Resolution: Free Fall (A Resolution Pact Short Story) by Fiona Starr (5)

The radio signal was like a lightning bolt on a perfect sunny day. It tore the moment from us and that was that.

Ben and I step outside and walk to the edge of the airfield, our eyes skyward. The wind has picked up a little, and I hug my coat around me. He stands in his jumpsuit and doesn’t seem at all affected by the cold.

He points up to the sky, a little east of us. “They’re in free fall for the first minute, then you’ll see their chutes open.”

We stand there, watching, until one by one, four bright red chutes appear one after the other in a cluster. I have a hard time processing that that’s Cassie and Evan and Lindsay and Pete. The sight takes my breath away.

“They are up so high.” I can’t look away as my four friends descend from the impossible height. “Is it very loud?”

Swoop appears with a tennis ball in his mouth and sits at Ben’s side. Ben takes the ball and throws it into the field, in the opposite direction of the jumpers. Swoop takes off.

Ben nods. “The wind is pretty intense when you’re in free fall, but once you open your chute, everything feels quiet and smooth. You glide down slow and get to enjoy the view.” He’s watching the four red chutes circle in the setting sun. “It’s just you and the clear blue sky. There’s really nothing else like it.”

I watch his face and realize he really loves this.

Evan touches down first. He seems to glide across the grass and places hit feet down in a gentle jog and then gets to work picking up his chute. Then the others land with their tandem instructors who skip across the grass on their feet but they look more like unwieldy geese the way they are strapped to each other.

Cassie disengages her buckles, detaching herself from her tandem instructor and runs over to me, whooping. Her cheeks are red from the wind and the cold, and her eyes are alive with the intensity of the jump. “Jules! You have to go up. You have to! I can’t wait to do it again!” She hugs me and then touches the back of my head. “How are you feeling?”

“Much better. I am sorry I missed it.”

“You’re not mad that we went without you?” Cassie asks.

I shake my head and glance over at Ben. He’s watching Evan. “Not at all. I would have felt awful if I’d ruined the whole day.”

The others arrive and the energy coming off them is palpable.

Evan high fives Ben. “Man, I have to make more time for this! Every single jump is better than the last one!”

Cassie sidles up to Evan and puts her arm around his waist. “I’d love to do it again. And Jules still needs to go.”

“How’s your head, Jules?” Lindsay asks.

Pete nods. “Yeah, you feeling better?”

“Much better, thanks,” I say.

Brent smiles. “Sorry we left you alone for so long. Did Ben take good care of you while we were gone?”

Ben glances at me and winks, speaking before I can. “Oh, I took care of her all right. I can think of worse ways to spend an afternoon.” His smile is wolf-like, predatory and cold.

He may as well have slapped me I am so stunned. Is his wise crack compensating for the lie? Or is he really being a prick and sending me a message that this was a one-and-done? I can’t tell. I’m not sure what to say.

I know it’s not like we’re getting married or anything; I don’t know what I expect. But I can still feel him on my skin. I can still taste him in my mouth. The time we spent talking and caressing, the things we said… all of it is still echoing in my mind and he’s cracking jokes? I feel sick to my stomach.

Cassie puts her arms over my shoulder and squeezes me to her. “You look a little pale. Maybe you need to eat?”

I smile at her and let her lead me into the office while everyone says their goodbyes. “Yeah, I am sure I just need to eat something.”

Evan jangles his keys and unlocks his SUV for us. “Ben, we’re going grab some food, want to join us?”

He’s walking away as he talks. He can’t get out of here fast enough. “No man, I have some work to do here before I can leave.” He doesn’t even look my way.

Later on, we are sitting around the table at a burger place and I can’t take it any longer. When the conversation comes back to skydiving, I try to remain casual. “So what’s the deal with Ben? Is he single?”

Cassie laughs. “He’s single all right.”

Evan leans back in his chair and shakes his head. “Don’t get me wrong, Jules. I love the guy like a brother. I’ve known him since forever. But he’s not relationship material.”

Something about how he says it makes me curious. “What do you mean?”

Cassie rubs Evan’s chest. “What he means is Ben’s a horn dog.”

Disappointment lands in my belly. I push my food away. I feel like a fool.

Evan slides his chair forward and leans his elbows on the table. “No, it’s not like that. He’s a good guy. A really good guy. He’s got an awesome family. I’d give him a kidney if he needed one. But he got burned once by a girl and he never really bounced back, you know? So he dates and stuff, but… he’s…”

Cassie finishes his sentence. “But he’s a horn dog. A total player.”

Evan sighs in defeat. Cassie won’t let him sugar coat anything. “Sorry, I wouldn’t want you to get hurt, Jules.”

I lie awake in my bed, my head spinning with thoughts of Jules. It’s not just the mind-blowing sex that’s got me, it’s more than that; it’s her. She’s not like the girls I usually hook up with. I don’t even like calling what we did hooking up—it feels dirty and she’s better than that.

I don’t remember the drive home from the airfield, or taking a shower, or anything after she left. It’s like something in my brain hit pause and replay and all I can do is think about her.

