CHAPTER EIGHT

RYDER

I beat on the door again. I’ve been standing outside the girls’ apartment for over ten minutes and no answer. I pull out my cell and dial my sister’s number. It rings several times and then eventually goes to voicemail. So I call Jaycent’s. I know that fucker is in there. He answers on the third ring.

“Hello?” His voice is rough from sleep.

“Get your ass up and answer the damn door,” I growl.

“What … Where are you …?”

“I’m at the fucking door!” I snap and demand, “Now answer it!”

“Who is that?” I hear Becca’s sleepy voice, and I pound on the front door again.

“It’s Ryder,” he tells her.

She sighs. “Hang up on him …”

“Jaycent, don’t you dare …”

The door swings open just as I speak. “What in the fuck are you doing?”

I’m surprised to see Ashlyn standing in front of me. Her eyes sleepy but narrowed at me as she tightens a robe around herself.

I storm in past her and hang up my phone. “We’re having a family meeting,” I say as I stomp down the hallway. Without knocking, I open Becca’s door and find her in bed with Jaycent.

“What the fuck, Ry?” she shouts, trying to shield her body behind Jaycent as he turns to face me.

“Get up, get dressed, and get your asses to the living room.” Then I slam the door shut.

“Have you lost your mind?” Ashlyn demands, and I hate how good she looks. Even just rolled out of bed, she still takes my breath away. “It’s four in the morning,” she adds, in case I didn’t already know what time it is.

“No. For the first time in a while, my mind is pretty clear,” I tell her, and she rolls her eyes.

“I’m going back to bed,” she states.

“Nope. You’re part of this meeting as well,” I say, grabbing her hand and dragging her over to the couch. She sits down with a huff but doesn’t argue.

Minutes later, Jaycent and Becca come walking out both fully dressed, thank

God. “Why are you here at four in the morning?” Becca demands.

“We’re having a family meeting,” I say, narrowing my eyes at Jaycent.

Jaycent looks from me to Ashlyn. She sits there, arms crossed over her chest with a look of pure hatred on her gorgeous face. When his eyes meet mine, he smirks. “Guess my phone call didn’t work.” Jaycent adds with a chuckle.

Before I can respond, Ashlyn speaks. “We’re not gonna talk about that.”

He shakes his head with a satisfied smile on his face. “I’ll start the coffee.”

“No,” Becca says, grabbing his arm. “We’re not having a meeting, Ryder. Have you lost your mind?”

“Why do people keep asking me that?”

“Because you have,” Ashlyn answers.

I turn to face her, the open floor plan allowing me a bird’s-eye view. “No. I’m not. But I am tired of not sleeping.”

“What does that mean?” Becca asks.

“I’ve been up for over a week over what happened between me and Ashlyn, and yesterday, I found out that all I had to do was talk to her. And then I also find out that my best friend is fucking my sister, and we need to talk it through.”

“Stop saying it like that,” Jaycent says from the kitchen.

“How should I word it?” I snap. “Because that’s how I see it.”

“Ryder.” Ashlyn says my name in warning.

I look at my sister and demand, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because of this reaction,” she says as if it’s obvious.

“Well, of course, I’m gonna react this way. He’s my best friend and seven years older than you are.”

“I’m seven years younger than you are, and you didn’t have a problem fucking me,” Ashlyn says with an arch of her brows.

“That’s …” Fuck! “Different …”

“Why?” she demands, standing. “Because I was just a fuck?”

My shoulders slump. “I didn’t mean that, and you know it.”

She places her hands on her hips. “Actually, I didn’t know that, so why don’t you explain it?”

“I was mad at you,” I say as if that justifies my actions.

“And that makes it okay?” she snaps.

“Stop!” Becca calls out. “Both of you just stop.” She points a finger at me. “I’m not gonna let you tell me who I can and can’t love.”

“Love?” I ask with a snort. “You can’t possibly …”

“I hooked up with Jaycent four years ago, Ryder,” she declares.

My mouth falls open, and I look over at the man I call my best friend. “Four years ago?” I ask breathlessly, and he hangs his head as if he didn’t want me to know that.

“Yes,” she answers me, and I look back at her. She narrows her green eyes at me, and then she smiles. “And we’ve decided to move in together.”

I start shaking my head. “You can’t be serious—”

“I am!” she snaps, interrupting me. “And you have no chance at changing my mind, Ryder.” I open my mouth, but she continues. “Now, my ass is going back to bed. Good night.” Then she turns and gives me her back.

