Nicolai tore his gaze from the stranger on his couch, ignoring the blizzard that continued to rage outside, then returned his attention to the piece of red alder he’d been carving all morning. As he whittled away, the shape of a bear beginning to form out of the tawny, pliant wood, he found his eyes being drawn yet again to his unexpected guest. He frowned, muttering to himself—which had become an unfortunate result from living alone for so long—and pondered why the young man left him so unsettled. At least the enticing aroma that had drawn him to the man in the first place no longer made him loopy. It had become manageable, as though it was merely a part of him now. He wasn’t sure if that was a good thing.
Ever since the night before when he’d scented the gorgeous creature who had yet to awaken, he’d continued to be plagued by the fact that all was not as it should be in his quiet, shifter world. Even if his wolf had become almost giddy over the interruption to their peaceful life, Nicolai didn’t appreciate the disruption to his ordered existence, the unwelcome lure of something that went beyond the physical. Something dangerous.
And human.
The knife slipped, nicking the side of his thumb. Nicolai held in an aggravated growl as he slid off the table of rough-hewn pine where he’d been perched while he carved. He quickly set down the almost-bear to keep it from being stained by the blood seeping from his small cut. He doubted his sister would appreciate the gift of a bloody toy for his three-year-old nephew’s birthday.
He traveled the few steps to the kitchen area, padding there in his bare feet so he could wash and dress his wound. Stupid. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d made such a blunder. Living a solitary existence in the Alaskan wilderness would be more dangerous if it wasn’t for his accelerated healing abilities. Still, he tended to be careful. He was hardly immortal, and he maintained a distance from his pack. Only his immediate family could convince him—on occasion—to leave the sanctuary he’d built for himself in his beloved woods.
Once he’d cleaned the cut then wrapped a small bandage around it, he returned to his perch. However, he didn’t continue his project. Nicolai rubbed the white scruff that decorated his chin, the color an acknowledgment to his genes rather than age. He was part of a line of rare Russian white wolves and in their pack, only he and his father sported the distinctive blue eyes not found in non-shifter wolves.
The white strands of his hair had also confused many a lover over the years. It wasn’t as bad now that he’d crossed over the midway point of his thirties, but in his early twenties at the University of Alaska? It had been an ongoing conversation-starter. Since rare, white wolf hadn’t seemed like a wise explanation to give to humans—who were clueless about the existence of shifters—he’d played it off as a deliberate bid to convey an edgier look.
I’d say this guy is about ten years younger than me.
Nicolai scrubbed his face at the realization he was staring again, aggravation gnawing at him as he again had the compulsion to wrap himself around the human, to keep him warm by holding him close, their limbs entwined, no barriers to prevent their naked skin from touching—
“Stop it!”
The angry words burst from Nicolai before he could prevent them from being spat out. He sucked in a sharp breath and held it as the man on the couch stirred beneath the pile of wool blankets Nicolai had re-tucked around him that morning. He rose to his feet again then moved toward the sleeping figure, his footsteps soft across the wood floor. When Nicolai reached him, he furrowed his brow, gazing at him carefully to see if his color had improved. The man’s eyes flew open, connecting with his.
Nicolai gasped, straightening as if he’d been prodded. So beautiful. The most amazing pair of amber-colored eyes stared up at him, then blinked a few times before the man’s forehead creased.
“W-what happened? Where am I?”
Even his damn voice is enticing. “Uh, I found you in the blizzard last night. You must have fallen because there’s a sizable lump on the back of your head.”
The man lifted himself on one elbow before groaning then falling against the sofa again. Nicolai’s gut clenched, and he reached for him, but snatched his hand back before he made contact.
What the actual fuck is wrong with me?
His sister teased him for having a heart made of stone, but his bizarre behavior from the moment he’d first detected the scent of this strange human had him questioning his sanity—as well as pissing him off.
Nicolai cleared his throat. “Look, you probably have a concussion. I’ve been keeping an eye on you because we’re stuck here until this storm eases up, but you need to be careful. Rest. No sudden movements.”
The man had covered his eyes with one hand after his failed attempt at rising. “Yeah. I’m thinking that’s excellent advice.” He peeked through his fingers before pulling his hand away. “Thank you, by the way.” He took a seemingly cautious glance at his surroundings. “Is this…is this your place? You brought me here on your own?”
“Yeah.” Nicolai shrugged. “You’re lucky I happened on you when I did.” Smelled you from a mile away in a raging blizzard. Still can’t believe it. “This is one of the worst storms I’ve seen in a while. You never would’ve lasted.”
