Chapter 5

Harper

The kiss lingered on my lips as I rode in silence with Nora back to the house. She'd been going on and on about the nerve of Jeremy Daniels, her voice loud and filled with a false frustration that was nothing more than attraction. She just couldn't see it, and I wasn't going to be the one to bring it into the light. We fought better than anything else, and I'd had enough angst in my own life.

"I think I should just slap him. Plain and simple." She huffed.

"Wait a minute." I glanced over at her. "What did he do again?"

"Are you not listening? I told you that he hung out around my booth at the fair all damn afternoon. Like he has nowhere else to be!" She gripped the steering wheel and growled. "He makes me want to punch a baby."

"You're a doctor. Let's not do that, m'kay?" I laughed and rolled down my window before leaning out a little and letting the wind blow my hair back. "I barely remember what it feels like to live. Not a high or a buzz, but to really live."

Her voice softened, and I knew she wanted to go deep with me. She'd been so good not to ask what was eating me alive, though I'd made it obvious that something was on our last few phone calls.

"I'm here for you. Whatever you need." She reached out and gripped my hand.

I glanced over at her. "Luke kissed me tonight, and it seems so silly, but I felt alive again. Like adventure could be mine one day."

"Why not today?" She rubbed her thumb over my knuckles and gave me a look mother would give me all of the time. "And good for you for taking that kiss. Was it hot?"

"So hot." I leaned back out the window and closed my eyes. "It made me feel like a girl again."

She laughed. "You'll always be a girl, silly. The kind that gets into trouble and blames her little sister. The kind that looks for love in the all the wrong places, but that's okay. Embrace it."

"And you?" I glanced at her. "What girl is still inside of you, Nora?"

She pulled her hand back and gripped the steering wheel. "A scared one."

"How so?" I moved back into my seat and pulled my legs up, wrapping my arms around my shins.

"I don't know." She brushed her hair back as her eyes widened a little. She was going to close up if I didn't get her to open up. We'd been apart too long, living separate lives in hopes of never having to relive the pain and suffering of losing mom and dad. "I guess it seems easier just to ignore every guy that comes my way."

"Except that's not so easy with Jeremy, is it?" I rolled the window up as she pulled into her driveway.

"No. It's not." She glanced down at her hands. "I just know that if I give him a chance, he'll take and take and take and then when he's done... he'll walk away."

"You're so jaded for someone who's never been on a date, Sis." I got out of the car and walked to the front to wait for her. The sun had already started to set, and the burnt orange and red filling up the sky was enough to steal my breath.

"It's not that easy, Harper. I was sheltered by mom and dad, and you were a thrill seeker. You wouldn't understand." She moved past me.

I reached out and grabbed her wrist, forcing her to stop. "I would if you would talk to me."

"I'm not ready for that." She tugged her hand free. "You’re staying out here for a little while?"

"Yeah. I'm going to wonder back to Luke's property in hopes of finding him." I held my breath, waiting to hear her spill a zillion reasons why going out this late at night was a bad idea. She didn't say a word, but nodded and walked toward the house.

Where a huge part of me knew I should have gone after her, I couldn't force myself to do it. We weren't kids anymore. She needed to learn to live a little, and I needed to learn to live again.

I pulled my phone from my back pocket and walked toward the back of the yard, turning a little to start my hike across the open hill toward Luke's family's pond. He'd given me permission to be on their property, and sitting by the lake sounded perfect, especially if he saw me and showed up himself.

A quick text to Peter that I was fine and made it to Nora's, and I was free from distraction. Much to my amazement, stars sprinkled the sky in a way they never did back in New York. It had to be the thickness of the dark around me, the blanket of the night allowing the bright lights above to shine so well.

"Hey there. You're trespassing!" Luke's voice was playful.

I laughed and walked toward his porch as he stood barefooted in jeans and a t-shirt. "I wasn't sure you'd be home yet."

"Yeah, I just got here and took a quick shower. You end up helping Nora with allergy shots all evening?" He opened the screen door and jogged down the stairs.