She told me she’s a kindergarten teacher and she loves her kids. She told me about growing up in the mountains and about college back east. She seemed more concerned with her friends having a good time at the airfield than her own injury. And she never once harshed on skydiving—which is a thing a lot of people do—even though it was clear she was relieved to miss the jump today.

Some dumbasses make jokes about jumping out of perfectly good airplanes—ha ha ha, like they are so clever and skydiving is beyond their comprehension. They don’t get it and they don’t want to. They also don’t see how disrespectful it is to slam what we do. But Jules didn’t do that; she was obviously afraid to jump, but never once did she say anything that made it like she was better than those who did.

I know that if I can get her up there, she’d see it. She’d get it, and she’d be hooked. Shit—what am I thinking? No strings, man. That’s the rule.

Swooper whines and shuffles to the door, his leash in his mouth. I don’t remember walking him when I got home. Damn, I’m in a fog over this girl. I slide out of bed and pull on my jeans and hoodie and make my way to the door. I step into my boots and snap Swooper’s leash onto his collar.

“Sorry, boy. I think I forgot about you.”

He wags his tail so hard his entire body waggles. He races through the open door and tugs me to the sidewalk where he relieves himself like he’s been waiting all day.

“Dude. I am so sorry.”

I pull out my phone and text Evan.

I can imagine the conversation going on at this moment between Cassie and Evan, debating whether to give me Jules’ number. It’s no secret I have a reputation and I have earned every bit of it. But maybe this is different.

I blow into my fists as Swooper does his business and we hurry back inside. I’m back in bed and staring at the ceiling, wondering what the hell I am going to do to get Jules out of my head so I can sleep.

The next day I wake up and find myself checking my phone every other minute for a reply back from Evan. Come on, man. This isn’t funny. I go through the morning motions and get dressed and take Swoop for a run. It’s almost ten o’clock before it hits me: I don’t need Evan to give me Jules’ number. She filled out the waivers at the office. I have everything I need to reach her right on my desk.

I run home and feed Swoop and hop in the shower. I’m dressed and in the car by ten thirty and Swoop can feel my excitement. I remember how my dog barreled Jules over at the airfield yesterday and I can’t help but laugh.

“There’s something about her, buddy, right? You saw it first.”

Swoop wags his tail and sticks his head out the window as I turn onto the main road to the airfield.

Evan calls on the way. I slip my earbuds in and answer the call.

“Hey man.”

“Hey Ben, I asked Jesse for Jules’ number, and… I don’t know man. Cassie didn’t want to give it to me. She says she loves you but Jules is her girl, you know?”

I shake my head and ignore any hard feelings. I know I deserve this. “Yeah. I get it. But she’s different, man. She isn’t just any girl.”

Evan laughs. “That’s exactly what Cassie said. Hey, you’re like a brother to me. I didn’t want to leave you hanging, but I can’t help you with this one. Cassie’s not letting me near her phone.”

“Don’t worry about it. I appreciate the call.” Even though it stings hearing this shit from my oldest friend. “You going to come jump again soon?”

“Cassie’s birthday is next month. I got her lessons. She’s going to flip!”

Well, if they won’t trust me with Jules, I guess it’s still something that they aren’t cutting me out. “That’s awesome, man. She really seemed to dig flying. Talk to you later.”

“Later.”

I pull into the airfield and swing into my parking spot. Swoop is on the ground as soon as I open the door, racing off to see Shelly, who always gives him treats. I hurry into my office and check the papers on my desk.

“Shit.” They’re gone. I realize that Shelly would have taken them and scanned the waivers and filed the original paper first thing. I jiggle the mouse on my laptop and wait for the screen to wake up.

I pull up the client database and search for “Jules”. Nothing comes up. I stare at my screen and think for a second before dialing Shelly’s desk.

“Hey, Ben. Didn’t know you were in.”

“Yeah, I just got here. Hey, did you grab the paperwork from the clients I processed yesterday?”

“Evan and his friends? Yeah, it’s already processed and in the system. Got it all done this morning.”

“All right. Thanks, Shelly.”

“You bet.”

I hang up and stare at my screen and it dawns on me: Jules is a nickname. She wouldn’t have used it on a legal waiver. I type “Julie” into the search. Nothing. Shit! What could her name be?

I sit there another moment before I remember I can search the records by date. I pull up the waivers from yesterday and the list populates. There she is. Julianne Wilson.

Julianne. Jules.

I click on her name and her information appears. I have her address, her phone number, her place of work, and an overwhelming sense of dread.

What if she doesn’t want to hear from me? What if she knows about my reputation from Cassie? Evan wouldn’t have let it sound all bad, would he? What the hell am I doing? Reality checks in and I tell myself that Jules knows how to reach me at the airfield office, right? Right. So… maybe I need to chill on the stalker vibe and take a breath.

I close the database and run my hands through my hair. I need to get her out of my head.

Fuck.

I grab my gear and radio for the next plane to see if they have room for one more.

Nothing like blue skies to clear Jules out of my head.