The man visibly swallowed. “Damn. Thank you again.” He quirked a smile at the corner of his mouth. “Helluva way for me to begin my sabbatical.”
The need to know everything about this man gripped Nicolai but he tamped it down. Whatever was churning inside him, whatever it was that had his wolf so worked up, could wait until the man was feeling better and he himself had better control.
“So, uh, let me get you an ice pack for your head. I think you’ve warmed up enough by now that it’ll be okay.”
His unexpected guest’s features softened. “I appreciate it. I’m Elam, by the way. Elam Goldberg.”
Elam extended his hand and without thinking, Nicolai accepted.
His wolf howled inside, loud and feral as an electric jolt of arousal shot through him from Elam’s touch, from the way his slender fingers curled around Nicolai’s palm, connecting them.
He gripped Elam’s fingers tighter. “Hello, Elam. I’m Nicolai Petrov. But you can call me Nic.” If he shifted at that exact moment, his eyes would be blazing with the inner flame he feared would consume them both. The certainty of what Elam’s presence in his life meant could no longer be denied. It might be crazy—was certainly impossible—but true nonetheless.
I’m your Alpha, Elam. And you’re my mate.
The wolf managed to sneak out a low, rumbling growl, Elam’s eyes widening at what had to be a puzzling sound coming from his rescuer.
And you’re all mine.
Nic yanked his hand back, the action abrupt, but it couldn’t be helped. “I…” He cleared his throat again. “Let me get that ice for you and grab some painkiller as well.”
He felt as if he were babbling. Maybe he’s still so addled from his fall he won’t remember how loony I’m behaving.
Elam regarded him with curiosity, his brow wrinkling. “Yeah. Thank you.”
Nic gave Elam a quick dip of his chin in acknowledgement then set about his task. He took refuge in the fact that the couch faced away from the kitchen area, so he could gather the necessary items without being observed by his house guest. While wrapping a towel around the ice pack, he considered his next move. They were basically stuck together for at least a couple days, maybe more, and with the living space consisting of nothing more than the one large area with the small bedroom and bathroom, they’d be spending plenty of time together.
Elam can have the bedroom.
Of course, he would still have to leave the door open since the only source of heat came from the fireplace. “Shit.” He’d muttered it under his breath as the reality of the circumstances hit him. The size of the cabin had never been an issue before. He spent almost half his time shifted, and when he’d built the place, he’d only ever had himself in mind. Since he couldn’t give his pack an heir, and no one in the Alliance had ever presented as his mate, he’d willingly conceded his position as pack Alpha to his younger brother and made his own life far from the others. He’d always been out, and because he wouldn’t take a female mate just to hang onto his pack-leader status, he’d done what he’d believed was the right thing to do—regardless of how much it had upset his father.
Nic took a deep breath then brought the towel-wrapped ice, glass of water and pain pills to Elam.
“Here you go.” Nic tensed as Elam slowly brought himself upright, worry coursing through him from the slight grimace Elam made. He gave him the tablets and water, unable to make eye contact. Nic scratched the back of his neck as he pondered what to do next. “So… I’m sure you must be hungry. But if your stomach is still a bit iffy, I could heat up some broth. You should lie down, though, and hold the ice to your head for a while.” He glanced at Elam. God, he is so fucking beautiful. And I know nothing about him. What if he already has someone?
Elam placed his glass on the small table next to the couch and smiled weakly. “Thank you. I’m sorry I’m being such a bother.”
Nic dropped his gaze again. “Don’t worry about it. I’m just glad I came along when I did.” He shuddered briefly, the stray thought of Elam, his mate, freezing to death so nearby before he’d rescued him too terrifying to consider.
“I do need to use the restroom, though. Is it through that door?”
Nic tracked the direction Elam was pointing in. “That’s the bedroom, you need to go through there to get to it.”
“Awesome. Thanks.”
As Nic was setting down the ice pack next to Elam’s glass, he noticed him wobbling as he rose from the couch. Elam listed to one side and in an instant Nic was next to him, grabbing him by the waist to keep Elam from tipping over.
Elam grasped Nic’s shoulders and let out a shaky laugh. “Whoa. Got a little dizzy.”
Nic frowned, his worry over Elam’s condition increasing. “Let me see your eyes.”
They locked gazes, and once again Nic was enraptured by Elam’s eyes, flecks of gold within the caramel-colored brown catching the light from the fire, the compulsion to stare until he drowned in them almost impossible to resist.