I turn to face Ashlyn and Jaycent. He faces me as the coffeemaker turns on. He leans his back against the countertop and places his arms over his chest as if daring me to say something. To challenge him.

And I’m not gonna pass this up. I’ve got an entire week of rage built up in me. I walk over into the kitchen and come to a stop in front of him. I take a deep breath and try not to just go off on him. Four years? He slept with her four years ago. She would have been …what? Seventeen? Eighteen?

“How could you not tell me this?” I say, trying to keep my voice down now that Becca went back to bed.

“Ryder, I wanted to—”

“No! You didn’t!” I interrupt him. “Or you would have!” I snap.

He takes a step toward me as he narrows his brown eyes at me. “I tried!” he growls. “But then you were too busy feeling sorry for yourself over Ashlyn.”

“This has nothing to do with Ashlyn,” I argue.

“It has everything to do with her.” He points over at where she sits on the couch. “You haven’t cared about anyone else but yourself for a week, and now all of a sudden you want to know what Becca and I are up to?”

“That’s because I didn’t know about the two of you. It’s obviously been going on for a while,” I snap. “Believe me, I would have been all over it.”

“Why because you wouldn’t have allowed it?” he growls. “Like we need your fucking permission.”

“Of course, I wouldn’t have!” I snap. “I’ve seen how you treat your whores.” His eyes widen before narrowing into little slits. “You think you can make her happy? That you’re better than Conner?” I ask, shaking my head. “You’re not. You’re gonna break her heart and then what? You’re just gonna walk away from her like you did Jasmine.”

The next thing I know, his fist connects with my jaw, and the power behind it knocks me on my ass. Sprawled out on the kitchen floor, I look up at him.

His jaw clenches as he stares down at me with pure hatred, and I realize I may have made a mistake.

“Jaycent …” I sigh.

“I’m not having this conversation with you, Ryder,” he says through gritted teeth. “I don’t have to justify why or how I love her. Because it really just comes down to I don’t give a damn what you fucking think.” And then he walks out, leaving me sitting on the cold floor.

I sit up and touch my jaw and hiss in a breath from the sting of his punch. I look up as Ashlyn walks in, stepping over my legs and walking to the fridge. She pulls out an ice pack and then hands it to me.

Taking it from her, I press it to my face. “Thanks,” I mumble. My face is not the only thing hurt. My pride is pretty bruised.

She leans against the countertop and sighs heavily as she drops her head to look down at me. “You’re mad at the wrong person,” she says, and I frown.

“He kept a secret from me. A big one,” I argue.

“You should be mad at yourself,” she says, and I start shaking my head. “Yes,” she argues. “There’s so much you don’t know, Ryder.” I frown at her words. “Your sister is in love with a man who treats her right and loves her back. And you and I both know he is a much better person than Conner.” She looks away, taking a deep breath, and I hate that he was right. That I pushed everyone away because of her. That I didn’t have to go this past week without her. I could have been with her all along. Now my chances are smaller than they were when I thought I had lost her to Bradley. “That man loves her. That man wanted to tell you a hundred times, but he didn’t because she was too afraid if you found out that you would ruin the best thing that ever happened to her.”

“Ashlyn …” I start as I stand, removing the ice pack from my face.

“Have you ever stopped and listened to anyone other than your father?” she asks softly.I frown. “What does that mean?” What does my father have to do with my sister being in love with my best friend?

She runs a hand through her hair. “It means if it doesn’t have potential to make you money, you ignore it.”

She’s not the first woman who has said something along those lines.

“That’s what’s wrong with all of you.” Leslie looks from me to Jaycent and then back to me. “All you care about is what you can buy. Nothing to you holds value.”

I remember Leslie saying those words to me as she stood inside my apartment. But at the time, I didn’t understand. Now that Ashlyn has come along, I can see the meaning behind the words.

“That’s not fair,” I say but don’t argue because she’s right.

She looks away from me and lets out a laugh that holds no humor. “Life isn’t fair. And neither is love,” she adds. “Everyone in her world seems to be against her love for Jaycent.”

“Nobody knows about it except for you and me,” I say confused by her words.

Her blue eyes meet mine, and I hate the way they look so cold. Not like the ones that looked at me a week ago when she was chasing me out of this apartment. Those eyes held desperation, and now I understand why. She was afraid of losing me. But somehow, over the course of a week, she’s moved on. “Yes, they do. Your mother knows. Your father knows …”

“What? How in the hell am I the last to know about this?”

