Takoda greeted us at the door like we'd been gone weeks, not a few hours. "Come with me to run her."

"Okay."

He snagged the leash off the hook, and we took Takoda down to the park around the corner. The amber streetlamps elongated our shadows on the sidewalk as Takoda sniffed her pee-mail in the bushes.

The minimal champagne I'd consumed at the wedding was enough to give me courage. "Why do men like boobs so much?"

He chuckled. "Don't know."

"Yolanda has big ones, and she shows them off."

He unhooked Takoda's leash, and lobbed one of her Kong chew toys off into the darkness. She bolted off like a rocket. We kept walking on the sidewalk.

"They're not real, ya know."

"What? Her boobs? They're fake?"

He nodded and glanced at my chest.

"Does Diesel like that?"

"Diesel's first two wives had a similar body type."

"This is his third marriage? So Diesel goes around marrying women with big fake boobs?"

"Could be."

"He does seem like he's in love with her. For more than just her boobs."

"You'd have to ask him that."

My curiosity over Tori gnawed at my insides, especially after I'd shared my secrets with him tonight. "Did you date Cyan's friend Tori?"

Rogan's pace slowed, and he angled his chin toward me. "Why do you ask?"

"She's pretty. Worldly. Mature. Carries herself with grace and composure." All the things I'm not.

Takoda bounded back to us with her Kong gripped in her teeth, her tongue lolling out the side. He hooked her leash, and we took her home.

As he removed his jacket and manned the alarm, I took off my sweater as I walked toward the bedroom. "Goodnight. Thank you for taking me. I loved it."

"Hold on a second."

I froze. "What?"

He stepped over to the couch and sat down. "Come here. Need to talk to you." He patted the cushion next to him.

"Oh, okay." As I sat down, our knees bumped and a frisson sparked between us like it did every time we touched.

"Don't compare yourself to other women."

He slung an arm over the back of the couch. "Know what makes you beautiful? Your stormy blue eyes, long fucking legs that'd drive any man to murder, hair for miles, fine ass, round, full boobs—to use your word. I could go on for days about your lips."

"Oh." Wow.

He lowered his head, and his hand cupped my neck. "But who you are defines your beauty. Not many women out there can say she's survived growin' up the way you did and came out the other side looking like a million bucks, givin' smiles to everyone she meets, not letting any of the brainwashing shit get her down. Never met a woman as brave as you, and that is fuckin' sexy." As his face edged closer, the heat of his energy invaded my space. "There's no comparison." The warm breeze of his soft lips brushed my cheek.

I held my breath and waited for him to pull away. He didn't. He lingered, and my heart launched to the sky in a multi-colored hot air balloon.

"Kiss me." I didn't mean to say it. It just came out. But it was out there now. Would he kiss me?

His other hand rose slowly to my neck, and he held me in his palms like you hold a dandelion before blowing its seed tufts away. "Drove me nuts you dancin' with Blaze."

A dangerous gust twisted low in my belly. As I inhaled to respond, he pressed his mouth to mine. His fingers squeezed my neck, and I whimpered. The tip of his tongue lapped at my upper lip. I opened for him, inviting him to invade my mouth. Yes, yes! Our tongues crashed and circled in a delicious wave. He tasted like champagne and wedding cake.

Without breaking the kiss, he pushed me to my back and hovered over me. I wrapped my arms around him and dug my fingertips into his solid shoulders. His clothes scuffed along the sequins at the hem of my dress as he gave me his weight. His hard cock pressed against my core through our clothes. God, I wanted to feel him like this with nothing between us. Just him and I naked and caressing each other.

His hand skated along my side to my knee, hitching it up around his hip. He ended the kiss and took a deep breath with his eyes closed. "So fucking sexy." His eyes opened slowly, and he focused on my cleavage. "I shouldn't. But damn." He kissed down my neck along the edge of the fabric, stopping at the lowest point with his nose between my breasts. "You smell good."

"Rogan." I tilted my hips and crushed his erection between us. He answered me with a sensual grind. God, it felt huge. "Please. Please don't stop." As our bodies worked their way infinitely closer, the heat between us fueled the air of my balloon higher and higher. My hands explored the curve of his back like I'd dreamed of for so long. His sinewy muscles felt bigger and stronger than my ultimate fantasies. My fingers stopped at the waistband of his slacks.

He raised his head. "Wish I could be the one to show you all you've never seen. The first to fuck you, erase whatever bullshit your dad planted in your head. Make you come hard. Watch you light up in my arms." He pressed his forehead to mine and his fingers curled behind my knee. "But I can't."

I gasped and tugged his shirt. "No. Don't say that." I pulled it free from his pants and ran my fingernails over the bare skin of his back. Sleek skin over taut muscles, burning hot under my fingertips. "You can. We can. Who's going to stop us?"

He growled and his body stilled. "I can't. You've had enough shit thrown at you. You don't need mine. After what you've been through, you need a man with a gentle hand. Someone whose heart is... free. That ain't me."

With one last inhale of his earthy scent, I grasped his shoulders and held tight. "No."

Don't pull away from me, please.

But my arms could never hold a man as strong as Rogan down. He broke from my grip like it was as weak as a spider web. He knifed up to standing with his gaze turned to the floor. He took a deep breath and a stunted step back.

