Junction, Ohio
“Congratulations! I have the great pleasure of informing you of your admission to Kent State University for the Fall 2017 semester.”
“Shocking!” Tawny feigned interest as she dipped a soggy fry into a mountain of ketchup.
Kit understood her disinterest. It was no secret that he would be getting into a lot of the places he’d applied. He did work his ass off, though, and he felt he deserved it.
“So,” she continued. “That’s LSU, Ohio State, and now Kent State. Have you opened your Harvard letter yet?”
Kit smirked as he reached for the next envelope in his pile. “I read online that the gay community thrives at Harvard. They never would’ve accepted me, though. Not nearly enough extracurriculars, and I would’ve been too nervous to have a decent interview.”
“Sure, they wouldn’t have!” Tawny played along with an eyeroll. “You have a 7.0 GPA for crying out loud. I don’t think there’s a school on this earth that would tell you no. Do you want my turkey sandwich?”
“Hard pass,” Kit answered.
This was proving to be a bigger deal to him than it was to his best friend, but he and Tawny had been planning this day since their sophomore year. They were going to come to school with all their college responses and open them together. Things were a lot different back then, though. Tawny was the thin, pimple-faced redhead with the messy French braids, oversized clothes, and colorful braces. Kit was the slim, pimple-faced gay kid who got As in every class and barely spoke to anyone but her.
Not only was he the only out kid in school, but he was the only out person in their entire town. It wasn’t easy. Homophobes came in all shapes and sizes in Junction, Ohio. Most kept quiet with their hatred nowadays, but there were a few at Wilson High School who went out of their way to remind Kit just how insignificant he was as often as possible.
Being best friends with the boy with social leprosy couldn’t have been easy either, but Kit was grateful for Tawny. She was there for him when some asshole kept tagging “FAG” on Kit’s locker, and the time when a photoshopped picture of him in lady’s lingerie circulated the school blog. He was there for Tawny every time she cried about the “flat-chested” jokes, the “ginger” jokes, and the “fag hag” jokes, too. High School was nothing like the ‘80s movies that aired late nights on ABC. High School sucked.
Tawny was the one that promised Kit they’d get into great schools and out of Junction, Ohio, once and for all. Kit was skeptical at first – no one from Junction really left. His parents’ parents were raised there by their parents. It was that type of small town. But Tawny insisted.
“There’s a world out there that we have to see,” she’d say. “A world where you can be yourself, and I can meet a nice boy who doesn’t remember the time I puked on Amy Stanton during PE freshman year. That’s the world we’re going to live in.”
Then, junior year came.
Tawny tried out for – and actually made the cheerleading squad. Kit tried to convince her that it was some ploy to ruin her even more. You know how teens could be; pretend to invite you into their circle and then embarrass you even further just when you let your guard down. But luckily, that wasn’t the case. Puberty served her well enough to be one of the mighty Tigresses. She had her braces removed over the summer, and her boobs had grown to a solid C cup. The point guard for the Tigers asked her on a date and the rest was history. Tawny had become pro-Junction, Ohio.
“Dude,” one of the stoner kids that Kit and Tawny had the misfortune of sharing a table with spoke up, gesturing to his lunch tray. “You may not want her turkey sandwich, but I feel like you’d want this.”
His friends all laughed. Kit stared at the hot dog being offered to him by the worthless idiot and turned to face him.
“You know, Dwayne, I can’t tell if you do this joke every time they serve hot dogs here because you’re too burnt out to remember you did it a week before, or because you’re secretly hoping I shove it up your ass. Leave. Me. Alone.”
Tawny watched the stoners slowly start to lose their smiles with a grin of her own. “Uh oh. I think you hit the nail on the head, Kit…”
“Whatever, dude. It was just a fucking joke.”
“A joke that needs to stop,” he said.
Kit had changed quite a bit, too. What was once a lanky, awkward teenager had now become the well-kept, blond-haired, broad-shouldered 17-year-old who caused girls to do a double take when he walked past. They’d eventually look away in disappointment when they realized it was just the gay guy. He was a bit prettier and better coordinated, but he was still the Gay Guy.
Oh, and he wasn’t the kid that sat back and let people say just anything to him anymore. It got him in trouble from time to time, but standing up for himself was worth the trouble.
Even though Tawny and Kit remained close, she began to better fit in with the groups of people who’d previously been shunning them. Getting out of Junction wasn’t as high on Tawny’s priority list anymore. Instead, she was looking forward to going to Ohio State University with most everyone from Wilson High. He didn’t blame her for it. Kit got into OSU, too, and he’d probably stick around with her if people treated him like he existed.