“You were too busy ignoring her because of me, and you missed out on so much.” She runs a hand through her messy blond hair. “You have a choice, Ryder. Either accept it or not. That’s up to you. But when she pushes you away, it will be nobody else’s fault but yours, and you won’t only lose a sister but you’ll lose a brother as well. Because he’ll take her side. That’s how it should be when you love someone.” She turns to walk away.

But I reach out and grab her, pulling her to a stop. “Why are you for their relationship?” I ask, wanting to understand. There must be something here that I’m missing.

She looks down at my hand wrapped around her arm and then her eyes meet mine. “The real question is why are you against it?”

ASHLYN

I turn and give him my back and walk to my room.

“And you?” I hear him ask.

“Me what?” I ask as I turn around, holding in a sigh. “I already told you how I feel about them.”

“I know. I’m talking about us.” He places the ice pack on the counter. “How do you feel about us?”

Us? He thinks there’s an us? He walks out of the kitchen, and my heart beats faster as he nears me. Now that we are all alone, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about those three words he said outside the restaurant—I love you!

My lips part, and I suck in a long breath, trying to calm myself, but it doesn’t work. He’s had this effect on me since I first saw him, and the time apart hasn’t helped.

He comes to a stop, and those dark green eyes look me up and down slowly. My robe isn’t flattering in the least, but the way he licks his lips makes me think he is remembering what I look like underneath it.

“Ryder …” I whisper as my legs start to shake. Don’t get sucked back in, Ashlyn. He left you when things got tough. He’ll do it again. He didn’t even give you a chance to explain yourself. But then again, he did say I love you. Is that all it’s gonna take to get me back? Three little words?

All these things go through my mind, but then he raises his right hand and brushes some loose blond strands behind my ear, and a shiver runs through me. “I love you, Ashlyn.” My knees buckle.

“That’s not fair,” I manage to whisper.

He gives me that panty-dropping smile. “I told you I wasn’t going to play fair.”

I let out a long, ragged breath, and his face grows serious. “Please tell me there’s still an us, baby,” he whispers, taking a step closer to me. His chest now pressing into mine, and I’m breathing heavily. “Tell me that you’ve missed me as much as I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you,” I say without thought as I look into his dark green eyes. I’m almost in a trance. Unable to pull away. Unable to push him away. I lift my hands and fist his black t-shirt. I expect a cocky smile, but instead, he cups my face with his soft hands, and I lean into him even more. My legs turning to Jell-O, and my head going foggy. This is what I have wanted for a week. This is what I’ve been dreaming about, and here it is, coming true.

“God, I wanna kiss you,” he says softly, and his eyes drop to my lips as he licks his.

My hands let go of his shirt, and they wrap around his neck. I pull him into me and tilt my head. He lowers his lips until they graze mine, teasing me, and I beg, “Please kiss me.”

His hands on my face pull me toward him as his lips capture mine in a rough kiss. His tongue meets mine, and I moan into his mouth.

All of a sudden, he pulls away, and I growl in protest as his hands let go of my face. They go to my sash around my waist, and yanks my robe open.

“Jesus!” He hisses when he sees I’m naked underneath it.

I don’t know why, but all of a sudden, I feel nervous. Insecure. I grab for the sash and go to tie it when he pushes my back into the hallway wall and presses my hands above my head.

“Ryder …” I pant as I shake my head side to side. My pussy tightens, and my lips part. God, he can get me so wound up in a matter of seconds.

“Don’t hide from me, baby,” he says, grinding his hips into mine, and I can feel how hard he is. “I wanna see you.” His hands cross my wrists, and he holds them both above my hand in one of his. “I wanna feel you,” he moans, running his nose down the side of my face until his lips touch my neck. My head falls back against the wall. “I wanna fuck you.”

My eyes spring open, and I rip my hands from his grip. “Ashlyn, what …?”

“Stop, Ryder,” I demand, pushing him away, and he takes a step back.

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

I swallow the lump that forms in my throat because I realize just how pathetic I am for him. He has ignored me all week, and all of a sudden, I’m willing to spread my legs for him. Hell, I was on a date with another man less than ten hours ago, and now here he is, and I’m all ready to take him back.

I look down to grab my sash and quickly tie it. Looking back up at him, I straighten my back and lift my chin. “I told you there is no us.” The words are hard to say because I don’t want them to be true. Now that I know I have such strong feelings for him, I can’t push them to the side. But this is my only option. What is done is done. “You promised me that you weren’t going to hurt me.” His face falls. “And you also said we were the exception. Turns out it was just a lie, and we are nothing but an average couple who failed one another.”

I push off the wall and give him my back as I walk to my room. It takes everything I have not to turn around and run into his arms, begging him to take me to bed.