Chapter 3
FLUSTERED
FAWN
“It will be fun, they told me. Live a little, they said,” I huff, staring at my sisters through our reflection in the mirror in front of us—and ignoring how horrifying I look right now. My makeup has melted off, and my hair is now a hundred times bigger than when we left the house. I look like something the cat spit up before dragging home.
“It was fun.” Mac yawns, and I turn my head to glare at her. She shrugs. “What? Even you have to admit you had fun tonight.”
“No part of being arrested is fun.”
“We technically weren’t arrested,” Libby puts in, and I transfer my glare to her. She rolls her eyes. “Well, we weren’t—they didn’t even read us our Miranda rights.”
“We’re sitting in an interrogation room at a police station,” I point out.
She looks around, muttering, “This is true.” She bites her bottom lip like she just realized where we are.
“God save me.” I drop my head to the top of the table with a thud, then lift it quickly and sit up straight in my chair when the knob starts to turn. As soon as the door opens, my eyes widen and the color drains from my face. “This cannot be happening,” I breathe, watching Levi step into the room. His head is down; he’s looking at a stack of papers in his hand, so I can’t see his beautiful face, but I have no doubt it’s him. I’d know his broad shoulders and thick head of hair anywhere. Scooting as low as I can in my seat without crawling under the table, I lower my face toward my chest and try to hide, praying he doesn’t recognize me.
“Aren’t we supposed to get a phone call?” Mac asks, and I scoot even lower, swearing I feel his eyes burning into the side of my head as I study the top of the table like it’s the most fascinating thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life.
“Fawn?” Pretending I have no idea who Fawn is, I tuck my chin closer to my chest.
“How do you know my sister?” Libby asks, blowing my cover and leaving me with no choice but to lift my head and look at him.
“Oh, hi, Levi.” I wave like the idiot I am, and his brows pull together tightly over his beautiful golden eyes in confusion. “These are my sisters, Libby and Mac,” I introduce them, and his gaze narrows.
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
“It’s a long story.” I smile, then watch him turn back toward the door and stick his head out.
“Jinks, come in here,” he shouts, then turns back to face me, crossing his arms over his chest.
“What’s up?” one of the officers who brought us in asks, poking his head in through the crack in the door before coming into the room completely.
“I thought you and Van said you brought in three prostitutes.”
“We did. We picked them up two blocks over from the murder.”
“These women are not prostitutes.”
“They looked like prostitutes and were in a known area for prostitution,” Jinks says.
Glaring at him, I grit out, “I told you we were walking to the train to go home.”
“You also had no IDs.” He shrugs his broad shoulders, and my hands ball in my lap.
“This is my neighbor,” Levi states with a shake of his head at Jinks before looking at me once more. “What were you doing over there? And why the hell are you dressed like that?” he questions, raking his eyes over me, causing my skin to tingle and heat the same way it did last time I was around him.
“We were at a bar—”
“You were at a bar dressed like that?” he cuts me off, and there is no mistaking that he’s angry, judging by the tick of his jaw and the growl in his tone. I just don’t get why. It’s Halloween. Most women I know use Halloween as an excuse to dress like they are streetwalkers. Okay, some go as zombies, but even then, they are typically slutty zombies.
“It was a pimps and hoes party,” Libby says unhelpfully, and I shove my elbow in her side, only to have her do the same back to me, making me wince and cover the abused spot with my hand.
“Pimps and hoes,” he repeats, looking directly at me, and I shift in my seat.
“Yes, a pimps and hoes party at Jack’s. You know, the bar near the stadium,” Mac tosses in, and I close my eyes briefly, wishing my sisters would just be quiet.
“So why were you three walking in the cold without coats?” Jinks asks.
“Like we told you on the ride to the station, our coats were stolen from the bar, but I still had my MetroCard in my bra, so we were walking to the train, which now I realize was a giant damn mistake,” Libby grumbles, glaring at Officer Jinks.
“Ya think?” Jinks asks with a grin, and we all glare at him—including Levi. “Just sayin’.” He holds out a hand in front of himself. “You could have called a cab and paid the fare when you got to your place.”
God, we are seriously so damn stupid, because not one of us thought of that.
