The cold didn’t stay as the hours passed, but the monster lurking within me did. Prowling. Hunting. We moved as one when I stepped under the shower, and my sister came in after me. Naked as the day we were born, she was babying me, but I didn’t think it really had anything to do with me being injured. She was calming herself as she scrubbed my skin clean of the Hydra’s blood then passed me off to Blair, who wrapped a plush bathrobe around my shoulders. Maybe they were both shaken. I couldn’t imagine what I would’ve felt seeing either of them go under… I shivered, leaving the memory of the lake where it belonged—in the past.

They whispered about me when they thought I couldn’t hear. Or maybe they knew I could and were just waiting for an ember of the fire I’d felt in the simulator to resurface. The others, the nine, were stuck somewhere between fascination and fear. All but one. It was the heir to House Graeme who dared to approach me as I sat stiffly on Blair’s bed, while she worked a comb through my matted hair.

“Remind me not to piss you off, matter manipulator,” Scarlett said. She met my gaze, and nodded.

It had been bound to happen sometime, but I was surprised it had taken them so long to realize who I was and what I could do. Everyone in this room was deadly in their own right, but I didn’t believe for one second that any of them were as bloodthirsty as me. And I was glad.

I didn’t say anything to her before she walked away, but gave her the briefest nod of acknowledgment. Blair and Alexandra were the only ones who talked to me after that as the day wore on. The nine stayed on their side, and my friends stayed away. Aaron hovered, out of sight from the moment I’d left the simulator, but though I couldn’t see him, I felt him. I still didn’t understand what had happened in the depths of those waters, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to. Not yet. I would need to go to him eventually, to figure this out, but not yet. Not today.

Inside, I danced with the monster—trying to put it back in its cage. Violet watched me from a corner of my mind. She wouldn’t get involved, though. This was a test of wills I had to face alone. We were no longer bound as three, but that didn’t stop her from lurking—and now that we were out, I had questions, and as usual, she evaded giving me answers.

“You weren’t ready. Still aren’t, but you’re getting there. You’re growing,” Violet whispered.

A caress for my ears alone. Well, mine, and possibly Aaron’s, judging by the way he shifted uneasily when she spoke. Violet was quickly becoming more than just some demon that lurked in my dreams, and I think he sensed that. Either way, she wasn’t going anywhere long-term, so I didn’t think too much of it.

“Why did you leave me, when I was underwater?” I asked, recalling those moments of confusion, when I’d called and she hadn’t come.

“Even I have my limits,” she said.

I didn’t know what that meant, but no answer came when I said as much. I groaned in exasperation, and Alexandra’s head snapped up.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, more jumpy than usual. Fiercer than ever. I waved her off, kicking my legs over the bed to pace. The monster was restless.

“I’m fine,” I said. My voice was nearly devoid of emotion, but I tried to show her that ember of heat so that she could maybe fan the flames. I didn’t know how to control the monster, though, and so I stayed silent when she announced it was time to get ready—and left her to it.

Alexandra dressing me wasn’t as strange as one might think, since I let her dress me for our birthday every year. It wasn’t hard to sit in the cold metal chair, still as stone, while she applied makeup to my face and Blair arranged my hair. It wasn’t odd to feel like a mannequin in my own skin, while the girl underneath recouped.

I used to think I was a dead girl walking, but that wasn’t entirely true anymore. Because I’d learned how to live. Learned that I could live. But I still didn’t understand happiness. The closest I came was the contented numbness that Violet’s presence pushed onto mine, helping me build weak barriers around the monster while we all regained our strength.

It wasn’t as easy, though. While I’d kept the monster in a cage before, it didn’t want to be caged anymore. It shot fire through my veins, only to be turned to ash as Violet weighed in. It was an exhausting process, rebuilding the barriers while the monster lurked. They wouldn’t be built in an hour, though, or even several hours. It had taken a lifetime to lock the creature in the dungeon and keep it there, and the monster was fighting tooth and nail to never return. I didn’t move a muscle, though. I didn’t flinch when it roared, or buckle when it stared me in the eye with more emotion than I was capable of feeling.

I sat straight as bone as my sister and cousin prepared me for the final test of my power and restraint. A ball with Anastasia Fortescue, where I assumed the Council would be watching our every move, no doubt seeing how tight a leash she had me on after my demonstration.

My hands curled into fists, the only sign of my internal struggle, as Alexandra finished painting my lips. She took two steps back, her own cherry red lips curving into a sly smile. She was as gorgeous as always, a living flame in a dress of dark red satin. She motioned for Blair to come around and have a look.

“She’s…perfect,” Blair said. Her eyes were frigid but glowed with pride and something else. Her gown was more ornate than Alexandra’s, with a tight bodice of ice-colored lace that fell freely past her waist and all the way to her feet. A single split to mid-thigh revealed a pair of pristine white ankle-boots. An odd choice for this type of party, but if it came to a fight, she was prepared. I had no doubt she’d strapped weapons where no one would see them, as had Alexandra.

My own arms were bare, though, and my legs were entirely visible through the chiffon fabric. No weapon’s belt or straps adorned my body. I wasn’t even wearing a bra.

“Are you ready?” Alexandra asked, reaching out for my hands, which never moved.

The monster quieted when I slammed down another brick in an attempt at forcing it into submission. The wall climbed higher and higher, still fragile while the mortar set, but there, nonetheless.

No part of me had been left unscathed. Even my fingernails now shone like amethyst gemstones, and I wasn’t sure I was ready to see what the rest of me looked like. Alexandra gripped my hands, spreading a pleasant heat across my skin and countering the numbness that threatened to overcome me. Whatever shoes she’d put me in didn’t suck as much as the usual strappy heels. I glanced down, past the see-through chiffon, at the sky-high black ankle-boots, more edgy than Blair’s but just as functional. They were similar enough to my combat boots that my feet didn’t complain much, despite the added height. Two fingers went under my chin, lifting my face to the mirror.

The chiffon was draped over both shoulders, covering my breasts, but not my chest, not my scars. It bunched at the waist—where the solid black slip underneath formed the tiniest of shorts—then flared out like billowing smoke when I moved. Every inch of my legs was visible, and my arms were the barest of all. My scars on display as tattoos against my ivory skin.

“No weapons?” I asked stiffly.

Blair flashed me a wicked grin as she motioned to my hair. Lo and behold, she’d braided it around my head in an elegant updo, with intricate dagger handles sticking out like the jewels in a crown. My eyes were almost fathomless, but also inexplicably violet. It wasn’t the same as my other’s, not quite that hue, but it was there, and it paired beautifully with the dark purple lipstick that sealed the package.

“I approve,” I said, turning from the mirror. I was death incarnate, with a beauty so dark only the bravest of souls wouldn’t quiver.

“That’s all?” Blair scoffed.

Alexandra shrugged, turning to the counter and playing with something there. “Coming from her, that’s high praise.”

I wandered over, stopping when I saw what was in her hands. “A mask?” I asked, marveling at the red feathers of the phoenix.

“It is a masquerade,” Alexandra replied, slipping her new identity on. It was striking with the dress, and took her from elegant beauty to an unforgiving bird of prey.

“What do you think?” Blair asked.

I glanced in the mirror at her porcelain white mask, with delicate little ears. Silver glittered around the edges where there would’ve been fur. The nose made it unmistakable. I grinned at the white wolf, because she couldn’t have chosen better for herself.

“Fitting. Where’s mine?” I asked, startled when they fastened a mask of raven feathers around my eyes. Simpler then either of theirs, but a statement nonetheless. An animal of death. A warning and a promise.

I smiled in the mirror, and a shadowed goddess smiled back.