I need to knock this shit off or else he’s gonna think I’m some sort of creepy stalker.
Elam’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed hard, a tinge of pink highlighting his cheeks. Nic narrowed his eyes. Interesting. Not only didn’t he know whether Elam already had someone, he wasn’t even sure he was gay. He’d like to think that fate wouldn’t be so cruel as to give him a hetero mate, but he and destiny had never gotten along that well. He couldn’t say he’d be all that shocked if it were to be true.
“Um…” Elam swallowed again. “Anything wrong?”
Nic gave a slight shake of his head. “No. You look great. I mean, fine.” Now who’s flushing? “Your eyes seem fine is what I meant, so I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Just rest, like I said.”
Elam removed his hands from Nic’s shoulders as if he’d just realized he’d put them there. “Good, good. That’s a relief.”
Elam lowered his gaze, the awkwardness of the moment still hanging between them. Shit. Nic let go of Elam as well.
“Do you need help getting to the bathroom?”
Elam’s blush deepened. “Oh, no. I can handle it.” He cringed, biting his lip. “I mean, I’m okay.”
Nic stepped out of Elam’s personal space. “I’ll just get that broth ready, then.”
Elam ducked his head and gingerly made his way toward Nic’s bedroom. Nic tore his eyes away, holding in a groan at the unbidden thoughts assaulting his mind, the visual of other reasons for Elam to be entering his bedroom.
And I won’t be forced to sit next to him on the sofa.
Nic decided to put everything on the table for the time being, then allow Elam to indicate if it was a problem when he came back.
“Wow, that smells great.”
Nic had just set down the last dish when Elam entered the room. Nic furrowed his brow. Elam was gripping the top of Nic’s sweatpants to keep them from falling, since they were clearly too big for the slender man. He licked his lips. The waistband had dipped lower on one side with Elam’s hipbone peeking out from the top of the garment.
Jesus.
“I… uh, I didn’t think to mention that I brought in one of your suitcases before it got too crazy out there. I imagine you’d like to change into something that…” Nic looked everywhere but at Elam. “Will stay up.” He shoved his hands in the front pockets of his jeans.
“Yeah.” Elam’s face had pinkened again. “I was wondering how I ended up wearing these, but I guess… I mean, obviously you had to make sure I didn’t freeze. Um, I assume my jeans were wet from the snow?”
Nic ran a hand across the top of his head and nodded. “Had to get you warm. I don’t know how long you laid there on the ground before I found you.”
“Damn.” Elam had muttered under his breath and gone back to being pale. He lifted his gaze. “I can never thank you enough for what you did.”
“It’s cool. Really. I’m just glad I found you before the storm got any worse.” You have no fucking idea how glad. “And, I’m sorry, but when I brought your suitcase inside it fell open, so I had to set a few things that landed in the snow out to dry.” He indicated to the items he’d borrowed after shifting. It had taken him a while to concoct a somewhat plausible story. Telling Elam he’d needed to rifle through his belongings because he was naked hadn’t seemed like such a great explanation.
Elam regarded the clothing that hung from the collapsible clothes-dryer stand Nic used for his own laundry, and at the slippers on the other side of the stone fireplace. “Oh. Huh. Maybe I overstuffed it. It seemed fine when I got off the plane, but I guess it finally gave out.” Elam chuckled as he turned to Nic again. “Man, I’ve been nothing but a hassle for you. First you had to drag me out of the snow, then you got stuck doing the same thing with my clothes.”
Something about being dishonest with Elam ate at him. It wasn’t a horrible lie, but it felt as though he was dishonoring his mate. Don’t go there. Not right now. He sighed. Maybe never. He couldn’t remember the last time one of their Alliance had turned a human. He knew for certain no one had been changed since he’d been born.
“Look, like I said. It’s no problem.” Nic gestured to the table. “I have broth and venison stew. I was thinking you could start with the broth first and see how your stomach handles it before having anything else.” He drew his eyebrows together at the sight of Elam gripping the top of one of the ladderback chairs. “I didn’t mean for you to wait for me. Go on, have a seat.”
Elam gave him a sheepish smile as he pulled the chair out and lowered himself onto it. “I hate feeling this weak, you know? I’m usually pretty active, so I’m not accustomed to how wrecked I feel.”
Nic fought to keep his concentration on Elam’s words instead of his graceful form. “Usually?” He’d tossed the remark over his shoulder as he made his way back to the kitchen.
“Oh, uh, I’ve had a couple challenging months.”
