We left my parents’ house just after four. It had been well over a week since I’d seen Emma for the very first time dancing on that stage, and my memories of her silky skin were as fresh as if she’d moved her hips for me just an hour ago. Each time I thought about her from that night, my pulse raced. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to keep my hands off her for long, and the only reason I hadn’t pushed further yet was because of the promise I’d made to her brothers. But now that I knew Emma wanted me as much as I needed her, I was willing to break that promise.

“You said the photo at the camp was taken at one of your happiest times. What happened at camp later?” Emma asked, bringing my attention back to the road ahead. She was so perceptive; nothing escaped her attention.

“You sure you want to know?”

“I want to know everything about you. Including the details of how you got that sexy scar on your brow.”

“Sexy?” My brow lifted at the remark.

“Yes, it makes you look bad ass.”

“Bad ass?”

“Stop repeating everything I say, and tell me what happened.” The sound of her laugh revived a happiness inside my chest. Actually, I was certain that no woman in my life had had such an intense effect on me.

I took a deep breath in before going into the second most dreadful day of my life – one which had not only scarred me physically as well as emotionally, but also bonded me with two friends for life. We developed the kind of camaraderie no one could ever break and ended up going into the military together. “It was our second week at camp, and we were supposed to leave in a few days. I’d been assigned a cabin with five other boys and had no clue only half of us would still be alive before the end of the day. Derek and Reeve were two of my mates. Derek I’d known from Ogden because, well, everyone knows everyone around here, and my parents are best friends with the Fields. Reeve we’d already met the summer before when we’d attended camp for the first time. We all got along very well, and soon the six in our pack were inseparable. With the memory of our kidnapping always present in their mind, my parents weren’t pleased to let me go, but the Fields encouraged them to finally give in, so they did.

“While I taught the guys how to fly fish, Derek showed me how to make tools from wood. He was really good with his hands. And Reeve showed us his kickboxing moves. He’s been training since he was a kid. He came from a big city, and his parents wanted him to be more independent and to learn how to stand up for himself. So it was really cool to learn the blocks and cross punches.

“When we first heard the gunshots, we thought someone was setting off the fireworks that were to be used that night. But when the screams and cries came, we knew something was wrong. Reeve took charge, as he always did. He peeked out the door where a fucking maniac was shooting everyone in his sight.”

I shook my head sideways at the memory, pulling over to the side of the road.

“The Rambo wanna-be held two automatic guns under his arms. When the bullets hit our cabin, shredding it like a spaghetti strainer, we all dropped to the floor. Only three of us escaped without being hit. When the round stopped, we knew we couldn’t stay in the cabin, as he would eventually start looking. He already had done so with the others, going from one door to another, shooting those who survived. I trusted Reeve when he made a plan to escape out the back window. He talked smart and was one of the bravest boys at the camp, so both Derek and I followed him – snuck out and ran into the woods. The hike to a nearby road or town would take days, so under a mature pine we hid for two hours before deciding we had to do something to help the remaining kids. For whatever reason, he’d kept some alive.

“From a cliff overlooking the camp, we saw the tied-up scouts and the madman who held an automatic rifle in each of his hands, firing one then the other up into the air if he didn’t like as much as the leaves ruffling in the wind. Those who made any kind of noise were shot.

“Oh, my God!” Emma’s hand flew to her mouth.

“You sure you want to hear the rest?” I asked. I’d lived with what I’d seen my entire life, and a simple memory made me sick to my stomach. Could Emma handle this?

She nodded. Her hand smoothed over my thigh.

“We didn’t know what he wanted for a while. There was no ransom or revenge talk of any kind. But when he started taking the boys one by one into a cabin, and the agony of their screams... I couldn’t believe anyone could do that to a child. Later we learned that he was not only a pervert, but also had schizophrenia.”

“What did you guys do?”

“There were still some left alive. We put our stupid plan into action quickly. Maybe too quickly. I still think we were lucky to walk out of the mess alive. Me and Derek were supposed to jump on each of his arms to restrain him while Reeve got a hold of his guns.”

“But you were only boys.”

“I know. But we couldn’t just sit back without helping, and it sure didn’t feel like we were nothing after we’d been trained at the camp to work together and to have each other’s back.”

I breathed out and started driving once more, taking a soft curve in the road and turning. Thinking about the attack again restored the nerves and adrenaline from earlier that day. Tightening my grip on the steering wheel, I wanted this conversation to be over before it even started. Reliving a nightmare wasn’t on the top of my list.

