t have that kind of money.”
“But your boyfriend does,” Richie pointed out. “You have one week to decide. Either I get my money, or I get the kid.” Finished with his threats, he turned and began to walk down the driveway to the sidewalk to a gold Sunfire parked against the curb in front of my house.
Something in me snapped. I grabbed the wooden baseball bat from the front hall closet and chased after him. He heard me coming and turned, a look of pure amusement on his face that only served to fuel my anger.
“You are a vile piece of shit, Richie Anderson, and I’m not afraid of you anymore. You’re not going to get anything from me, and I swear to god if you come sniffing around here again—“
“You’ll what?” he laughed. “Hit me with the bat? I’m so scared Becky, so scared.” He stepped toward me, and I pushed the end of the bat against his Adams apple, a venomous look in my eyes. I didn’t care that we were on the sidewalk in front of my house, that my neighbours could potentially see this drama unfolding.
“You should be,” I promised him, my eyes narrowed. “I’m not the timid girl I was back then, Richie. I’m not going to let you walk all over me, I’m not afraid of you anymore.”
“Maybe you should be,” he said, pressing his throat against the bat. His eyes were wild, almost deranged. When he laughed, my blood ran cold in my veins, but I held my ground…pushing the bat a little harder against his Adam’s apple.
The sound of a diesel engine pulling onto my road had us both looking toward the end of street. Richie made a run for his car when Travis’s truck pulled into the driveway. I stared at the licence plate, repeating the seven letters and numbers over and over in my head until I knew it was embedded in my memory.
I closed my eyes for a moment, my heart still pounding with adrenaline. I could hear Travis’s truck door shut.
“Who was that Becky?” he asked from behind me. I turned to face him, trying to slow my breathing. Travis had never met him before, as he’d already been long gone pursuing his music when Richie moved to town. But the horrified expression on my sheet white face was an answer enough.
“Richie,” I muttered, watching as Travis’s eyes darkened at the mention of his name. He put his hands on the side of my arms, holding me.
“Are you okay? What did he say? What did he do?” he demanded, assessing me for damage.
“It doesn’t matter. I’m calling the police.” I pulled away from his embrace, my eyes stinging with tears, and stopped when I caught sight of Aiden as he stood on the front porch, eyes wide with fear. I had no idea how much of the last several minutes he saw, but the need to comfort and protect him propelled me forward.
“Mom?” he asked, his voice tiny and unsure as I stopped before him.
I dropped the bat as I sank to my knees to take him in my arms. “It’s okay, Aiden.”
“Who was that? Why did you send me to my room? Why were you chasing that man with a bat?” Aiden asked, his questions coming out in rapid fire succession.
I’d imagined this horrible scenario a thousand times before, in a thousand different ways. I’d hoped that he would leave us alone, but I should have known that he’d be back.
“It was a bad person,” I choked out, my voice raw. I couldn’t tell him the whole truth, not yet anyway. “But, he’s gone now. I’m going to have to report it to the police though, to keep other people safe. Why don’t you go play Xbox?”
“Okay,” he said, his voice lacking its usual enthusiasm when I told him he could play.
I squeezed his shoulder gently before returning to the kitchen for my phone. I dialed 911 and waited, each dial tone like an electric shock to my system.
“Hi, yes. My abusive ex just showed up at my residence and made threats.”
Miraculously, I managed to relay the information without falling completely apart, keeping my voice as low as possible to avoid alarming Aiden.
Travis had brought him into the living room and I’d heard him tell Aiden that everything was going to be okay and not to worry about it. He put on a video game to distract him.
The dispatcher told me officers were on their way to take a report. I hung up the phone and Travis came into the kitchen, wrapping his arms tightly around me. I buried my head into his shoulder, fighting to breathe. The knowledge that I’d have to recount it all to them when they arrived sat heavily on me.
I remained in his arms for a few moments before I pulled away, drawing in a pain-laced breath. I rubbed at my collar bone and turned my head, looking back out into the living room.
Aiden knew his father wasn’t a good person and that was why he wasn’t involved in our lives, but he didn’t know just how terrible his father was. I’d wanted to protect him from it, because I knew the knowledge would shake him. I worried that it would ruin his innocence, or at least a portion of it.
“We should call your brothers,” Travis said, bringing my attention back to him. My hand pressed harder against my chest.
“I can’t, Travis,” I bit my lip, shaking my head. “If Brock finds out, he’ll go after Richie again and he’s got a record already. I don’t want him back in jail, but I’m not about to let Richie blackmail me either.”