His plans hadn’t changed at all. There was nothing for him in Ohio. Tawny wanted to stay, and that was fine. They had Facebook, text messaging, and video chatting to help them keep in touch. Besides, he could visit her when he came back to see his dad during holiday breaks.
That was if his dad decided to let him go away for college.
The problem was, his father didn’t exactly know he was applying to all of these schools outside of Ohio. His father was all for him going to a liberal school and meeting a nice boy, as long as that liberal school wasn’t more than 100 miles or so away.
If Kit was able to go away for college, his dad would be the only thing bringing him back to Junction. There was a whole world out there for him to see – a world outside the Midwest that included other queer people, and those who were tolerant of them. That was the world Kit wanted to experience.
“A yes from Boston University as well. That could work.” Kit put the letter aside and reached for the second to last one. “This one’s from UCLA. I figured maybe my dad would budge if I got in because he loves the Trojans.”
Tawny’s face changed completely as she pushed her lunch tray away. She stared down at the envelope. “The Bruins, you mean?”
“Whatever their names are.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you were applying to UCLA? I would’ve made you open that one first, Kit. Hot weather, hot babes, beautiful beaches… need I go on?”
Kit pushed the bleached-blond locks out of his face before carefully opening the envelope. They both knew UCLA wasn’t an option. His father would rather wear a green wig for a year than let his son travel clear across the country and live there. Kit understood why – they were all each other had nowadays, and after the bullying he’d endured when people first realized he was different, his dad became extremely overprotective. There wasn’t a way for him to hover if Kit lived 2,500 miles away.
“Read it!” Tawny demanded. Kit could practically see the palm trees in her eyes.
“One moment, Mother.” He unfolded the paper and scanned the page for a few seconds. “Dear Christopher: Congratulations! It is our great pleasure to offer you admission to UCLA for the Fall Quarter 2017. You have been admitted –”
“UCLA?” a deep voice interrupted. “Sweet.”
Kit stopped midsentence to find Paulie Madison standing across from him at their lunch table. Paulie was the quarterback for the school’s football team and only came around to flirt with Tawny on occasion. If anyone came around Kit, it was because they wanted to talk to Tawny. He looked from the muscular brunette and his annoying, dreamy smile, over to his best friend who was seconds away from drooling over him.
Paulie was dangerous for two reasons:
- He was attractive.
- He knew it.
A third reason could be that he treated Kit like an actual human being – unlike his teammates – but Kit knew it was because Paulie wanted to get in Tawny’s pleated skirt. Kit suspected his best friend was the only girl on the squad who hadn’t invited him into her bed yet. He was proud of her.
“Kit got into almost every school in the country,” Tawny all but purred.
“That’s not even a little bit true,” Kit said. His voice was shaky so he cleared his throat, ignoring the way the quarterback smiled at him.
Paulie did seem impressed, though, even if he was feigning interest for Tawny’s sake. He watched as Kit began to gather his letters, putting them away. “Well, UCLA is a big deal. I’m guessing you’re ditching OSU?”
And suddenly this guy was interested in his life? Kit had half a mind to tell him to pretend he wasn’t there like everyone else did and just talk to Tawny, but he shrugged off the question to continue packing his things away. He saved the Parsons School of Design response for last. The fashion industry was always something Kit considered going into, but he figured his father would say it was more of a hobby than a career.
Paulie glanced in Tawny’s direction and stepped a little closer. “The two of you should come and celebrate at my party tomorrow night,” he said, fixing his Wilson Letterman jacket as he looked between the two of them. “I needed a reason to throw a party since my parents are going to Toledo for a couple days. It’s a seniors only thing and… you two are seniors, so…” he trailed off with a forced laugh that Tawny grinned at in response.
Kit fought not to roll his eyes. He never went to any of the sports teams’ parties and he wasn’t going to start now. Hell, he never went to any parties. Everyone knew what happened to the outcasts when they showed up at the popular kids’ shindigs. Mathelete Molly Trevor was pushed into the pool by Paulie’s ex-girlfriend in junior year just for shits and giggles. The Science Club President, Angel Rivera, ended up leaving in nothing but his boxers at one of the parties thrown by the hockey team. The list went on. It was a list that Kit was intent on not joining.
“I’ll be there!” Tawny said, her Cheshire grin threatening to split her freckled-face apart.