“I’ll take you home,” Levi mutters, and my stomach drops to my toes as panic fills my chest.
“That’s not necessary. You’re working—we can take a cab, you know, and pay him when we reach my apartment,” I say hopefully, wringing my hands together in my lap, but he shakes his head, not uncrossing his arms.
“I’m heading home anyways, so I’ll take you.”
“Perfect.” Mac stands along with Libby, leaving me no choice but to do the same, since it would look really strange if I refused to go with them. Silently cursing myself for being such a pushover with my sisters, I stand and attempt to pull my dress down enough to cover my ass. After a few seconds of tugging and pulling, I give up the fight and start toward the door, watching Levi’s jaw clench the closer I get to him.
“Here.” He slips off his suit jacket and swings it around my shoulders before I have a chance to refuse. I feel the weight and warmth settle around my body and the scent of soap and musk seep into my lungs. My gaze locks with his, and my head gets dizzy while my legs feel weak, and it takes everything in me to keep standing.
“Thanks,” I murmur, getting lost in his eyes.
“What about us? Do we get jackets?” Libby asks, breaking into the moment, and Levi’s hand that had been resting lightly on my shoulder drops away, making me want to growl from the loss. Jealousy fills my chest as his eyes go to her, and I wait for the inevitable to happen. I know men think Libby is beautiful—because she is—and I know she can get pretty much any man she wants, so I expect to see some kind of flare of desire when he looks at her. But there is nothing, not even a hint of something. Which is surprising, since every guy I’ve ever been even a little interested in has looked at her with interest, even if they try to hide it.
“Sorry, only got one,” he says with a shrug, holding the door open for us. When we step into the hall, my stomach knots as we wait for him to move ahead of us. I don’t know what just happened, but my heart is pounding so hard I can feel its relentless thump, thump, thump in my throat.
“I can’t believe you never mentioned living next to a hottie who knows how to use a set of cuffs,” Libby whispers loudly, leaning into me as we follow Levi and Officer Jinks down a long hall while they talk quietly.
“Shut up, Libby,” I hiss, trying to keep up with Levi’s mile-long legs in my heels that are now killing me.
“Just saying, I totally understand now why you didn’t want me to hook you up with anyone.”
“Libby,” I warn, watching Levi’s shoulders tense as my sister continues talking.
“What? I’m just saying, if I had a guy like him living next door to me, I wouldn’t look elsewhere, either.”
“Please.” I look at her and jerk my chin toward Levi’s back, hoping she will realize he can totally hear every single word she’s saying.
“Oh yeah, sorry,” she mumbles, having the audacity to look contrite. “You probably don’t want him to know that you want him.” My teeth snap together, and I glare at her, letting her know silently that if we weren’t in the middle of a police station I would take her to the ground and force her to be quiet like I’ve been doing my whole life.
“Libby, stop being a pain.” Mac laughs, tucking Libby into her side, forcing her to walk next to her a few feet ahead of me. Thankful for the reprieve, I drop my eyes to the ground and wrap my arms around my middle as I walk behind them.
“Fawn,” Levi calls, and I stop walking and lift my eyes to his staring back at me.
“Levi?” I prompt when he does nothing more than scan my face.
“I’ll be right back.”
“Uh, sure.” I nod, gaining his chin lift in reply before he and Jinks disappear behind a closed door at the entrance of the station.
Feeling Mac and Libby get close, I pull my eyes from the door to look at them. “Someone’s been holding out on us,” Mac says, and I shrug.
“He’s my new neighbor. I don’t really know him.” Her eyes search mine, and a slow smile spreads across her face like she knows something I don’t. “I’ve only talked to him once before today,” I continue, and her smile broadens.
“Sure,” she says, like she doesn’t believe me, and I bite my tongue, refusing to let her bait me into an argument, which is something she does often.
“Ready?” Levi asks a few minutes later, and I let out the breath I’ve been holding.
“Yep.” I start for the door behind my sisters, who have already stepped outside ahead of us.
“Hold up.” His voice slides over me as his long, warm fingers wrap around my wrist and tighten when I try to tug free.
“What?” I look up at him, hating how breathless I sound.
“Paper.”
“What?” I repeat, getting lost in his gaze and touch as the fingers on his other hand slide up my temple and through my hair.
