Chapter Twenty

The rhythm of the evening rain falling on the car’s roof made Allison feel sleepy as they drove through streets of Bradenton toward the highway. It had started drizzling right before they left, so Tony put the top up. Two coolers full of food rested on the back seat, permeating the car with the aromas of an Italian restaurant.

With her head on his chest and her eyes closed, Allison could feel Tony’s heartbeat thumping under her ear. The scent of his lime cologne filled her nose, and the flashes of light from passing cars penetrated her closed eyelids. She was in a state of near nirvana as his arm held her shoulder while his fingers stroked her hair and his lips touched the top of her head.

It all felt so intimate, but not as intimate as it was going to be when they got back to campus. They’d be taking their relationship to a new level starting tonight. Allison was more than ready. She’d been thinking about it for weeks.

Suddenly her eyes jerked open. Tony must have felt her stiffen because he asked, “You okay?”

No. Actually, she wasn’t okay. There was big old elephant in the car and she’d been avoiding acknowledging its presence for a long time. If she had more courage, she’d have asked him about it on the way to Bradenton instead of confronting him about not wanting to sleep with her. But she was too chicken. Her stomach flipped as she slid out of his embrace and sat up straighter on her side of the car. If she was going to have a serious relationship with this man, she needed to know the truth. She bit her lip and said, “There’s somethin’ I need to ask you about.”

“Okay.”

“That girl.” Allison swallowed hard. She was certain he knew what she was asking, but he stared straight ahead. “I heard a girl accused you of um raping her.” She watched Tony grip the steering wheel with both hands. It looked like he was moving in slow motion, but that was because of her own anxiety. He didn’t answer, so she took a deep breath. “I have to ask. Is it true?”

∙•∙

Allison’s voice sounded small and shaky when she asked the question. His jaw clenched and he could feel a fire building in his gut. He couldn’t believe this was happening, not now, not after they’d been growing so close. She was the one person he thought would never doubt him. Obviously he was wrong. “Are you freaking kidding me?” he blurted out. When he glanced in her direction, her eyes were wide with what looked like fear. “How can you even ask me that?”

“How can I not?” she shot back. Her angry tone matched his.

“Damn it, Allison.” He pounded his fist on the rim of the steering wheel. “We just had this awesome day together, and you just finished telling me what a great guy I am. Was all that just bullshit?”

“No, of course it wasn’t!”

“No?” He quickly glanced at her. “Then what’s with the questions? I thought you knew me better than that.”

“I do! But the thing is, I know you now. I didn’t know you then.” She reached for his arm but he shrugged her off. “I’m sorry, Tony. I’m not tryin’ to upset you or anythin’.” She looked out the fogged-up window at the darkness. “You have no idea how hard it was for me to even bring this up, but I had to.” She turned to look at him again. “I mean, if we’re gonna be seein’ each other, we can’t avoid the elephant in the room anymore.”

He breathed out through his nose. “So, what if I don’t give you the right answer? Will it change everything between us?”

“Honestly? I don’t know.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her looking downward. “If you would have heard the things that campus security guard who questioned me said about you. She—”

Tony’s face grew hot. “Are you freaking kidding me? What the hell did she say?”

“She just told me to be careful, ’cause… you know.”

“What the hell is her name? Tell me her name,” he shouted. “Cuz if she don’t stop spreading rumors about me, I’m gonna shut her mouth for her.”

“Stop it,” Allison shouted. “That just makes you sound guilty.”

Tony cut the steering wheel hard, so hard that Allison had to clutch the seat and the car door to brace herself.

He swerved into a shopping center and drove like a maniac through the parking lot until the car screeched into a spot. He shut the engine, opened the door and slammed it behind him.

»»•««

She looked out the window and watched Tony marching away from the car. She closed her eyes and drew a deep breath. “Dayum. I can’t believe this,” she mumbled. That was not the reaction she expected from him. In fact, she’d never seen him this angry before. As for her, she was furious at him for storming off like that, furious and hurt. So, what now?

She pressed her nose against the window and peered through the raindrops to figure out where she was, but it was too hard to see. So she fished her cell phone out of her purse and opened the car door to get a stronger signal. She stood up and spotted a lighted sign on a storefront. “SunMart,” she said out loud. She entered the words “Sunmart Supercenter” into her phone to get a location. She closed the car door and leaned against it, not caring at the moment that her back was getting damp. The rest of her would be drenched before long too.

