My flight to Tennessee was long and wearisome. It probably didn’t help that I couldn’t get Emma off my mind. Even though what I did was for her own good, I hate myself for having to do it. My leg has been numb the entire flight. I sling my bag over my shoulder and retrieve my cane from the overhead compartment. I’ve waited for the last person to get off the plane before getting up so I could slowly work my way through the narrow alley. Now that I am here, I have no idea what comes next. My thoughts never went any further than this point.

It takes me awhile, but I finally make it to the loading area and grab a cab. I wish silence was the only thing I could hear on my way to Nash’s old house, but the voices in my head and heart are screaming at me. I roll the window down and let the wind blow in my face.

It’s been three years since I’ve been here, but I know Nashville would never sell her house. She told me before I left that it would always be here waiting for me. I’m telling myself now that the last three years were not in vain. I know I was meant to meet Emma and fall in love, I was meant to help her get her sight back. I will always remember how she made me feel loved. Making love to her was better than anything I could have ever imagined. While away, I grew up and became a man. I’ve made the right decision and now I have to live with it, like a man. She’s a beautiful woman, who will now have the beautiful life that she deserves.

The cab pulls up to the dark house. I pay the driver and climb out with my bag and cane. Using the small light on my keychain to see, I slowly navigate the porch steps and unlock the front door. Inside, I toss my bag to the ground in the dark. I remember this house like the back of my hand and, anyways, my head hurts too damn bad to even bother with a light. I walk down the hall and stop in front of TR’s door. I place my hand on the door and hang my head.

The wood floor squeaks as I continue down the hallway. Just as I turn the knob to my door, the light flies on and I find myself staring down the barrel of a gun.

“Sam! Oh my God, I almost shot you.” Anna puts the gun down and hugs me, then steps back and slaps me in the face.

“What the hell was that for?” I ask rubbing my cheek.

She places her hands on her hips. “What do you think? You’ve been gone for three years and you show up here in the middle of the night, not telling anyone you were back?”

I lean on my cane and limp past her, sitting down on the end of bed. “Are you living here now?”

“What’s happened to you? You look like hell and you’re back to using your cane.” She plops down beside me. “And yes, I live here now. Nash said I could live here until you showed up again.”

I run my hand down my face. My beard has started growing back. “I feel like hell.”

“That doesn’t answer any of my questions.” She folds her arms across her chest.

“Can we not do this now? I’m exhausted.” I fall back on the bed.

She lays down on her side next to me. “It can wait until tomorrow. I’m glad you’re finally home. We’ve all missed you. August is going to be so glad to see you.”

“I highly doubt that. Mom said they were having another baby.”

“They had a baby boy two weeks ago. He looks just like August. Sara turned four a few months ago. She’s gotten so big and sassy. And you’re wrong, August will be happy you are back. I know this for a fact because they named their little boy George Samuel Rylan. He wouldn’t have done that if he wanted nothing to do with you. Don’t get me wrong - he may be pissed - but you know he has a huge heart.”

I sit up and try to take my boots off. “I don’t want to go into TR’s room tonight. Can I sleep in here with you?”

She kneels on the floor in front of me. “Let me help you,” she says, unlacing my boots. She tugs each boot off one by one. I use my cane to stand up and she pulls my shirt off over my head. “Do you want to sleep in your jeans or your boxers?” she points to my pants.

“Boxers. I promise I’m too tired to try anything.”

“I know you would never try anything with me,” she says. I unbuckle my pants and manage to get them below my hips before I fall back onto the bed. She takes one leg at a time and pulls them off of me. I drop my cane and crawl to the top of the bed, curling into a ball. The last thing I remember is the light going off and the bed dipping as Anna curls up next to me.

* * *

The smell of brewing coffee rouses me from my sleep. The neon numbers on the alarm clock next to my face say that it is 11 o’clock. I scoot to the end of bed where my jeans are laying on the floor next to my cane and struggle to pull them on, balancing on my cane. The cane makes a racket on the wood floor. No wonder Anna heard me last night.

Anna is sitting at the kitchen table going through some mail. “You finally up? I was trying to be quiet to let you sleep.”

I open a cabinet and take out a coffee mug. “Are you still working at the hospital?”

“If that is your way of asking me why I’m not at work, it’s because I called off today. You have some important things to do today and I wanted to be here to support you.”

I chuckle. “Either that or you wanted to see August chew me out.”

“Yeah, well, there is that too,” she laughs. “Seriously, I thought maybe we could talk. You and I used to be pretty good at that, but before we do, I’m going to get you a shirt to put on. I can’t be serious with you while watching your new-found muscles taunting me.” She gets up and comes back with a clean, folded t-shirt for me. I recognize it as one I left behind. It fits much more snugly against my body than I recall. “See, I told you, you filled out. Not the young man I remember.”

“You have no idea,” I say, blowing on my coffee.