Paulie gave her a wink before turning to look at Kit. Kit zipped his backpack and slid it on one arm at a time, hoping to be saved by the bell.
“…And what about you?” Paulie asked.
Kit glanced up, slightly confused. “What about me?”
Paulie chuckled, though he was starting to look a little uncomfortable. Kit hoped the boy’s teammates wouldn’t follow him over and start problems. It’d been a peaceful Tuesday and he wanted to keep it that way.
“Well, I was hoping you’d come. To my party,” Paulie repeated. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his Wrangler jeans and bit his lip. “Tomorrow night…”
“I have something to do tomorrow night,” Kit said.
Tawny guffawed at the statement. “Pft. Like what?”
“Things.”
“I’ve been inviting you to all of my parties this year, Edwards,” Paulie said. He seemed serious now. Kit wondered if he was supposed to feel bad as the quarterback continued. “I know you don’t exactly care about me or my teammates, and trust me, I don’t blame you at all. It’d just be cool to see you there. We’ll probably never see each other after high school, anyway. I hear you’re getting into every school in the country…”
Kit was smiling, and he didn’t know why he was smiling. It wasn’t a big smile, but it was on his face. Truthfully, he wanted nothing more than to disappear right now, but it was hard to look away from Paulie. He was that good looking. Chocolaty brown hair, bright blue eyes, soft features and a gorgeous smile. Kit wasn’t even going to get started on his body. Despite all of that, he wasn’t going to be played for a fool. He was still Kit Edwards, Junction’s resident Gay Guy. There was nothing for him at a high school party full of idiotic, horny, straight kids.
“I, um… I appreciate your offer, but I’m not much of the party type –”
“We’ll be there!” Tawny interrupted. “Is 8:00 okay?”
Paulie began to back away with that wide, gorgeous grin on his face. “It’s perfect. See you tomorrow!”
“Yes, you will!” Tawny continued to wave well after Paulie had turned away and returned to the football team’s lunch table. “What should we wear?” she asked.
The bell rang and Kit fixed his face, standing to his feet with a sigh. “I’m not sure what just happened, but I’m not going to any party tomorrow night.”
“Oh, you’re going,” Tawny answered. Her tone was reminiscent of the one his mother would use on him around bedtime. “We are both going. You’re going to experience a party with people our age, maybe have a beer, dance with me, and you’re going to have a fantastic time.”
The cafeteria slowly began to empty out as Kit waited for Tawny. He caught the eyes of Paulie as the Tigers exited in a pack, passing the football between each other and being as loud and obnoxious as they always were. Paulie smiled at him for what had to be a couple seconds before turning and joining the madness.
“If they don’t want Kit Edwards in their locker room, they’re not going to want him at their stupid party. You can go, Tawny.” Kit watched her dump her half-empty tray as he shouldered his bag. “I can tell you two like each other. I’ll be at home with Dad as he watches a stupid sport show and I read through my Vogue. Our typical Wednesday.”
“Or…” Tawny began to gather her red hair into a ponytail. “You can come to this one party with your best friend? It does get exhausting hanging out with Sarah and Jess after about 15 minutes. You don’t even have to stay if you don’t want to.”
Kit let out a long, exaggerated breath as they neared their 2nd floor math class.
“Paulie said it best himself. He’s been inviting you to parties all year –”
“And I’m saying no for a reason, Tawny. You know that better than anyone.”
Tawny was quiet. Quiet Tawny meant that all of this was going in one ear and out the other.
“Listen; I’m happy that you’re getting along with these people. I’m happy that you’re a Tigress and that you’ve dated a basketball player, and that your boobs grew. But they like you. They don’t give a damn about me.”
She stopped walking in the hall, only slightly annoyed when a freshman boy bumped into her. He scurried off with a muffled apology after her death glare.
“These people would think you’re fun too if you lightened up a little.”
Kit was rarely late to class, but this felt like a conversation worth having. “I’m sorry? Lightened up a little? You do know I was the kid who had FAG written on his locker not once, but twice, right Tawny?”
Her face fell slightly. “Two years ago, Kit. Sure, people can be dicks, but Principal Chambers has made some serious changes around here. It’s much more tolerable.”
That made him hold his tongue. It seemed tolerable because he’d gone from being the best friend of dweeby Tawny, to being the best friend of popular cheerleader Tawny. It didn’t hurt that he was six feet tall now and looked down at most of the student body, either. But there was nothing tolerable about 95% of Junction treating him like he had an infectious disease.