“What did he want?”
I dreaded this question, and the last thing I wanted to do was answer it. “He wanted money from me, and lots of it…or else he’d come after Aiden.”
The tick in Travis’s jaw was back, and his usually warm eyes hardened. “We’re not letting him anywhere near Aiden, Becs. Or you.”
The doorbell rang, and my feet refused to move toward it. Travis seemed to understand, and he took it upon himself to open it to two police officers.
After the police officers took my statement, they assured me that they’d be on the lookout for a vehicle that matched my description. I opted to press charges against Richie for harassment and extortion, because I knew that he wasn’t going to go away on his own.
Officer Browning had assured me they would call with any updates, but I wasn’t feeling so sure. Richie had a devious glint in his eyes, and I knew he was willing to do whatever it took to get what he wanted.
I watched the police cruiser pull out from our driveway before I turned my head. “Aiden, please start getting ready for bed. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”
He nodded, abandoning the video game he’d been half-heartedly playing without complaint, and said goodnight to Travis before making his way down the hall to the bathroom. I could hear the tell-tale sound of the sink running as he brushed his teeth, followed by a pause and the flush of the toilet.
Facing Travis, I opened my mouth to thank him—but no words came out. While I was busy talking to the police officers on the back porch, he had heated up a plate of lasagna for Aiden and kept him busy.
I couldn’t seem to formulate words to thank him—but he inheritably seemed to know how grateful I was. He stepped toward me, taking me in his arms and planted a kiss on my forehead.
“I understand why you don’t want to tell your brothers, but…” he trailed off, leaning back a little so that he could look me in the eyes.
“But what?” I demanded harshly, stepping away from his embrace. I didn’t mean to snap at him, but the whole situation made my body and head thrum with anxiety.
“I don’t like the idea of them not knowing. How can they be diligent if they don’t know he’s back?” Travis explained patiently, his eyes imploring me to listen.
I hesitated. He had a point. I didn’t think Richie had any friends in town still, but someone could recognize him. Telling my brothers would prepare them in case they caught wind of his return, or happened to see him themselves. I shuddered to think what Brock would do without fair warning.
“You’re right,” I relented, my shoulders deflating with a sigh. “I’ll text them and ask them to come over.”
“I’ll call them, you go tuck Aiden in,” Travis said, pulling me back into his arms. He kissed my lips softly and looked at me with reverence. “You are not alone, Becky. You don’t have to handle this by yourself. I’ve got you.”
I nodded, giving him the tiniest smile I could muster before I turned and walked down the hall, knocking lightly against Aiden’s door before I opened it. He was sitting on his bed with his legs crossed, dressed in his pajamas, just waiting for me. He looked up when I opened the door.
“I’m sorry I took so long,” I apologized, drawing in a deep breath as I walked across his room and sank down on his mattress. I reached out, brushing his fringe out of his eyes. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” Aiden nodded, unsmiling. “Who was that man really, Mom?”
I took a moment to glance around my son’s bedroom. It was still decorated in the dinosaur theme he’d picked when he was three. I had to close my eyes for a moment, trying to prepare myself for this conversation.
“Remember how I told you that your biological father wasn’t a good person, and that’s why he wasn’t involved in our lives?” Aiden nodded, his brow furrowing with confusion. “When I was pregnant with you, he hurt me really bad. I had to go to the hospital. He went to jail.”
“Was that him?” Aiden’s blue eyes were full of worry, and I hated that we had to have this horrible conversation. I hated that this was our reality, but I knew not telling him wasn’t an option. He’d already seen—and likely overheard—too much. I nodded, my eyes watering. “Why is he back? Is he going to hurt you again?”
“I don’t want you to worry about that. I am safe, so are you. The police are going to take care of it to make sure he doesn’t come back. They’re going to take him back to jail.”
Aiden was still young enough to believe that the police would solve any issue, because they were the good guys, so my words were able to console him. Pulling his bedding down, I helped him get comfortable before laying down beside him. “I love you, buddy,” I whispered, kissing him on the tip of his nose.
“I love you too,” he said, the last word stretching with his yawn. When I went to stand, he grabbed my arm, his eyes pleading with mine. “Can you stay until I fall asleep, Mommy?”
“Of course,” I whispered, laying my head back down on his pillow, facing him. My heart ached for the fear and displacement he must be feeling. I hated Richie with an intensity that alarmed me. I hated him for everything he’d taken from me, and from Aiden.