“You have paper in your hair,” he says, gently flicking his fingers out, causing a small scrap of white paper to float to the floor.
“Oh.” I drop my eyes from his and shake my head, trying to get rid of the dizziness and the feeling in the pit of my stomach.
“Come on, let’s get you home.” He drops my wrist and moves his hand to my lower back, where it burns a hole straight through his jacket and my dress into my skin, until he finally drops it away so he can help me into the front seat of his SUV. He makes sure I’m settled before he slams the door.
“So are you going to tell us who this guy is to you?” Libby asks from the backseat as I put on my seat belt.
“Leave her alone, Lib,” Mac says quietly, and I watch in fascination as Levi moves around the hood to the driver’s side. I’ve never really noticed the way a man walks before, but his walk is confident and sure.
“I’m just curious,” Libby grumbles right as Levi opens his door.
“Are you all going to the same place?” Levi questions, sliding in behind the steering wheel, putting the key in the ignition, and starting up the engine.
“Yes, and thank you for giving us a ride. We really appreciate it,” Mac says from the backseat as we pull out into traffic.
“It’s not a big deal. I was heading home anyway,” he replies as we stop at a red light.
“What are you doing?” I tense as he reaches across the middle console between us.
“No need to yell fire, babe,” he jokes, reminding me of our first encounter, and my cheeks heat as something in my stomach twists on the word babe. Holding my breath, I watch him adjust the heater vents on my side to blow directly on me before turning up the warm air.
“I thought you were going to kill me,” I defend myself, hearing him chuckle as the light turns green and he presses the gas.
“I thought about it.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, I also thought about a couple other things,” he says, and I wonder what those things were, but I don’t have enough guts to ask him.
“Did you have a good night at work?” I ask instead, then wish I hadn’t, because he’s obviously a homicide detective and I can’t imagine any part of that being good. “Sorry, that was a stupid question. Ignore me.”
“It’s all right.” He turns his head toward me and smiles. “Can’t say it was a good night, but there is always a little bit of satisfaction involved when I bring someone to justice.”
“Did you . . . I mean, did you bring someone to justice tonight?”
“Yeah, but now I have a new case to solve.”
“The guy who killed the prostitute?” I ask softly, watching his expression change in the green lights coming off the dash.
“Yeah.” He nods once, and his fist tightens on the steering wheel.
“It must be difficult witnessing firsthand the worst parts of humanity, day after day.”
“It’s not easy,” he agrees, and I wrap my hands together in my lap to keep from reaching over and touching him in some way. To assure him that what he’s doing is important and appreciated. “I’ll drop you girls off out front, then go find parking,” he says, and I pull my eyes from him and realize we have already reached our block.
“Sure, thanks again.” I give him a small smile as he pulls up in front of our apartment building and I unhook my seat belt.
“Yeah, thanks for the ride,” Libby and Mac say.
I open my door and hop down, slamming my door as he says, “No problem.”
Heading to the building, I punch in the code for the door and let my sisters in ahead of me. “Um, how are we going to get into your apartment?” Mac asks as we head up the stairs to my place.
“My hidden key,” I tell her, walking across the open space between Levi’s apartment and mine. Bending, I lift the corner of the mat in front of my door and pull off the spare key I taped there when I moved in.
“That’s not very safe.” Libby eyes the key as I peel it off the tape.
“The building’s safe, and only tenants have the code for the front door.”
“Still, Dad would kill you if he knew you had a key hidden under your mat.”
“Dad will never know.” I shove the key in the lock and push the door open. “Hey, baby, did you miss us?” I smile at Muffin, who greets us with her tail wagging a hundred miles an hour. Giving her some love, I pat her head, then walk around her. “Let Mama change; then I’ll take you out to potty.”
“Yeah, and when you come back, you can tell us about Levi,” Mac says, dropping to the couch. Muffin climbs up next to her, pushing her head under Mac’s hand.
“There’s nothing to tell,” I mutter to myself, kicking off my heels before taking Levi’s jacket off and laying it across the end of my bed carefully. Pulling the dress off over my head, I roll it into a ball, then head for the bathroom, where I toss the stupid thing in the trash.