“When you’re young you think you can conquer the world, overcome any dread and obstacle, as if each one of us was Hercules. There’s no need to be objective. Reeve was supposed to be Hercules. He’d use his kickboxing skills to take the murderer down, but it didn’t go as planned. Reeve tripped when we sneaked behind Rambo, and before we could get to the guy, he already had the guns pointing at us. Fortunately, Reeve was a smart son of a bitch, and when he tripped he remained on the ground, completely motionless. We thought he’d died, but he was waiting for the right time to attack again. So when the gunman was pointing his rifles at us, Reeve picked up a rock and hit him over the head with it. He fired before falling to the ground. One of the bullets skimmed right here” – I pointed to my brow – “and another one went into Derek’s arm. But Reeve did it. He knocked the asshole out.”

I knew I’d skipped part of the story, but I preferred Emma not know what had happened to my friend. Partly because I didn’t want her to connect the dots but also because a girl shouldn’t have to hear about the gory details. How he’d suffered and still ended up saving us in the end boggled my mind each time I thought about it. He was truly someone I could count on and someone I would call a friend until the day I died. Reeve was a friend I’d take a bullet for.

“He saved your life.”

“He did.”

“Do you keep in touch?”

“Of course. We have a bond no one can break.”

“Does he live in Ogden as well?”

Fuck! Why so many questions, Emma? I don’t want to lie to you. I hated the feeling. Hadn’t Emma herself said that secrets could destroy people? But I couldn’t tell her the truth. I had to pay my debt and keep my end of the bargain. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything at all. Why did she have to be so beautiful and charming and witty? Why had the girl who was described to me as a spoiled brat turned out to be a smart woman I would give my life for?

“No, he doesn’t. But not too far.”

An hour plane trip away, you could say.

“What part of the military did Reeve go into?”

“Why? Do you think you’d prefer an army guy over a cowboy?”

“Don’t be jealous. You’ve been there too, so technically you’re an army cowboy.”

“I’m not jealous, Em. I’m just trying to figure out why so many questions.”

“I’m curious by nature. I know a lot of men who served the country, including my father. Besides, the more information the better.”

“You don’t say.”

“Are you making fun of me?”

“Yes. Will that get me in trouble with my PI?”

She yawned. “Yes, big trouble. In fact, trouble is my middle name.”

That I could believe.

“You’re tired.”

“It’s been a long day.”

It had been a long day, but it hadn’t changed how much I ached for Emma. I was drawn to her like a bear to a beehive and Emma was overflowing with sweetness – sweetness I would give anything to taste again. I shifted in my seat.

“I can’t believe you’ve gone through so much in your life. The shooting, your kidnapping. How did you get over it?”

“I don’t think I did. It’s with me every day. I don’t trust easily – almost ever.”

She sat quietly for a moment before she spoke again. “Do you trust me?”

The car was rolling down my driveway, and when I shifted the gears in to park, I breathed out, “Yes. With my life.”

“Why?” She cocked her head to the side.

“I don’t know, Em. Why do birds fly? Why is the sky blue? Why do you make me feel like a man not worthy of you?”

“I don’t try to.”

“I know you don’t. It’s me, Em. Always feeling like I can’t be enough for anyone. And with you, I just know I can count on you, and I wish I could reciprocate, instead of…”

…failing you, the way I failed Annabelle and Reeve.

“Instead of what, Eric?” she whispered.

With my arms braced against the steering wheel, I shook my head, saying, “To this day I have nightmares and fear for my sister’s safety. You know, because of her kidnapping.”

“You should go to San Francisco. Check up on her.”

“How would you feel if Julian and Tristan came here to check up on you?”

She slouched in her seat. “Okay, maybe you’re right.”

“But I did send a friend to do it for me.” I grinned.

I could see her thinking. The wheels in her head were spinning. Had I said too much?

“Sneaking around behind her back?” she asked.

“It’s out of love.” I shrugged.

“It’s clever.”

“Thank you.”

I will remember that when the time comes and you hate me.

“What if Julian or Tristan checked up on you?”

“The old me would say it’s out of love.”

“The old you?”

“Before my accident. They were much more easygoing. Afterward, not so much.”

“Because they love you.”

“I know they do. But I want their brotherly love of wedgies and noogies instead of constant harassment.”

I finally turned the engine off. Looking over at her I asked, “Have you talked to them about it?”

“Have you talked to your sister about your concerns?”

“No. So, let’s make a pact.”

Her eyes grew to double their size. “I’m listening.”

“Within the next month, we’ll each talk to our siblings.”

“And I can trust you to do so?”

“Emma, I promise you that you can trust me with anything. I would never betray you.”

Failure is another beast, though, and since I’d been lying to her the day I’d walked into her office, I had a feeling my failure would turn into the biggest betrayer of my life.