Nic retrieved two glasses of water he’d already poured and brought them back before setting them on the table. “I don’t mean to pry, you know, if it’s not something you wanna talk about.” He placed one glass in front of Elam and the other next to his own plate. Nic sat down and tried not to stare.
Elam gave a light laugh. “I’m not concerned about that so much. More that I doubt it would be very interesting.”
Nic gave the plate of bread a nudge in Elam’s direction. “Try me.”
Elam arched his eyebrows. “Well… I won’t bore you with all the details, but essentially, I broke up with my partner and he…” Elam’s eyes widened as if he realized what he’d let slip. “What I mean…” He rubbed the back of his neck, glancing up in what Nic assumed was his way of checking what Nic’s reaction would be.
Answered both my questions without even knowing it. I’d say I’m pretty damn thrilled. Nic thought he’d take Elam out of his misery and reassure him he hadn’t fucked up. After all, being alone and injured in a homophobe’s cabin out in the middle of nowhere with a snowstorm raging outside would be quite an alarming situation for the young man to find himself in.
“Was it a mutual break-up, if you don’t mind my asking?”
Elam blinked a few times, then sighed. “No. He wanted us to stay together as long as I didn’t mind all the guys he was seeing on the side.”
Nic’s wolf hackles rose. “Asshole. How dare he do that to you.”
A slow grin spread across Elam’s face. “Funny. That’s how I felt about it too.”
They both chuckled for a bit then Nic gestured for Elam to eat. While Elam sipped the broth from his spoon, occasionally dipping the corner of his bread in the liquid before taking a bite, he talked a bit about his work as a nature photographer. Nic could imagine the long, lanky man with shaggy auburn hair skimming his shoulders, those amber eyes framing a patrician nose that sported a slight bump as if it had once been broken, and a mouth that split into a wide smile that showcased straight, white teeth—could envision him in the wild with a camera in his hand. Nic examined him further. Elam’s jaw and upper lip carried at least a few days of stubble and it looked damn sexy on him. A smattering of freckles decorated his nose and forehead, and even though he was light-skinned, Nic didn’t doubt those freckles would show up stronger when Elam was outdoors for any length of time.
“What made you choose Alaska, or should I say, this neck of the woods?” Nic snorted. “There’s plenty of nature to photograph, but not much else.”
Elam wiped his lips then set the napkin down next to his bowl. “Which is perfect.” He scrunched his brow and folded his arms, leaning on the table. Elam seemed to be carefully considering what he was about to say. “I needed to get away from Seattle, the city in particular. Yeah, Andy was a big part of that, but I’ve never liked living in any city. It’s not my thing. I wanted it to work with him, so I convinced myself I could enjoy the outdoors on my weekend hikes or on assignment, so he could live in the type of environment he preferred.” Elam rolled his eyes. “What he was really enjoying was the buffet of men available.”
Nic wanted to punch Andy. “So… you’re not going back to Seattle at the end of your stay?” That was subtle. But he had to know.
Elam gave a one-shouldered shrug. “Not for good, if I go at all. I don’t have a place there anymore and I stuck my bigger things in storage, but that’s it.” Elam sighed. “No, wherever I end up, it’ll be because I want to be there.”
Nic had to fight himself to keep from prodding Elam some more—especially since he wasn’t sure he’d ever reveal who he truly was to him. If I ever take things beyond having met my mate once before I die.
Elam tilted his head. “What about you? Have you lived here long?”
It was time to fall back on his ‘safe for public consumption’ history. “My whole life. My family’s not too far away, but I like being out here on my own.”
At Elam’s puzzled expression, he realized how that might have sounded.
“I meant my father, brother, sister, niece and nephew. That family. I’m not…” Nic carded his fingers through his close-cropped hair. “I’m not with anybody.” He tried not to cringe.
Elam lowered his eyes, ducking his chin, a tendril of hair drifting across one eye and Nic wondered how long he could hold out before jumping his mate. Taking him in the way I know he needs it. Nic swallowed down a predatory growl before it could escape.
“You must really love it here.” Elam fiddled with the crumpled napkin, his movements speaking of his nervousness. “I know I would. I searched through a lot of listings and areas before I decided on this one. I wanted somewhere as close to paradise as possible, so I could have a clear head while I started fresh.” He straightened, a smile dancing on his lips. “I can’t wait to see it when the storm is over. I bet it’s majestic.”
Nic smiled back. “Majestic. Yeah, that’s a great way to describe it. We seem to be on the same page.”
Maybe in more ways than one?