“Why are you back to using your cane? Did you get hurt?” She leans her elbows on the table and folds her hands together.

“My back has become unstable and it won’t be too much longer before I’ll be back in a wheelchair.”

“Have you been to a doctor?”

“I have.” Pity enters her eyes as I sip my coffee.

“Can’t they do surgery again?”

“No,” I lie. It’s easier than telling her the truth right now.

“Where have you been, Sam?”

“Florida.”

“Florida? That’s all I get?” she huffs.

“Look, I know August is going to ask me the same questions in a few days when I see him, so let’s just wait until I can answer all the questions at one time.” Anna shoves up from the table just as I take another sip of coffee and it splashes into my lap.

“What the hell, Anna?”

She comes around to my side of the table and grabs my ear. “I don’t give a shit if you are a grown man, you will get up off your ass and see August today.” She’s pulled me out of the chair and is headed for the front door.

“Anna, let go!” I yell at her, but I wouldn’t dare lay a hand on her.

“I will only let go if you knock some sense into that head of yours. There is no way I’m letting you sit here for days before you see him.” She lets go and places her hands on her hips. I know that stance well and she means business.

“Can I at least finish my coffee and get a shower?”

She looks at her watch and then back at me, pointing a long finger my direction. “You have ten minutes to be in my car. I’m going to pull it out of the garage and wait for you. When your ten minutes are up, if you are not out here, I’m coming in to get you. You better damn sure hope you have clothes on because I will drag your sorry ass out of here naked. You got it?”

“Damn Anna, you haven’t changed one bit,” I bark, turning away from her.

“Yeah, well, I’m not the one who needed to change,” she yells back at me.

I hurry up and shower and find some clothes. If I know anything about Anna, it’s that she says what she means. I have no doubt she would deliver me to August naked. She is waiting for me on the front porch when I walk out the door, tapping her foot impatiently.

“You’re a lucky man. You had one minute to spare before I came in after you.” She takes my arm and wraps it around her shoulder to help me down the steps. I smile to myself. She may act like a badass, but she cares about me deeply.

I’m quiet on the ride to August’s house. She glances in my direction. “You can be speechless now, but you need to find your words by the time we get to his house.” She looks down the road and then back at me with a grin on her face.

“What?”

“I like the scruff on your face, it makes you look all macho.”

“When’s the last time you got laid?” I laugh.

“Oh, I like this new Sam. Wait…you finally had sex, didn’t you?” She’s laughing.

“That would be none of your business.” I scowl at her.

“You did come back a man.” She’s still laughing. I reach over and turn up the radio to drown her out. The thought of Emma makes my heart hurt.

We pull up to the security gate and Anna punches in the code. August didn’t need to hide behind a gate until I brought TR into their lives. His truck is parked out front. “How come he’s not working today?” I ask her.

“He’s been home helping to take care of the new baby.” She puts her car in park and comes around to my side, letting me support myself on her to get out. My stomach twists itself into knots as we walk through the front door.

“August!” she yells.

“Don’t you ever knock?” I hear him yell back from the kitchen.

“I see things haven’t changed a bit between the two of you,” I say.

“Nope, and I wouldn’t have it any other way,” she tells me. “Look who I found!” she calls out loudly as we round the door into the kitchen.

August freezes in place with his drink halfway to his mouth. “Sam, you’re home!” Nash says, heading straight for me. “It’s so good to see you!” She embraces me in a bear hug but my eyes never leave August, who still hasn’t moved. “Please tell me you’re home for good.” She leans back to look at me. “You look so different, so grown up.” She links her arm in mine and turns to face August. Out of the corner of my eye, I see her squint her eyes at him.

He slowly gets up and walks in my direction with his head down. When he reaches me, I see tears in his eyes. He takes my face in his hands and kisses me on the cheek. “I’m so glad you finally found your way home. I’ve missed you.”

I drop my cane and hug him. It’s the first time I’ve let go of my emotions, and I fall apart. The four of us stand there crying for a long moment. I feel little hands at my knees. “Uncle Sam,” Sara says, trying to pry in between us. I sit down on the floor in front of her.

“You remember me?” I ask. She hugs my neck.

“Daddy shows me pictures of you all the time,” she says in the sweetest little voice. She leans back with her little fingers in my hair. “Have you met my new baby brother?”

I look up at Nash and August. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here. I’d love to meet him.” I grab my cane and try to get off the floor, but I slip. August walks behind me and places his arms under mine and pulls me up. He doesn’t say anything, but I can see the questions in his expression. Nash disappears for a minute and comes back with the baby in her arms. I make my way to the table and sit down. She doesn’t hesitate to place him in my arms.

“This is your nephew, George Samuel Rylan.”

Anna is right, he does look just like August. “He’s beautiful.” I kiss his little face.

They let me visit with the kids for a little bit before everyone disappears one by one, except for August. “Can I get you something to drink?” he asks, opening a cabinet.

“I could use some water, thanks.”