I had finally gotten to a place where I was beginning to accept the past for what it was, mainly because Aiden had no recollections of the terror. But, with Richie’s return and his threats, he’d invited fear into our home once again.
This time, my fear didn’t cripple me. It motivated me. I still felt it coursing through my body, but it didn’t render me immobile. I knew what to do in order to protect myself and my son.
Aiden fought sleep, his eyes growing heavier by the second. Within five minutes, he was snoring softly.
I kissed his forehead and pulled myself out of his bed, careful not to disturb him.
Voices drifted down the hallway as I quietly closed Aiden’s door. Brock and Braden had arrived, and from the sound of it, Travis had given them the news.
Brock saw me first, and moved toward me with a pained look in his stormy eyes. He hugged me tightly before releasing me. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” I said, my spine stiffening with resolve. “Or I will be fine...I’m sure Travis already told you that Richie’s back, but I called the police to report it. Please...don’t go after him.”
I was asking for a lot, but I hoped that both of my brothers listened. Richie seemed almost desperate, and he hadn’t cared at all about breaching the restraining order, which told me he would go to drastic measures. I wasn’t sure what kind of trouble he’d gotten himself into, but I didn’t know what he was capable of and I didn’t want my brothers’ in the crossfire.
Brock paced the living room like a caged animal, brushing his long hair behind his ears. His muscles were coiled with tension and anger that rolled through him. “You can’t expect me to do nothing about this.”
“That’s exactly what I expect from you,” I shot back, standing my ground. “You just got married, Brock. You’re building a life with Tessa, you don’t need to go to jail again. Let the police handle it.”
“She’s right, Brock. As much as I want to gut him myself, we can’t intervene like last time,” Braden voiced from the armchair. His words spoke of reason, but he was every bit as pissed off as Brock was. Braden was more inclined to think with his fists, too.
I stared at my surprising ally, nodding.
“Fine, we won’t hunt him down. But I can’t promise that I won’t tear him limb from limb if he comes anywhere near you or Aiden,” Brock said decisively. “And until the police find him, I don’t want either one of you alone.”
“That’s probably for the best,” I agreed. I hoped that the police would find Richie before he tried anything, but I couldn’t afford to be naïve either. Richie was dangerous. “I’m going to take a few personal days off work.”
“What if you left town for a bit?” Travis suggested. I turned to look at him. “You and Aiden could stay with me.”
“I don’t want to run from my problems,” I frowned, although the idea was enticing.
“It’s not running from your problems, it’s removing yourself from harm’s way,” Travis argued, stepping forward and closing the distance between us. He framed my face with his hands, his eyes searching mine. “It’ll give the police time to find him. Even if it’s just a couple of days.”
“I don’t want to put out your mom.”
“You wouldn’t be, the house is big enough,” he assured me, his lips lifting in a small smile. He was worried. “It’s got a gate and a security system, and cameras overlooking the grounds.”
“We’ll talk about it later,” I murmured, uncomfortable with my brothers watching our exchange. I was indecisive, swaying between wanting to escape for a few days and not wanting Richie to chase me away from my home, my job, and our life here.
Brock left around one o’clock, and Braden reluctantly retreated to the basement shortly thereafter. Braden had to work in the morning and couldn’t afford to take time off, and I’d had to practically throw Brock out. Both seemed wary of leaving me alone, despite my insistence that I was okay.
And I was, for the most part. My heart still raced with fear, and time passed agonizingly slow as I waited for the police to call me.
I kept nodding off on the couch, and I woke up to Travis carrying me to my bedroom. “Stay,” I murmured into his chest, half asleep and completely unwilling to relinquish the warmth of his arms.
“Okay,” he said lowly, brushing his lips across mine tenderly before he broke away to climb into bed with me.
I curled up in his arms, resting my head against his chest. The steady thrum of his heartbeat eased the panicked racing of mine. I couldn’t help breathing him in while he rubbed my back.
“Travis?” I asked.
“Yeah babe?”
“I’m glad you’re here,” I whispered, nestling closer to him as I allowed a few tears to fall. I feared so many things in that moment, but being with him wasn’t one of them—and I wanted him to know that. Usually, I was too busy running scared from how incredible he made me feel. Tonight, something had realigned within me, and I was leaning on him, drawing strength from him, thankful for his presence in my life, instead of denying it or running from it.
“I’ll always be here,” he told me, kissing the top of my head.
Having him there didn’t stop the nightmares, but each time I woke up gasping for air, he was there, chasing them away with his reassuring caresses, and reminding me that I wasn’t alone…making the dark a little less lonely.