A loud clap of thunder sounded, causing her to jump. “Oh great, all I need right now.” She felt tears pool in her eyes as one of the best days of her life just turned into the worst. Don’t freak out, Allison. There’s plenty time to fall apart later. Turning around, she faced the car and looked toward the street for a road sign. She pressed an icon on her phone screen and “Milli” came up, the app with a million answers. A robotic female voice came through the speaker. “How can I help?”

Allison held the phone close to her mouth. “First, y’all can get me a new boyfriend. Then you can tell me where I can catch a bus from Cortez and Palm Road in Bradenton back to Eastern Florida University in Orlando.”

Without warning, a hand grabbed her arm and whirled her around. Tony pinned her against the car, an arm pressed against the car’s roof on each side of her body. Allison’s eyes were wide as she stared at him with the rain drizzling down on them. She felt more irritated than afraid. His eyes burned with something and she couldn’t tell whether it was rage or desire until he kissed her, pressing his lips against hers as hard as he ever had. In spite of her anger, she sank into the kiss. His hands left the car and pressed into her spine pulling her closer. She wrapped her arms around his body while Milli droned on about alternative bus routes. She clicked the power button to turn Milli off.

Tony’s lips trailed toward her ear and he kissed her cheek, whispering, “I'm sorry, Allie. I’m sorry. I’ll tell you everything you want to know.”

»»•««

The steady beat of the windshield wipers going back and forth and back and forth was the only sound in the car for the first fifteen minutes after they resumed their drive. Their hair and clothes were rain-soaked and the car now smelled like wet dogs in a musty old pizzeria. They were finally on the open road of the highway, but Tony and Allison weren’t cuddled up like they’d been earlier. No, this time, they weren’t touching at all.

Allison took a sidelong glance at Tony. He said he’d tell her anything she wanted to know, but right now he wasn’t talking at all. Was he stalling? Or was he waiting for her to ask a direct question. The suspense was killing her. “So, what happened?”

Keeping his eyes on the road ahead, he spoke calmly. “I didn’t rape that girl. I didn’t rape anyone.” He glanced over at Allison. “I mean, yeah, I slept with her, but it was her idea just as much as it was mine.”

“Then why do you think she said what she said?”

“I don’t know.” He shrugged. “I mean I saw her once or twice after she made those accusations and I asked her why she lied about it.”

“And?”

“She never really answered. I mean, maybe she wanted attention or something, though I swear I don’t know why anyone would want that kind of attention. The guys think it was because I didn’t call her after. Maybe I was too cavalier or something.”

“That’s a lot of maybes,” Allison said quietly.

“Maybe. But it’s the best I can do.” He tentatively reached for her hand. “I’m telling you the God’s honest truth, Allie. Do you believe me?”

He locked eyes with her briefly before facing front, and she knew he was telling the truth. She could see it in his eyes. “I do. My instincts always told me you were a good guy. I mean, you’re always good to me and respectful. I’ve never felt anything but safe when I’m with you, but—” Her words trailed off.

“But what?”

“I had to ask. I had to hear it from you. You’re not mad, are you?”

Tony brought her hand to his lips. “Not anymore. You just caught me off guard. I’m sorry I snapped, Allie.”

“It’s okay. Just don’t do it again,” she said with a small smile. “And don’t go runnin’ off either. That’s my job.”

Tony laughed a little. “I won’t run away if you don’t. And hey, for the record, I haven’t been with anybody since. I get not-so-random drug and STD tests every few weeks and I’m clean. I can show you the results.”

“I believe you.” Allison slid closer and leaned her head on his shoulder and stroked his arm. “I meant what I said this afternoon. You’re a good guy, Tony. I never told you, but the best thing that ever happened to me was when some guy stared at me during cheer practice and threw off my timing.”

“That was the best thing that ever happened to you? I messed you up.”

“Maybe. But you made up for it a thousand times, Tony. You helped me practice for tryouts and you wouldn’t let me give up on myself. I mean, you really gave a lot of thought to figuring out why I had trouble with the routines.” Allison choked up. “If that didn’t happen, we wouldn’t have—” Allison was about to say “fallen in love,” but the timing didn’t feel right to proclaim her feelings for him, so instead she said, “we wouldn’t have gotten to know each other.”

Tony kissed her hair without taking his eyes off the road. “I didn’t know you felt that way. I still kind of feel bad about it.”

“Well stop.”

Smiling, he said, “Whatever you say, Nails. I like the way you always look on the bright side.”

She nuzzled into him. “Not always. But definitely more often since I met you.”

»»•««

Tony flipped on the kitchen light when they entered his fourth-floor dorm room. The room was hot and stuffy, so he turned down the thermostat on the wall. Blowing some air through his lips, he gripped the hem of his T-shirt and shook it out. Even though his clothes were mostly dry by now, he was beginning to feel the heat. “Takes a few minutes to cool down,” he told Allison.