“There is some serious chemistry going on between you and Mr. Officer,” Libby informs me as she leans against the bathroom door while I grab a makeup removal wipe and start to scrub my face clean.
“He’s just a nice guy.” Shrugging off the look she gives me, I pick up my hairbrush, then drop it back to the top of the counter and grab a hair tie instead and tie my hair into a ponytail. As soon as I’m done, I look at her in the mirror. “I’m not interested.”
“Sure, you’re not,” she says sarcastically, stepping out of my way so I can leave the bathroom.
“It’s the truth,” I grumble, opening my closet and grabbing a pair of my favorite sweats off the top shelf, then a tank top from my drawer. I put both on quickly before slipping on my Toms.
“If you say so.” She turns and leaves the room. Biting my tongue to keep from replying, I head for the living room behind her and watch as she flops down on the couch next to Mac.
“I think he likes you,” Mac says, and Libby agrees as she kicks off her heels.
Ignoring both of them, I open the closet next to the front door and grab my windbreaker and Muffin’s leash.
“Ready?” I ask my girl, who is already waiting at the door, looking at me like I need to hurry up. As she wags her tail in reply, I attach her leash, then look toward the couch. “I’ll be right back.”
“We’ll be here,” Mac says, flipping on the television.
Swinging open the door, I groan when I find Levi on the other side with his hand ready to knock.
When will this night end?
“Hey, hold this.” I shove Muffin’s leash at him before he has a chance to say anything and turn back to my apartment. Going to my bedroom, I quickly grab his jacket and head right back to the door without looking at the couch, where I can feel two sets of eyes watching me. I have no doubt both my sisters are smiling.
“Night, Levi,” Libby calls, and I shut the door quickly, cutting off the sound of her and Mac laughing.
Feeling my face heat in embarrassment, I shove his jacket into his chest without looking at him, muttering, “Here’s your jacket. Thanks for letting me borrow it,” while attempting to take Muffin’s leash from his tight grasp with my free hand.
“Are you taking her out?” he asks, placing his fingers under my chin and forcing me to look at him.
“Yeah.”
“I’ll go with you.” His hand drops away, and he finally takes his jacket from me. At a loss for words, I watch him as he walks the four steps to his apartment—still holding Muffin’s leash—opens his door, and tosses the jacket in carelessly before slamming the door.
“You don’t have to come with us. We’re just going across the street to the park.”
“I don’t mind.” Okay, what the hell do I say to that? I don’t want you to go with me because you make me dizzy and I don’t know how to act when you’re close?
“All righty then,” I murmur instead, catching his lips twitch before I drop my gaze to the top of Muffin’s head so I can avoid looking at him.
Heading down the stairs with Muffin leading the way, we leave the building and walk in silence across the street to the park. I expect Muffin to do what she always does as soon as we make it to the grass—which is take care of business quickly before dragging me back home—but tonight is apparently not that kind of night. No, tonight my dog has decided she needs to sniff every single blade of grass and stop at every tree as we walk slowly down the tree-lined path.
“Your sisters seem nice,” he says, breaking the silence, and I turn to him and find his beautiful eyes on me.
“They are, but they are also crazy.” I kick a pebble, watching it fly through the air and bounce a few feet away before rolling into the grass.
“I doubt they have anything on my brothers.”
“You have brothers?” I tilt my head back toward him, again watching him smile.
“Yep, three. All younger.” Studying him with the dim light coming from the streetlamps above us, I try to guess how old he is.
“I’m thirty.” He nudges my shoulder with his, and I duck my head, wondering how he knew what I was thinking.
“How old are you?” he asks, stopping to let Muffin sniff another tree.
“Twenty-seven in three days.”
“You’re still a baby.”
“I guess if I were an old man I’d think twenty-seven was young, too.” I smile, enjoying the sound of his deep laugh as it rumbles through the quiet night. “So, do your brothers live in the city?”
“No, they all live in Connecticut near my parents, in the town we grew up in.” He stops and pulls me close to him as a man jogs by, then lets me go once he’s passed, and we resume walking. “Our mom would lose her mind if any one of them left with her grandkids.”
“Do all of your brothers have kids?”
“Yep.”
“But you live here in the city.”