I stared at the top of his head and panted to catch my breath.

Please come back.

"You'll be meeting plenty of influential people at Siege. Find yourself a VIP."

And just like that, the flame fueling our balloon extinguished, and we descended into freefall like we'd passed through the wall of a hurricane and sunk through the column of the eye.

He marched to the door and took off into the frigid night, not bothering to grab his jacket. Takoda and I stared at the closed door.

The basket of my balloon crashed to the ground, and I sat up on the couch. "Come here, girl." Takoda trotted to me and put a paw on my lap. As I scrubbed her head behind her ears, my deflated balloon fluttered to the earth. "Why did I ask him to kiss me, huh?"

Takoda looked back at me with a face that said, Because he's drop-dead gorgeous, you idiot. Who wouldn't?

"Too true. He is one fine man."

And a dangerously good kisser, even if he is impossible to understand. With a sigh, I gathered the nylon fabric of my balloon in my arms, carried it to my bed, and flopped on my back, burying myself in the rainbow.

The exhilarating ride had ended. My body lay on the ground, but my heart—my poor confused heart—soared through the roof, over the city, and up to the moon.

***

With my belongings in bags over my shoulders, I headed to the door. Time to leave. Rogan made it clear he didn't want me here anymore. Even if he found me fuckin' sexy, and let himself kiss me last night, he didn't want anything more with me.

What did he mean his heart wasn't free? Maybe Tori meant more to him than he let me see. Maybe he had another girl. Maybe he liked men. Whatever his reasoning, I needed to get away from him.

The few doors and a hallway separating us would provide a physical barrier for the persistent shame I felt for crushing on a guy who didn't want me. And for letting him touch and kiss me when I knew it didn't mean as much to him as it did to me.

"Keep your hands off her, man." I overheard Rogan talking in the hallway on the other side of the half-opened door.

"You claiming her?" Blaze asked.

"No," Rogan answered.

"Then you got no right to tell me not to touch her."

I bit my lip and held my breath to keep quiet.

"I don't. However, if you're interested in keeping all your limbs working, do not touch her."

"I hear you, but pull your head out if you want her. She ain't gonna be single for long. If it's not me, someone else is gonna take a chance at her, pretty and sweet as she is."

"Don't call her sweet. She doesn't like it."

I stepped out from behind the door. Rogan looked at me and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Need help, Tessa?" Blaze asked.

"Sure."

Rogan crossed his arms over his chest as I handed a bag to Blaze.

"Give me all of them," Blaze said.

"Oh, I can carry—"

"Pfft." He snatched my bags from my shoulder and stalked to his apartment.

I felt Rogan's heat as I stepped past him, but I didn't look up. "You can have your bed back now."

At Blaze's door, I risked a glance over my shoulder at him. His gaze drilled into me and his arms arched slightly forward, like he was asking me to walk into them. The hook in my heart tugged and twisted, but I turned my back on his lost puppy face and walked into my new apartment.

Goodbye, Rogan. I'm not waiting around for you to pull your head out.

***

I ran out the door with my head down, my backpack over my shoulder, and my dance clothes thrown on. I bounced off a rock hard wall of camouflage.

"Whoa, there." Rogan's raspy voice sounded in my ear as he steadied me with his hands on my upper arms.

Two weeks of avoiding Rogan and pretending I didn't miss him all came crashing to a fruitless end in the corridor outside Blaze's apartment. His beard had grown back in and dark mud splotches marred his clothes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't see you."

Butterflies zipped around in my tummy, and my legs trembled. This sexy-as-sin man had put all his weight on me and kissed me on the couch. He'd pulled my leg around his hip and mashed his hard cock into me. He'd also left me turned on and breathless.

"School start today?"

"Yes."

"What classes are you taking?"

"Science. History. I have some relearning to do."

"How do you feel about that?"

"I don't mind. I want to know the truth that's been kept from me."

"And dance?" He pointed to my leggings and leotard.

"Yep. I'm excited. Dancing wasn't allowed back home."

He nodded and grunted.

I pointed at his rifle bags and the pack over his shoulder. "Where're you coming back from?"

"Visiting your cousin Falcon in North Carolina."

"My cousin? Oh right. My cousin. How is he?"

"Doing well."

"Good. Good." I stared into his eyes and tried to read him. He had that distant gaze again of a man who was focused somewhere else. "Okay then. Bye."

I stepped out to pass him, but he grabbed my arm. "Enjoy your first day of school."

"Thank you."

Darn, darn, why did I find him so attractive? I wanted to sit down on the couch with him and talk about his trip to North Carolina and then have him kiss me and tell me I was fuckin' sexy.

"You get the number I sent you for Natalie Sorenson?"

"Yes. I have an appointment next week. I'm a little nervous talking to a therapist."

"You can trust her. Whatever you wanna tell her is safe."

"Okay." I looked down at his hand. "I need to get to class."

He released my arm slowly.

"Bye."

"Later."

I shouldn't have looked back, but part of me wanted to check out his butt in his fatigues and another part of me wondered if he was still watching me.

Yep. He was looking over his shoulder at me as he walked toward his apartment, and his ass looked yummy in his camo.