He fills a glass with ice and water from the fridge door and places it in front of me, sitting across from me. “Where have you been? And what’s up with your legs?” I don’t hear judgement in his voice, only concern.

I take a sip of my water before answering him. “I went to Florida, bought a house and fixed it up myself. It was a nice little piece of land with a clean lake on it. You would have loved it.”

“You’re not going back?”

“Nope, I sold it.”

“And your legs?”

“The doctor says I’ll be crippled again soon. My back has become unstable and is deteriorating.”

“What about having another surgery?”

“Not possible.” I down the rest of my water.

“Have you seen your specialist to confirm that?” He gets up and sits next to me.

“No, but I have been seen. There is no surgical option.”

“I’m so sorry, Sam.”

“How can you be so nice to me? I left here. I walked out on all of you.”

“You did what you had to do to get through a hard time. Nobody can blame you for that.”

“Yeah, you could.”

“You needed to find yourself. Did you do that?”

“Yes, I did. I’m not the same man that left here. Or should I say, the boy that left here.” I twirl the empty glass in my hand. “I’m sorry I was angry with you for going to TR’s funeral. It took me a good while to understand it, but I do now.”

“Do you also get that Nash and I never blamed you?”

“I know you didn’t, I blamed myself.”

“Do you need anything?”

“No, I’m totally self-sufficient now.”

“Then why do you look like shit?”

I clench my jaw tight. “Because, I fell in love with a girl and I lost her.”

“It’s obviously killing you. Can you get her back?”

“No, nor do I want too.” It’s a lie I’m telling myself.

He stares at me for a moment. “For some reason, I think there is more to your story.”

“End of story, August. I need to move on.”

“Do you want to come work for me again?”

“No, I have a job that keeps me afloat. I just want to get settled in and try to live with the fact that I’ll be confined to a wheelchair again.” I rub my hand through my hair.

“Do you still have your car?”

“Yeah, it’s being shipped here from Florida. It should be here in a week.”

“If you need a ride anywhere, I’ve been home helping Nash. I could run you around.”

“I do need something.”

He leans close. “Anything, Sam.”

“Do you still have Bacon?”

He laughs. “Bacon is huge and he runs this place.” He gets out of his chair and I follow him out back. Bacon is laying in his pen and squeals when he sees me.

“Hey, boy,” I rub his head and look back up at August. “I had a goat for a while, Bacon would have loved her.”

“A goat? Where is it now?”

“I left her in Florida to keep a little girl company.”

He chuckles. “End of story, huh?”

I lean on the fence and lay my head down. “There is so much more I want to tell you.”

“You can tell me anything, Sam,” he says, hand on my shoulder.

“How about I start with ‘I’m sorry that I didn’t even call you while I was out finding myself.’ Things you’ve said to me or taught me were constantly in my head. There wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t want to pick up the phone and talk to you.”

“You’re here now. Tell me what’s going on in that head of yours.” He leans his back against the fence.

“I met a woman. Not just any woman - the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. I fell in love with her the day I met her, before she even noticed me.” I turn to face him. “I remember you telling me you fell for Nash at first sight. I didn’t believe you.” I laugh.

“No. If I recall, you made fun of me and hit on her.” He laughs and pats my shoulder. “Tell me something. Did you ever figure out what to do with your hands?”

I laugh out loud. “I more than figured it out. You were right, I knew exactly what to do.” I get serious again. “Can you tell me what to do now? I can’t stop thinking about her. I can’t stop wanting to be with her every moment of every day.” “I can’t tell you what to do, Sam. What I can tell you is that I feel that way about Nashville. You know she turned my world upside down for the better. I love that woman more than life itself and there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for her. When you find that kind of love, you need to hold onto it.”

“I do love her that much, she’s the reason I’m doing this.”

“Doing what, Sam?”

“Giving her up.”

“You are not making any sense. Why would giving her up be the best thing for either of you?”

I push off the fence and head for the back door. “Because her life will be better without a cripple.”

“Wait, you think she’ll love you less if you’re in a wheelchair?” He follows me inside.

“No, I know she won’t, but she won’t live her life caring for me. Do you have anything stronger than water to drink?” I hobble into his office where I know he keeps the liquor locked up.

He reaches in his desk drawer and grabs the keys, then unlocks the cabinet and withdraws a bottle of whiskey. He sets it down and pulls out two glasses, which he fills halfway. He pauses, then adds a little more to one of them and gives it to me, taking the other one himself. “Who is the little girl you’re talking about? Is she your kid?”

I down my drink and hand him the glass for a refill. “I would be so lucky to have a kid like that. She’s Emma’s little sister.”

He pours more of the amber liquid in my glass and hands it to me, swirling his untouched drink. “Emma,” he says thoughtfully.

When he says her name, I down the second glass. “I think I’m all talked out for now. It’s been a really long couple of days and I’d like to go home.”

“I’ll take you. I am really glad you’re home.”