Pulling up to the cabin, I curse as I push my door open and race up to the house. I had to pull over to take an emergency call from Oliver, but I don’t see another car anywhere in the vicinity, so I’ve still beat Hudson here. Thank fuck.

The silence that greets me when I shove the door open is ghostly.

“Madison!” I call out as I make my way through the living room, into the kitchen, but there’s nobody downstairs. Perhaps she’s still sleeping. I take the steps two at a time and shove into the bedroom where I’d taken her again and again last night.

The sight that meets me knocks the breath from my lungs. Her naked body is lying in crimson sheets.

“Baby, fuck,” I curse loudly, as I rip the sheet apart. The flimsy material tears easily. Quickly, I wrap her arm up to stop the blood loss. Then I cocoon her in the blanket that’s been folded neatly on the chair beside the bed. Her body is so cold, and I wonder just how fucking long she’s been like this. Why would she do this?

There’s a blade beside her — small and silver — underneath her ruby-colored life force. Anger courses through my veins when I think about her doing shit like this. I’ve never felt this kind of rage before.

“Hold on. Please, just fucking hold on,” I tell her as I make my way down to the car. Leaving the house unlocked, I place her on the back seat, keeping her hidden in the blanket. I don’t know how much blood she’s lost, but I need to get her to the hospital.

My heart aches. It feels as if it’s been carved from my fucking chest.

Hitting dial on my phone, I wait for Oliver to answer. On the third ring, his voice comes from the other end. “Callan.”

“I need you to call in your contacts at the hospital. It’s an emergency.”

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“It’s Madison. I found her bleeding out on the bed in the lake house. I’m not sure what the fuck happened, but she’s unconscious.”

“Fuck,” his hiss comes across loud and clear. “I’ll ensure they know you’re on your way. Dr. Harlow will be waiting at Chicago Gen,” he tells me then hangs up. My lungs feel as if they’re not pulling in enough air.

I’ve seen blood. I’ve fucking caused so many deaths, but this is far too much for me to handle. It’s surreal. I wanted my girl, I finally found her, and I can’t fucking lose her.

“Madison fucking Parker, don’t you dare die on me,” I warn her, even though I know she can’t hear me. My foot is flat on the gas pedal, my body thrumming with anxiety. It’s not too far, but timing is critical.

And as I weave through the traffic, I do something I haven’t done in a long while.

I pray.

I fucking pray to a God who has long since forgotten me because of all the things I’ve done. Since I turned sixteen, I’ve walked the dark path my father led me on. He didn’t force it on me; I walked willingly. I followed him, and I wanted everything the life offered.

---

“Callan,” my father’s rough voice comes from the doorway.

When I turn around, I find him holding a sleek, silver gun. I don’t know much about them, but from watching the men who work for us, I’ve noted a few things about how they’re held, how to load one, but I can’t for the life of me tell you what the name is or what caliber it is either.

One day though.

I’ll learn.

“I need ye with me right now, son,” my father huffs, turning to leave only for me to traipse behind him. I’m the eldest by one year. Carrick, my younger brother, and Cayleigh, our little sister are nowhere to be found, and I wonder if he’s sent them into town.

When he has the men here for meetings, he sends them away so they don’t have to watch what’s happening. My brother only being fifteen is too young to be in this life. And our sister, who’s seven, certainly shouldn’t be around the goons my father employs.

As soon as we round the corner and step into the garage, the stale scent of blood assaults my nose. The metallic smell is heavy, as if it’s a cloud consuming me.

“What is going on?” My question goes unanswered.

“This.” My father gestures to the man seated on the chair before me. He’s bloodied and beaten, bound with metal cuffs to the chair. His once white teeth are broken and red with ruby-colored, metallic liquid. “Is a man who was stealing from us.”

I glance at my father, then back at the thief. Anger surges through me at the news of what this asshole was doing. He deserves being beaten.

“I trust you’re ready for this, Callan?” My father’s voice is steady as he hands me the heavy metal gun. My eyes fall to the weapon, then raise up to the eyes that match my brother’s. Deep golden orbs.

“I’m ready,” I inform him.

“Good boy,” he tells me. “Remember, always be ruthless.”