“I do.”
“So you don’t have kids?” I surmise, watching a slow grin spread across his face.
“Nah, no kids. Not yet anyway.”
“Cool,” I mumble like an idiot, silently begging Muffin to hurry up so I can get home before I make an even bigger fool of myself.
“Are you cold?” he questions, and I realize I’ve half disappeared into my windbreaker, trying to escape the freezing wind that has suddenly picked up.
“A little. It’s been so warm during the day, I keep forgetting how cold the nights are.”
“Come here.” He wraps his arm around my shoulders, and my body stiffens. “Relax, I’m just keeping you warm.” Relax? Is he crazy? How the hell am I supposed to relax when he’s touching me? It’s bad enough being around him, let alone feeling his warmth against my side and his smell of clean soap and musk suffocating me. “What are your plans for your birthday?”
“I . . . um . . .” Oh god, he’s short-circuiting my brain. I can’t even get a full sentence out.
“That sounds fun.” He chuckles, and I smack his abs without thinking.
“Don’t make fun of me.”
“Gorgeous, I’m not making fun of you. I think you’re adorable when you get all flustered.”
“I’m not flustered,” I lie, trying with everything in me to ignore the butterflies in my stomach that have taken flight and the fact that he’s once again making me dizzy.
“It’s cute.”
“Whatever.” I pull my eyes from his, thanking the good lord above when Muffin starts to do her business, then curse under my breath when she looks at me, stops, and walks to another spot to start her search all over again.
“So what are your plans for your birthday?”
“My parents are coming into the city on Friday to take me to see The Lion King. Every year for my birthday we see a show—it’s a tradition.”
“That’s nice, but your birthday’s Tuesday, right?”
“Yeah.”
“So what are you doing on your birthday?”
“I don’t know. I have work the next day, so I’ll probably just order a pizza from Caminos and watch a movie or something.” God, that sounds lame, even to me.
“No boyfriend taking you out?” he asks, and his arm tightens around me ever so slightly on the word boyfriend.
“No . . . um, no boyfriend.” I pull my bottom lip between my teeth and bite hard to keep from asking why he wants to know.
“And your sisters aren’t taking you out?”
“After tonight, I think I need a break from them,” I mutter drily; his arm tightens, and his body shakes with laughter.
“That bad, huh?”
“I told you they’re crazy.”
“Well, if you want some company, I’m off Tuesday. Just knock on my door—we can hang out and order pizza.”
“Okay.” I nod, knowing I’d be more inclined to run naked through Times Square than knock on his door for any reason, let alone ask him to hang out with me on my birthday.
“She’ll never knock,” he says to himself, and I look up at him.
“Pardon?”
“You won’t knock. Hell, if I see you after tonight, I’ll be surprised.”
“What does that mean?” I frown, and his eyes scan my face.
“Since I moved in, you’ve been avoiding me. I don’t see that changing.”
“I haven’t been avoiding you,” I lie, wondering how the hell he knows I’ve been avoiding him. Have I been that obvious? I don’t think I have been.
“Babe, I’ve knocked on your door and heard you on the other side turn off the TV and play possum.”
Oh my god, how the hell did he hear that? “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I bet you don’t.” He sighs, and I can’t tell if it’s a sigh of annoyance or something else as his arm tightens again, forcing me deeper into his side as we stop at another tree.
“Good girl,” I call to Muffin when she finally takes care of business and turns her head toward the sound of my voice. Her ears perk up, and her tail wags, shaking her whole body as she gallops back toward us and bumps her nose into Levi’s thigh.
“Are you ready to head back?” he asks me while rubbing the top of her head.
“Sure.” I let out the breath I’ve been holding as he turns us around and leads us back through the park and across the street to the apartment building. Once we are both inside our building, I expect him to give me Muffin’s leash and remove his arm from around my shoulders, but he doesn’t. Instead he keeps us locked together side by side as we take the stairs with Muffin ahead of us. I want to dislike the way it feels being tucked almost protectively under his arm, but I don’t. Instead I’m wondering what kind of excuse I can make up to spend more time right where I am without actually having to admit to myself that I like him.