“I’ll ask my dad.”
Tawny pouted. “He’ll say no.”
“Exactly.” He took her hand and dragged her up the flight of stairs as the late bell sounded. “We have a class to get to.”
??
Kit watched his father dump the rest of the pork lo mein onto his paper plate. He’d been trying for the past hour to bring up the fact that he applied to four different schools besides the three the man knew about, but he couldn’t exactly find the words.
“My son’s going to be a Buckeye! I can’t tell you how excited I am.”
Especially after he said things like that…
“You know, your mom was the one with all the smarts. Thank God for Angie. She’d be so proud of you, bud.” Matthew Edwards smiled at his son before reaching for the pint of broccoli. “You should’ve opened the Kent State one with your old man instead of Tawny. You spoil her.”
Kit smiled back, pushing the food around his plate. “I’m sorry about that. It used to be a big deal between her and I… but you’re right. I should’ve involved you more.”
“It’s no issue now. So, what’re you thinking? OSU?”
Kit shrugged at the question. “I don’t know, really.”
Matthew looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “Kent State probably has a better fashion program if you’re still into that. I don’t even know what you want to do anymore.”
That was the question. Kit wasn’t sure what he wanted either, but he knew he wanted to get away. “I’m still stuck between social work and going into fashion like most boys my age.”
His father laughed. “Maybe the whole fashion design could be a minor, then?”
“Maybe.” Kit waited for his father to finish chewing before he continued. “I um – UCLA has a pretty good psychology program, you know. If I did go the social work route, that’d be a good option.”
Matthew hummed in response. “The UCLA that’s across the country?”
(1) friend request
Kit looked down at his cell phone. It wasn’t often he got a notification for a friend request on Facebook. He was already friends with everyone on there he somewhat liked, and that wasn’t many.
“Uh, yeah. That’s the one,” he answered.
His dad put the fork down, and in the Edwards’ household, that was a big deal. They looked at one another before Kit assumed his father realized he wasn’t saying anything more.
“It’s kind of late to reply to UCLA now. February and all.”
Kit swallowed around the lump in his throat and offered a forced smile. About that…
“I may’ve already applied and heard back from them,” he said. “And LSU. Um, and Boston University. Parsons School of Design, too.”
His father gave him a blank stare.
Kit reached for his phone and shrugged. “I used money I save up to pay for all the application fees. Sketched a few designs for Parsons. I figured it would be good to have options, right? Experiencing college away from Ohio appealed to me after everything I grew up seeing in Junction, and I don’t know. I guess I just wanted the option.”
New friend request: Paulie Madison
Kit stared at the screen as if it’d correct itself. There was no way he was seeing that properly.
“Interesting,” Matthew answered.
He was quiet for the next minute or so, and Kit acknowledged that a “You’re staying in Ohio,” would most likely be what left his dad’s mouth next.
“It would’ve been nice if you told me you wanted to apply outside the state instead of throwing all of this on me now.”
Kit nodded. “You’re absolutely right. I just – I didn’t think you’d be okay with it. I thought maybe if I got the acceptances first that we could talk about it?”
Matthew went back to eating.
Kit turned his attention back to his phone. This whole going away for college thing seemed to be a lost cause. He checked the profile to see if it was actually Paulie Madison and not some weirdo trying to catfish him. It looked legit – photos, melodramatic posts about football and team spirit, several mutual friends – the whole nine. Kit wondered if Paulie added him by mistake, but that’d be weird. That’d mean Paulie was on his Facebook page stalking and accidentally hit the request option.
Weird.
“I think I’m going to go upstairs and shower,” Kit said.
Matthew shoveled some of the lo mein into his mouth and answered around a grunt. “Fine. Come by the shop after school tomorrow and we’ll talk about your options some more.”
Kit stood up and nodded. He wondered if this discussion would be a discussion, or more of a decision on his father’s part. “Alright.”
He headed out of the dining room before his father could say anything more. Once in his room, he approved the friend request. Kit wasn’t sure what he expected to come of this. Maybe Paulie really wanted in Tawny’s pants and thought that the best way to accomplish that was to be nice to her weirdo best friend.
Before he could look too far into things, Kit decided he’d actually get in the shower. He stripped off his t-shirt and rifled through his messy drawers for something to change into when a Facebook notification sounded again.
New message: Paulie Madison
Kit opened the app and approached with caution.
[Paulie] Thanks for accepting me, Mr. UCLA. I thought for sure you’d hit deny. ??