Allison indicated the two coolers filled with food from Grandma Russo they had just lugged up to the dorm. “Um. Shouldn’t we put these in the fridge?”

Tony scratched his temple. “Oh. Uh. Yeah. Of course.” He clearly wasn’t thinking about food at the moment.

Allison opened both coolers and began to unpack them. “This is the baked ziti,” she said, as she read Barbara’s handwriting on the cardboard lid of the casserole. “It’s heavy,” she commented while handing the hefty container to Tony. “This one says meatballs. And this is the extra sauce for the meatballs. And one more. Here’s the lasagna.”

Squatting in front of the refrigerator, Tony gazed inside. “I don’t think I could get another thing in here if I tried.” He looked up at her. “I’ll divide this up so you can take some back to your dorm with you.” He squeezed his eyes shut and mentally kicked himself for making it sound like he wanted her to leave. He didn’t. He wanted more than anything for her to stay.

“I’d rather eat together.” She smiled sweetly at him. “But it’ll take a year to finish all this food.”

He rose to his feet and closed the fridge. “Not once my team gets to it. I think they like me visiting my grandmother better than I do.”

“You share it with your teammates?”

“Sure. Like you said, no way I can eat all this food by myself.”

Allison nodded. She looked at him for a long moment and he almost made a move. But he hesitated a moment too long. She turned around and walked away from the kitchenette toward the sleeping area of the one-room apartment. Tony’s bed was on the left side of the room, but she faced forward, looking toward the window a few feet in front of her. The sleeping area was dark except for the fluorescent glow from the kitchen and the light filtering in from the street through the Venetian blinds.

Standing in the middle of the room, she nervously played with her bracelet. “Does your grandmother always send you home with that much food?”

“Yeah, like I told you this morning, she could feed an army.”

“Oh right. I forgot you already told me.”

She was obviously nervous too, he realized. He came up behind her and instead of taking her in his arms like he wanted to, he put his hands in his pants pockets like an inexperienced teenager. He hadn’t felt this awkward around a girl since he was thirteen. Then again, he never felt this way about anyone before now. “So um thanks for your help. It would have taken me longer to put it all away by myself.” Lame Ramos, really lame.

“No problem,” she muttered quietly, continuing to face away from him. Her head turned toward the bed for a moment. “I’ve um never been in your room before.”

“I’m aware,” he said with a small laugh. “But, you’re here now.” He took his hands out of his pockets and squeezed her shoulders from behind. And now that you’re here, I’m never letting you go. He leaned closer to her ear. “I’m glad you came with me today.”

She nodded. “Me too.” She reached for his right hand on her shoulder and drew it across her body, holding it against her chest. “Can you feel how fast my heart is racin’?”

Sliding his left hand down the length of her arm, he captured her hand, threading their fingers together. He slowly brought it backward to his own chest. “Can you feel mine?”

She nodded. “Our hearts are beatin’ to the same rhythm.”

He released her hands and locked her in his arms from behind. He leaned in and let his cheek brush against hers. Her face was so soft and cool next to his. That scent of fresh ripe fruit was like a drug. He pressed his lips to her cheek and whispered, “You said you thought I didn’t want you. The truth is, I’ve never wanted anyone more.” He swallowed hard, waiting for a reaction.

“Then show me,” she said quietly.

He took a deep breath, instantly feeling his arousal grow at the sound of those three little words. God he wanted her so much. In his mind, he saw himself ripping her clothes off and ravaging every part of her body. He breathed hard and reminded himself to go slow, Ramos.

He slid his hands back up her arms and turned her around to face him. He swallowed hard and gazed into her deep blue eyes and for a moment, that was enough. Those beautiful blue eyes were watery, welling up with the importance of this moment. He felt it too. Things would never be the same after tonight, and he never wanted them to be the same because he was in love with her.

He held her face in his hands and leaned closer, capturing her lips with his. “Tony,” she whispered against his mouth. Her breath made him shiver with desire. Pulling her closer to his body he deepened the kiss. He leaned away and looked down at her top. Her chest rose and fell with anticipation as she waited for him to make the next move. His fingers followed his eyes, grasping the hem of her T-shirt and drawing it over her head before dropping it. She took his breath away.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said licking his lips.

