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Ryder: (A Gritty Bad Boy MC Romance) (The Lost Breed MC Book 1) by Ali Parker (92)

Chapter 13

Nora

 

I couldn’t believe he was angry with me but I decided to follow his suggestion and look into what happened with Meagan. I took out my phone and looked up their names as I walked to the porch and found the pizza waiting. It might have been hotter when he left it, but as I opened the box and took out a slice, it tasted just as good.

It seemed there was a whole lot of news about the suit from the time it happened, but I’d somehow missed it. That wasn’t hard since I didn’t watch the news. There was enough depression in the world without the aid of the media, and I wasn’t letting it touch any part of my life.

I found a link to an article and read the header aloud. “Billionaire Baby Scare Hoax.” I skimmed the titles and read through a few of the articles but that first headline had been the gist of it all. Meagan had lied. She’d gotten pregnant by another man and tried to pin it on Jeremy. Paternity tests had confirmed it. I sank into my chair. How could I have been so wrong? I’d just assumed and taken her word. Was I that afraid of being hurt?

I wanted to run to him, but before I could gather myself my phone rang. I was hopeful it was Jeremy, but it was just Harper. “Hey, Sis.”

“Hey, you. What was that name of the doctor you wanted me to call about space in his office?” I’d told my sister she should find a way to practice in town so she could move home.

“It’s Dr. Fenton. He should be able to tell you if those spots are still available. I mean, it has been a while since I told you about it.” My mood was horrible so my tone was clipped.

“You’re in a pleasant mood. Does it have anything to do with Jeremy?” I’d told her how we were talking, but not that I’d slept with him. “I know what’s happened between the two of you. Luke and I talk, you know? I hate that I had to hear it from him.” She sounded like our mother when she’d get that tone.

“I was trying to keep things private but I suppose that’s not Jeremy’s strong point.” I raked my hands through my hair and released a long breath. “I was looking up a case file on him.”

“Are you having him investigated?” She gave a little chuckle and made a sound of disapproval.

“No, it’s about an old suit that was filed against him.”

“Oh, you mean the one where he supposedly knocked up some chick? Yeah, Luke was telling me how that impacted Jeremy hard.”

Again, she was telling me things that I should have known, especially since I had slept with him. “Well, I didn’t know and I kind of shoved it in his face. I met the girl at her first doctor’s appointment and her story was so believable.” If I didn’t think he was honorable enough for a real relationship, then how could I expect he’d be good enough to forgive me and let me have one more chance?

“You should know better than to listen to small town gossip. So now that you’ve found out you’re wrong, what’s the next course of action?”

She was mothering me again, just like she’d always done since we were little. “I’ll go over and apologize. I just hope I haven’t screwed up my chances. I kind of insulted him again not even an hour ago. I thought you were him calling. We did it again.”

“Dammit, Nora, I told you to loosen up. I didn’t mean be loose.” Her laughter grated my nerves and I could hear the faint sound of Luke there snickering with her.

“You two are both impossible.” I took another bite of pizza wondering if I should take over a few slices for him. I decided it wasn’t half bad and wrapped them up in foil.

“You better get used to it and make things right with Jeremy. He’s going to be around a whole lot. That’s the same sound advice that Luke gave his brother and now I’m giving it to you.”

“I want to work it out. I’m not entirely sure how to go about it.” I hadn’t done anything like this before and my nerves were on edge. Jeremy had been angry the last time I saw him so I didn’t want him taking his anger out on me.

“You need to go to him then. I’m sure he’s just as miserable as you are and wants to make it right.”

“I’m nervous.”

My sister let out a deep sigh. “No, you’re in love. Trust me, I know.”

Harper had always given me decent advice and I knew when I hung up I should have gone right over and apologized, but I struggled back and forth with the idea. If I went over there then I’d accept him into my life and my heart. I wondered if I should give in at the last minute, but then I jumped to my feet and ran out the back door.

I ran across the grass to the house and then knocked on his door. It came open a moment later and Jeremy stood there drinking a beer.

“I’m sorry. I was all wrong about you and Meagan. I was just so scared of getting hurt. All of the other men in my life have used me and discarded me like a piece of trash. I wanted you to be different, Jeremy, but you’re almost too good to be true.” I didn’t know if my words were registering or not because his face was as stiff as stone.

“Yeah, I’m not used to women wanting me for anything but sex or money, so I guess I was a little hard on you too.” I thought of his powerful thrusts and felt the tickle between my legs.

“I deserved it. I hope you can forgive me and I understand if you never want to see me again.” I went into desperate mode. “You had every right to leave earlier, but I wish you hadn’t. I don’t want us to fight.” I stood there looking at my feet next to his and didn’t know what else to say. “I was going to bring you some pizza but I left it at home.” I was going to offer to go get it when he shook his head.

“I’m not worried about it. I’ve lost my appetite now and I’m more concerned with my thirst.” He held up a beer and I wondered if he’d intended to get drunk. Maybe it was a way he drowned his sorrows or his anger.

I let out a sigh thinking what a big mistake I’d made. “Why didn’t you just tell me about Meagan when I mentioned it?”

His face darkened with a scowl. “Why should I have to? I don’t owe you any explanations for who I am. If you’re too scared to figure that shit out on your own then there isn’t any hope for us anyway.” His words wounded and I glanced to the floor.

He put his hand on my shoulder. “Look, Nora. I know that we’re going to have to be around one another because of my brother and your sister, and I’m willing to deal with that, but I don’t see how it’s ever going to work out for us until you’re able to trust me.”

“I can trust you. I know that now, Jeremy. I wish we could start all over again, I really do. I’d do things so much differently.”

“Well, I hope you don’t regret what happened between us because I don’t. I never will. I cared about you and it wasn’t enough, and that’s how it will have to be. I trusted you, but now I’m the one who’s not so sure.” He slowly closed the door in my face.

I stood there for a long while staring at the door and hoping it would open, then I turned around and took the long walk home. I couldn’t believe things had ended this way just when I thought we’d have it all worked out.

I had done everything I could to avoid a broken heart, but now it seemed inevitable. I walked back across the lawn and into my house to put the cold pizza away. I couldn’t even look at my kitchen table and considered burning it. How would I ever have a decent meal there again knowing what had happened on top of it?

I’d never again feel his tight body against mine. Never again share a kiss or a knowing smile across the room. I’d kissed it all away with my own doubt. It was all I could do to drag myself to bed and not run over there demanding for another chance.

I’d let a little time pass and then see what happened. With any luck, he’d miss me and show up, but the hope of that soon faded knowing how stubborn Jeremy was.

I didn’t have much hope left.

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