And if Kit wasn’t skeptical before reading the message, he was skeptical now. What the heck was going on?
Maybe he’d been hacked.
[Paulie] Just to reassure you about tomorrow (because I can totally tell you weren’t into it) you don’t have to hang out where all the guys will be. I know they’re assholes and… well I don’t want the one time you do come hang out to end with you upset.
[Paulie] We can chill in my basement. I’ve got movies and it won’t be so loud down there. I told Tawny the same thing. In case you’re weirded out.
“Slightly,” Kit said to himself. He walked over to his bed and sat down. None of this was making sense. For the past four years, it’d been him and Tawny. He loved her, but being a third wheel to her future relationship/booty call wasn’t on his plans for the week.
[K] Um. Thanks.
He hit send and flopped back against the bed. This had to be a set up. Nothing physically harmful had happened since a few guys shoved Kit around in his sophomore year, but c’mon. A football player was inviting him over to his party. They were going to hang out in a safe place away from everyone else? Yeah. He wasn’t stupid. He’d go down into that basement and get his ass kicked.
[Paulie] Yeah? Cool. I figured you weren’t coming to the other parties because it’d be weird with the guys around. And with Tawny’s friends, too.
[K] That, and parties just aren’t my scene. I never had a shit ton of friends to party with. This is Kit Edwards you’re talking to…
There was a long pause before a response, but eventually the three dots showed up on the messenger indicating that Paulie was typing.
[Paulie] I know.
Maybe I can extend an olive branch and show you I’m nothing like them. I don’t treat people the way that my friends do. And I would like to hang before we all go our separate ways. ??
Kit took a deep breath as he read through the conversation again.
[K] So you’d just sneak me into the basement? How would that even work without people thinking I was forcing you down there to molest you?
[Paulie] Don’t say that.
[Paulie] They’ll be drunken idiots by 9:30. We can just disappear…
[Paulie] If you want to. And Tawny can come if you’d like. I don’t mind.
Of course you don’t mind, Kit thought. He was trying to get with her after all. Still, something wasn’t adding up. He didn’t understand where he fit into all of this.
[Paulie] I’ve gotta eat dinner. See you tomorrow :)
Kit sat up, dragging a hand down his face. Whatever. At least if something did happen on tomorrow night and he ended up getting hurt, he’d have evidence in the form of this conversation.
??
It was the day of the party and the school day dragged like a bitch. Kit hated to admit it, but he was sort of stressing out about everything. Most of his peers were pros at this already. It was senior year. They’d been going to parties throughout high school. Kit – not so much.
To make matters worse, it seemed like Kit was seeing Paulie in the halls more often. They must’ve made eye contact around 10 times that morning, which was 10 times more than usual. Paulie also sat directly behind Kit in Chemistry when usually they were on opposite sides of the room. Kit may’ve been playing this up in his head, but he knew he wasn’t wrong.
Tawny was excited about it, naturally.
“He wants to hang out downstairs?” she asked; her eyes as wide as saucers.
Kit nodded like it should’ve been obvious. “Didn’t you two have this discussion already? He said you knew about it.”
“I haven’t spoken to him since yesterday. Hm. Maybe he wants to surprise me and make a move!” Tawny grinned so hard it hurt Kit’s face. “You know I’ve had a crush on him since third grade. This has been a long time in the making.”
That was true. At least Tawny had good taste. “I get it, I just don’t know why I have to be there. If you two start making out with me in the room –”
“We’ll behave.” She laughed as they made their way to her RAV4. “I’ll behave. But I must say, I’m excited to have you finally join me at a party. The parties I’ve been to aren’t even that bad! Oh – especially Paulie’s parties. There’s always tons of booze thanks to his older cousins, and his house is amazing.”
Kit shrugged. That didn’t appeal to him. He just wanted to know that he’d leave this thing in one piece. “I’m going to help my dad out at the shop. He wants to talk about all the places I applied and why I didn’t tell him before yesterday.”
“Uh oh.” The girl dug around in her bag for her car keys as she grimaced. “Have fun with that. I’m sure he’ll hear you out, though. Mr. Edwards has always been good about being in your corner, Kit.”
“We’ll see.” Kit looked around the school parking lot. Everyone was buzzing over the party later on, as per usual. “I’ll pick you up around 8?”
“Sounds good!” Tawny hugged him much harder than she ever had, and Kit playfully rolled his eyes as he reciprocated.
Tonight was either going to be okay, or the worst night of his life. Only time would tell.