“If I don’t see you on your birthday, I hope you have a good time,” he says, letting me go once we reach the landing between his apartment and mine. Turning to face him, I take Muffin’s leash as he holds it out, then look up into his golden eyes.
“Thanks.”
“My pleasure.” His fingers touch the underside of my chin; then his thumb sweeps just below my bottom lip. Getting lost in the way he’s looking at me, I lean into his touch and hold my breath as his face starts to descend toward mine.
“Oh good, you’re back. I was just coming to check on you.” Mac breaks into the moment. I jump back a mile like I’ve been caught with my hand in the cookie jar, and I hear Levi curse quietly behind me. “Oh sorry, I thought you were out here alone,” Mac says, and I don’t even have to look at her to know she’s smirking.
“It’s fine, I was just coming in . . . um, night, Levi.” I wave in his direction without looking at him, then growl under my breath when Muffin tugs on her leash, preventing me from making my escape.
Feeling my face heat, I turn around and find my dog sitting at Levi’s side with his hand on the top of her head. “Go on in, girl,” he commands with a pat to her head, and Muffin looks up at him, then looks at me, but what she doesn’t do is move an inch.
“Come on, Muffin,” I urge, giving her leash a gentle tug as my face grows hotter.
“I think Muffin wants to stay with Levi.” Mac laughs, and I glare at her. “Just sayin’.” She smiles.
“Come on,” Levi rumbles, and I watch him lead Muffin to my apartment door, where Mac steps back to let him inside. Feeling the leash in my hand pull, I know I don’t have a choice but to follow behind them.
“Oh, hey, Levi,” Libby calls from the couch as I release Muffin so she can get to Libby. “We’re getting ready to watch a movie. Do you want to join us?” she asks, and I peek up to find him already halfway out the door.
“Sorry, it’s been a long day.” He pauses to look over his shoulder. “Maybe next time,” he says, then his eyes find mine and I hold my breath. “Night, Fawn. See you soon.” The promise in those words and the look in his eyes has goose bumps breaking out across my skin.
“Night, Levi.” I watch him close the door behind him as he leaves.
Shrugging off my windbreaker, I avoid looking at either one of my sisters as I hang it in the closet along with Muffin’s leash.
“So Levi went with you to walk Muff—”
“Don’t.” I hold up my hand, cutting Mac off, because I know what’s coming. I don’t want to answer a million questions, and I don’t want to listen to her and Libby tease me about Levi, especially when I’m feeling so conflicted.
“I was just going to say that was nice of him,” she grumbles, walking to the kitchen to get a bottle of water from the fridge.
“Sorry, I’m just tired.” I sigh, rubbing my face. I’m actually not tired anymore, even though I should be, since it’s almost three in the morning. Instead I feel wired, like I’ve just drunk three cups of coffee and taken a trip on a roller coaster.
“Come watch a movie with us,” Libby pleads, and I look to the couch, where she and Muffin are curled up under one of my blankets.
“I think I’m just going to go to bed.”
“We won’t talk about Levi anymore if you watch a movie with us,” Mac pouts, taking a seat on the couch and pulling a separate blanket from the back.
“Fine,” I give in, feeling guilty for being so short with her moments ago. Kicking off my Toms, I go to the couch and take a seat next to Mac. As soon as I sit, she drapes part of her blanket over my lap, then picks up the remote. “What are we watching?”
“Nightmare on Elm Street.” Libby smiles while Muffin stands, only to lie down across Mac’s lap so she can rest her head on my thighs.
“God, I haven’t seen this in forever,” I say, absently running my fingers through Muffin’s thick fur.
“Me neither. I wonder if it will be as scary now as it was when we were kids.”
“I doubt it. Most movies I thought were scary back then aren’t as scary now,” I say as the movie starts to play. Not even thirty minutes later, I yawn for the fourth time in a row and look over at Mac and Libby, finding them both asleep. I think about waking them and helping them set up the pullout, but they honestly look comfortable enough. Flipping off the television, I climb carefully off the couch and head to my bedroom as Muffin follows me. Shutting my bedroom door, I turn out the light, take off my sweats, and climb into bed, feeling Muffin jump up a second later. She groans as she flops down next to me. Lying there in the dark, it takes forever to find sleep as my mind spins with thoughts of Levi.