She turned around and pulled her ponytail to one side, silently telling him to unclasp her bra. He quickly complied and she let the bra fall to her feet. He pulled his own shirt over his head and pressed his chest to her bare back. He threaded his fingers through her hair and gently rolled the elastic hair band out of her hair and let it fall to the floor. He parted her long hair and held half in one hand and half in the other as he brought it over her shoulders to the front of her body. Slowly, he slid his fingertips down her strands until they reached her bare breasts. She sucked in some air when he skimmed her skin and she began to breathe harder as he palmed her breasts. Leaning over her shoulder to watch his actions, he cradled each breast and held them up, running his thumbs along the underside of her nipples as they began to stiffen from his stimulation.

She rested her head against his chest and placed her hands on top of his to guide his fingertips over her nipples. He closed his eyes for a moment to concentrate on his sense of touch. Her breasts were so silky and firm and he marveled how perfectly they fit in the palms of his hands, how they reacted as he caressed them over and over.

With every touch, she breathed harder between soft utterances of “ooh” and “yes.” She reached behind her and caressed the back of his neck. Turning only her head she urged him to kiss her and he did in an instant.

She finally turned to face him without breaking the kiss and ran her hands up over his chest to his shoulders. She stood on her tiptoes to reach his lips and nearly lost her balance. Falling into him, he caught her in his arms and they laughed. That laugh was exactly what Tony needed to release any remaining anxiety. He swept her up and cradled her in his arms, gently placing her onto his bed. He kicked off his tennis shoes and pulled down his jeans while he watched her wriggle out of her capris. His body flushed at the sight of her completely unclothed. He threw a leg over the bed like he was mounting a horse and straddled her naked body.

Still on his knees, he bent over her and kissed the crook of her neck, letting his lips glide downward until he captured her breast in his mouth. On instinct, his hand roamed over her other breast sweeping his thumb back and forth like a windshield wiper, before gently twisting her nipple and finishing with soft pinches. She squirmed under his touch and arched her back, her soft moan telling him she liked those moves.

When he felt her take hold of his shaft and begin to massage its head, he released her breast with a soft pop. He breathed hard, pausing to look at her face before covering her mouth with his lips, and darting his tongue inside. His shaft pressed against her opening and he used it to stimulate her further. The action intensified his own longing, making it torture to hold back.

Breaking contact for a moment, he opened the drawer of his nightstand and withdrew a condom. As he sheathed himself, he leaned over and licked her ear. In a deep voice, he promised, “Next time we’ll go slow.”

She nodded and pulled him flush onto her body and scraped his back with her nails. “I can’t wait any more either, sugar,” she purred.

He maneuvered his knees between her legs, spreading them apart with the outsides of his thighs. His tip teased her opening and she crossed her ankles behind his back, pulling his spine toward her. Her opening was moist and he penetrated easily, plunging in and out again and again, diving deeper with each thrust. “Allison,” he whispered repeatedly as he ravaged her face with kisses. He knew he wasn’t going to last long, so he arched his back and pressed two fingers over her most sensitive spot. She shivered beneath him—once, twice, three times. When he was sure she was satisfied, he let himself go.

»»•««

Tony stirred from sleep and felt his arm pinned under something. When he turned his head, he saw that something was Allison. She looked like a princess in one of those fairy tale movies his grandmother made him watch when he was little. Back then, he could never have imagined an angelic girl like Allison would want to be with a guy like him. He kissed her bare shoulder.

When she opened her eyes and smiled at him, he cupped her chin. “I didn’t mean to wake you again.”

“I wasn’t really asleep,” she said, stretching out her body. “Do you want me to leave?”

His eyes widened. “What? No. Why? Do you want to go?” He held his breath waiting for her answer.

“No, no, I just didn’t wanna assume.”

He curled his arm under her and pulled her closer. He never wanted her to leave. He kissed her softly. “I want you to stay with me, Allie,” he whispered.

She rolled onto her side and looked into his eyes. “Can I tell you somethin’,” she asked, playing with his chest hair. “You surprised me.”

“Uh oh.”

“No, I mean that in a good way. You were so caring and considerate.” She stroked his scruff. “You’re so much more… I don’t know… sweet than I expected. You’re an amazin’ lover, Tony.”

He took a deep breath and kissed her forehead. “If I am, it’s only because you bring it out of me.”

“I’m being serious,” she insisted.

“So am I.” He rolled closer and leaned over her. “I can blow you away again if you want,” he murmured in a low, sexy voice.

Allison threw her head back and laughed. She lifted the sheet that covered the two of them. “Go for it.”

Tony rolled on top of her and pressed his mouth to hers, letting the moisture of their lips mingle. He leaned away to look at her. “Can I tell you something?” When she nodded, he said, “You’re the best thing I ever waited for.”