The smell of his soap mixed with the light hint of cologne filled my nose. Every wicked desire I wanted could easy be played out with the handsome man in front of me. The fact that he drove a bike and owned a farm was only part of the deal... he was rich. And with wealth came power. Not that I wanted either, but the yearning for a dominate man my whole life left me seeking out the elements that forged men into standing strong, into being aggressive and taking what they wanted.

Did I want him to do that? With me?

I wasn't so sure.

"I did." I hugged myself and stopped in front of him. "I was going to take a walk by your lake if that's alright."

"I don't mind at all." He watched me with a hunger that I knew I'd give into before too long. "You want some company?"

"If you promise to keep your lips to yourself." I took a shaky breath.

"You don't like my lips?" He tilted his head to the side. "You didn't seem to protest too much earlier at the fair."

"I didn't want to be rude." I shrugged playfully and turned to walk toward the lake. He moved up beside me and reached out, taking my hand.

"Just in case you fall into a hole. I need something to pull you out by."

I laughed and snorted. "You're too much. A billionaire that is benevolent to the town's people and isn't married." I paused. "Wait... you're not-"

"I was." I wrapped his fingers around mine. "But she left three years ago."

"Left?" I swallowed the multitude of questions that followed the one word I uttered.

"Yeah." He ran his fingers through his hair and moved down onto the long dock that hovered above the lake. "She needed a faster life. One that was filled with significance, and I didn't."

"Oh." I sat down on the dock beside him and glanced up at the stars. "I was married for a while to a really good guy."

"And?" He pressed his shoulder against mine, forcing me to return my attention to him.

I glanced up at him, my eyes lingering on his lips. "And he was too docile. Too easy. I've always been one to live life full-speed ahead." I blinked and backed up a little. "A lot like it sounds like your ex-wife was."

"Maybe so." He reached out and brushed his thumb over my bottom lip. "Maybe if I had unleashed the wild side of my personality, she wouldn't have left."

"Do you wish she were still here?" I yelped as he reached over and gripped my waist, hoisting me up and pulling me into his lap.

I turned and straddled him, grateful for the jeans I had on. If it had been the skirt I was wearing the day before; we'd have been in trouble. I loved sex with strong men, and the one beneath me had me wanting to purr.

He pressed a kiss to the top of my chest, just above my breasts as his fingers dug into the top of my ass, his thumbs rubbing my hipbones. "Not at all. I quite like the woman sitting in my lap."

"You don't even know me," I whispered and rolled my hips as he growled softly against the top of my breasts.

"I want to." He glanced up and cupped the back of my head, pulling me down into a long, probing kiss. A hint of the brown sugar and BBQ sauce rolled across my tongue, and I moaned loudly, rocking against the thick length of his erection.

Why didn't I wear the skirt?

"I'm leaving in ten days, Luke. I'm a wild child who has fucked up so many times that I've lost count." I ran my hands up his shoulders and cupped his neck as I leaned down to breathe him in and kiss him a little longer.

His strong hands felt so good running down my back, over my ass to the backs of my thighs. "Spend the night with me. I don't care where you've been or what you've done. I want you in my bed."

He licked my lips, and my insides turned to liquid heat. His thick hair felt good under my fingers; his muscular chest pressed against mine was divine. There wasn't anything I wouldn't have done to be owned by him for a night before my world came crashing down.

A night beneath him would have been more than I deserved, and yet I knew I couldn't. He was addictive and I'd barely gotten to know him. A night of hearing him moan and feeling him thrust deep inside of me would lock me down to considering things I promised myself I would never consider again.

Love.

"I can't." I kissed him once more before crawling off of his lap. "I gotta go."

"Harper. No." He stood up and reached for me, but I backed up.

"No, seriously. I like you and think a friendship would be better than anything else we're planning on doing."

"No, you don't. That's a fucking lie."

"Maybe, but it keeps me safe." I turned and walked back toward the house as my heart beat against my chest.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Harper." His words followed me all the way home.

It wasn't him hurting me that I was worried about.