His words echo as I lift the gun and aim it at the man’s forehead.

Ruthless.

I smile when I pull the trigger and watch his head slump forward.

This is what I’ve wanted for so long, for my father to be proud of me. And when I turn to face him, I see it. He is proud.

---

But now, with my girl on the back seat close to death, I want something else. I want something so much more. I want the one thing I never knew I’d ever want or need.

I want love.

I only want it with her.

As soon as I pull up to the hospital, I’m out of the car in seconds. Racing to the back, I jerk open the door, gently lifting my girl in my arms. Not bothering to lock the car, I head into the emergency department.

“Dr. Harlow,” I tell the nurse who glances up as I hastily walk through the doors.

“He’ll be here in a moment,” she says, punching something into the computer keyboard. “Can you tell me the patient’s name?”

“Madison Parker,” I inform her, and I don’t miss the raised eyebrows as she continues her insistent tapping.

“I’m Dr. Harlow.” A man with a full head of silver hair races toward me with a team of nurses behind him. “Get me a gurney. Let’s get this girl up into surgery. I want her hooked up to an IV and monitors immediately. Move!”

I’m following behind them as they make their way through two large double doors.

“We’ll call you once we’ve stabilized her, but we need you to wait out here,” the doctor tells me earnestly.

“Don’t you dare let her die,” I warn, my voice dripping anxiety and fear. I hear it. I’ve heard fear on my victim’s pleas so many times. And now, here I stand, waiting for the woman I love to make it through the next few hours.

“I’ll save her,” he tells me confidently and disappears along with Madison lying on a steel bed. My body is tight with worry. That dark thought of her not making it niggles at the back of my mind. And as much as I push it away, for some reason, it’s not letting up.

I pace back and forth in the waiting area. My mind playing out all the scenarios that could’ve led to her doing that shit again. Why would she fucking do that? I told her I claimed her, that she’s mine. Last night was my promise to her.

Nothing makes sense.

There was no reason for her to even think taking her life is worth it. I should’ve told her I love her. Last night, when I claimed her, I should’ve asked her to marry me, to spend forever with me.

But my fear overrode the words, and I just fucked her. I made her come on my cock, and I filled her with my own release. Something I’ve never done with any other woman in my past. I’ve never trusted anyone enough to let go. To fully give myself.

And now, the one woman I did allow in has gone and fucking mutilated herself for no apparent reason. My phone buzzes in my pocket, and I know it’s Oliver.

“What’s up?”

“How is she?” he asks.

Sighing, I stop and lean against the wall. I need a fucking cigarette to calm my erratic heart and mind. “She’s in surgery, or some shit. The doctor said he’ll let me know as soon as she’s stable.”

“I’m warning you, her father is on the way. Not sure how he found out, but the tracker on his car is on the move.”

“Fuck.”

I know what that’s going to cause. He’s going to come here and blame me. And that’s something I can’t have.

“I’ll head out. I don’t need to be here when he arrives. Or I might kill the bastard myself.” I hang up before Oliver can reprimand me for wanting her father dead, but it’s my honest opinion. The asshole angers me.

I head back to the nurse’s station, grabbing a blank page from a small notepad and scribble on it. “I need you to call me as soon as she’s awake.” I push a page with my number toward her. “Please,” I beg. I fucking beg. Because I can’t take this. Losing her will leave me vulnerable, open to the pain I long since shoved into the back of my mind.

“Yes, sir. I promise, she’ll be okay.”

I turn, making my way out the door before her father arrives with the press hot on his tail. The first place I want to go is Sins, to drink, to lose myself in a bottle of Jameson. But I don’t. I head out to the apartment my brother offered me when I arrived.

All I can do is wait, and that’s leaving me antsy. There’s one person I look to when I feel the need to kill. When all I want to do is find Hudson Brockovich and slit his throat, but I need to wait for Oliver, so I head to see my sister.

Even though she’s far younger than me, there’s still that shred of hope she holds onto. The same hope I lost a long time ago. She gives that to me, that comfort that Madison can’t offer right now.

Slipping into the driver’s seat of the SUV, I head to Cayleigh in the hope that she can offer me some form of sanity while I lose my mind with worry.